A/N: If you aren't a Mellie or a Mellitz fan, don't read. Don't leave me your reviews disagreeing with the story or what I have written. For those of you that do like it, leave me reviews, and let me know if you want me to write more. In addition, if you're a Mellitz shipper, read I'm Yours, which has a sequel coming out very soon. Chapter 1 is just kind of an introduction. Don't get discouraged; keep reading and read the next chapters. :)
It's been a little over a week since Fitz had kicked her out. Without a fight, she took her things and she took her child and silently went down to Blair House. She hasn't spoken a word to him since then. There was no need to. She had absolutely nothing to say to him. She understood his anger, she did. But she was only trying to protect them. She was only trying to keep them, their team, their partnership, from the danger that they would be in if what was in that file got out. She understood what she did wrong, even if she had no idea what "Damascus" would do with the list of names once she got them for him. That trial meant nothing to her. She didn't know what it was about, what it had to do with that man that had all of the secrets of her and Fitz's life in his hands. Yet, even though she had meant no harm by it, she understood to a point why Fitz was angry. What she didn't understand, however, was the level of her husband's anger. He knew that she wasn't aware of what he had wanted that list of names for; he knew that she didn't know that her actions would result in something so disastrous, so terrible. And how could he possibly be that angry with her for unknowingly and indirectly being the reason that 16 plus people were murdered, when he had knowingly shot down a plane with 329 people on it? Oh, yes, she knew about that. Her and Cyrus had discussed it after he had fired Cyrus and kicked Mellie out of the house. "His house" as he called it.
She knew about Olivia being there. Within hours of her departure to Blair House, Fitz had Olivia in the Residence and they were doing God knows what, God knows where. She couldn't even be angry anymore. She was so numb at this point that she had no feelings for anything anymore. Nothing mattered anymore. Her husband, her reputation, the fact that she was now the junior senator of Virginia. It didn't matter anymore. She had lost. There was no fixing things, there was no coming back from this. If she had lost Fitz, she had lost everything, and even though she hated to admit that, it was the truth. She tried to be the strong woman who didn't need her husband, but that was far from the truth. She had succeeded in doing just that up until a little after their son died, when Fitz became the husband that he had been originally before Mellie was raped, before Olivia Pope came along. Fitz was her rock, and after all of these years of putting up with his infidelities and his hateful words toward her, they had finally gotten back to where they were before. Olivia Pope was almost a distant memory, and they were almost back to normal. They were at the point where they were sleeping in the same bed, having meaningful conversations with one another, supporting each other, and even making love. But then it all changed.
It happened so quickly that she didn't even know what had actually happened. Something in her husband had snapped, and he had gone back to the monster that he had been months before. What snapped exactly, Mellie may never know. But it was almost undeniably due to something Olivia Pope-related. Mellie scoffed at the thought. She wished she wouldn't have told Fitz to go to war for her. Sure, he would've been depressed for a while, but he would've gotten over it. There was no doubt that he would've gotten over it. It was clear that he didn't really love her the way that Mellie thought he did. If he loved her as much as it seemed, going to war to get her back wouldn't have been a debate, there wouldn't have been a question about what to do. But instead, it was a debate, and Mellie had told him to go get her. That killed her. Telling him that killed her. But it proved that no matter what the consequences, no matter how much it physically and emotionally killed her inside to see her husband in love with another woman, to hear her husband tell her that he was in love with another woman, the one thing that she truly wanted was for him to be happy.
She took another sip of her hooch and glanced over at her sleeping son. He was curled up on a large, folded-up comforter on the floor, his arm around his teddy bear and his blanket draped over him. Every time that Mellie had tried to move him into a bed, he cried and refused to let her move him. He loved sleeping on the floor, for some odd reason. Mellie could never quite put her finger on it.
She had stopped bothering to pour her alcohol into a glass, and had just settled on drinking out of the bottle. This had been her routine for the last week. After Teddy had gone to sleep, she would drown her thoughts, her soul, her life, in alcohol. The only thing that mattered anymore was her son, and that was hard for even her to believe, considering she wasn't the motherly type. Even after Jerry died, she wasn't the motherly type. But now, the only thing that she had left in this world was her child, her baby boy. And every time that she looked at that child, she saw Fitz. She hated admitting it, but every time that she thought of her husband, even when it was from looking at Teddy, she felt sick. She had a painful, nauseous feeling in the pit of her stomach. In the beginning, that feeling had caused her to run to the bathroom, to actually get sick, but she had been able to better control it recently.
As she finished off what she had decided was enough, she wondered if maybe Fitz would come around, if he would realize that he had been a little too harsh on her, that she had been the only one in his life that had been there for him through thick and thin, that had been there for him every single day for the past 20 plus years. She knew that it was a long shot, that it most likely wouldn't happen. He was too caught up in Olivia Pope to remember that all of the things that Mellie had done for him, how much she really loved him, even after everything that he had done to her. With that realization, Mellie stood up and went over to her son, leaning down and gently tapping his shoulder.
"Teddy Bear, come on. It's time to go to bed." Teddy yawned and gripped his blanket and bear, holding his arms up toward his mother. Mellie pulled her child into her arms and carried him off to the bedroom, laying him in bed. She changed into a pair of pajama pants and a t-shirt, Fitz's Navy t-shirt that she had managed to sneak out of the closet, and laid next to Teddy. He immediately snuggled into his mother, and as the soft snores began to fill the room, Mellie stared at the wall, ready for another sleepless night, where she was staying up, and staying sad.
