Disclaimer: If I owned FFXIII, I wouldn't be writing this derpy stuff.
A/N: I think this is an AU. Possibly just because none of these people actually hang out together. But I felt the urge to write it, and so I am.
Warning. Stupidity ahead.
Of Trains and Noel's Pants
Boarding a train seemed simple enough. Thousands of people did it dozens of times a day, so there was really no reason to be quite so puzzled about it. But, for the group of five young adults standing at the train station, there was something quite amiss. They were grouped off to the side near enough to see the security station, but far enough away that no one would come past asking if they needed help.
They did need help, but not with something good, law-abiding citizens would help them with. And if anyone really did try to further an investigation into exactly what the five were discussing in front of the train station, Lightning Farron could verify that herself and her companions would be immediately reported to the police.
And why?
Between the lot of them, they had a walking armory. Lightning carried her sword, Serah had a bow, Hope had a boomerang (which no one really found dangerous at first), and no one really knew how many knives Noel had on him, in addition to his sword.
In short, they were not getting past the security check and onto a train.
"Hey, none of this is my fault," Snow pointed out.
Lightning gave him a look that clearly said she didn't care.
"Maybe we could just… I don't know, hide them somewhere and get them when we come back?" Hope asked.
"But what if we need them while we're there?" Lightning pointed out.
Serah sighed and pouted. If they kept arguing, they were going to be late and miss the train. "What if we just snuck onto the train?" she suggested. Lightning had that look on her face like she was thinking about the logistics of the entire thing, including exactly how they would get past security, the conductor, and anyone who asked to see their tickets.
"No, that won't be possible. Too many people would get in our way," she said, shaking her head.
"What if you guys all hid them on your person?" Snow asked.
Lightning and Serah glanced down at their miniskirts and sleeveless shirts. "…That's not happening," Serah said. Even if Hope was able to mysteriously rid himself of his boomerang whenever needed, the others couldn't make their weapons disappear into thin air.
Well, Hope couldn't either, but none of them really wanted to ask where he put it.
Despite all that, Hope was the one who came up with a solution. "I've got it!" he announced suddenly, nearly jumping up and down in excitement. It was all too reminiscent of his fourteen-year-old days.
"Got what, your sanity?" Noel asked, grinning teasingly at the scientist, "because I think you might be mistaken on that one."
Hope rolled his eyes at the remark. "No, I've got a place to hide everything."
"And where's that?" The brunette quirked an eyebrow at him. Hope was giving Noel this look like he wasn't going to like the suggestion.
"Your pants."
