Title: Here is Gone
Author: aimalyn xo
Disclaimer: I don't own ER or the characters.
Summary: Ray's POV. Quick tidbits of his thoughts since Neela moved out.
They had a gig that night, but he couldn't concentrate. She had left him, moved out. His Roomie, his best friend.
How could she do that to me?
You and I got something,
But it's all and it's nothing to me, yeah,
And I got my defenses,
When it comes through your intentions for me, yeah.
And we wake up in the breakdown,
With all the things we never thought we could be, yeah.
He's leaving her. They get married and off he goes, back to Iraq. Doesn't he realize how much she is hurting? She left her best friend behind for him and now he just leaves her. Stupid, Gallant. What an idiot.
I'm not the one who broke you,
I'm not the one you should fear,
We got to move you, darlin'.
I thought I lost you somewhere,
But you were never really ever there at all.
Why won't she talk to me? I wasn't the one who left her and never came back. She says she's scared, but of what? I didn't do anything to hurt her. All I did was be there for her.
And I want to get free,
Talk to me.
I can feel you falling,
And I wanted to be
All you need.
Somehow, here is gone.
She's coming around. At least that's what Abby says. She's finally talking to people. Still not me, though. She looks happy, on the outside, but her eyes – they tell a whole other story. Nobody can see it, nobody but me.
I am no solution
To the sound of pollution in me, yeah,
And I was no the answer
So forget you ever thought it was me, yeah.
Gates? Off all people, she had to pick him? Whatever. Apparently, I mean nothing. Open up and talk to him, not your supposed best friend.
And I don't need the fallout
Of all the past that's in between us
And I'm not holding on
And all your lies weren't enough to keep me here.
He's using you! Probably cheating on you, too. But who am I to judge? I'm just the ex-Roomie, I mean nothing.
And I want to be free,
Talk to me.
I can feel you falling.
I won't say I told you so, but it's true. He screwed you over, but I'm going to be mature about it. I'll be here if you want to talk. I'll use every ounce of strength that I have to not hit him, kill him. Deal with it your way, I'll be there.
I know it's out there,
I know it's out there,
And I can feel you falling.
I'll be there, waiting until you need me. You're my best friend. Forever.
I know it's out there,
I know it's out there,
Somehow, here is gone, yeah.
I know it's out there,
I know it's out there,
Somehow, here is gone, yeah.
"It's not gone, Ray. I'm so sorry."
What are you doing in our – my doorway?
"I screwed up, Ray. You're the one I need. You're my best friend. Ray, I love you.
"I love you, too, Neela."
Review please. This is only my second attempt. My first one is still a work in progress.
