It's almost midnight, ten years after she made her deal. Everything's coming back to her, as the howls outside the window get louder. She can see her father, remember the way he'd touch her, and the smell of booze on his hot breath. She can see the flash of red in her friend's eyes, the feeling of the girl's lips against her own. All of the times she slept with Crowley, all of the times she let Lilith touch her, they're all playing on loop in her head. She can't see what's going on in the room anymore. Her pupils are dilated to the edges of her irises, but they're not taking in any light. She hears glass break, and this terrible, high-pitched shriek. It's a sound like nails on chalkboard had a love child with a crying baby and the sound the TV makes when the test color bars come on. She curls into the fetal position on the ground as a sharp pain enters her chest; she's sure one of the dogs is going straight for her heart. The pain is immense—she's shaking and crying and begging for death. Suddenly, the shrieking stops, and she manages to take her dagger and stab herself in the stomach, before the next dog takes his bite. She was facing damnation on her terms.
