"You know, Malfoy is so arrogant" Weasley says: "I mean, he's got a big house, tons of money and is a spoiled brat and all that, but does he have to rub it in our face?"

The other two of the Golden Trio nod.

I turn and curl my hands to fists. 'Gryffindorks, like they know something' I thought, trying to comfort myself, it did not work, however.


"What are you doing here, Malfoy? Going to rub it in our face about all the expensive presents you've got?" Potter asks snidely.

"Leave me alone, Potter" I say and walk on to the Owlery, to my owl Ares.

Christmas holiday had just ended, and I had gotten presents, but they weren't like Potter thought they were. 'Damn Potter, thinking he's the only treathed badly at home.'


"What creature did this?" Madam Promfrey asks me.

I merely shrug.

"If you want to talk, Mr Malfoy, I'm here, you know that, right?" she aska, and I nod, but I know she did not mean it. No one ever does.


I tripped.

Malfoy's don't trip.

That's what my father always said, and I tried to stay standing, but couldn't. My broken arm had not healed yet, and I couldn't keep my balance.

I fell.

I heard a few Gryffindors laugh and bit my lip to stop from crying out in pain. More bruises. A new present.


Pansy told me today she loved me and cared for me. I had snorted. She couldn't love me. No one loves me. I'm not like Potter, trying to please everyone who says they love me. What was Pansy thinking? Narcissa probably told me I'd fall in her arms and ask her to marry me.

No way.

I'd rather not marry at all than marry that pig.

Pansy'll go to the Malfoys. She'll tell them I wasn't acting nice enough this year. Lucius will give me a long talk, and then...

Potter, thinking he is the only one who has it bad at home!


"What's that, Longbottem?" I ask, looking at the ring he is wearing: "Where did you get it?"

"My gran gave it to me, it belonged to my dad" he says and still backs away in fear.

"Oy, Malfoy, leave him alone!" Weasley shouts.

"I'm just looking, Weasley, it's not forbidden" I say.

"You just want it, like you want so much else!" Weasley says.

"Yeah" Potter agrees: "Want to swap with me for the summer, Malfoy? Perhaps you'll know what it's like not to have anything!"

"I'd love to, Potter" I murmur, but no one hears...

Longbottem stares at me as I walk away.

He did not hear.

I hope.


Severus told me to go to the Headmaster.

"Mr Malfoy, Madam Promfrey told me you had bruises and a few broken bones. How did you get those?"

Potter is the Headmaster's favourite. Dumbledore calls him Harry. Not me, I'm Mr Malfoy. Not Draco. Never Draco.

There's no grandfatherly tone, no, just the Headmaster's tone. The one he uses to almost everyone. Even to Lucius. I'm not like him. No, I'd never be like him.

"I fell" I say, loud, and clearly. "I've got homework, may I be excused?"

He nodds, of course he does. I'm no worry of him. I have people who... look after me. I'm not a hero who has no parents and lives with verbally abusing muggles. That's not me. But I'd rather be him then me. Perhaps he really wants to swap?

No, I can't let anyone go to Malfoy Manor instead of me.

They won't survive.


The Weaslette was crying today. The Trio, they were all worried. They hugged her, told her everything would be fine and that she did not need to worry. They kissed her on her cheek and forehead. All that to stop her from crying.

Weak.

She's weak.

All people are cry are weak. Malfoys aren't weak. They don't cry.

Every time I cried when I was younger I would get hit. Just to stop me from crying. I don't cry anymore. Not at all. Never.

Crying is only for the weak.

Pansy mocked her. And they told me to go away. Only because Pansy would do too then.

Gryffindorks are the worst people in the world.

No, they're not.


Granger slapped me again. Just because I wanted to have the same book she did. Potter and Weasley laughed. I got another bruise. I did not cry. I did not go to the Hospital Wing to have the bruise salved. Promfrey would've noticed that it wasn't my only bruise. My arm is still not totally healed.

I asked Granger or I could have it after she had read it. She looked at me like I was mad. I must be.

She's a Mudblood.

Why would she be a Mudblood? There are more muggles in this world. They all get children. She's got magic, so what? I do too. I haven't called her that since Christmas, or even before that. They do not notice. I do not exist in their little world of love. They should grow up. There's no love in this world. I haven't seen anything that can be called love. Most parents love their children. Mine slap me.

If I'm in their way, or I mistreathed them. Or when I didn't mistreath my pet. Or the house-elves. I met Dobby in the kitchens, not long ago. He refused to help me. No shock there. I tried to make it up to him but it didn't work. It wouldn't work with me if my parents would try to make it up to me. Not possible. At all. The making up, I mean. And me forgiving them.


We played Gryffindor. They won. How the hell am I supposed to catch a snitch while my arm is half-broken?

The Quidditch team tried to make me pay. I got detention for hexing every single one of them.

It's strange, how you can stand up against one person and you let the other person do anything to you.

Weasley had to rub it in my face that they won.

"Malfoy, couldn't see the snitch trough your ferret eyes?" he asked.

"Congratulations, Weasley" I only said, then once again went up to the Owlery.


I'm there now. In the Owlery.

Ares is helping me with making a song. I'll probably never sing it. But it's nice to get away from the rest for awhile. Ares is the only one who understands me. He normally hides in the forest close to our house, but he's the only one who knows what I look like after every holiday.

He's got a girlfriend. It's a white snow owl. Her white feathers stand out against his black, but they seem both very happy. She let me stroke her. I know her from somewhere, but I'm not sure from where. I'm happy for him. I told him she'd better be from some half-blood or something. I see enough pure-bloods as it is.


I went home for the Easter holiday. I had to. I walked away though. He beat the hell out of me. I'm never going back. I'm roaming London now. Muggle London. I will not take any risks. I shrunk my trunk. I'm not sure if I'm going back to Hogwarts. Ares is flying with me sometimes. He goes to his friend more then often. I wonder if the other owner knows already.

My father threatened me in a letter. I ripped it. It was full of bullshit about pure bloods and the Dark Lord. I'll never have the Mark. Never.

I'm limping after the last beating and a few street urchins tried to rob me. I defended myself. No wand included. I just hit them. A few punches and they were gone.

I feel bad about it now. I hit them, like Lucius hit me.

They will manage. They will live. They know it's hard, even though they live on the street and I didn't for years. I am now, though. I steal food from shops. It's easy using magic.


"Malfoy? What happened to you?" Potter asks.

I raise an eyebrow: "What are you talking about, Potter? I just went home for the holidays, like I almost always do. I've gotten more presents then normal, that's all."

"You're limping."

"I know" I answer and then make my way to the Slytherin table. I sit down on the end, ignoring all the filthy looks trown my way. Of course Lucius would make sure the whole of Slytherin House knows that I'm disinherited. Pansy won't touch me. So something good came from the beating after all. She called me a bloodtraitor. I told her I'd rather be a bloodtraitor then a proud pure-blood kneeling to kiss a half-bloods robes. She tried to attack me. And left with purple hair and clothes a few seconds after. I won't hit a girl. I won't sink so low.


Madam Promfrey tried to drag me to the Hospital after dinner. The Headmaster asked me for a conversation. I refused. I'm not weak. I've looken after myself all my life. I won't need someone to start when it's over.

I've almost stopped limping now. Every thing went back to the way it was, except that the Slytherins don't want anything to do with me. Weasley thinks it's all an act to get in Potter's good grace because I'm a Dead Eather. I told him I wasn't. He wanted me to prove it by showing me my left fore arm. I refused. Everyone thinks I'm a Death Eater now. Only the Slytherins don't. Pansy asked Lucius if I was. When she cornored me with the stuff she found out, all lies from Lucius, of course, she told me she'd never would touch me again, not to think about marriage. I made a dance in the corridor, then hexed her, before she hexed me.

It will be soon the end of the school year. I'll pass with better grades then I've ever had. I had no Pansy to keep on bugging me to stop studying. I had best grades for Potions, Astronomy and COMC. No one believed it really. Granger cried. And of course, the Gryffindors blamed it on me. I just smiled and started pondering on where to stay for the holidays.


"Draco!" I hear someone say. I turn to see who it is. Hardly anyone calls me Draco anymore. 'Bloodtraitor', 'Slytherin scum' and 'Malfoy' are the most used. I'm not a Malfoy any longer, though.

It was Professor Sinistra. One of the only teachers who calls me that, instead of Mr Malfoy. One of the reasons I work so hard for her class.

"Yes, Professor?" I ask.

"You are disowned aren't you? With whom are you staying in the holidays?"

I shrug: "Probably Ares and the street rats" I answer, in an attempt to joke.

Malfoys don't joke. That's why I try.

She doesn't laugh, she frowns. "You have no where to go?"

"No one wants a bloodtraitor" I answer: "The Gryffindors, Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs could care less about me, and the Slytherins see me as scum. I've got no family. So..."

"Why were you disowned in the first place?" she asked, starting to walk with me towards the Owlery.

"I wasn't disowned really, I ran away from home. Then I was disowned."

"Why did you ran away? Did you have problems with your parents?"

"I hate those people" I say, before I think about it: "They are no longer my parents."

"What happened?"

"I don't want to talk about it" I answer.

She nods: "I was thinking, Draco. How about you stay at my place over the summer? It's in the middle of London, no one will think about it and you'll still be close to your friends the street rats."

I stop abruptly: "Did you just invite me into your house?"

"Yes, I think I did."

"You do know that the chance is very big my father will try to find me, don't you?"

"I do" she says, and winks at me: "That's why I'm inviting you over. On the streets you've got more chance to get caught."

"That's right, but I don't care, I don't want you to get hurt."

"No one know I live there" she said: "According to the school I live in Austria."

"Why there?"

"I come from Australia, and Austria looks like it" she answers, eyes twinkling.

I smile: "Okay. But you will save yourself and not me."

"Deal" she says and we shake hands. I say goodbye to her at the door of the Owlery and enter.