Disclaimer: I'm not sure why people put this here (if someone could tell me that would be great) but I don't own the show House M.D. or any of the characters.
AN: This chapter is a test. I want to see if anyone likes my writing and if this even seems half interesting. I have another half of chapter one still in the works (another day to finish at most) ... I'm trying to make this as close to the feel of an actual episode as possible. I'm also a perfectionist so this whole story may take me a while.
EDIT: Done with the rest of the chapter.. added it below. Please tell me what you think :) Oh yeah, and this is set somewhere after the whole Tritter thing in season 3
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The automatic entrance doors whipped open as Dr. House limped through them into Princeton-Plainsboro Hospital. He glared toward the clinic trying his best not to be seen by Dr. Cuddy. She was turned around talking to a nurse, it was a perfect opportunity to get to his office and hide for a few hours. He sprinted, as best a lame man could, to the elevator and hit the button. He entered along with one other -- an average height, nice looking 20-something female.
As soon as the doors shut she spoke, which caught House slightly off guard, "Have you ever done it with a stranger in an elevator?"
He wasn't sure if he should answer her, was she just making bizarre conversation? He looked at her curiously; she hit the stop button which made the elevator weakly jerk to a halt. She crept up toward him, "Would you like to?"
He thought this was incredibly strange but also thought he shouldn't give up whatever this was, especially since she was young, attractive and, well, female. He shoved her up against the door of the elevator as they begin kissing. She was relaxed against the cold steel of the elevator with his left arm brushing her ear, propping himself up with his hand on the door, the other was still holding his cane.
She shifted and the elevator began to move again, "Oops," She smirked, a slightly evil smirk. He squinted at her, who was this girl? The doors opened and she quickly walked off down the hall, opposite the direction House was going, her high-heeled shoes clicking with every step.
He was in a trance watching her body sway as she walked when, "Daydreaming again, House?" Wilson teased, catching what House was staring at.
"I could have that." House demanded as he started off toward his office. Wilson followed, "We won't get into that argument." House smirked.
"How did you get off clinic duty?" Wilson asked, "I wouldn't think Cuddy would let you off so soon after saving your ass."
"You know Cuddy, she can't say no to this face." House said as he pushed his office door open and flipped the light switch.
"Yea, well, I also know she'll find you eventually." Wilson turned and left the room.
It was only a few seconds before the door swung back open, "HOUSE!" It was Cuddy who wasn't in the best of moods.
"Yes?" House answered the scream, with an exaggerated head jerk in her direction.
"I have two nurses who called in sick this morning and the clinic is overflowing with people who all think they're dying, now you either get your ass down there or I will have you back in jail so fast…" She was cut off by House.
"Calm down, I just came here first for," He slide open his drawer and pulled out a pill bottle, "This." He flipped the bottle up in the air, caught it and put it in his shirt pocket.
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House grabbed the patient's file from the bin on the door and walked in the exam room.
"So what's wrong with you?" He asked the 50-something brunette who was sitting on the exam table.
"Well that's what I was hoping you could tell me." She replied with a smile. House looked at her, slightly annoyed, as he flipped through her chart.
"I've been having mood swings, and I have headaches and some short-term memory problems…" her voice dragged on, but House interrupted.
"Do you have a mother?" He snapped at her.
"Yes. Of course I have a mother, what does…" She was interrupted again.
"Well then you and your mother aren't very close because I would expect a 50 year old woman to either know, or have her mother tell her, that she was going through menopause."
"Oh, I can't possibly be going through…" Again, House stopped her mid-sentence.
"Trouble sleeping?" She shook her head forward,
"Hot flashes?" She shook her head forward,
"No more 'that time of the month'?" She shook her head forward once more, this time it looked like it was all sinking in.
"So, what do I do?" She asked.
"Find a good lip waxer." He said with an obvious tone. She looked at him with big scared eyes.
He sighed and wrote something down on a notepad, ripped it off and gave it to her, "Go talk to a gynecologist."
He left the room and closed the door behind him. He walked toward the nurse's station and dropped the folder he was holding on the stack with the others. He glanced up to see the girl from the elevator walking by; she stopped when her tiny purse fell off of her arm and onto the floor. As she reached down to pick it up, her long blonde hair started flowing off her shoulders toward the front of her face. She flipped it up and over her head as she straightened back up; it all seemed to go in slow motion as House stared. She caught him out of the corner of her eye and whipped her hair around as she faced his direction. She blew him a kiss before she started back off toward the entrance doors of the hospital.
"House," it was Cuddy again, "Stop staring at the Girl Scout and do your job." House turned toward Cuddy and stared intently at her breasts which were almost entirely exposed by her lacy low-cut shirt.
"I think jealousy makes those bigger," House commented. Cuddy smirked at him and turned to be on her way. House grabbed another folder and started flipping through it.
"Gibens?" The nurse called. A mother and son stood up; the son seemed to be early teens, and he was holding his right arm tightly. As they walked toward the nurse the boy stopped. "What is it?" The mother asked, "Is it happening again?" He turned his head toward his mother's voice, "Yea, and this time I can't see at all!"
