Disclaimer: I don't own this stuff.

Kitty Problems

By Diana Moon Glampers

Chapter 1

My Sick Cat

Hello. My name's Faye Isorjiwski, seventh year student at Hogwart's. There's been a lot of talk around the school lately, mostly on the upcoming Triwizard Tournament. Word has it that two of our best students, Cedric Diggory and Harry Potter will be competing in them. Their respective groups and friends are going positively gaga over it all. I don't really care. I'll support my house, yell "go team!" and all that, but otherwise, I'm not really into it.

I've got my own problems to worry about, namely my cat, Mittens. She's got short, tortoiseshell patterned fur. She has a long tail that she likes to flail around when she's mad. She also hates everything and will scratch and hiss without provocation. One second, she'll be rubbing up against my legs, trying to get me to pet her. The next minute, she's trying to tear my throat out. I love that cat so much, but the sad truth is that she's sick. I've been taking some extra time in my potions class lately to try to figure out if there's something I can do to make my poor kitty better.

I was staying after that day, reading up on advanced potions. Professor Snape had long since left and the only students still in his room were the ones who really needed to study. We're talking students who failed a few quizzes and need to get their act together, lest they want to flunk out. Lucky for me, I usually wasn't one of them, though there was always the looming fear that I'd become one if I let my grades slip.

My study partner was a boy that was a few years younger than me, Draco Malfoy. He was a smelly boy with smooth skin and a sharp tongue, the kind of kid that thinks he's better than you despite being three years younger. We were reading up on healing potions together, though I think he was bored, really bored.

I pointed to a recipe on a page. "Okay, so if we can decrease the dosage by 40%, we might be able to cure my cat with this." I said.

Draco groaned.

"Maybe if you want your cat to be a pile of cinders."

"Why? What's wrong with this?" I said, pointing to the recipe again.

Draco pointed to one of the ingredients, pard blood.

"This stuff will make your cat ignite. Honestly, I don't see how Snape could give you any sort of praise if you don't know that."

He was correct. Snape had gone on about how dangerous pard blood could be when ingested by lesser felines. Draco put on a smug look, like he thought he was better than me.

"What the hell is that?" I said.

"What, this? It's satisfaction, Faye. I know I'm going to pass my grades in this class with flying colors. Hogwart's really has lowered its standards for adequate students in recent years, no?"

I wanted to punch that little shit so bad, but settled on giving him an angry look instead. He got up and left.

"Right. Well, this was fun, but I've got better things to do." He said.

I thought about calling him to come back to me, but decided not to. I don't need him. I can study on my own.

There was another kid sitting by me, Corey Twothorn, my best friend. He was a year younger than Draco, but he had much worse grades. Remember how I said that some students studied after class out of necessity? He was one of them. He wasn't the smartest guy in the class, but he did have a lot of energy. The kid seemed to always be happy, always smiling.

Corey was also a short little guy. I'm not just saying that because I'm tall. Corey was shorter than your average 14-year-old boy. Maybe puberty wasn't hitting him too hard. Maybe his whole family is short. The thing is, I'm about as tall as most basketball players and he's short enough that he still gets offered children's menus at restaurants.

Corey walked up to my desk with his books in hand. He smiled as he talked to me.

"Hey, Faye. How's it going?" He said.

"Not so good. I still need to come up with a potion to cure my cat. She's sick with some kind of obscure magic fever and I can't figure out what I need to do." I said.

"Did you try the cat books? I know there's plenty of cat books in the library, thanks to Trelawney." Corey said.

I sighed.

"Yeah, I checked all of them. None of them mentioned anything close to the symptoms."

For the record, I could tell my cat was sick because she was coughing up unearthly green hairballs. None of the cat books mentioned anything close to that.

"Oh. Well, good luck. Maybe if you can cure it, you can make it into a report and get an easy passing grade from Professor Snape. I'm sure even a sourpuss like him would appreciate discoveries like that." Corey said.

"Maybe. I hope so." I said.

While I talked to Corey, I couldn't help but take my eyes off of his face. Those beautiful eyes, that cute nose, his short hair, that smile… Sometimes I couldn't stop thinking about Corey. I hated it when I thought of him, though. I'd yell at myself, sometimes even punish myself over thinking about him too much.

"Well, let me know when your kitty gets better, okay? I want to pet her again." Corey said. He got up and walked away. I tried not to look at him. I waved him goodbye and pretended that I wasn't thinking of him. My thoughts were wrong, they had to be. Why?

Because I'm asexual.