Crystal: so apparently the Microsoft 2007 version is now harder to download for free then it was years ago and so they let me use it for a limited number of times now. So I have a new story for you guys

Warnings: includes genderbent of homestuck characters. This happens during the medieval times, but it will have some things from the future you'll notice. Rated M for some dark themes, and lots of action and fighting as well as kissing, lemons, and such

Pairings: Davex Fem!John, DirkxJake, JanexRoxy, RosexKanaya, JadexKarkat, etc. more will be added later

P.s. you might find the characters a bit Oc but just know it's on purpose. THERE IS REFERENCES TO THE LEGEND OF ZELDA or you will find that a lot of the things that will happen are based on the plot of OOT

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN HOMESTUCK OR TLZ

Chapter one: The Royal Brat

It was a bright morning in the sburb kingdom and David aka Dave Strider woke up in a rush. Well it so happened today was his knight commencement ritual, and it just so happened that he was late and needed to get across castle town to reach the castle. "Shit, shit, shit!" Dave hissed as he hurried for his red tunic and brown boots and passed a hand through his ash blonde hair. He reached for his sword shielding it in its leather compartment. He grabbed a leather bracelet from the table and placed it around his wrist.

It had a special meaning to him and he smiled looking at his name encrusted in rubbies. The only thing he would remember was the girl with black hair he had fallen in love with that he had been searching for, for many years, but still hadn't been able to find her, and he sighed continuing his hurry. He grabbed his shades (sue me for the shades during this time). People were very superstitious during this time and so Dave would no doubt get hung for his red eyes.

He ran out in a hurry as he bumped into everyone through the fruit stands and hasty sellers announcing crappy weapons. He spotted the castle which was made of grand bluish marble. The gates were huge and of shiny black color with the outline of the princess was the seal on the front of them, but no clear features. Dave pushed into the castle as he heard the trumpets and music inside playing. Which meant one thing: he was screwed if his brother noticed he was late. After all, his brother was the head of the royal military and the one accepting the knights.

He would especially be mad since he was the one who trained him for this day. He ran in the knights already in their lines. "Who are you and what are you doing here, kid?" one of them asked. Most of the knights were between 25-30 years old so of course they would be surprised by a 16 year old teen trying to be a knight.

"I'm here for the commencement, problem or what bro?" Dave said calmly. The trainee knights stared before bursting into a fit of laughter. "Hear that guys the kid wants to be a knight. Why don't you play with marbles kid!" the first one had laughed hysterically. Dave remained emotionless and ignored them as he stood up straight in his position. He had this keen instinct to sense his brother from anywhere and just as if in cue he entered the room. The head knight was named, Dirk Strider. He had blonde hair and orange eyes.

No one knew it, but Dirk was having an affair with the king himself. King Jake had married to Queen Jane and had a child to hide his feelings for his first knight. Jane knew and completely accepted it. The Queen also hid her dark secret for she had an affair with, Dirk's childhood friend Roxy, the queen's first maid of honour. All of them had fallen in love since they were kids about 5 years old.

Now you see Jane was the princess of the sburb kingdom back then, and Roxy was her first maid of honour. Jake at the time was a prince from another kingdom that was tightly connected with them and so he was assigned to marry Jane. It wasn't until they were both 16 that they would be married off to rule the kingdom together. As Jake was a prince, his father, assigned him his first knight, Dirk. That's when the four began to finally commence their friendship and the beginning of thier innocent love began.

It wasn't until two years later at 7, that the four had taken their innocent love and confessed their feelings and they were happy. It was so zappy that these four began as friends and continued to this day, and Dave only rolled his eyes every time Jake and Dirk spoke of their younger years with Jane and Roxy. Now back to the point Dirk coughed once and the knights scrambled to their positions.

"Excuse us, general", they all said in unison. "Why was there something to laugh about?" dirk said sternly. "No sir, it's just this kid here, sir, was saying he was joining to be a knight", the trainee chuckled. "Why in fact, I don't very much like it when my brother is taken so lightly he could beat all of you without even trying. He's already been chosen by the king as the princess's first knight. You all are therefore leveled down to guards", dirk dismissed them as all of the new guards looked angry at the guard who had started it all.

As they all left, Dirk punched Dave in the arm. "I noticed you were late, little man", dirk grinned. "I'm sorry dude, but anyways I'm sure the king is waiting for you", Dave smirked. Dirk rolled his eyes and pulled Dave through the garden into just outside Princess's personal garden. It was magnificent full of shining light with its borders full of crystalline water and a tiled marbled path around the many beautiful roses, tulips, lily's and so many more flowers with butterflies in different colors flying around. There were three steps at the end that served to lead to a glass window to observe the throne. Dirk suddenly cursed.

"What?" Dave asked. "You do realize you're missing the most important thing of the garden which is the princess who in fact isn't here!? Shoot she's sneaked out again", dirk sighed. Dave blinked, but said nothing as Dirk lazily dragged him to the throne room. The king sat on his throne chair arguing with his wife playfully. Jake had bright green eyes and black hair sort of messy and pair of squared hipster glasses with his red king robe and green long tunic. His wife, Jane, had thin light blue glasses over big light blue eyes and a turquoise gown. Oh yeah did Dave forget to think about the other peculiar thing in the situation chaos in the kingdom?

Well it seems Dirk, Jane, Jake, and Roxy are all 23, but the princess is 16. Hmm...If you think about it there is no way to conceive a child at what? 7!?The thing is the princess isn't actually conceived naturally. Dave was told Jake and Jane asked the wizards to mix their genes together and created a child they could no doubt look like them. They had the feelings of their partners to consider. Anyways going back with the subject at hand; we had the problem with the princess. "Jake!" dirk yelled entering the room and startling both of them "What is it?" Jake asked worried.

"The princess has sneaked out of the castle again", Dirk crossed his arms. "Dear Gog, Jane what will we do with her?" Jake sighed. "Oh please dear Jake we have to find her first. It deems that sir Dave has his first task of caring for our beloved princess. Oh please, Dave, do find her", Queen Jane pleaded. Dave nodded. "Don't worry I'll find her", Dave said running out. "That girl is so mischievous just like you", Jane grinned to Jake.

~~xXXx~~

In reality, Dave was displeased with his first task. "Why do I have to find the brat?" Dave wondered. He imagined her already. He'd always thought the princess was fat and ugly with a pig nose. He shivered and it would only be time before he met her. He went through the forest of trees leading to castle town and heard something nearby and hid. He heard pants and running small steps. A girl came running by. By the looks of her clothing, she must have been a peasant girl. She had a light blue dress like skirt with a brown vest tied with laces over a quartered sleeve long white shirt. She had pitch black hair, but he couldn't see her face.

She had a brown clock covering her shoulders and head as she ran away from some terrifying looking creatures that Dave had never seen before. She looked back and didn't react fast enough to the branch in front of her and rolled on her side to the floor. "Shit", she hissed as she had twisted her ankle. The creatures chuckled evilly getting close to her. "Give it to us", they demanded. "Never!" she yelled jumping forward and kicking them. They jumped at her, and she punched them square in the jaw. Dave noticed her voice was angelic and musical and thin.

He was surprised at how skilled she was at fighting. They threw her back and she hit her head and held it in her arms. They were about to throw themselves at her when Dave jumped in slicing both creatures with his Katana in half and they dissipated.

Dave turned to the girl and was mesmerized by her beauty. Her skin was peach except for the slight mud marks on her cheeks, her eyes looked black, but it was the cloak that made them look like that. "Are you okay?" Dave asked. She nodded, but said nothing before running away with a limping ankle. That was some girl he hoped to see again. She was truly one of a kind. "Well that was enough gratitude for me", Dave shrugged.

He searched the whole castle town and did not find her and he went to the castle feeling defeated. The king seemed to be scolding someone and so did Jane which meant the princess was found or either came back on her own. He entered slowly as he saw the princess with her back to him. She had her arms crossed, a very good sign that she wasn't taking the scolding very well. She wore a sort of sky blue colored gown with the sleeves leaving her shoulders exposed. "Joanne, you can't keep escaping from the castle. You can really get hurt", Queen Jane scolded. "I can take care of myself!" the girl whined. Her hair was as black as night and was in waves or sort of curls, but either way it looked super soft and silky.

"Ahh, dear, we finally got you your first knight. Dave, meet Joanne", Jane smiled. Princess Joanne turned around and immediately both of their expressions were of shock. It was the peasant girl! Dave got a clear look at her this time. She had bangs going to the left side of her face as a silver tiara rested atop her head. Her eyes were as blue as the ocean itself and she was just breathtaking.

"You!" they both yelled in unison. "You two have met?" King Jake asked. "Yeah, she had been in-", Dave began saying, but Joanne covered his mouth. "Uhh, yeah we saw each other briefly, but we didn't think of it too much", Joanne giggled nervously. Jane and Jake looked at each other and shrugged. "Just go to your room young missy, you're grounded and Dave please begin your duty. You'll bring your stuff to move in with the princess", Jake smiled.

"Wait what?" Joanne asked. "He has to protect you so he's moving in to the bed we reserved in your room for when this day came", Jane nodded. Joanne frowned, "I'm a teen and nonetheless a girl, mother".

"Oh, he's sir Dirk's brother dear, no need to worry", Jane chuckled. Joanne sighed and walked up the stairs and once they were in one of the grand halls Joanne turned around to face Dave. "You will not speak of what happened", Joanne demanded. "As long as I protect you then we have a deal", Dave grinned. "I can take care of myself", Joanne countered. Suddenly Dave grabbed Joanne's wrist and pushed her against the wall completely catching Joanne off guard.

Dave inched his face just centimeters away from Joanne's face. "I could have my way with you and no one would believe you", Dave whispered huskily in her ear. Joanne shivered and her eyes remained wide. Dave inched closer and before he suddenly let her go smirking in triumph. Joanne blushed furiously before pushing him, "you insolent boy! I'm the princess you, and you caught me off guard I can't see right now!" Joanne countered.

Dave raised his eyebrow. "Just open the door and go inside already", Joanne sighed. Dave listened and entered the room. It was nothing like he expected. He expected a pink room, but instead it was blue it had an intricately designed white painted sun on the roof and clouds all over the walls with inscriptions in another language. Her bed had a canopy with blue silk like curtains coming down atop the Egyptian cotton like gold sheets that had the sides in a royal blue color.

She saw her reach around her drawer and pulled out a pair of hipster glasses and a pair of contacts. She placed on the contacts and placed the glasses back inside. She looked at him in a weird way, and he stared back at her. Before anything else she diverted her eyes as Dave continued to analyze the room.

She had a light blue chest with gold border and a big mirror with a white marble table and a cushioned white chair. The room was enormous enough to fit the royal banquet hall inside. The outlines of the room were all done in gold as well as curly Q designs on the roof and the clouds. Across from the blue bed lay his bed, a complete contrast of the room. It was all red, a doing of his brother he knew. What he didn't expect was two hurried girls dropping the princess on the floor.

"Ow, Jane! Rose!" Joanne shrieked. Strangely one of the girls looked similar to Jake but she was obviously a maid of honour by the looks of her simple lime green gown and her pointed hat a top her head. She had a pair of round glasses like Jane's in lime green, but her eyes were like Jake's in emerald green. The only thing that made her look a tiny bit unattractive was the under bite of two teeth she had. The other girl looked…different. She wore a fuchsia colored dress and hat, and her eyes were a strange pink shade, with her lips colored light black shade. Her blonde hair was short and to her shoulders.

"Jojo, you had us worried sick. Today was supposed to be the time for you to begin your dance classes. You're father has met with the kings of the other kingdoms and they have agreed to bring their sons to see who is worthy of milady's hand", Jade said excitedly. Joanne paled, "M-marriage…I don't want to", she mumbled dejected. "Princess…jojo…forget about it. You're a princess and you have to be married off", Rose soothed. Joanne sighed, "I want to go to the prairie. Let's go, Dave", Joanne said standing up with an obvious annoyance at her parents decision

Jade turned to look at Dave. She hadn't notice him and she absolutely thought he was handsome. "He's a cutie. I bet you like him", Jade giggled in Joanne's ear. Joanne instinctively blushed and she shook her head fast. "N-no, of course not", she countered, but all that went into her mind was what happened a few minutes ago. How their bodies were so close and his lips almost touching hers. She was curious about what the color of his eyes were and she wanted to know. She blushed darker with her thoughts and she stood hastily.

"Anyways let's go", she laughed nervously. "Uhh, Dave?" Joanne said nervously as they headed down the stairs. Dave turned to her expectantly. "Thank you…for today", she whispered. When he grinned raising up a brow, Joanne huffed and shoved him running the rest of the way down the steps. Dave groaned. He didn't like this brat at all he doubted he ever will, but he would try to tease her for his own entertainment he guessed. And at the same time all Joanne was thinking was what a torture it would be to deal with such an encumbrance that a personal knight was. But even then a blush couldn't escape from either of their cheeks.

Crystal: well that's it for now…please feel free to review