A/N: Twist in a way. Oh, sort of AU, I shipped off Hughes' girlfriend and kid to Madagascar. They just didn't quite fit. Oh, and sorry for the horrible OOC-ness of the characters!

There's only so much one person can do.

..Only so much that I wish I could do more.

When a friend leaves you, what do you do? You can't dwell on and past and let your life pass away. No, that isn't what he would have done. He would have told me to suck it up and do something better. He believed that I wasn't meant to angst over everything.

"Maes.."

I couldn't take it. So many people believed that I was strong. That I was invincible. Isn't the converse of that stereotype always true? I might seem strong, but in truth, I'm weaker than anyone. Hughes saw that in me. I didn't have to hide behind the mask of a cool attitude.

And what did he do?

He died.

I always thought he'd be there forever. I've taken Maes for granted and he'll never come back. Never. I just.. I just can't take it. I want him back. I never got to tell him! For alchemy's sake! Why couldn't he have waited to die? He was able to post-pone or fight off anything, why not this? Why now?

I cracked my head against the wall I was leaning against, my eyes sliding shut. "Maes, I should have hit you for leaving me.." Taboo is no problem now. I wouldn't have to worry about what Maes would think or do if I happened to get caught. If I got caught. If it was up to him, I wouldn't be doing Taboo but nor would I get caught if I had done anything wrong. He was a talented man.

As if I called for something, I heard his voice, laughing, mocking me, "Roy, get up. You can't be sulking."

Maybe I'll humor my disillusioned mind and answer back.

"Roy! You might answer?"

Maybe I said that out loud.

"Maybe you did!"

And that too.

"You're not answering me anymore!"

Okay, maybe I didn't say that part out loud.

"Oh no, no you don't! Don't you dare go to sleep." I felt hands shaking me, and eventually, hoisting me up.

"Don't I have enough honor to even be carried like a bride?" This Maes sounding person lifted me up, but instead of being nice and carrying me like a bride, I was being manhandled like a child. You know, how mothers hold their child on their hips with their hands linked under their kid's bottoms, little legs either wrapped around them or dangling. Luckily, I wasn't on a hip or that probably would have hurt my goods. But being smack dab against the front wasn't much better. I want to be a bride, dammit.

"No, you don't." Eh, he sounded almost annoyed.

He's dead, what does he have to be annoyed about?

With my eyes still closed, I pressed my face against his neck. Smells like Maes. Imposter!

"Rooyy.. I told you that you can't go to sleep. You're not allowed. You know that."

"Your dead. What do you care?" As soon as I said that, I felt a rumble of contained laughter bubble in the chest against mine.

"Dead? You've honestly had one more Jack Daniels than you should have had."

"I'm not drunk!" How dare he patronize me! "You died last night! Lust had killed you!" My arms that were dangling uselessly by my sides came up, fists bunching up the material of this person's shirt. I still didn't believe that it was Maes.

"Died?" More rumbling. Darn it, Maes! "I didn't die. It's just your angsty nature getting the best of you while you're trashed!"

"Stop laughing! It isn't funny!" It wasn't. It wasn't funny at all! Didn't he realize that I'm sad? He died! Let me be sad!

"Roy, come on, why would I die like that?"

Because you were stupid. Careless. That's why. Or because you just wanted to snub me from telling you my true feelings. It could have been any reason to be honest. Being at my limit of distress, hot tears leaked down from my eyes and eventually against his neck. Who smelled uncannily like Maes. I didn't want him to go! It hurts. It really hurts to think about his death.

"Roy.." His voice suddenly sounded serious. Weird. "Open up your eyes."

Slowly, my eyes peeled themselves open and I lifted my head, blinking the tears out of my eyelashes. "Maes.." My mouth must have opened a little. It looked exactly like him!

"Roy. Do you see? I'm alive. I'm not dead."

You know, he going a little out of focus. Maybe I am drunk. He feels real, smells real, sounds real, looks real, and sounds real.

Oh crap.

"What's with the 'oh crap' face you're making?" A slow grin spread across his face as he hit realization. "You just realized you're drunk and everything you thought isn't true. Didn't you?"

Welcome to my life and the trouble that Maes puts me through.