My evil little muse wouldn't shut up until I wrote this out and posted it. Hopefully he'll leave me alone now. I'm dedicating this one to Tribeca, who never ceases to amaze me with her clever, wonderful stories. I got inspired by her Pin Me To The Floor story.


She was just reaching for a bottle of water when she heard a knock on her door. She paused, but it wasn't repeated. Not Sheldon, then. Penny walked over and opened the door and stared in surprise at Raj. He waved shyly and handed her a piece of paper. Penny unfolded it and read it with growing joy. She looked up at his hopeful brown eyes and smiled happily.

"Do you mean this, honey?"

Raj nodded emphatically and Penny threw her arms around his neck tightly. Raj held her close and returned the hug.

The door across the hall opened up and Sheldon stared in shock at the sight of his two friends embracing rather ardently. They didn't even notice him as Penny tugged Raj into her apartment and shut the door. Sheldon frowned and walked across the hall. He raised his hand to knock but paused when he heard Penny's voice.

"Raj, you have no idea how happy you just made me! I can't believe you are asking me!"

Sheldon's eyes widened and he backed away. Surely they weren't talking about what he thought they were talking about. He shook his head. No, there was obviously some sort of explanation. He raised his hand again.

"Sweetie, this is wonderful! I can't wait to get you out of those clothes!"

Sheldon gasped and spun around. He sprinted back into his apartment and shut the door. This was bad. This was very, very bad!


Penny plopped down on the sofa beside Raj. "Sweetie, this is wonderful! I can't wait to get you out of those clothes!" she said with a twinkle in her eye. She handed him a glass of wine and waited until he had taken a sip.

Raj rolled his eyes and blushed slightly. "Please, Penny. This is very hard for me. I know everyone thinks Sheldon is the one who finds change difficult, but so do I. Other than a brief two weeks where I dressed like a Miami Vice character, this has always been my image."

Penny patted his knee. "Raj, if you don't want this, why are you asking me to make you over?"

He sighed and sipped some more wine. "I have been going to therapy. My therapist suggested a new look might change my outlook. I'm tired of being alone. I'm tired of being overlooked. I thought about asking Priya, but then I saw what she was doing to Leonard. She doesn't ask his opinion, just tells him he's going to wear whatever she picked out. I am hoping you will allow me some say."

Penny smiled softly. "Raj, to be honest, there really isn't much wrong with your clothes. The only real problem is color and size. You hide under layers and the colors you chose don't highlight your best features."

"What are they?"

Penny looked him over carefully. "Your eyes, your shoulders and your legs. Those are the things we need to spotlight. How would you feel about a new hairstyle to bring out your eyes?"

Raj gulped quietly. "Is it necessary?"

Penny shrugged. "Tell you what. Let's work on clothes first and then see how you feel. Okay?"

Raj nodded with relief. "I knew I made the right decision, Penny. You are the perfect choice for me."


Sheldon couldn't take it any more. This was wrong! They should know better! Penny and Raj? No! He raised his hand, determined to stop this insanity.

"I knew I made the right decision, Penny. You are the perfect choice for me." Raj said happily.

Sheldon's eyes narrowed and felt his temper boil over. What was wrong with her? How could she do this to him? Hadn't he put up with enough? That jerk Mike, then Leonard, and finally brain-dead Zack. How many more creeps and jackasses must she go through before she noticed him? He was tired of waiting. He was tired of being "friend-zoned". He was sick to death of being invisible to Penny. He slammed his open palm on the door.

BAM, BAM, BAM "PENNY!"

BAM, BAM, BAM "PENNY!"

BAM, BAM, BAM "PENNY!"

Penny jerked the door open in shock. "Sheldon? What's wrong? Are you okay?"

He pushed her back and looked for Raj. He snarled at his long-time friend, gratified he had interrupted before they began removing their clothes. He turned back to a wide-eyed Penny. "What is wrong with you?! What does it take to get through to you?" he demanded. "Raj? You think he can make you happy? It won't work, Penny! Why can't you see it?"

Penny lightly touched his tense shoulder. "Sheldon, what are you tal.."

Sheldon grabbed her waist and jerked her forward. One hand moved to the back of her neck and the other wrapped around her waist. Sheldon pulled her up onto her toes and well, there was no other word for it. He fused his lips to hers. He molded her body to his and ravished her mouth. The instant her lips parted for air, his tongue invaded. Soon, Penny was clinging to him, her body trembling from the onslaught of passion rolling off Sheldon. Slowly he transitioned from crushing her mouth, to coaxing her response.

He ran his hands over her body. His mouth slid from hers, across her cheek and down her neck. He nipped her pulse and then ran his tongue over the bite mark. Penny was breathing hard and fast, as she threaded her hands through is hair.

One of his hands slipped under her shirt and undid the clasp of her bra. Penny froze and then began pushing away from him. Sheldon growled and narrowed his eyes. Penny touched her swollen lips and looked at him anxiously. "Sheldon, are you doing?"

He swung his head over to Raj. "Get out!"

In a blur, Rag raced from the apartment. Sheldon slammed it behind him and locked all three bolts. He advanced on Penny, making her back up until she hit the wall. His hands came up to brace his weight on either side of her shoulders.

"What am I doing? I'm doing what I should have done the day we met. What I should have done the moment you looked at my white board. The moment you hugged me. The moment you spread vapo-rub on my chest. Or any one of a hundred other moments. I'm staking a claim, Penny. Tell me you don't want me. Tell me you don't feel something for me. Tell me quick because in about 15 seconds I'm going to pick you up and carry you to your bed. And then I'm going to peel off those tiny shorts and that skimpy top and I'm going to make love to you until you scream my name. I'm going to bury myself inside you and make us one."

Penny's pupils were so wide, he could only detect the faintest sliver of green. Her lips were parted and she was gasping for breath. He dipped his head to her ear.

"Tell me quick. 5...4...3...2.."

"Sheldon." Her voice was barely audible. He looked at her slowly, afraid to hear her send him away. "Do you listen to country music?" she asked.

He blinked a couple of times, surprised and confused by her question. "What?"

Penny smiled wantonly up into his eyes. "One of my favorites is Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy. Were you ever a cowboy?"

Sheldon grinned and swept her up against his chest. Three long strides and he let her bounce down onto the mattress. He whipped his shirts off and reached for the snap on his plaid pants. "Saddle up, baby.'