BROKEN HEART

10 years ago

Rin still in elementary school. Something happen when some of the student mocking him and his brother, Yukio…

" why is that child is still here? He is monster itself….. "

"they should already remove him from these school…"

"we don't need a delinquent in here. Please stay out of here…"

All of those words always resonate in my mind. How nii-san can stand with all these problems? It's not his fault for him can't control his emotion. But, they deserved to get it, because they mocking with us…

However, nii-san never shows to us how his feeling is. He always smiles and never cries although he get serious injuries from fighting with others child, although everyone hate him and leave him alone. He just too small to endure all of that's, but he was strongest person that I ever known. But, see him alone enduring all the pain actually hurting me the most. I only hope….

15 years later

"..You are Satan's son! Don't ever stay near to us…"

"..Please just disappear from our sight…"

"…don't ever call us your friends…"

However, as time passed, things began to change. Nii-san always the boisterous and happy person. He was brash, loud, hardheaded, stubborn, and stupidly kind to a fault. That's why, when Rin came in to exorcist cram school with his head down and his blue eyes unseeing to the things around him, everyone worried. He decides to sit alone in the class, while Shiemi still in confusing thought. Not only Shiemi, but all of the students in the Cram class still can't accept the truth of him.

"Rin…" Shiemi tried, "are you okay?"

The class, with their eyes glued on to the scene in front of them, held their breaths. The boy's dejected aura rolled off him in depressing waves, but Rin, ever the fool, only tried his hardest to give the blonde girl a weak smile.

"…I'm fine, Shiemi…" he said gently, voice quiet and empty of their usual bubbly happiness.

It's very obvious that he is lying. Bon frowned deeply at what he was seeing. It wasn't like the stupid boy to be so fake, but when he was about to chew the kid out the door opened and Rin's twin, Yukio, walked in.

The green blue landed on his older brother and Yukio could only blink where he stood, one cursory look giving him everything he needed.

"Nii-san look really emptied. Just what the hell is happened to him? "Yukio thought.

"Nii-san, what's happen? Could you tell me what had been troubled you now? It's doesn't feel like you in these class", said Yukio.

However, Rin still looking down to the desk, it feels like he is searching an answer written on the table. Then, he faced to his twin brother.

"It's nothing happened to me. I'm just feeling tired from Shura's training. Don't worry about me. Just teach us already, Yukio" said Rin with wide smile on his face. A smile that shine our days and it full of love and warmth. However, nothing can escape from his brother sight. Rin's eyes fill with sadness, loneliness, afraid and depressed. The light in his eyes become dull and there only dark blue with no emotion expressed. It's the same expression he showed after his secret had been discovered to the public, that he's Satan's son, inherits the same blue fire as their father. Yukio know that Rin still like before, take all of his problems by himself and engulf itself. It's really brave action but still stupid thing to do alone.

"Alright," he said at the end of class, "please remember to review your lessons from today and I'll see you all tomorrow. And Okumura-kun, please wait for a while."

Everyone had hesitated, glancing at Rin, before they all stood, Shiemi casting worried looks over her shoulder as she walked away.

"Nii-san," Yukio spoke when the last of his students walked out, "what happened?"

"Please Nii-san; at least just tell me what had bothered you all of these days? It's doesn't seem like yourself. Don't burden yourself. Furthermore, I'm your brother, family and your friend."

Rin still in silent mode, but his hand is shaking vigorously. It seem like he is holding something that too burden to endure by himself.

Yukio placed his hand on Rin's head and rub the navy blue softly. "Nii-san…."

The older of the two stood up, face lowering into the shadows of his hair as he made his way over to his twin. Yukio didn't say anything when he found himself with an armful of his older brother, only choosing to hug back just as tightly, burying his face into Rin's soft navy locks as he waited.

"Yukio….Do I deserved in these worlds? Do I need to disappear now? I'm just too stupid to think about that. It just t…too h…hard for me." his voice crack. Rin shook his head in the embrace, arms tightening when Yukio felt the first signs of the warm tears seeping through his clothes.

"Nii-san…What make you think like that's? Just tell me, why you have to disappear? Don't let yourself dove in these meaningless emotion. You already know that all of us love you. You deserve to live here."

He swallowed, and then his voice finally trembled. "Because I was afraid of what would happen to us if I didn't! If I had my emotions in mind, I wouldn't be able to protect all of you as I was meant to do; if I had emotions in mind, I could control my own demonic powers! But then again, I was also afraid I'd render myself unable to feel a single thing... Don't you get it, Yukio? It's... it's not that I'm angry at you: I'm angry at myself all the time because I'm afraid all the time! I'm always, always afraid and no matter what I do... I can't make it go away. And... and I'm afraid of losing the only family I have left... I don't want you and others suffered because of me. You already see that's night, right? I….i almost kill you, Yukio! It's make me fell….."Rin won't able to continue. He just tightens his grip onto Yukio's jacket and crying more.

"I'm …afraid, Yukio. Please, don't leave me alone."

Yukio still embraced him again, still reeling and in awe of Rin's confession. He already knows that his brother never hurt him. And, he know that Rin are really fragile and childish, which only he know that.

"Nii-san..."

Yukio flung his arms around Rin and hug him with love and warmth to him as if Rin were about to disappear. Rin was crying inconsolably, reciting a string of apologies into Yukio's chest. Holding his brother tightly, Yukio said next to Rin's ear the words Yukio knew his nii-san had been waiting to hear his entire life.

"There's nothing to be afraid of. It doesn't matter if you once again lost control and tried to hurt me, because I know and believe that you never ever try to hurting me, Nii-san. It doesn't matter how many times you hurt and depressed, because I'll be there to comfort you. Whenever you sick and broken, I always there to cure and loving you. "

Yukio took Rin's tear-stained face into his hands and, half-smiling, he said, "And it sure as hell doesn't matter if you're weak or if you fall, because I'll be there to make you stronger and pick you up so you can keep on marching. You're not weak at all, Rin; in fact, you're my strong and courageous brother. You also know that I can't live without you. You are my very precious family and person. I really love you, Nii-san."

Then, Yukio closed their gap by kissing Rin's lip to comfort him and tell Rin that he is still alive and never leave him.

"I will never leave you, Rin. You are my life and the only reason of my existence in these worlds…."