Ciao, people! Here's an angsty GraLu fic~

Disclaimer: Not mine...

Warning: ANGST, ANGST, ANGST and ANGST

...

It's cold.

It's been such a long time since I felt this way. Felt so cold. It stings at my bruised skin and makes me numb.

I lay on the freezing, stone ground, not moving. Around me are patches of freezing snow, no, not truly snow. Snow is pure and white; these patches are grey and dirty slush, tainted with the sin of war. Bodies are scattered about, crumpled and unmoving, beaten, battered, dead. Like me.

I can no longer see, my eyes rendered unable to behold the gruesome sight of this battlefeild. Darkness has swallowed everything. Blood is smeared across my face, spilling from my wounds. My clothes have been ripped in many places by the sharp blades of hate that our enemies weilded. My whole body has been covered in crimson; I am drowning in my own life source.

"Gray!"

You call my name. I can hear your worry, your fright, your desperation as you run towards my weak, shattered body. I hear your frantic footsteps running closer. You kneel down at my side. I feel your arms wrap around my shoulders, as you pull my head onto your lap. Oh how I wish I could see your face. Oh how I wish I could comfort you, tell you that I will be okay, that everything will be fine in the end.

But I know that I can't.

I can only imagine your sad face, as my eyes remain shrouded in the blackness that is death. It is an image I never wish to see. But I can feel you. I can feel your gentle touches, your warm caress against my cold skin, as you hold me in your soft embrace. I can feel the salty tears falling from your crying eyes onto my face; flowing down to my shuddering chest.

Oh, how I wish that I could speak. How I wish that I could comfort you, to stop those raindrops streaming from your tired eyes. Those precious tears that you shed should not be wasted on someone like me; I am not worthy of your sorrow. You must hold in those raindrops, and save them for a time when they are needed to water the flowers of happiness that lie in your soul. I am not worth those tears; my value is less then that of the soiled slush below us.

For I am but a slave, and you are a princess.

I guess that I can say that I am selfish, no, I must say I am selfish. From the time you found me laying on the side of the road, cold, weary and beaten, and took me in as a servant, I thought of you as more than just the lady that I served. I thought of you as my princess. You were my saving grace, my light, my becon of hope. From the beginning of my memories I was a slave. A worthless piece of property. All the torment and abuse, both physical and mental, left me as a shell of a person.

But on that day, that cold, rainy day, with your golden blonde hair and shining brown eyes, I felt as if a little part of my broken soul came together. You never treated me badly, princess. No, you thought of me not as a slave, a piece if property, but as a friend. And that was something I never had before.

Day by day, you pieced me back together, showing care, compassion and love. I don't know why you cared so, still don't. For you are a beautiful, loving princess. And I am a filthy, good-for-nothing slave. Yet I was your friend.

And you are my angel.

...

Lucy POV

Hopeless.

It's been a long time since I felt this way. Felt so hopeless. It grabs at my heart and claws at my soul.

When I saw you lying there, your body crumpled and surrounded by red, I died inside.

I call out your name, my voice dripping with despair. I run towards you, my footsteps crunching on the filthy slush that covers the stone ground.

Finally I reach you, kneeling at your side. As if on instinct, my arms reach out and wrap around your shoulders, pulling you into a tight embrace, your head resting on my lap. I gaze upon your battered body, wide eyes scanning over your shredded shirt and bruised body; blood pooling from many various gashes, staining your whole being crimson.

And I start to cry. My crystal tears fall onto your cold, pale face before running down to a shaking chest, trying its hardest to continue to rise and fall. I can't help myself. My trembling fingers caress your smooth jawline and white cheek, trying to take in as much of you as possible. I pull you closer, lamenting and sobbing, tears raining down to your face.

You wouldn't approve of it, this crying. Whenever I would cry, when you were punished or hurt, you would tell me to stop and save my tears for a time when they would be needed, You said that you weren't worth my sorrow, that you were worth less then the dirt under my feet. Oh, but how you were wrong.

I guess I can say that I am selfish, no, I must say I am selfish. I remember the day when I found you. It was a cold, rainy day and I was on my way back to the castle from visiting my aunt. I would stare out the windows back then, and while I did, my eyes landed on a huddled figure laying on the side of the muddy road. I had told the driver to investigate, and he came back holding a skinny little boy with pale skin and black hair and eyes. It was you.

I held you the whole ride home, and rushed you to my father seeking a nurse. He looked upon you with disgust, but still agreed. A week later you were assigned to me as a personal slave. But I didn't think of you as a mere slave. You were my friend. And nobody else could have you. You were mine. You brought joy and fun into my life, telling me stories from your old village and teaching me new things. You taught me to ride a horse, swordfight, climb trees and make things from paper. You went everywhere with me without complaint. You cheered me up when I was sad. You comforted me when I was scared. Despite your name, you were the color in my dull life.

And over the years you became more than a friend, so much more. I loved you. I love you. For I am a stuffy, dull princess; and you are a colorful, unique companion. Yet I was your friend.

And you are my angel.

...

Gray POV

I can tell that you are thinking as you hold me tighter. I feel the pain and sadness that radiates from you, and I know that it's my fault. I never wanted to hurt you, yet that is all I seem to do. I tried to be no more than a lowly servant, yet was pulled in by your warmth. I tried to seem indifferent, but found myself caring more than I ever should. I loved you. I love you.

Never have I sought your love, never have I sought to be held in your embrace. No, I felt it was my duty to give those myself, not searching for acceptance or any emotion at all. It was my duty to give you my all, to try my best and do everything and anything for you.

But I guess that, in the end, my best isn't even enough for your happiness.

As you pull my head to your chest, I can feel the rapid thumping of your heart. A heart that shall be broken. And my heart breaks, as I know that it is I, a lowly slave, that has shattered the beautiful, pure heart of a princess. Of an angel.

I hear you sob and lament, the rain on my face getting harder. And it starts to really rain now, providing a melancholy, depressing environment. It is said that, when it rains, it means that the angels are crying. I guess that that makes sense. The angels up in Heaven cry along with you down here, my angel.

I have failed you, my dear princess. It was my duty to stay by your side forever. I haven't lived uo to my promise. My promise to stay with you, to breath for you, to wake up and sleep for you; to live for you. Yes, I have failed, as this battered body of mine lay weak and in grave feebleness, protected in your arms. It should not be like this, no. I should not be so helpless, so pathetic. I should be holding you in my arms. I should be shielding you with my entire being. I should be comforting you in your times of trouble. I should be the one holding you, quelling the roaring fire of grief that burns inside your broken heart.

Mourn not, my beautiful princess. Instead bury me, let go my lifeless body and lay me under the earth. It was you that made my life worth living; you that put my shattered soul back together. For if you had not found me that cold day, I would have never found light; you would have never found your color.

I loved you. I love you. I will forever love you. My skin shall rot, my insides decay. But as you move on, as you continue to live and shine your whole life; know that my love for you was not buried with me. For it clings to your soul and to your heart, and shall never let go. For my undying love for you shall remain with you, nestled into your very core, for all of eternity.

And as I go, I must say

That I am glad that

I died in the arms

Of my angel

Today

~FIN~