Chapter 1 A Deep Terrifying One-Sided Love

"Do you have any idea how long we've been sitting here?"

"No…I'm trying to enjoy myself, unlike you."

"This is boring though! Come on Ludwig! Let's go out drinking or something!"

Ludwig folded his newspaper and stood up glaring at Gilbert. He sometimes wished his brother would be more like him. The only things Gilbert enjoyed were war and drinking. Gilbert looked up at Ludwig wondering what he was staring at. "Hey, come on let's go out drinking? Are you still too busy with Feliciano?" Gilbert said frowning. Ludwig sighed. "Fine, I'll go out drinking with you, but after that we're going straight home." Gilbert smiled. The two brothers walked out of the house, Gilbert hoping not to run into Feliciano on the way there.

Ludwig didn't mind spending time with his brother, he just found him a little immature at times. He watched Gilbert sit next to him, taking a sip of beer every few seconds. A smile remained on Gilbert's face. He was happy to be doing something with his brother. After all of that worthless time he spent with Feliciano. In the end Gilbert got the sore end of the deal. He now lived with his younger brother. He felt like a failure, he had failed his younger sibling. Ludwig had always kept him in check. Gilbert had begun to feel he had done nothing to repay him. That's why he wanted to spend time with him, to try and mend their broken relationship. And of course at the worst of times Feliciano and Lovino. Gilbert gritted his teeth as Feliciano ran over. "Ludwig, how are you?" he asked taking a sit next to him. Ludwig looked at Feliciano and smiled lightly. "I've been fine, how have you and your brother been?" Feliciano smiled and went on about how great things had been going lately, Lovino glaring at Ludwig the whole time. "Feliciano," Lovino started grabbing his brother's arm. "Let's leave now." With that said Lovino began dragging Feliciano away. Feliciano frowned. "I wasn't finished telling my story though brother…" Lovino glared at Feliciano. "Do you think he gives a damn? Besides our boss told us to be back by now." Feliciano frowned and waved towards Ludwig who replied with a slight wave. Gilbert frowned at how close they were and he hardly knew his brother. "Ludwig, why are you and Feliciano so close?" Gilbert asked looking down a slight blush on his cheeks. Ludwig looked at his brother, wondering why he had been acting so strange lately. "What's wrong Gilbert?" Gilbert face turned darker so he resorted to yelling. "Answer my question first!" Ludwig looked almost taken back by the sudden hostility. "Well, we've been in several alliances… we've known each other for a long time."

Gilbert looked up at Ludwig with tears in his eyes. "I've known you longer!" Ludwig frowned and felt guilty that he hadn't realized this. "Gilbert…I"

"You what, why do you always talk about Feliciano, you're not even in an alliance anymore?" Gilbert buried his face in his arms. "I was disband; and forced to live with you. I didn't think it would be all that bad…because I still had you to talk to, to go out and drink with. But you always spent time with Feliciano… why? Why don't you ever spend time with me? Why is he so important?" Ludwig was now feeling completely horrible. "I'm sorry Gilbert; I just thought our personalities seemed to differ so much that –"

"That what, that it was okay to leave Gilbert all by himself? No one to talk to too, no one to relate too? It wasn't all you do is read all day or say you're going out to visit Feliciano… I don't have those freedoms anymore. I can only go out if I'm with you… I decide nothing. Ludwig…I'm alone!" Tear streamed down Gilbert face as looked at Ludwig. Ludwig grabbed his brother and tried his best to treat him the way he would have treated Feliciano…no the way he should have been treating him. Gilbert was right, Ludwig had left him alone. Ludwig began to tear up a little too, not because he was sad, but he would get his brother back. "Gilbert I'm sorry that I'd done this to you. I promise…" Ludwig said grabbing his older brother's hands. "I'll never leave you alone that again." Gilbert smiled lightly his eyes still swelled up with tears. Gilbert hugged his brother, smiling widely know. 'Brother,' he thought 'I hope you keep your promise, I also hope, Feliciano doesn't interfere.'

When Ludwig and Gilbert reached their house again that night, they were on the best of terms. Gilbert felt so much better knowing that he wouldn't be alone anymore. Those years had been like torture. Gilbert had realized he couldn't live without interaction with others. He was curious though if Ludwig would truly keep his promise. Thinking about the worst case scenario made him feel sick so he avoided it as well as he could. The only thing was that thought never escaped his mind. It was almost as though he knew what Ludwig said was a lie. But right after he thought that he knew he had to have told the truth. Gilbert wasn't sure what he truly thought and what he wanted to believe. "Ludwig, do you really mean your promise, never again?" Ludwig smiled. "Of course, why would I lie to you?"

Ludwig didn't want to upset his brother by telling him he still had feelings for Feliciano, so he would keep quiet. He would try and make his brother feel as loved as possible. Ludwig wasn't sure how long he could go without seeing Feliciano's forever smiling face, but he would try and manage for his brother. Maybe he could pick up some reading habits if they spent more time together.

Gilbert felt uneasy, due to what fact he didn't know. Maybe it was an instinct, "don't trust the smiling nice guy", but when ever he thought of that phrase a picture of Feliciano showed up. That only made him more uneasy. Did his brother even love him? He just didn't know anymore. He wanted him to feel the same way he felt, but… for some reason it felt one-sided. What was he suppose to do?