Title: "Short Change Hero"

Author: Lila

Rating: PG-13

Character/Pairing: Finn

Spoiler: "Long Into An Abyss"

Length: one-shot

Summary: In his final moments, Finn just wants to see the ocean.

Disclaimer: Not mine, just borrowing them for a few paragraphs.

Author's Note: I don't know what this is, but it happened and I'm sharing. Please let me know your thoughts. I'm not really sure how I feel about it. Title courtesy The Heavy. Enjoy.


this ain't no place for no hero. this ain't no place for no better man

I.

"What's it like?" Finn asks Raven once, her hands moving in small circles across the bare skin of his chest.

They're in her quarters, the ones with the window, because they're from Mecha station but she's the youngest zero-g mech in fifty-two years and there are some perks. They gave it to her after she passed the test, after her mama's liver finally gave out. She has a window, but Finn knows her best; she'd rather her mother still be alive.

The Earth is impossibly blue from this vantage point, and he swears he can see the foaming white of waves cresting over the sea. He imagines the water tickling his back, the sun warm on his face as he's carried away.

Raven snuggles deeper into the planes of his chest, presses a gentle kiss over his heart. "It's like flying," she says and shifts, thighs sliding over his hips, and he loses himself in the softness of her skin and the heat of her mouth.

He never asks her again, but a year later he's falling from the sky and there's nothing holding him to the ground.

It feels like drowning.

-0-

Clarke isn't like other girls.

She barely cracks a smile when their people breathe fresh air for the first time in a hundred years. Instead, she hunches over a map, eyes focused on a mountain looming in the distance, a lump of dark blue amid the lush greens.

Finn makes a joke, the way he would with Raven, but Clarke ignores him, babbling about the radiation soaked forest between them and their next meal.

He knows he should be listening, figuring out how to help. He hasn't forgotten the two kids who died following his example.

Mostly, he tries not to lose himself in the brilliant blue of her eyes.

-0-

Clarke's eyes flash angrily in the dimness of the dropship.

Jasper is a stranger, a goofy kid that screwed up once and is paying with his life. Finn doesn't think he needs to drag the rest of them down with him.

He summons Raven, safe and alive thousands of miles above, cites facts to support his argument. They're just kids; they can't defeat an enemy they can't even see.

Clarke just glares at him, shakes her head in disgust. "Spacewalker? What a joke."

Her words dig inside him, touch the place where he wasted a month of air, led two teenagers to their deaths. Raven's the youngest zero-g mech, but he's the best tracker their people have. They need him in ways no one has before.

He hurries to catch up, slowing down only when he sees Clarke ahead, hair gleaming gold in the sunlight. He's never seen anything more beautiful.

-0-

Raven's face blurs, the sharp angles fading into a hazy memory of the girl he loves.

He tries to remember her voice, the curve of her smile, but he just hears Clarke's laugh when Jasper gasps his way back to life. Raven's never felt further away.

Then, the bottom drops out of his world and there's nothing left of Raven at all.

-0-

Finn remembers this:

The smoothness of Clarke's skin, the softness of her hair, the feel of her body beneath his hands. He'd never kissed anyone but Raven and he hadn't been ready for it, different lips moving over his and a new moan filling his mouth.

Clarke watches him with sea eyes, blue in the candlelight and green as she slides beneath him, a turbulent gray at the end.

"I wanted it to be you," she says and he counts the specks of gold reflected in twin pools of blue, sunlight gliding over the ocean.

He thinks he could spend forever drowning in her eyes.


II.

Finn can still hear Raven in his head.

Sometimes it's her screams and sometimes it's her laugh, but mostly it's the pain in her voice when she let him go. He promised her forever and gave away his heart to a girl he'd known ten days.

Raven is strong, the strongest person he knows, but she can't hide the deep scratches he's carved into her heart.

He makes a vow, whispers it into the broken length of Raven's spine, promises to be the man for Clarke that he never could be for her.

He'll bring her back no matter the price.

-0-

She becomes a broken record: Clarke, Clarke, Clarke, Clarke.

He matches his steps to the rhythm in his head; he won't lose her the way they've lost the rest.

They push through the night, Murphy grumbling as he stumbles through the pitch black forest. "It's not going to help anyone if we fall off a cliff," Murphy says but Finn ignores him and picks up the pace. Clarke's watch weighs heavily in his pocket. She's still out there; he needs to get to her before it's too late.

"We wasted enough time," Finn reminds him. "If Bellamy hadn't insisted on saving that girl, we'd be there already."

Murphy stops, a skid of boots through the dry leaves. "You know why he did it, right?"

Finn spins around, rifle raised and aimed. "Keep moving."

Murphy just stares. "What happened to you, man?"

Finn takes a step closer. "Clarke is out there. Dying out there. There isn't time to waste."

Murphy shakes his head, but shifts his rifle back into place. "That's why he did it. The king and the princess? It's always about what the people want."

Finn ignores him and turns back to the trail. He only cares about bringing the princess home.

-0-

That morning at the bridge, there were monsters in the trees. Masked and grotesque, warriors of death bearing down on a people that only wanted peace.

Finn sees them again when they arrive at the village, a sea of hostile faces and furious eyes. These people don't need masks to hide their crimes. He can see them in his people's sky-cell jackets.

He doesn't realize what's happened until it's over, until he lowers his rifle and stares into Clarke's blue-white face.

"I found you," he breathes, feels his shoulders ease under the weight he's shed.

Her face twists in horror and he sees everything in the stormy blue of her eyes.

The monster is him.


III.

He leads Clarke home but brings war with him.

The Grounders amass on their camp, torches bright and drums pounding into the night. Clarke stares at him with watery eyes, holds his hands as she delivers the news.

"They want you," she says, blinks back tears. "They'll agree to a truce if we give them you."

Bellamy stands beside her, a silent sentinel as he crosses his arms over his chest. He looks angry, but Finn remembers Murphy's words. He isn't the same man who sowed whatever the hell we want. Their people can't survive another war.

"We'll find another way," Raven interjects. Her voice is fierce, her eyes glowing with dark, determined heat. "There's always another way."

Clarke manages a weak smile, because Raven's right. They had no ammo, but it didn't stop them from blasting off.

Finn nods, squeezes Clarke's hands, sees the future in the sea-green of her eyes.

-0-

Clarke's holds her head high and her shoulders straight as she sacrifices herself.

"Take me," she tells Lexa. "It will be a great honor for the Sky People's leader to serve as a slave."

"I hope you're worth it," Bellamy hisses at Finn's back. His jaw is locked so tight that it might crack, but he's not stopping Clarke. Finn thinks back to Murphy's words in the woods; for them, it's become about saving everyone else.

Lexa sounds almost regretful as she turns down Clarke's offer. "I made myself clear," she says. "If we take you, it won't be as a hostage."

Clarke swallows hard and Finn knows she's contemplating the trade, contemplating giving her life so he can live. Behind him, Bellamy curses under his breath.

She turns to him, just once, a flash of blue in the firelight, and he knows what he has to do. He brought her home; he still needs to keep her safe.

"Take me," he says softly, then louder. "Take me."

"No!" Raven cries and lunges for him, Wick holding her back.

Clarke stares at him. "Don't do this."

He manages a smile as Lexa's men come for him, bind his wrists and push him to his knees. "This is me closing the dropship door." He catches Bellamy's gaze. "This is for the greater good."

Across the fire, Clarke looks at him, really looks at him, and smiles at him for the last time.

-0-

For all their threats, his execution is a fairly simple affair.

There are torches, one for each of the fallen, and they form a circle around his kneeling form. But there are no speeches and no last meals, just Raven's quiet sobbing.

Clarke is standing with Bellamy, hands clasped tightly as Lexa approaches. Finn expects jealousy, but mostly feels relief, pride. He did more than bring Clarke home; he gave her a future.

Lexa smiles at him sadly. "Your fight is over," she says and the sword swings.

-0-

It feels like floating, sunlight warm on his face and the waves at his back as he drifts away.


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