How did I get here? How did this happen? How did I let this last so long? I've been in love with her for as long as I can remember so when she asked for "sex with no attachments" I said yes. I knew it was a bad idea. I knew this was going to hurt me. I knew she'd never love me as much as I loved her. But I agreed anyway…silly me.

I thought maybe she's catch feelings and want to be with me…oh well silly me. As I lay here with her thrusting into me all I can think is about how this is the only way I can be close to her. It feels so good but I feel to empty and heartbroken to really enjoy it. I feel myself orgasm and I call her name just how she likes.

"Oh fuck" I hear as she orgasms.

I feel her empty herself in me and I feel so stupid to think I could get her to love me…silly me. She rolls over and says

"Thanks Q I really needed that". Then she gets up to leave. But I stop her and say

"Where are you going" I sound so broken and on the verge of tears. She's half dressed and looking at me with sympathetic eyes. Then she says

" Q don't get caught up. This means nothing and I don't want to hurt you but a relationship can't happen. It WON'T happen. Maybe we should sto…" I cut her off

"NO" I basically yell. Then I say

"I can handle it I'm sorry please don't leave me san…please" Then its silent and she says

" I'm sorry I have to go" and with that she leaves. I lay there and as I cry, I feel used and empty I think…silly me to fall in love with Santana Lopez.