Ok so I had this idea floating around in my head for a while and I have started writing it so I thought I would post the first chapter. I have a plan for this story, well I do so far anyway then anything could happen :-)

Anyway here it is.


Chapter One

Naomi

I finished work at the office late as usual but that was what happened when you were a journalist and had an editor breathing down your neck for the story you were writing. It was then I heard the music coming from the car driving down the road and knew it was Tamara coming to pick me up with my dress to change into. I quickly changed in the back of the car before climbing back through and putting my seatbelt on. Driving along the road the laughter ringing out around the car as I travelled with my best friend to a party, we were singing along to the radio that she had turned up when all of a sudden I heard brakes squeaking as she slammed hard down on them and then the bang as we hit the back of the truck that had stopped in front of us and everything went black…


I woke with a jump and screamed out, it took me a minute to remember where I was, it really felt like I was back there again but as the nurse came rushing in to check I was ok I remembered I was in hospital and the knowledge of my injuries came crashing down around me again. It has been nearly a month since the car crash and I was still here in hospital and still in a lot of pain. Thankfully I was in a side room on my own I think I would have given up a long time ago if I had been on a ward with other people. Sometimes I still wonder about giving up but then I see my mums face and see how thankful she is that I made it through. I was in intensive care unconscious for about a week if not more they have told me but sometimes I forget the details, one thing I will never forget is the day the doctor told me the extent of my injuries. He started off gently by telling me the my body was covered in cuts and bruises but they would slowly heal in time and as they healed the pain would ease, it was only when he continued that my world came crashing down around me, it was like he was telling me in slow motion when he explained that I had a spinal injury and that could mean that I never walked again. I had drifted off somewhere as he continued to speak not wanting to hear anything more, in that moment all I could think was that I wish I had died. When the doctor had left the room I looked across to see my mum the tears running down her cheeks, she rushed over to me and enveloped me in a hug, I felt the pain rush through my body but at the same time everything felt numb, she kept kissing my cheek telling me that everything would be ok that we would get through this together, I just wanted to scream out at her that nothing would ever be right again, that my life just isn't worth living anymore but I knew it would only hurt her and I didn't want to do that, I couldn't shatter the positivity she had built up after knowing what she went through at the thought of losing her only daughter. I knew I was being selfish, I knew I should be grateful that I was alive that was more than Tamara and her family had. I was really struggling with my injuries and the fact that I would never see my best friend again, I didn't even get to go to her funeral, I didn't get to say goodbye and I knew that would be something that would haunt me forever.

A tear rolled down my cheek as the nurse gave me some more pain relief; they all knew me on this ward now I had been here for a couple of weeks. She rested her hand on my shoulder "It will get easier Naomi, it just takes time, you're physiotherapist is going to stop by tomorrow and have a chat with you, I think you will like her she is brilliant at her job. Now I want you to settle down again and try and get some sleep."


The following morning I woke up, mum was by my bedside as usual, she always came in first thing in the morning and stayed until last thing at night. She smiled as I opened my eyes I know she always tried to stay positive to try and get me to be positive about things "Morning love, how did you sleep last night?"

I shut my eyes briefly again before looking at her "I had another nightmare Mum, it was horrible it felt like I was right back there again, like it was all happening again. When is all this going to stop?"

A tear rolled down my cheek as mum enveloped me in a hug, it is really strange but the accident really seems to have brought us closer together. We never had the best relationship when I was growing up, we constantly fought about the strangers she had staying in the house and it was only when I started my second year at college that she realised how much it was bothering me and she stopped it from happening and we slowly grew closer and now the accident has really made me realise just how much my mum is there for me. As usual mum sat and read a chapter of my book to me, I struggled to focus for long periods of time on the text and I hated not being able to read whenever I wanted to. Mum always managed to make me relax a little more when she read to me, in a way it took me back to when I was little and mum used to tuck me up in bed and read me a story until I fell asleep. I drift in and out of sleep as mum reads to me but she is used to it. As I open my eyes once again mum smiles and pauses her reading "You ok love?"

I nod my head slowly "Yeah just tired as usual." I paused a second "Mum will you do something for me, I really really want a coffee from Starbucks, you know what I am like, would you get me one?"

She laughed "Are you sure you are ok if I leave you?"

I nodded "Yeah I will probably just sleep a bit more."

She smiled and kissed my cheek softly "Ok darling I won't be long I promise."

I smiled and felt the tiredness overcome me again "Ok mum."


I only woke up again when there was a light tap on my door; I slowly opened my eyes adjusting them to the light. A young women stepped into the room and I instantly noticed her eyes, they were a gorgeous chocolate brown with a slight twinkle deep within them. She stepped to the side of the bed and realised I had been asleep "I'm sorry would you like me to come back later?"

I shook my head "No its ok."

The young women smiled and it really lit up her face "Ok well let me introduce myself", she held out her hand to me but I didn't take it I guess I couldn't be bothered, she didn't look too surprised "I am Emily and I am going to be your physiotherapist."

If I am completely honest I don't know what came over me, the anger just seemed to rise within me again at the thought of needing physio in the first place, it brought the accident back to the forefront of my mind not that it was ever far away "I don't want physio, what can you fucking do for me, what is the fucking point of even being alive I want to be dead, I don't see the point of being alive if I may never walk again, if I can't get back to being normal."

I felt a tear roll down my cheek again, why couldn't I stop fucking crying, I wasn't the type of person that cried. Emily placed her hand gently on my shoulder, she didn't seem bothered by my outburst, I guess she was probably used to it from frustrated patients "Naomi I am not going to make you any false promises but what I can promise you is that I will work as hard as I can to have you back to being your normal self. It will take time and it will take patience from both of us, it will also take a lot of work. My main aim is to make sure you can walk again but Naomi you need to come to our sessions with a positive attitude, you have to put the effort in as much as I do if you want to get anywhere. I will come back and see you later and see if you have had a change of heart once you have had the chance to think over what I have just said."

I watched as she left the room closing the door quietly behind her, I threw my head back against the pillow the anger still coursing through my veins. Mum slowly opened my door coming in with my coffee, she handed it to me and I knew she could sense how angry I was. She sat down beside my bed as I took a sip of my coffee "Who was that darling that just left your room?"

I rolled my eyes "The Physiotherapist, she came in spouting some shit about helping me."

Mum took my hand "Love you have to try, I hate seeing you just giving up like this, you have always been such a fighter."

I opened my mouth to argue but mum cut me off, I could instantly tell that she was cross and finally getting fed up of me "Naomi I can't sit here and watch you throw your life down the drain, you are my only daughter and I love you so much it is killing me to see you like this, yes you have been through a terrible accident and you will have to do a lot of work to rebuild your life, do you really honestly think that Tamara would like to see you lying in your bed angry all the time and giving up on everything?"

I watched as mum walked out the room banging the door shut behind her, the tears began rolling down my cheeks again, I quickly wiped them away from my eyes I was so frustrated with myself for crying again. I buried my head deeply into my pillow and let everything that Emily and Mum had said to me run through my mind. It took me a while but I began to realise that I was being a complete cow to everyone around me. I realised that I needed to change my attitude, I really hate seeing mum this upset, she is really struggling with everything but she keeps her spirits up for me, to keep me going and to keep me focussed on life. I now knew that I needed to make some effort into making the changes I needed to make.


I must have fallen asleep again as I woke up and looked at the clock, it was a couple of hours since mum had left me after we had words. I was beginning to wonder if I had really pushed her too far this time when the door slowly opened and she poked her head around the side "Is it ok to come in?"

I nodded and she came and sat down next to me once more "I'm sorry Naomi, I should never…"

I cut her off "No mum it is me that should be sorry, I should stop being such a bitch all of the time, I have you and so many other people trying to help me and I keep throwing it back in everyone's faces. It is time I started to make the effort and help myself to get better. When Emily comes back later I will apologise to her and I will make sure she knows I will fully commit myself to the physio she is going to do with me and I promise I will be nicer to you and the staff. It is time to help myself now mum and I'm only sorry it took you to lose your temper with me to make me realise that."

She hugged me tightly "You don't know how good it is to hear you saying that, I just want my little girl back again."

Mum pulled back when there was a knock on the door, she smiled as Emily stepped into the room and held out her hand to shake it "Hi, you must be Emily."

Emily smiled "Yeah, you seem a lot friendlier than your daughter."

Mum laughed "Yeah I must apologise for her she can be a grumpy little cow when she wants to be but I think she has something she would like to say to you."

I felt my cheek flush red slightly as Emily laughed a little, I cleared my throat "Emily I'm sorry I shouldn't have spoken to you like I did earlier, both you and mum have said things to me today that have made me realise I shouldn't be letting this anger swallow me up and should be trying to be positive about my life so I will make a promise to you now and that is that I will make every effort I possibly can during any session I have with you, I know I need to work hard if I want to get my life back."

Emily smiled and I couldn't help but notice that it lit up her whole face "That is good to hear Naomi; it will be good to work with you." She turned to leave "I will stop by again tomorrow and run through some of the work we will be doing together."

I nodded "Ok, thanks Emily."

As Emily left mum smiled "She seems nice I think she will really put the effort in to help you, please try not to be too rude to her."

I reached over and playfully slapped her on the arm "I am not a complete monster you know."

She raised her eyebrows and I just laughed, I can honestly say I think I can see a little bit of happiness back in my mum's eyes, something I haven't seen since before the accident.