You may think it's not possible to get high off of too many throat lozenges…well this crackfic story is gonna prove you wrong. BEING SICK SUCKS. D=
I don't know how this happened; I'm not very coherent right now and had too many halls. So tell me if I should keep going.
"Hey! Hands off my boyfriend!" grunted an irritated girl of the green variety.
"YOUR boyfriend? Fiyero's mine! We're perfect for each other!" retorted an angry blonde.
"Phfff, yeah we'll see about that in act two." Said the green one with a smirk.
"Ladies, ladies, please. There's plenty of Fiyero to go around." Cockily announced the prince.
"Ah, love triangles, they're hilarious." Noted Nessa.
"Oh for sure." Agreed his Ozness, all powerful Oscar.
Moments after Nessa spoke, Boq the Munchkin walked into the room.
"Oh, hi there Miss Galinda…" said Boq timidly.
"Shut up shorty, can't you see that Galinda and Elphaba are fighting over me?" said an annoyed Fiyero.
Boq's eye twitched.
"Pluse rushing…face flushing…hands…making…fists…" stuttered Boq.
"Wuh ohhh, looks like it's a love square now isn't it, Nessa?" said Oscar as he prodded Nessa with his elbow.
"Head reeling…jealousy…rising…" Nessa was nearly green with evny.
*cough*
Woaaaah, there's a spooky resemblance now…
"Guess I was wrong. A love pentagon then."
The tension in the air was so thick one could cut it with a dull butter knife. Then, all Hell broke loose.
"You stupid no good Artichoke! Boyfriend stealer!"
"DUMB BLONDE!"
"I'm not short! I'm vertically challenged! And Miss Galinda is mine!"
"I'll kill you, Pinky! Boq is mine!"
"I'm hungry! And Elphaba and Galinda can both be mine!"
The Wizard sighed.
I really don't want to get involved with these hormone crazy young'uns.
"Children! Children, settle down. Hey! Galinda, no hair pulling! NO, ELPHABA, NO BITTING. Fiyero, stop giving Boq a wedgie! Nessa! Put. The. Stick. Down. NOW!
Approximately fourty-seven minutes later, a phone call to Madame Morrible, the head Shiztress, the five young adults settled down.
"Hmpf. I almost had her." Pouted Galinda.
"You wanna go Blondie?" said Elphaba as she shot a glare of unabashed anger directed at the blonde.
"Now, now children, violence is never the answer."
"What about in CoD?" asked Fiyero with his hand raised.
"I'm pretty sure Fish aren't violent." Replied the Wizard.
"No, I mean CoD, like Call of Duty? I mean, if you want win, you gotta do some killing."
"That's stupid question, you could easily just camp and-"
"Oh, so you're a nooby camper right, Biq? Huh? Is that it, Biq?" taunted Fiyero.
"IT'S BOQ. And it was a rhetorical statement!" spat the Munchkin.
"THAT'S IT. I DIDN'T WANT TO DO THIS, BUT YOU KIDS HAVE LEFT ME NO CHOICE. MADAME?"
Madame Morrible cackled so terrifyingly, even Elphaba shuddered.
"Yes, that's right you're Ozness, since you teenagers can't seem to simply get along-"
"We're in our twenties! We're not teenagers." interrupted Elphaba.
"Well with your interrupting problems I'd like to see you prove me wrong, though I doubt you will!"
Elphaba closed her mouth.
"Now as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, the Wizard and I have decided that you all need to get the stress out of yourselves. Meaning, that we're going to have: A WRESTLING COMPETITION!" finished Morrible, with a proud smile on her face.
Jeez, I give her two months to plan and this is what she comes up with?
"Uh, yeah! That's right, winner gets the girl or guy of his or her choice, the rest is left to forever quarrel in the love square…triangle? I was never good a geometry." Continued the Wizard.
"How is this going to guarantee the love of the other for said victor?" asked Elphaba
"Because if you don't comply, Morrible will kick you out of Shiz, and brand you as some sort of public enemy alright? Kids these days…no respect."
"This isn't fair! I'm in a wheelchair!" complained Nessa.
"Argh, Fine, you get a sword alright? Sheesh."
"Great, give the girl with no co-ordination a sword. Wonderful." Said Fiyero as he rolled his eyes.
"I hate to agree with him, but something bad's going to happen." Added Boq.
"Oh now, you choose to agree with each other?" screamed the Wizard in frustration.
"Everyone go to your rooms!"
"Phff, who are you? My father?" muttered Elphaba
"DON'T MAKE ME GET MY METAL HEAD TO YELL! EVERYONE, OUT! NOOOOW!"
