Title: Letters to the Psych Ward
Author: Chrysa, Jyorraku
E-Mail: chrysa9 (at) , jyorraku (at)
Category: Humor
Note: Discovered that this wasn't posted to FFnet, so here it is.
Together again with my partner in crime, Chrysa (See 'Kiss Me Once, Kiss Me Twice'....you know you want to), here's Letters to the Psych Ward!
-- Incoming Subspace Transmission:
From: NX-01 Enterprise
To: Starfleet Psychiatry, Counseling Department, Ex: 47
Dear Dr. Spock:
I have a problem. Last time I wrote to you, I told you how much I loved the camaraderie aboard the Enterprise. We've gone through thick and thin together. I've gotten to know them so well, we're like a family. Yup, all two hundred of us, and mustn't forget the Captain's cat, Aramis. Someday I will have to ask him why he named him after a Musketeer.
Well, back to my problem. You see, my next-door neighbor, we'll call her She Who Speaks Many Tongues. The thing is, the walls are quite thin aboard the Enterprise. Normal speaking would come across the plating as a soft murmur, and I've managed to filter that out, considering She Who Speaks Many Tongues likes to keep herself in practice--all through the night and even in her sleep. Recently, however, she's had company with her during the nights. I'd like to call him Man of Great Stamina.
It started gradually. First they would talk through the night, but by the time I was accustomed to that, they started doing something completely different. It was quite shocking when I first realized what those noises where! Between She Who Speaks Many Tongues' high screams and Man of Great Stamina's low groans, the wall plating was none too adept at keeping their voices inside her room!
As a result, I've learned more than I need to know from the late night activities of She Who Speaks Many Tongues and Man of Great Stamina. For example, I've learned that She Who Speaks Many Tongues can do more than talk with her mouth, and Man of Great Stamina has a great something else to go with that stamina. Clearly, that is too much information!
I've contemplated on how I should approach this delicate situation. You see, the Man of Great Stamina is an officer of higher rank. And frankly, since I've vicariously learned of his boundless energy, I have no wish to be at the receiving end of his anger should I foul this up. However, I am losing much sleep due to She Who Speaks Many Tongues and Man of Great Stamina's twilight get-togethers. I think my supervising officer has taken note of the decline in my performance.
Therein lies my dilemma. Please, doctor, tell me what I should do!
Signed,
Frustrated Muchly by Thin Walls
