A/N: It's been a long time since I wrote anything or posted anything so this isn't one of my best works… Life's been a bitch, so has inspiration so… Enjoy some Tyki/Lavi that must be my favorite pairing from DGM!
Taking hold, breaking in
The pressures all need to circulate
Mesmerized and taken in
Moving slow, so it resonates
It's time to rest, not to sleep away
My thoughts alone, try to complicate
I'll do my best, to seek you out
And be myself, and not impersonate
Bloody faced, kissing death
The library was silent except for the occasional sound of pages being flipped. There were only a few torches lighten up the cramped space and a candle burnt on one of the tables. Next to it was a pile of old and dusty books and a few parchments covered in a tight and neat handwriting. Surrounded by tall shelves, deeply concentrated on his book, there was Lavi, eyebrows furrowed as he deciphered the ancient writings. It was the middle of the night and he had been working since the late afternoon. He had been ordered to finish the translation of that work by the Bookman so he wouldn't allow himself any sleep before having at least gone through a quarter of his task.
By this time of night, everyone else in the Black Order's headquarters was safely asleep in their room, well as safely as you could get in the middle of a Holy war. Cases of Akuma being spotted all around the globe were reported daily and there was just so much the exorcists could do. Komui insisted that they'd take a break between missions and rest. Lavi had just returned from a particularly tough mission which had been a success in retrieving Innocence but a disaster in the loss of many, too many Finders.
Running a cold hand across his tired face, Lavi stifled a yawn and allowed his eyes to rest for a bit. He had not slept for three days and his head was starting to ache. One more page and he would go to bed, he decided. He refocused on the book but suddenly went still. He thought he heard something, a soft step or the sound of clothes brushing. He didn't dare make any sound, and listened carefully. The room was silent except for the crackling of torches' fire. Lavi held his breath and jumped out of his chair when he could make out another breathing in the room. But it was empty. He couldn't see anyone among the tall shelves and the dark shadows. He started to think he only imagined the soft breathing he had heard. But he hadn't.
A warm hand stifled his surprised yelp and a low voice murmured right next to his ear.
-No need to be so tense, shōnen.
A shiver ran down his spine. He should have been used to it by now but he couldn't suppress the boiling emotions inside his head. Anger was the first to invade his mind and he threw a punch that was easily dodged but he was now facing the other.
Tyki Mikk returned his death glare with his usual calm demeanor and Lavi should have been used to it too but it still infuriated him and his hand shot to his thigh only to grab air. A cold smile stretched the Noah's face as he pulled the hammer from his pocket. It was terror now that took over Lavi's senses and crawled in his mind and shook his limbs. He should have been used to it but it still hurt when his knees touched the hard tiles. It was at time like this that Lavi realized how useless he was. Without his Innocence, he couldn't do anything and he was entirely at the Noah's mercy. The tears fell down as they always did and a gloved finger wiped them away.
-Did you miss me?
The whisper almost didn't reach Lavi's ears but it did and he caught the hand before it fell. The emotions swirling inside of him were no longer anger or terror, nor were they fit to belong to an Exorcist. He should have banned those emotions long ago, when he had become a Bookman apprentice. These emotions, they were no longer Lavi's or any of his forty eight others personae. They were what made him clutch to this gloved hands and raise a tear streaked face. They were what made him open his mouth and whisper in a broken voice.
-Yes…
Lavi hated himself for letting those emotions in, letting them break him and bring him down to this sobbing mess. He hated himself for letting a Noah cup his face and gently rub his thumbs across his cheeks. He hated himself for tilting his head upwards and meeting the Noah's lips half way. He hated himself for relishing in the warmth of the kiss.
Lavi didn't remember when this all started and he didn't remember when was the last time he saw Tyki like this. He tried to forget all about those nights. He tried to ignore the feeling of longing that tore his inside. It was just another mask he had to put up, another lie he had to tell his friends. He mastered the art of hiding with the Bookman and now he hid the pain from him. These feelings of loss and these feelings of love, they were the worst enemies of the Bookmen. But he couldn't help them. Even when he thought he had managed to destroy them, Tyki Mikk would come and shatter all his illusions over and over again.
Tyki's lips against Lavi's always felt hot, almost unbearably so but Lavi wasn't afraid of being burnt. He used to be so cold and Tyki was so warm. His lips moved slowly against his as if he was afraid of breaking him. Lavi pushed with all his strength like he was starving for Tyki's taste and maybe he was. They broke the kiss only for a second before Lavi pulled Tyki down by the neck and the kiss was more forceful, stronger and faster. Lavi's hands were fiddling with the other's long hair and he pulled harshly, making his breath hitch. Lips parted and tongues danced. Tyki's mouth was like an inferno, burning like the flames of hell and Lavi just couldn't have enough. He tasted like spices and warm sunlight while Lavi was cold and salty with tears and Tyki couldn't get enough of him either. He was like the forbidden fruit, so sweet and so bitter and it made Tyki's mind mad. He waved his hands through the long red locks and enjoying their silky feeling. Catching the lace between two fingers, he pulled and the eye patch fell to the ground. He received no complaint as he brushed his fingers across the closed eyelid and felt Lavi's right eye twitch.
Lavi's hand began to wander across his torso and Tyki vaguely wondered when he unfastened his shirt. Cold hands were roaming his well-defined ribs and sent shivers down his spine. He knew where this was going and he hated to put an end to it. As he pulled away from Lavi's kiss, his hands stilled on his shoulder, ready to remove his coat and shirt. Green eyes looked right into his own, the pupils blown and darkened from lust. It was a very desirable sight and Tyki almost gave in.
-I don't have much time…
He kept his voice below a whisper, not wanting anyone to find him here. Lavi's eyes mirrored his regret but his voice was hoarse and it clouded Tyki's mind with desire.
-It won't take long.
There was a tone of finality in his words but Tyki stopped him as he began to pull his shirt down his shoulders. How he wanted to let Lavi take him was showing on his face. But he couldn't stay.
-I can't Lavi.
At the sound of his name, the young man shivered. Tyki took his hands and pressed them in his own, brought them to his lips and kissed them softly. They were starting to warm up at the proximity of Tyki's skin and he hated to let them turn cold again. Tears were starting to well up in Lavi's eyes and Tyki softly brushed his cheek, trying to convey all of his emotions in that one touch. He didn't want to go and Lavi didn't want him to go but they both knew he had to.
-But why?
Lavi's voice was broken with tears and kept in anger.
-Because the world is unfair and we're at war, Lavi. In fact, I should kill you right now. I was cursed by the memories of the Noah and you were given the knowledge of the Bookmen. We are not meant to be. There is a war going on and we are enemies. There will come a day when we will face each other and have no other choice but to fight. This is just about how unfair this world is, shōnen.
Tears fell down Lavi's face and left dark spots in the fabric of his shirt. He was tired, so tired of lying and hiding, of putting up a mask of polite innocence and annoying cheerfulness all the time. He was tired of being an Exorcist and tired of fighting, tired of hating the Noah and tired of loving one. Tyki's hands were so warm that it was hard to pull away from them. Lavi got on his feet and dusted his uniform. He retrieved his eyepatch and wiped his face with his sleeve. He looked pain and there was so much sadness in his eyes. His gaze was set right at Tyki and he looked so beautiful, kneeled down on the floor, his chest bare and his eyes lighten by the fire of the torches dancing inside his pupils making him look so damn desirable. He was so magnificent and so out of reach that it made his heart ache.
Tyki got up too and he was just tall enough that when he cupped Lavi's cheek, he had to bend down to reach his lips. Lavi stood unmoving as the Noah dragged his lips across his. A low sigh, full of regrets and fears, escaped the man. It was so overwhelming how Tyki's breath invaded Lavi's mind with his scent, that was so familiar but should only remember him of pain and terror and not those sweet and torrid nights he just wished he could forget. Tyki pulled away and buried his face in the crook of Lavi's neck, breathing in the intoxicated scent of his lover's skin. He always loved his smell and how he could feel his heart race when he brought his lips closer to the skin and bit onto the pulsating vein. He always loved how he would bring his hands to his hair and gently pull at the dark strands as if he was telling him to stop while it was just his way of asking for more.
Lavi's hand fell slack against his side and he closed his eyes in an effort to keep the tears in. He didn't want to cry. He was tired of crying for a man who wasn't worth it. But his sick mind still thought that he was, that all of this, that the man kissing his neck was worth the cries and the sleepless nights, the lies and the hidden bloodshot eyes. His pulse began to race through his veins and he felt Tyki's warm tongue sliding across his carotid all the way down to his collarbone and all the way up to his ear. His breathing was ragged and Lavi's was no better. His fists were clenched tight as he tried to resist the urge to cling on to Tyki like his life depended on it. His fingers went limp however and his eyes went wide as a low whisper was spoken right in his ear. He could feel Tyki's lips moving on his skin.
-Please do not cry when I die.
His mind was blank when the Noah pressed a chaste kiss on his lips and stepped back. His mind was blank when he got past him and disappeared into the darkness. His mind was black when he collapsed to the floor.
Black like the color of his eyes, of his too long hair, of his warm skin and black like he was, and everything about him, and everything that was him. Black like the Noah of Pleasure. Black like Tyki Mikk.
When he returned to his room that night, Lavi forgot to put on his mask. The Bookman asked what was going on and he answered in a monotonous voice that did not belong to Lavi, but perhaps to that man who had let a Noah claim his heart.
-Nothing, I'm just tired. I need some rest.
He was tired.
I've always been strong
But can't make this happen
Cause I need to breathe, I want to breathe you in
The fear of becoming
I'm so tired of running
Cause I need to breathe, I want to breathe you in
I want to breathe you in
A/N: Title is from Walking Thru Barbed Wire by Sum 41 and the lyrics are from Breathe You In by Thousand Foot Krutch
I hope you liked it, it ended up way longer than I expected… Let me know what you think, it's always nice getting a review ;) !
-Ogawdy
