Elden paced in his room restlessly. They had been at Skyhold for a while now, but it all still felt so unreal to him. Being the Herald of Andraste had been overwhelming enough, and now he was the Inquisitor as well, living in this huge room and commanding an army. He had half expected them to treat him more as a figurehead, to parade him around when necessary and use him to close Rifts but otherwise treat him as a leader in name only. Instead they came to him for advice on nearly everything. He was probably the least qualified person in Thedas to lead them, but he couldn't let them down either.
Morale in the Inquisition was low after Haven despite the precautions they had taken upon arrival in Skyhold. Elden couldn't blame any of them; he himself often found his sleep interrupted by nightmares. As the Inquisitor, though, he felt he had a responsibility to do more. Vivienne had spoken to him about his new title shortly after their arrival and while he didn't completely agreed with everything she said, he knew she was right overall. He had to become someone they could look to and respect, a leader they could have faith in.
He rubbed his hands together. They were red and blistered, raw from all of the extra training he had been doing lately. His hands had always been too soft no matter how hard he worked, and he hated it. Haven was the first time he had held a sword in years, but he had trained hard there and he thought he was finally getting used to it again. Apparently it hadn't been enough. He took a deep breath and made up his mind. If he became a Champion, perhaps he could become what he needed to be in order to inspire, to give everyone hope that maybe they really could win despite everything. It would be a small victory for everyone to celebrate, even if it didn't get them any closer to defeating the true threat. Elden took another breath and went to accept Lord Chancer's offer to train him.
That was that, then. Elden was on track to become a Champion. Apparently there were three other Champions in the Exalted Planes he could challenge, so after marking several likely locations on his map, he headed off to select his team. Cassandra and Varric had been eager to accompany him, so now he just had to check with Dorian and see if he would be willing to lend a hand. He found Dorian in his usual spot in the library but before he could say anything Dorian spoke, catching Elden completely off guard.
"I could watch you roam Skyhold all day," Dorian said with a smile. "Here and there you run, checking in on your followers. Why don't they come to you, feed you grapes, rub your shoulders? I suppose it's more fun this way. For me, I mean. You're rather strapping."
What? Oh! Yes, flirting! He could do that! Elden turned a bit red. He was pleasantly surprised by this sudden turn of events and definitely flattered. It was true that they had become friends after everything they had been through together, but Elden hadn't even dared think that Dorian might actually be interested in him. Of course, it had been quite some time since Elden last felt the desire to do something like this and he was a bit at a loss. He desperately tried to think of something to say, preferably something witty and intelligent. He failed.
"I've noticed you're rather strapping yourself."
He was probably turning even redder now, and Dorian grinned, apparently enjoying this.
"Yes, but that only takes eyes," Dorian replied smoothly.
That was certainly true. Without thinking Elden said, "Luckily I have those." As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he cringed inwardly, no doubt turning even redder if that was possible, but Dorian chuckled and suddenly Elden didn't feel so bad. Dorian had a very nice laugh.
"You do; a very fetching pair, I might add." Dorian smiled at him, but mercifully moved on. "But you didn't come by to listen to me fawn. What can I do for you?"
It took Elden a moment to remember what he had come here for. "I am planning an expedition to the Exalted Planes and was wondering if you would be willing to accompany me."
"Of course. Who are we to kill there?"
"Hopefully it won't come to that. If I'm to become a Champion, I have to defeat three others in order to gain some renown."
"Are you bringing me to witness your prowess in battle, Inquisitor?" Dorian asked, grinning. "I should have known you were a romantic."
To Dorian's obvious delight, Elden turned bright red again. "That…wasn't exactly why I asked you to come."
"Oh? Do tell."
"You carry yourself well, on the battlefield and off. You never seem rattled. I was hoping you could give me some advice on my fighting style."
"Flattery will get you everywhere, Inquisitor. I would, of course, be happy to help you in any way I am able," Dorian said with a slight bow of his head.
"Thank you, Dorian," Elden said, rather relieved knowing he would be there to help him.
After saying his goodbyes, he headed to Vivienne's balcony. She had given him advice before; hopefully she would have some insight to offer him in regards to his chosen specialization.
"So you've decided to become a Champion, my dear?" she asked as he approached. "I approve. We can use this to our advantage. You always did have a tendency to lead from the front."
"Thank you, Madame Vivienne. If you have a moment, that was actually what I wanted to speak to you about."
"Of course, my dear."
Vivienne had quite a few suggestions for him, from the type of armor that would give the right impression (flashy and eye-catching, of course) to how he should carry himself when in the public eye. She also agreed with Lord Chancer's recommendation that Elden cease training with the soldiers. Elden wasn't sure what he thought about any of this. Chancer had talked about the glory and fame becoming a Champion would bring him, and he didn't want any of that. What if this was a mistake? His concern must have shown on his face because Vivienne stopped and reached out, touching his arm in a reassuring manner.
"This is ultimately up to you, my dear," she said. "You are wise to utilize us for our expertise, but it is up to you to decide what to do with this information. You will have our support regardless."
Elden's head was spinning as he left the keep. There was just so much to consider and he honestly wasn't sure he could live up to what the title of Champion meant, let alone Inquisitor. Of course he could adapt it, make it into a role he was more comfortable with, but what would happen if it wasn't enough? What if he just made it more painfully obvious that he wasn't cut out for this? He had tried to make something of his life before, struggling to adapt the role his parents tried to force him into so it was something he could live with, but that had failed utterly. He couldn't help but wonder how long it would take for the Inquisition to send him away too. Elden fiddled with his gloves, wincing slightly as the rough leather scraped against the raw skin of his palms. Perhaps there was time to get more sword practice in before he got back to work. That usually helped him clear his head.
Sera caught his eye from a dark corner behind the tavern, so he changed course and headed her way. She led him into the ruined shell of a building that had yet to be repaired and turned around with an excited grin.
"What's going on?" Elden asked, a little apprehensive. She definitely had a plan, and with Sera, that could end with explosions, missing pants, or anything in between.
"You, me, pranking again," she said with a mischievous grin that made Elden glad he wasn't the target. "I've got a great one in the works."
"I'm sorry, Sera, I can't today. I'll be leaving in the morning and I've got a lot to do before then. How about when I get back?"
"Oh no you don't," she said, poking him in the shoulder. "I've seen you trainin' day and night. You're gonna start looking like a perpetually startled nug. What you need is a good ol' prank. I told you I'd get you with a pie, didn't I? Take a break or I might still do that."
"Oh," he said, crestfallen. "Do I really look that worn down?"
"Nah, only when you think no one's looking, but every little bit helps people remember their Inquisitor's actually human. You usually look all intimidating."
"Intimidating?" he asked skeptically.
"When you're doing your commanding thingy, sure. Now let's go!"
Elden grimaced. "While I appreciate the thought, I should really get back."
"And what, may I ask, are the two of you doing skulking in the shadows?" Dorian asked as he rounded the corner, stepping over bits of broken wall and taking them both by surprise.
"Shite, how did you find us?" Sera yelped.
"You may be stealthy, but our Lord Inquisitor lacks the grace required," Dorian said with a grin. "So what's the scheme?"
"Nothin'," she said, sounding incredibly suspicious.
"Let me guess; being difficult as usual, is he?" Dorian asked. Then, to Elden he said, "If anyone's earned a break, it's certainly you."
"Does everyone think I look like a startled nug?" Elden asked incredulously.
Dorian tilted his head in exaggerated thought. "Pretty apt description, actually, if a tad incomplete."
"Yeah?" Sera said. "What would you add, fancypants?"
"I'd say he looks a bit more like a sad puppy most of the time."
"If both of you are quite done," Elden interrupted, "I should be going."
"Oh come now, we're only teasing," Dorian said, reaching out to stop him from leaving. "Well, I am, at any rate. I suppose I shouldn't speak for Sera."
"Look, I have a lot I need to do before we leave tomorrow," Elden said. "If I'm going to become a Champion, I need to—"
"A Champion?" Sera spat suddenly, taking him completely by surprise. "You are such an arse. Forget it, I'll be watching you." She stalked off, muttering under her breath, "This'll take more than a pie to fix."
Elden was too stunned to say anything as he watched her go. He felt queasy. Maybe he had made the wrong decision. He hadn't thought anyone would be opposed to his choice, certainly not angry. Who else would be as upset as Sera obviously was?
"Don't worry about her," Dorian said, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall. "She'll come around."
Elden shook himself. He couldn't afford to second-guess himself, and he certainly couldn't let his worry show. Apparently he needed to work on both of those things. "Of course, thank you," he said, turning to Dorian with a smile that he hoped looked less strained than it felt. "I'll be all right. I'm just trying to get used to this Inquisitor thing."
Something—disappointment? Concern?—flashed across Dorian's face, so swiftly Elden wondered if he'd imagined it. "Well," the mage said lightly, "if you ever want to talk, you know where I'll be."
"Thanks," Elden said, smiling again. He appreciated it, he really did. There was enough to worry about without him adding to it, however. "We'll be leaving first thing tomorrow," he said instead. "Are you still willing to go?"
Dorian grinned. "Wouldn't miss it."
Elden had a lot to do before leaving. He spent the rest of the day greeting visiting nobles, checking equipment and supplies, reviewing construction plans for Skyhold, and finally ended the evening in the war room with the advisors. They were sending Inquisition soldiers out to search for survivors and look for rifts Elden might have missed near the Hinterlands, and Elden always hated this part. He wasn't very good at strategizing. He knew it needed to be done, but he always second guessed himself and tried desperately to find the safest route. If they were to search effectively they needed to cover the widest area possible, but that would leave them isolated if they were attacked. Eventually he and his advisors found a compromise between effectiveness and safety, but Elden still felt sick. He was reminded once again why he hadn't pursued a military career. He was grateful for his advisors and he knew he could rely on them, but ultimately the decision was his and he doubted he would ever get used to that.
Elden had hoped to talk to Sera at some point today, but now it was much too late. Obviously she didn't want him to become a Champion, and he didn't know why. Would others feel the same? Vivienne and the other nobles had approved, but what about people like Sera?
He had thought becoming a Champion would be the best way to protect others on the battlefield. He was decent with a sword and shield but his real skill lay in how much punishment he could take. If he could hold the tide at bay while the others did the real work, that was fine with him. But it worried him how much Sera seemed to hate Champions. He had seen the way mages looked at templars. If he was feared, he wasn't sure how much good he could do.
And Maker damn it, he didn't want to be feared.
He slept uneasily. The next morning he took a few minutes he really couldn't spare to try to find Sera, hoping he could at least speak with her briefly before he left, but she was nowhere to be found. That, among many other things, would have to wait until he returned. With a sigh, he headed out with his companions.
