A/N: So I had an idea about the blossoming love between a woman and her best friend's tortoise. There will be 8 Days in total, let me know if you would like to read more (potential Rizzles at the end, def some Rizzles feels through out though).
Day One
"So how long can a turtle go without being fed Maura?" Jane asked with a smirk while she studied the image of her best friend's face streaming through her Skype video chat program.
"Longer than you are looking after Bass for Jane, and he's a tortoise, you know this!" Maura let a small smile play at her lips, she knew that her friend was teasing and looking for a rise. "Besides, do you really think I would have accepted you looking after him if you could do any real damage?"
Jane grinned as she sucked down a few mouthfuls of beer before putting the bottle down out of the picture. "How's sunny California Doc?"
Maura eyed her friend suspiciously, "Jane please tell me you are not using Bass as a coaster?"
Jane shook her head vehemently but couldn't help the grin that stayed plastered on her face, "Not at all Maur!"
"I would like to see him please." Her eyes narrowed and her voice was stern.
Jane laughed softly, picked up the laptop and angled it so the built in camera was focused on her best friend's tortoise. Bass was doing his best rock impression, tucked into his shell, with a half full bottle of beer balanced on his back. The shocked gasp she heard come from the computer caused Jane's laughter to become raucous. Putting the laptop back down on the coffee table she shot Maura the most endearing smile she could muster, "I'm teaching Bass to pull his weight, he's no coaster; he's my bartender!"
"Jane!" Maura didn't have any other words in that moment. Part of her brain warned her that Jane was simply mucking around to get a rise, and she had succeeded, but she could ensure not to over react and add to her friend's clear amusement.
"Oh don't worry Maur, Bass and I are getting along just fine. He's even had some strawberries." She retrieved her beer and took another sip, "You ready for your presentation tomorrow?"
Maura smiled suddenly, she had a plan for payback, but only if Jane insisted on being inappropriate with her beloved Bass. It was only fair she warn her friend of the consequences of such behaviour. "Do I have to ask your mother to keep an eye on Bass, Jane?"
The Italian-Bostonian rolled her eyes, "No, no don't do that. I'll cease using him as my bartender. He was a little slow anyway."
Day Two
"Honey I'm home." Jane exclaimed boisterously as she let herself into Maura's house through the side door, switching the kitchen lighting on as she went. When all she heard in return was the silence of the empty house she mumbled, "We need to work on your social skills if this relationship is going to last Bass."
Dumping the Chinese takeaway she had bought for dinner down on the kitchen island she crossed to the fridge and pulled out a beer for herself and a strawberry to give to Bass before she hit the sack. She had already determined he liked them better at room temperature and she really wanted to win over his affections, not that she could honestly determine what they may look like. Dogs, like Jo Friday were easy to understand, they bounced around and jumped all over you and licked you silly; that was affection for them. But what was affection from a tortoise? She'd decided she would settle for him hanging around outside his shell for longer than it took him to eat his treats.
She sat the strawberry down on the island and sat down in front of her food. Halfway through consuming the food from the container (something she would not have gotten away with if Maura had been home) she noticed that Bass had poked his head and limbs out of his shell and started the slow amble from where he had been hiding in the living room to the kitchen. "There you are little guy." Silence. "Fine, don't speak to me then." With a roll of her eyes she went back to her dinner, fairly certain that she was going to have driven herself mad by the time Maura returned from her week long Forensic Sciences Conference in California.
Casting a glance at her watch she decided it might be late enough to catch Maura between the end of the day's conference stuff and the evening's dinner plans. She dug around in her pocket and pulled out her phone, hit speed dial one and waited, an involuntary grin spreading across her face when she heard the medical examiner answer.
"Hello Jane."
"Hey Maur, how was your presentation?" She had managed to complete her mouthful before speaking, an achievement in of itself.
"It went well, thank you for asking. Is Bass alright?"
Jane slapped herself on the forehead in a 'D'oh' moment before remembering that Maura couldn't see her theatrics. "I knew there was something I was forgetting."
"You're sitting in my kitchen eating Chinese from the containers aren't you? So you didn't really forget him at all, did you?" Maura knew it was the night of the week that Jane tended to lean towards Chinese for dinner and she also knew that there was no way she would have gone to an effort to use crockery when she didn't have to. She also knew that as much as Jane liked to play around and joke, she took seriously the job of taking care of Bass.
Jane groaned, "Damnit Maur, stop being so omniscient. You take all the fun out of life."
"It wouldn't hurt you to eat some fruit and vegetables while I am away Jane. You cannot sustain yourself on cheeseburgers, fries, Chinese, pizza, beer and coffee."
"That's what you think." She sipped her beer thoughtfully, "You could just come home you know and make sure I eat something healthy."
Maura laughed at this, "Since when do you listen to me Jane?"
"Well Bass isn't a coaster anymore, so like I listened to you yesterday. Also I am pretty sure at least once a week I eat a disgusting salad because you tell me to, but I am so not doing that if you're not here!"
"I'll see you on Sunday Jane."
Jane pouted and whined, "But that's five whole days away. Do you know how hard it is to get conversation out of your turtle?" She chuckled to herself at this; she would never ever admit Bass was a tortoise in front of Maura.
"I would be concerned if you thought the tortoise was talking back to you. Now finish your meal, feed Bass and get a good nights sleep."
"Yes Ma," Jane responded sarcastically.
"Goodnight Jane."
