A/N: This is the beginning of the sequel to Lover's Respite.
!DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU HAVE YET TO FINISH THE FIRST STORY!
I can't put more emphasis then that, if you choose to read on it WILL spoil the ending of the first story. You've been warned.
Without further ado, I present to you,
Eternal Darkness:
Nothing, in all my years of living, can come close to the bliss that love brought me. No words can describe the feelings in my heart every time I saw her. Such a strange occurrence, feelings, a peculiar vibe that enveloped me every time I touched her. A strange euphoric feeling that would never again grace me with its presence, never again fill me with joy and love.
Someone once told me, that it was better to have loved and lost, then to never have loved at all. At the time, it only made me feel sorry for myself that I fell into the latter, but if the same soul came up to me today and told me that, I'd claw his eyes out for his ignorance.
Ignorance sure is bliss, such a phrase describes the whole situation. The pain of having lost my loved one far outweighed the pain of never having loved. In fact, I was never truly pained without the love I never knew existed. I never found a need to pursue it, because I had everything I could ever want in my past life when I was still clouded in ignorance. So many people rush out into the world looking for love, the sad thing is they don't realize the consequences for their actions.
Once you love, there is no going back. A piece of you is forever lost within that person, no matter what kind of break up you go through. People in this world don't realize that love is a double-edged sword and it cuts both ways. It's a ticking time bomb of pain that winds up tighter and tighter as the years go on. Both you and your lover wind it up, until one day, when one leaves the other, the unfortunate one that lives on is forever scarred, withering away in pain until the end of its life, death being the final end of the pain.
Truth is, I loved her. I loved her with all of my heart. There was never a moment in the whole alloted amount of time that we were together that I didn't have the most exuberant feeling of warmth, of love and closeness. It was truly the best thing that I've ever experienced. To think that anyone can ever find the words to explain it would berate it altogether.
Love works in such ways. It may take everything that you held dear, everything that you treasured in your past life, anything that may hold meaning to you and destroy it. It may cause heartache beyond any feasible amount of physical pain, and it may cost beyond what you can afford, but the truth is, no matter what trials and tribulations it puts you through, love was worth it.
Love was worth it. It was worth more that my life itself. I put a much higher value on her than I do myself, and yet, once she left... Was it still worth it?
Nothing is worse than having what you love stripped away. There is no greater pain than losing what your heart treasures most. That's why people die for it, and kingdoms fall in its name. Love may have a very broad definition and range, but in every situation the meaning behind the word is more valuable than any amount of money, or any amount of physical, tangible, or otherwise obtainable objects.
Yet even though it's worth is so much, it remains the most mysterious thing that makes up and defines the world we live in. Love by its nature is relative, making it by far the most hardest thing to define, or put words on. In itself, it can create a world any creature can be satisfied in, or destroy the existence of another. It can be the very best thing in existence, but it cuts both ways, and can lead to the destruction of one's own world.
Death is by far the most cruel salvation in this world. Even though Jewel shall never feel pain, hurt, or suffer in any way possible, it left me alone. It caused more pain, more heartache than anything I ever thought imaginable.
And it used Love as it's weapon.
My hollow was bare. Sleep, the only salvation from the waking nightmare that I was cast in, only lasts so long. This near death state was the closest thing I could do to be near her, and as strange as it was, it only served to aid me in forgetting her.
How could I forget her? Why would I ever want to? Why are such futile thoughts confiding within my mind?
I don't have the answers, the only thing I have now is pain. The only thing I know now is pain. Pain is my world now, and heartache is it's accomplice.
Pedro and Rafael once came by seeking to comfort me, but I casted them aside. My own friends, the ones who once brought happiness to me, betrayed me. They tried to convince me to move on from her, the jewel of my life, my love, my existence...
I can no longer go to any being in this world now, they are all against me. If I tried to seek refuge and comfort in them, they would only try to sever the gap between me and Jewel even more. I was betrayed by the very world I resided in.
Society itself turned against me. Strange thing about society, if you don't conform to its standards, you become its enemy. I don't mind, I'll be the enemy of the very thing that took Jewel away from me. I'll be the one in the darkness and solitude of my own mind, my own world.
The day dragged on, and eventually my stomach needed sustenance to fuel my existence within this conscious world. I hated such mundane tasks, such trivial things as searching for food. It forced me to take my mind off her, causing me to betray my unwavering love.
Why would I need to stay in this world anyways? I thought as I landed on a mango tree.
Mango... This was her favorite.
It's taste, now bitter in my beak, only served as a painful reminder of once was.
Jewel... Why'd you leave me? Why'd you cast me into the abyss as you departed into your own sanctuary? Did you not love me as much as I loved you?
A strange feeling washed over me as I finished up my meal, turning around I saw a crow. A black crow with dark, deep red eyes. It's stare pierced my very being, reading me like a book. I stood there with no emotion on my face, but the presence of such an ominous being scratched and clawed at the very fiber of my current sanity.
I needed answers. There was something this crow knew that I didn't, and the ever weird fact that crow was all the way out in Rio de Janeiro only further fueled my curiosity.
"You're not like the others..." The crow called out in a cold, straight tone, "Yes... The pain you've undergone, its unfathomable."
How dare he? How didn't he know the pain I was in?
"What do you mean?" I called back, anger filling me up suddenly.
"You seek answers, a new meaning to your life. I can see it inside you." The dark being said, ever intensifying his gaze.
Our eyes met, and there was nothing more I wanted to do then to interrogate the strange being, to tear him apart and look for answers.
Fate would have no such thing, for once I blinked, in that split second of weakness and of dropped guard, he vanished. Gone with the wind.
Shout of to AlexTheCrow for use of his OC during this project.
This was something I had been thinking about for a long time. I wanted to set the stage, a prelude of sorts, to the infamous sequel. I had a notepad of ideas on what to write the first chapter that I kept adding to, to the point where I couldn't help but write this out. So it should be no surprise I wrote the entirety of this short beginning in under an hour. I have no idea when it will be updated, but hopefully this will build some excitement for it. (I'm going to focus more on the short stories until I know full well where I'm taking this story, but this is going to be quite the Grimdark story.)
As always, leave a review. They drive me on and on to write more and more, so fuel the fire!
