So obviously Erin is based on me, the author. When I say based, I mean heavily based. The haphephobia is all me, though the 'goth' side of her is totally exaggerated. I only wish I could get away with that. I've clearly taken some licence with the Stargate franchise, made some changes to things, but the stories will follow the general series. If some parts of what you read feel familiar, it's because I've taken some of the script and put it in here. It's not plagiarism. Honest. I started this because I thought it would be interesting to write Atlantis from a 'boring' person's perspective, but it's turned into a sort of therapy for me, which I suppose it a good thing. Rated M for language – yes, I swear that much in real life – adult themes, and God-knows-what-else I'm gonna write.

I'm aiming at making the chapters a thousand or so words long, you'll notice Rising went a little higher than that. Oops.

I hope you guys like the read. Read and review, you know the drill.

~ INTRODUCTION ~

I'm not sure if I want to go. I mean, it's a great opportunity, once in a lifetime – hell, once in 5000 year opportunity – but I'm just not sure. I'm not usually like this mind you, normally it takes me thirty seconds to decide what I want to do, then it's as good as done. It's so far away. And so dangerous. Seriously? The Lost City of Atlantis. It would be amazing. The kind of thing you'd love to tell your grandkids about… there's another thing. I can't tell anyone. Which is probably why I've been 'picked' for this mission. That and some gene thing I apparently have. How weird is that? Mum always said I was special, of course she said it in that retarded voice, and I knew she was joking, but guess what mum? Turns out you were right. I wonder if that means she had the gene too. I can't get my head around this.

I can't sleep. Why is this decision so hard? I can stay here and do the same thing I've done for the last 4 years for the next 20, or I can go and explore a new world, or new civilisation. It's obvious. I'm not leaving anything behind, and if we ever get back chances are I'll have enough money saved to get that investment property. I doubt there'll be a shopping mall in Atlantis. Which means I should pack a lot of clothes.

I'm gonna go, and I know it. Shit.

Wish me luck.

Couldn't be easier. A driver picking me up from home, taking me to a RAAF base. Hang around the base for an hour, then get a flight direct to Peterson. From there a driver would pick us up and take us to Cheyenne Mountain, simple.

There were only three people from Australia going on the mission, me, and two Army men, yet the Americans still felt the need to 'come and pick them up'. I'm was sure they were just throwing their weight around, but I've never left Australia, and my nerves are starting to get the best of me.

I checked the street, then rummaged in my bag, pulling out a cigarette and my Jack Daniels Zippo. Despite the long term mission, I really wasn't taking much stuff with me, a couple of bags of clothes, including a few new pairs of runners, and boots, and I'd already organised my DVD collection to be sent to the base. There were no restrictions on how many personal items we were allowed to take with us, which I'm sure would create havoc with my job of getting it through the gate, but we all appreciated the US Air Force doing their best to make us comfortable. I'd organised a pallet of cigarettes – yes, a pallet – to be sent to Cheyenne Mountain, and the RAAF had organised my other two pallets of personal belongings, including the afore-mentioned DVDs. All I had on my person was two bags of clothing, my wallet, half a packet of smokes and my lighter. I didn't figure I'd need anything else, I'd palletised and shrink-wrapped my gear at my old job, thanks to my old boss, and arranged it to be sent to Laverton RAAF base.

A black car turned the corner, and I butted out my smoke, throwing it into my garbage bin, and the driver pulled up.

"Erin Anderson?" He sounded unsure, and I couldn't blame him. My clothes were normal enough – jeans, and a navy shirt with the caffeine molecule on it, but the pink bow in my hair, the black fingernails, the skull around my neck and the knee high black boots with a thick inch heel my have surprised him. The black lipstick probably didn't help either.

"That's me." I offer a smile, and he returned it.

We didn't talk in the car, aside idle chat of the weather. I don't know if he knew who I was, or what I was doing, but if he did he had an enviable poker face. We passed the security gate, and flashed his credentials.

The driver pulled up outside a building, and gestured to the front door. "Head in there, they'll take care of you."

I nodded, and pulled my bags out of the car. "Thanks, Airman."

"Good luck, Anderson," he said, and smiled again.

I picked up my bags, and walked to the door. There was a buzzer next a card reader, and I pushed the button. I heard the door unlock, and pushed it open, entering a sea of uniforms. Feeling entirely out of place I walked up to what looked to be a reception desk, manned by a nice looking middle-aged woman.

"Excuse me, I'm Erin Anderson, here to see Group Captain Croft." I was nervous as all hell, and I'm sure it showed, but she barely looked at me, and picked up the phone.

My eyes wondered around the room. A few people looked at me, curious, then quickly looked away. I smiled on the inside, and I looked back at the receptionist.

"Sir, Miss Anderson has arrived." She put the phone down, and escorted me to a large office. She knocked, and opened the glass door.

"Ah, Erin Anderson, come in, take a seat." The receptionist left the room, closing the door, and butterflies started in my stomach.

I put my gear down, and sat opposite him.

"You applied for the Air Force, two years ago, Miss Anderson." He glanced at some papers on his desk, then back at me. "If you don't mind me asking, why didn't you apply again? According to this you scored high, and seemed like a good candidate. The only thing working against you seems to be taken care of."

He was of course talking about my weight. When I'd applied I weighed 120kgs, much too high for the Air Force, but my height made up for it, so it wasn't obvious at the time how overweight I was. Now I was 80kgs, and extremely fit, except for the smoking habit I couldn't kick.

"No real reason sir," despite not being in the RAAF, I still felt obliged to call Group Captain Croft 'sir', "and please, call me Erin. I found a job I enjoyed, and I thought about the RAAF from time to time, but didn't want to leave where I was working." I paused. "I'd been thinking about it more, right before I was approached, so it seemed like the time was right to do something different." Oh, and I'm a pacifist. Not sure how that will fit into the military.

He nodded. "Fair enough. I understand that you've been briefed on this mission. As much as anyone can be, anyway. The men are waiting in the mess, I'll take you there."

He led us out of the building, and we walked around the base, passing groups of uniformed personnel, who looked at me curiously. No doubt they were wondering what the Group Captain was doing with someone dressed like me.

We reached the mess, and he holds the door for me. I step aside to let him take lead, and two men stilling a table on their own saw us approaching and stood. The three exchanged salutes, and I felt like a tool. What the hell am I doing here?

"Have a seat, Miss Anderson."

"I'm Major Seth Jones," the taller of the two Army guys smiled at me, and stuck out his hand, so I shook it. He was probably in his late forties, greying slightly, and had a calming air of confidence.

"And Captain Jake Lance." This one was a little different, younger, in his twenties, and seemed more focused. He hesitated slightly before offering his hand. We shook hands, and I met his eyes, smiling. He seemed to relax a little, but I had the feeling his nerves weren't just about meeting me.

"Erin Anderson, nice to meet you both," I said, and sat down.

Preparations were complete.

We were on the plane, and had just reached cruising altitude. I yawned to pop my ears, and stretched my arms. There were a few others on the plane in uniform, but they kept to themselves. The Crew Attendants had done the first rounds, and were giving out food and drinks.

We spoke a little together, but couldn't discuss the mission at all, in case anyone overheard. Careless talk costs lives! I found out that Captain Lance was a software developer, and the Army had furthered his interest in robotics. Before accepting the Atlantis mission he had been excelling in the field, and would be working on any technology found during the mission. Major Jones psychologist, one of three to be assigned to the mission, two being from the USAF. Talking to shrinks, even informally always tended to put me on guard, always worried they were analysing my every word and movement. In his defence, Jones seemed like a nice guy, pretty chilled out and relaxed, while Lance seemed more focused, and still a touch nervous.

After a while of silence I stretched my legs out, and turned to the window, closing my eyes. It was nice to just relax for a while, not worried about work, who was looking after what, was there any issues that needed to be resolved. But I'd sworn after handing over my duties that I would do my best to forget them, and look forward to what I was about to embark on. Embark on? Seriously? I've been with these guys for four hours, and I'm already talking like a military handbook. Great.

I drifted off to sleep.

"Erin."

I woke up quickly, flinching away from the hand on my shoulder. It was just Lance.

He looked a little surprised, but shrugged it off. "You want any food? They're coming around now."

"Thanks, I'm fine for now," I replied, blushing slightly. I yawned again, and looked out the window. There was land under us. "How long was I out?" I asked.

"A while," he replied. "We're ten hours out." He turned and crossed the isle to his own seat. Good thing about this plane, not many people on it, we could stretch out.

"A while, you reckon," I said softly. I'd slept for hours. I sighed, and looked over at Major Jones. He was watching me, and when I caught his eye he smiled. I smiled back, a little unnerved, but determined not to let it show. I pulled my headphones and IPod out of my bag, and turned it up. Facing the window, I let my eyes close again.

Over my headphones I heard the captain of the plane advise to fasten our seatbelts, we would be starting our decent soon. I tightened it around my waist, and sat up in my seat. While I was sleeping I'd hunched over and my back needed cracking.

We hit pavement, and soon after were leaving the craft.

America, great. I'm over here, and all I'll see is a mountain. An escort met us, and we piled into his car. I'd shoved the IPod back into my bag, but I was hanging for a smoke. Twenty minutes later we were at the base of Cheyenne Mountain, and parking.

I pulled my lighter and a smoke out of my bag, and lit up, while shouldering my backpack. Jones had a slightly disapproving look on his face, but he could shove it. The other two didn't seem to care, which was fine by me. It was a few minutes walk to the entry anyway, and we had to wait for clearance and BS paperwork to come through, so five minutes after I'd thrown out the butt we were still hanging around outside.

Finally a Sergeant with the name patch "Harriman" met us, and we were escorted into a lift. The lift seemed to take forever. We got out, and were escorted to a briefing room, with a steel blast door covering one wall. Curious…

"Please, take a seat, the General will be with you shortly." Harriman left, and I looked around the room a little. Didn't seem very exciting at all.

I walked over to a small table with a pitcher of water and some glasses. "You men want anything?" I ask, pouring myself a glass. Lance declined, but Jones asked for one, and we sat, waiting. "Anyone know the name of the General?"

"Hammond, I believe," Jones replied. "He's in charge of the Stargate program."

"How do you know that?" I asked, curious.

"I'd been given some files to look over before we flew here. Makes for very interesting reading."

I grin. "Don't suppose you have them on you?"

"You'll be given copies of all the information you need shortly, Miss Anderson," a deepish voice with a Texan accent said.

I turned to the doorway, and Jones and Lance stood. I had no idea of the protocol when military from two different countries meet, but apparently the lower ranks salute first. I followed form in standing, feeling again like the odd one out.

"I'm General Hammond, welcome to Stargate Command." He sat at the end of the table, and we turned to him. "As you know, you'll all be shipping out in one month, we thought it would be prudent to have Miss Anderson here early, given her role in the expedition, seemed like a waste not to bring you all over at the same time.

"I just wanted to take a few minutes to meet you, and thank you for taking part in this mission. I'm sure you're all aware of how important it is, not just to America, but to Earth in general. When you've been working at this facility as long as I have, it gets easier to look at the planet on the whole, no 'America', or 'Australia'. When you're here, you're working for the one thing, the safety of this planet, and what we learn about ourselves and our ancestors applies equally, if not more, to other parts of the world." He stood.

"I have a meeting shortly, so I'll have Sergeant Harriman show you to your temporary quarters."

I was bored. It was a Saturday, which meant weekend, as while I was 'stationed' here I would work Monday to Friday. I had no DVDs, no books, nothing. Everything I owned was shrink wrapped and palletised somewhere here on base. I shoved a pair of trackies, my worn pair of runners, and an old shirt into a gym bag, and ventured out.

Typical that there were no direction signs, or maps around, barring the next to useless emergency evacuation maps. Yeah, that's gonna help, when I don't even know where I am. I was totally lost in my thoughts when someone interrupted.

"Can I help you?"

Harriman, again. "Yeah, actually mate. Uh, sorry, Sergeant. Looking for a gym? I'm assuming the base has one…?"

"Yes ma'am, I'll walk you there. If you need help on your way back just ask, they're all pretty friendly around here." He smiled. "And you can call me mate if you want, ma'am."

"Well if I can call you mate, you can call me Erin. Not sure I'll get used to the 'sir' and 'ma'am' around here. So what's your role here, Harriman?"

"Technical. Diagnostics and the like. And I make good coffee, as well as being a decent tour guide."

"So do you have much to do with Stargate operations at all?" I blushed slightly. "I'm not really up with all this yet, so sorry if it's a stupid question."

"Not at all. Most of my shift is spent in the control room, which is where the Stargate is controlled from. Aside from the basic dialling out, and monitoring of the 'gate, there's also the iris – that is a barrier to stop unfriendlies getting in – and as I said, the diagnostic side, if there are any issues, or scheduled maintenance."

"I think my brain just blew up. You do all that?"

"It can be a challenge, but it's the best thing I've ever done in the Air Force. I know it might sound lame, but even though I don't go through the 'gate, I still feel like I'm part of it, you know?"

"I know what you mean, mate. I just can't wait to get started. I feel like I'm so far behind everyone, it's going to be a hell of a task to catch up. Is there a Stargate textbook that I can study to get me up to speed?" I was joking, but on the inside I was freaking out. Seriously, a device that can send people to other planets? In use? What a head fuck.

"And we're here." He showed me in, and I was relived to see that it was normal gym equipment, no alien tech here.

"Thanks, Harriman. Appreciate it."

He grinned. "I'm Walter. You're not military, and I know it's awkward for you here. Walter is fine."

"What about the Walt-o-nator?"

He gave me a look.

"Walt-a-tron?"

He laughed, and walked away shaking his head.

What do you know, there is humour in the Air Force.

I was hot, sweaty, and still going strong on the treadmill. I wasn't used to a gym as big as this, but it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Dressed in my gym gear, only my black lipstick differentiated myself from the military personnel working out. I got a couple of smiles and nods, which I took as a good sign. A cute guy that didn't quite look military stood up to the treadmill next to me, and I tried to focus on running. Zomg he's hooooot! I imagined what my mother would say – "Hook in!", and smiled to myself, knowing that I would never. I slowed to a walk, then turned off the machine.

It's not so bad here. I could get used to it. Shame I'll be in a different galaxy in a months time. I sighed, and had a shower, mentally preparing for wandering the hallways lost.

"You look lost."

"Oh my God, seriously? I haven't even taken two steps! Is it that obvious?" I wasn't yelling, and it was mock-annoyance, but the quite cute for an old guy still gave me an odd look. "Sorry, yeah, I only got here about five hours ago. I'm not really annoyed, sorry." I tend to go into apology overload when I'm nervous, or out of my depth with something. "I'm Erin, I'll be here for the next month, helping-"

"With Atlantis?"

"Yeah, Atlantis." I could tell he was assessing me, but for some reason it didn't annoy me.

"Well I'm Colonel O'Neill, where you heading?"

"Uhm, back to my quarters, I guess. I haven't really been anywhere else since I got here, don't suppose there's a tourists map for the secret military base?"

"Not officially, but I suppose I can find you something." He smiled, and indicated which way to walk.

"I'm not in the loop with the whole Stargate thing, Colonel, what's your role here, may I ask?" I sound so stupid! I'm like a five year old trying to keep up with a grown-ups conversation! Okay, calm down, you're the new guy here, you'll get it.

"I head SG-1, the lead Stargate team."

You're a tool! A complete twat! This guy way too busy to be escorting you around a top secret military base! "Ah, right." That was all I could think of to say.

"Ah, it's not all bad, Anderson."

How the hell does he know my name? Total panic. For no reason.

On my probably panicked and worried look he grinned, and suddenly for some reason I thought now he's the five year old. "I make it a point to know who's on my base. Also I'm pretty involved with the Atlantis expedition, so I was expecting you."

Duh. You really are a twat.

"Coolio Julio."

He raised his eyes, and I half smiled, refusing to apologise for my antics.

Suddenly we were outside my room, and he smiled again. "I think you'll find everything you need in there."

"Cheers, thanks so much. I kinda feel a little out of my depth here, you know? Anyway, thanks Colonel."

"No problems, Anderson, I'll be seeing you around." He started to walk away, hands in pockets.

"Seriously, do I have to wear a name tag saying 'Erin' on my shirt? You guys are military, I'm not. No one called me Anderson, ever."

He turned back. "Erin then. I'll be seeing you."

I sighed. Complete fuckwit. Still could be worse. It could have been the President. I flicked the light on, and immediately noticed a difference with my desk.

There was a small laptop, and a whole stack of files. Stuck to the top was a Post-It note.

Hope you don't mind I let myself in. You wanted information, well here you go. Have fun.

Signed-

Walt-a-tron.

I laughed out loud, stuck my headphones on and started reading.

"I said tell me your name, is it sweet? She said my boy it's Dagger, oh yeah…" For some reason I retain information better not only with music blaring, but when I'm singing too. Don't ask me why, it doesn't really make sense, but ever since I was kicked out of my high school library for inappropriate language – hey, I didn't realize exactly what I was singing – I'd found that being on my own with headphones was the best way to study, so I was pretty much in heaven right now. I love sci-fi… at least, sci-fi movies, never got around to reading any classics, and this was like something straight of Wormhole X-Treme. Except this was real. And not quite as lame.

I felt something on my shoulder, and gasped, flinching away from it. I turned, yanking off my headphones in a quick movement. I don't know why, but probably the quirkiest thing about me, is I hate being touched. More than that, if someone touches me, even if I'm passing someone a lighter and our fingers touch, I get sick to my stomach. It passes after a few seconds normally, but it's that panic sick you get when you realize you're being followed by someone in a dark street, or that feeling you get when you remember you forgot to turn off the gas. I hate it, but that's how I am, and I've no idea why. Family is a little different, but even people I've known for ages, people I'd literally die for, and trust with my life, one of them hugged me once, and I threw up all over his back. It wasn't pretty, but he was okay about it, didn't get angry or laugh at me. I also hate confrontation. I suppose those three things kinda come in one package for me.

"Miss Anderson?" It was a bit of a no-nonsense Captain, looking at me oddly.

"Yeah, that's me. What can I do for you?" I was getting my breath back, but even being in this room with him was freaking me out, and I felt my muscles tense for no reason.

"I was asked to check on you, ensure you're settling in okay."

I looked at the clock on the dressing table, it read 08:00. "Wow, is it 8pm already?"

Again with the odd look. "It's 0800, Sunday, ma'am."

He thinks I'm crazy. Great, better they know now, I suppose. I can't believe I've been reading for thirteen hours. Then again, that's pretty much my style.

"I suppose I should get food then. Can you please show me to the mess? Oh, hang on!" Walter the Great had left a map with the files, and I picked it up. "Mind if I try to find my own way?"

"Of course." He wasn't one for conversation, and that was fine with me. We walked through the concrete corridor, and I tried to follow the map. I only got lost once, coming out of an elevator and turned the wrong way. The Captain corrected me, and I found the mess easily from there.

"Awesome, thanks Captain."

He nodded, and left me at the door. I wandered in, probably looking lost again. Somehow I ended up with a tray, and food, and found a table to myself. Again I was getting odd looks, this time it was getting annoying. Okay, chill. You know you get cranky when you're tired. Eat, then get some sleep, you'll be fine. I had a cheese tomato sandwich, and was playing with an apple, thinking about everything I'd read.

They've been doing this for almost eight years now, going to other planets and galaxies through that thing. I now recognised the cute guy from the gym as Dr. Daniel Jackson, the man who made all this possible, and was glad I hadn't spoken to him. No matter what I said I would have put my foot in it somehow. And Colonel O'Neill, the silver haired fox from yesterday. The reports from some of their missions were mind-blowing.

"Is this seat taken?"

I looked up and saw Major Jones.

"Nope, go for your life."

He sat, and poked his hot breakfast. "The food here is actually pretty good."

"Mhm. I just had a sandwich… kinda hard to screw that up though."

"I didn't see you last night. You been keeping busy?"

Ugh, I get it, you're a shrink. Wonderful. "Yeah, actually. I don't start till Monday, but I've been catching up on some reading."

"Amazing, isn't it? All the things they've done. And the world is clueless. Makes you wonder about how much we as a people really know, and how much is kept from us."

"Well I've always believed there had to be life on other planets, pretty bloody short-sighted not to. Makes sense that if anyone knows about it, it would be the government. I'm just glad to be part of it now, is all."

He grinned. "Yeah, I know what you mean. So you're in logistics, right?"

I nod. "Yup."

"So they pulled someone all the way from Australia, to do this. No offence Erin, do you know why?"

"Nope, no idea. I've got a mate in the Air Force over here, but I've never met him in real life or anything. I don't know if he had anything to do with it, I couldn't just ask him, you know? We're pretty close, well, as close as you can be for people living a world away. But yeah, no idea." My finger started to tap on the table, and I paused. "You just gave me an idea. I'll see you around!" I dropped the tray off back to the kitchen staff, and pulled the map out of my pocket. If Seriv, my mate online, had anything to do with this I know how I could find out.

I jogged back to my room, and pulled out my smokes and lighter while booting up the laptop. Sure enough, once it booted a very familiar icon greeted me on the desktop. Son of a bitch!

I double-clicked, and hit Play when the annoying screen came up. I logged onto my WoW account, and sure enough, Seriv was online.

/w seriv

Enter

[To Seriv] Hey you!

[Seriv] hey Ell! what's going on

[To Seriv] I think you know!

[To Seriv] Are you responsible for this?

[Seriv] lol for what?

Someone knocked on my door. "Hang on a sec!"

[To Seriv] Seriously, did you get me this job?

I had to be careful about what I said, just in case my gut was wrong.

Someone knocked again. "Dammit, one sec!"

[Seriv] just answer the door Erin

What? Omg, no way! I jumped up, and came face to face with a Major balancing an open laptop on one hand.

"Surprise? And you really shouldn't be smoking in here." He grinned.

"No fucking way! You did this?" I couldn't stop smiling.

"I told you we'd meet up on day. Sure, just didn't know when. So can I come in?"

"Of course!" I stepped aside, and he looked around.

"Just like home?"

I grinned. "Yeah, well, you guys have all my stuff. It's okay for now though."

He stuck his hands into his pockets. "No hug?" He asked quietly.

He was one of the few outside my old job that knew about my touch phobia. I looked down. "Sorry."

"Hey, it's all good. It's just great to finally meet you! You look a little tired."

"I was up all night reading," I replied, nodding at the files, still feeling self-conscious. "Didn't realize the time."

"You've gotta stop doing that."

He also knows most of my bad habits.

"So, James, or is that Major Ranklin?" I teased.

"Hey, James is fine, Anderson. I'd heard about some civilian giving the staff a hard time, and figured it had to be you." He saw my face fall, and hurried to correct. "That was a joke, Erin. I'd been keeping tabs on you since you arrived. It's all good."

I smiled weakly, and he gave a strange half-smile. "So are you going to Atlantis too?"

"No. I'm staying here."

I tried not to let me disappointment show.

"Hey, you'll be fine. Tell you what, I finish in three hours, you want to get out of here?"

"Hell yeah!"

I'd found my way to the gym on my own this time, and was cycling to the beat of Static-X, with my eyes closed. I still had two hours before James finished his shift, and was planning a nap before we went out. I still couldn't believe he was behind this. He'd told me that when he heard the guy in charge of logistics for the expedition, Major Reilly, was going crazy trying to find a team he'd told him about me. They'd gotten hold of my records, and my old application for the RAAF. Obviously Reilly had thought I sounded good enough, because I'd gotten the visit the next day. Fuckin' intense. I sighed, and opened my eyes. Hot guy was back. Correction, Dr. Jackson was back. Ah, eye candy is good for the soul. And oh yeah, he's pumping iron. That's what I'm talkin' about!

I pulled my IPod off, and headed to the showers.

Shortly after I was in the corridor, studying my map again.

"Hmmm… may as well, or I'll just get lost again tomorrow…" I talk to myself. Often. Pretty much constantly. What I'd just decided then was to check out my new workplace.

It was pretty much my fault. Okay, it was totally my fault. I was looking at the map, not paying attention to what was going on around me, so when I crashed into a very muscular, kinda oldish guy it was my bad. My map went flying, as did his oversized wrench, and he managed to maintain his footing while I hit the ground. Panic. I was fine, but I felt like I'd been punched in the stomach. Dammit. Stop. Think. It's okay, don't panic. Ohhhh, way too late for that. I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing, and not freaking out. The sick feeling in my stomach settled slightly, and I opened my eyes to find the Sergeant standing over me, offering his hand.

"Whoa, you okay miss?"

See, he's nice. Stop freaking and act normal! I nod. "Yeah, I'm fine." I ignore his hand and stand up, albeit on slightly shaking legs. "I'm cool. So sorry about that, totally my fault, should have been looking where I was going, sorry." Apology overload again.

He took a step towards me, and subconsciously I stepped back. It was a blessing and a curse that the hallway was otherwise deserted. Blessing because it meant no one else had witnessed my freak-out session, curse because my irrational mind had a very firm dislike of being alone with men. Especially someone that I'd just literally run into. Oh I hate my mind.

"You sure you're okay? You look a little green…" He was clearly not just going to walk away, so I gave the best I had of a smile.

"Yeah, sorry, yeah, of course I'm fine. No damage done. Are you okay? Sorry, I wasn't looking." I was babbling, and couldn't stop. My stomach ached.

"I'm fine miss, as you said, no damage done." He paused, assessed me. "Maybe I should take you to the infirmary. You look really pale."

"Oh, no, no, I'm fine. It's the black lipstick, I'm not that pale. No, I'm great. Sorry. Totally my bad. I'm new, and was too busy looking at the map, and wasn't looking around me, corners are evil. Sorry-"

"Sergeant Siler to the control room! Sergeant Siler to the control room!"

"You sure you're okay? That's me, I've got to go. I can take you to the infirmary on the way-"

"No, seriously, sorry, I'm fine, it's cool. No problems." Sigh of relief.

"If you're sure." He gave me a hard look, and I backed up another quick half-step. "Look, if you need to, just head there, okay? I don't want anyone saying I'm giving people a hard time."

"I'd heard about some civilian giving the staff a hard time, and figured it had to be you." Shut up, stupid brain! I giggle nervously. "Yeah, sure, no probs. Sorry again." For the millionth time, you twat. Just shut up and he'll leave.

He gave me another look before taking off down the corridor in a jog.

My legs sunk, and I fell to the ground.

Somehow I rose and found my quarters. By the time I got back I was crying, and I unlocked my door with shaking hands. I rushed to my bathroom and threw up the sandwich and fruit I'd eaten earlier. Looked at my face in the mirror, red, blotchy, eyes streaming. I collapsed onto my bed and cried, hard. Why? Why the hell me? Sometimes all I want is a hug.

I woke half an hour later, feeling like shit. Dragged myself to the bathroom for another lunch repeat, and stepped into the shower. I took my time, washing my hair twice, then wrapped my hair in a towel and got dressed.

I brushed my teeth, and put my IPod on, sitting on my bed with another file. Episodes like that always leave me shaky, jumping at shadows, and I was considering cancelling on James when there was a knock on my door. I jumped, then stood slowly to open the door.

"Heya lovely." He did a double take, I guess I looked like shit as well as feeling like shit. "What happened?" He demanded, and I took a step back.

"Nothing. I'm fine."

He stepped towards me, and typically I stepped back again.

"Erin, what happened?"

I looked down. "Just ran into someone and freaked out. You know what I'm like." I turned and walked to my desk. "It's pathetic, I hate this!" I could feel hot tears on my cheek, and brushed them away, angry. I couldn't even look at him. "I'm sorry."

"Dammit Erin, don't apologise. It's not your fault." He sighed.

"I think I should probably stay here."

"No way!"

I turned to look at him, and the look on his face was pure determination.

"Come on, you always said you wanted to travel to other countries, now that you're here you're not just gonna sit in a mountain, are you?"

"Well I've still got a ton of reading. And I could do my Warcraft dailies…" The last part was a joke, but I really hadn't even made a dent in the files I'd received.

"Erin, come on. Let me take you out to dinner at least." He crossed his arms and frowned at me. "You need to get out, come on."

Reluctantly I followed him out of the base, and to his car.

It was a pretty quiet ride, he gave me some commentary as we were driving.

I knew he lived in Colorado Springs, and was looking forward to seeing where he lived. It seemed so nice here. I pretty much grew up in the city, and even speeding on the highway felt calmer, more relaxed. I could get used to this. Shame they didn't need me before the insane 'indefinite' mission.

"We're almost there," he said, pulling off into a side street.

"Cool as."

We pulled into the driveway of a nice looking house. Ohhh, butterflies stirring again.

"No, no, no! I didn't pull the Maiden! Was so not my fault. It was the stupid huntard! I was healing for that one, and I was watching the damage meter, I'd just reset it, and the hunter jumped on top, that's about when I started freaking. I only had half mana, he's lucky we didn't wipe!"

"Sorry, rules of the game state that any and all wipes are the healers fault, regardless of what happens."

"Arg, typical tankadin! How come it's never the tank's fault?"

"Because this tankadin rocks, duh." He laughed, and reached for my drink. "You want another?"

"Yeah, why not. I do have work tomorrow though." I leaned back in the seat. "Can't wait. Do you know the guys I'm working with?"

"Yeah, they're not bad. Only you and three other loggies are going, and only you guys are on the prep team. All male, of course, and military, but you should be fine, they're good guys. You got two Sergeants, Hopwell and Matthews, and Major Reilly leading. Hopwell is a bit of a newb, but means well. You should get along great with him, and Reilly is a good leader, and knows his stuff. And his stuff is everything. That guy owns everyone at trivia night. Matthews… well, he's a little different." He passed me my drink.

"What do you mean?"

"Real quite, keeps to himself like no one I know. Rumour is that he's got no family, and no friends, at all. He lives on base and last I heard he hadn't left for God-knows-how-long. One of those guys that has nothing in his life except his work. Any time he's not at the gym, mess or in bed, he's working, especially for this project." He pointed his drink at me. "Like you, Reilly wanted this guy on the team. Maybe being on a close team will do him good."

I thought about what he said for the rest of the night, and was still thinking about it when James dropped me back at base.

I used the map to find my quarters, and crashed.

And that's the first introduction. I didn't realize how long the 'introduction' would be, so I've broken it up into five parts, this one, and the next four chapters, which will be each 'week', leading up to Rising Parts One and Two.

And yes, I realize the chances of a mate in World of Warcraft getting someone a job going to other planets are non-existent, but isn't that why we watch / write / read these things? :D

Song in this one is The Fratellis, "Chelsea Dagger".