A/N: I was originally writing this for my series The Doctor Who Knew Too Much but it kind of took on a life of its own, and I thought it deserved its own posting. Because stories have feelings too you know. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: What's even the point of disclaimers anyway? I never understood them. It's like robbing a bank and then saying, "Oh, don't worry, I'm not making a profit off this- I'm giving all the money away." But, since it seems to be the thing to do... I do nae own Doctor Who!


Jailed!

Rose was not happy.

"This is all your fault!" she said, looking back and pointing her finger at the Doctor.

"Oh, I don't know," he said, stepping up and grabbing the bars in front of them. "Don't you think it's kind of exciting? First time getting thrown into jail and all that?" He raised his eyebrows alluringly.

Rose's angry mask slipped slightly, one corner of her mouth turning up.

"You are so weird!" she said, shaking her head with a smile. Then she grew stern again. "This is still your fault. Why'd you walk out of the store without paying?"

The Doctor looked pensive.

"I guess I just…forgot." He shrugged. "Still, I thought the Psychic Paper would do the trick."

Rose laughed in disbelief.

"It said, and I quote, that we were, 'Two dangerous criminals who must be dealt with'!"

"Hmm…yeah…." The Doctor rubbed the back of his neck. "Wasn't exactly the most helpful thing in the world, was it?"

Rose turned away from him, walking over and sitting on a bench built into the wall of their cell.

"What is my mum going to say?" she said, putting her head in her hands.

The expression on the Doctor's face became one of panic, no doubt imagining just WHAT Jackie would do once she found out who was responsible for getting Rose in jail.

He walked over to Rose and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't worry- I've seen plenty of situations like this on the telly. I know what to do."

He strode confidently over to the bars of their jail cell. Waving a hand to catch the attention of a passing constable he called out,

"Excuse me, kind sir. I believe I am allotted one phone call."

He winked at Rose. She giggled.

The constable stopped. The Doctor looked at him with self-assurance. The constable glanced at his watch, then sighed.

"Alright then. Be quick about it, though," he said in a bored voice, unlocking the cell door and leading the Doctor into the hallway.

As he was being swept off in the direction of the phone, something occurred to the Doctor.

He looked back.

"Rose, who should I call?"

There was a hint of desperation in his voice. Rose stood to answer but he was escorted out of sight before she could respond.

She went back to the bench and leaned her head back against the wall, waiting.

Lost in thought, it was several seconds before she identified the sound echoing throughout the cell.

It was ringing.

Rose sat up. "He wouldn't have…" she said to herself.

Then she cut herself off. "He WOULD have!"

She rushed over to the door of the cell, looking out at the desk where she and the Doctor's personal belongings had been stored. They had been taken away during their initial processing at the station.

The ringing was coming from the desk. Then it stopped.

A short time later, the Doctor was escorted back into the cell, smiling a little nervously.

Rose looked at him.

"You called me." It wasn't a question.

The Doctor didn't say anything. There seemed to be a spot on his sneakers that needed examining.

Rose took a step closer. "You called ME! Even though you knew my phone got taken away when we got here!" She threw her hands in the air. "What am I going to do with you?"

"It was instinct!" the Doctor said defensively. "You don't know what it's like out there! They all stare at you, like you've done something wrong." He sounded affronted.

"You did do something wrong, Doctor!" Rose shouted.

"Well, not really…I mean, it was just…circumstances." He scratched his head.

"Well, the circumstances right now are we're still stuck in here and you've completely wasted our only phone call!"

By this point Rose was about an inch from the Doctor's face. The close distance meant she immediately noticed the change in his expression.

"Why are you smiling?" she asked.

Rose stepped back, a smile appearing on her own face. "Doctor, why are you smiling?"

He looked at her, his grin now reaching magnificent proportions, and said in a sing-song voice, "I've got my sonic screwdriver."

Rose put a hand over her mouth to stop her laugher.

"What? But didn't they take it from your pocket?"

The Doctor stuck his hands in said pockets and struck a nonchalant pose.

"I guess they didn't dig deep enough," he said, then pulled his sonic screwdriver out of his right pocket. "Ta da!"

Rose ran over and gave him a hug. After a short moment she drew back, her smile dimming bit.

"But that still doesn't help us." She began pacing. "They've got our fingerprints. We're in the system. Breaking out now would just put us on the run." She turned and looked at the Doctor.

"I like to run," he said.

"Doctor!" Rose took a step towards him threateningly.

"Just kidding!" The Doctor held his hands up defensively. "Still, you're right," he continued. "We need some plan that will stop them from remembering we were ever here." He tapped the sonic screwdriver thoughtfully against his chin.

"Can't you just erase their memories or something?" Rose asked.

"No," the Doctor said, walking over to the cell door, "You're confusing a sonic screwdriver with a neuralyzer." He bent down and began running the sonic screwdriver over the door's locking mechanism. He went on. "And a neuralyzer's not even a real device! It's from a movie." The Doctor spun around to look at Rose. "Someone's been watching too much science fiction," he said, waggling his sonic screwdriver at her.

"Like you're one to talk!" said Rose, "You're practically a science fiction show in yourself!"

The Doctor ignored her and turned the sonic screwdriver back to the lock. "Ha ha!" he shouted triumphantly as it clicked free. The Doctor opened the door and turned to Rose. "I'm afraid we'll have to do this the old-fashioned way," he told her with mock chagrin. "Follow me!"

Smirking, Rose stepped out after him, giving him a slight push forward.

After picking up their stuff from the desk, the Doctor led Rose a short distance down the hallway. Then he peered around a doorway. Rose crouched beneath him, humming the James Bond theme song softly. The Doctor glared at her.

"Sorry," she whispered. "Seemed appropriate."

The room they were looking into was almost empty. A man sat in front of a computer at the far end of it, headphones in ears.

"Okay," the Doctor said, "I need access to that computer."

Rose looked up at him. "And you need me to distract that bloke?"

The Doctor looked down. "You'll go far in prison," he intoned.

Laughing, Rose got up and entered the room. "Still your fault!" she whispered back to the Doctor.

The Doctor waved her on.

From his position behind the door frame he watched as she tapped the man on his shoulder. He spun around, startled. From this distance the Doctor couldn't quite make out what Rose was saying, but it seemed to involve a lot of gesturing. Suddenly, the man jumped out of his chair and made for the door. The Doctor drew back in what he hoped was a casual position against the wall, but the man didn't even glance at him as he continued down the hallway at break-neck pace.

Rose stood there with a smug expression on her face as the Doctor sauntered into the room.

"What did you say to that poor fellow?" he asked, glancing back towards the hallway.

"Trust me," Rose said, crossing her arms, "You don't want to know."

The Doctor thought for a moment, then nodded.

"You're probably right." He stepped over to the computer. Putting his glasses on, he used the sonic screwdriver to access the computer's main database. For several moments the room was silent except for the sound of keys clacking.

"There!" the Doctor said, leaning back from the computer.

Rose leaned over his shoulder. "Did you do it?"

"Yup. We are officially erased from the database." He stood up and offered his arm to Rose. "Shall we make good our escape?"

She smiled at him and locked arms. "We shall."

As they walked out of the room, Rose gave a fleeting look in the direction of their cell. Then she turned to the Doctor.

"Next time I'm doing the shopping," she said.

The Doctor pursed his lips. "That's probably a good idea."

Arm in arm they walked out of the jail and on to their next adventure.


I had a lot of fun writing this. I think my favorite line is, "You'll go far in prison." It just cracks me up everytime I read it. Is that weird? Anyways, I might turn this into a series, with each chapter having the Doctor and Rose (or some other companion) breaking out of some location. Let me know what you think!