"Come now, Benjamin," Sebastian quipped as he hoverscooted down the hallway leading to the Champ Team Hangar. "We have maintenance on the Zoids to finish up. We need to get the Hel Digunner and Stealth Viper outfitted properly for the next battle."
"You don't need to tell me twice," the taller robot muttered. As he rounded the next corner with his robo-companion, he jumped in surprise. "Why look, it's Harry!"
"Yes," Sebastian replied. "My sensors must be malfunctioning; I wouldn't think he'd be back so soon..."
"No, he's definitely there, mine are perfectly operational."
Indeed: There he was, crouched on the sofa in the middle of the hangar. He wore a hollow expression, lifting the teacup to his lips, hands quivering, tea spilling over the side and dripping onto his lap. Harry paid the dampness no heed, instead, mulling over the events of the prior evening in his head.
"The pants, Harry. Lose 'em. NOW."
"Yes, my honey..."
"YES! AH, YES! C'MON, HARDER! FASTER! YOU CALL YOURSELF A MAN!?"
"HARRY!"
The Man Destined to be King threw his arms up in the air and uttered a feminine shriek, his teacup crashing to the floor and splitting right down the middle. He spun around to see Benjamin and Sebastian standing behind him, robo-hands on robo-hips.
"Oh, it's just you guys," Harry said, breathing a sigh of relief.
"What's wrong, Harry?" Sebastian inquired.
"You look so pale and traumatised," Benjamin observed.
"Nothing is wrong!" Harry asserted.
"And why should anything be wrong," Benjamin drolled inquisitively. "At long last you've won over your love. At long last, Leena is all yours!"
"Come on, Harry, tell us the truth," Sebastian said. "You should be gallivanting about, rambling on endlessly about your darling Leena and savouring your 'ultimate victory' like you have been doing... almost CONSTANTLY... for the past few months. But instead, you look utterly pathetic, like all the life was just drained out of you. Tell us, master, what did that wretched succubus do to you?"
Harry drew in a deep breath. And then, the tears flowed freely in anime-esque torrents.
"Oh, SEBASTIAN! Last night... Leena and I, we... well, we made love for the first time."
"I understand that sexual intercourse is supposed to be a pleasurable experience for you humans," Benjamin stated flatly.
"It was... it was... so emasculating," Harry sobbed. "Oh, you guys wouldn't BELIEVE the crazy, weird, kinky, messed up things that woman is into!"
"I am not surprised," Sebastian sighed.
"She was so rough! So aggressive! So domineering! And tireless, she wouldn't let up! I saved myself for her, for all these years... and she took my manhood! Tore it from me and bound it in chains and leather straps and whipped it into submission! I will carry the emotional scars of her passion for the rest of my life!"
"There, there, master," Benjamin cooed.
"Hold me!", Harry cried, and flung himself into his servants' cold, mechanical arms. Benjamin and Sebastian patted him on the back and squeezed him in a maternal robo-hug as he bawled his princely eyes out. When he was finished, he stood up, sniffled, and cleared his throat.
"It was the most amazing thing EVER!"
Benjamin and Sebastian simply stared on in disbelief as the Man Destined to be King marched away, platform shoes splashing through puddles of his own tears, the passion for his beloved stronger then ever before.
