I See Signs
Rating: M eventually but not for the first few chapters.
Paring: Neji/Shika/Neji
Summary: To fulfil his duty as part of the branch family Neji suffers a terrible fate. His faith in humanity is quickly diminished. But slowly he realises there is maybe one person who he can come to trust and possibly even love. He just needs a sign.
Through darkness I heard your voice,
To see your face I close my eyes,
Yes; I see signs now all the time.
Chapter 1
"The facts just simply aren't looking good Shikamaru" Tsunade said with a sombre expression, standing up from her desk and looking out through the large window behind her. "Hiashi-san is in a critical condition, Hinata herself saw Neji attack his uncle before disappearing."
Shikamaru frowned at her words it simply didn't make sense.
Of all the people, Neji would be the last person that would betray his clan, his village. It didn't sound like the Hyūga at all.
"I know what you're thinking Shikamaru, but… how well do we really know Neji. Truly know him. Isn't he the most closed up of us all? What if his Clan finally pushed him too far?" Tsunade turned back to face the Chūnin. "You have to find him before its too late. We can't have another Sasuke on our hands. I will do everything in my power to prevent that. Find him Shikamaru. Bring him back."
Shikamaru knew the Hokage was trying to act strong but he could see the worry lines on her face, he heard the anxiety in her voice.
Shikamaru didn't miss a thing; the last time he had seen Neji had been three weeks ago. This fact had only been a minute presence at the back of his mind. He figured that the Hyūga had been sent on a special mission, Neji was Jōnin after all; although it was rare for a single Jōnin to be gone for so long. Never would he have thought this would have occurred.
What are you playing at Neji? When I find you I'm gonna kick your ass. But…
"This simply doesn't make sense Tsunade-sama. What about the cursed seal? Doesn't that prevent him from attacking a member of the clan? There are too many unknown facts here to deal with."
"I'm afraid whatever the Hyūga's do within their clan is none of my business, as long as it does not bring harm to this village. I have no clue why the cursed seal was not used. I have disclosed with you all that they have informed me. Your frustration is understandable but this is why I chose you Shikamaru. I know you can figure this out. You have to do all you can to find Neji."
The Chūnin nodded once and rose from his seat without saying a word and moved towards the door.
"Shikamaru." Tsunade said suddenly. The said Chūnin halted in his steps. "I'm sure I don't need to tell you to keep this under wraps. If word leaks out that Neji may have defected… I don't even want to think about what chaos it will cause. I'm counting on your mind to find him. If… if it turns out that Neji has indeed betrayed us, I grant you the necessary force to detain him." She could not stop the waver in her voice. "If possible bring him back here, but if not-"
"That will not happen Tsunade-sama, Neji has not betrayed us. There must be another explanation." He opened the door and turned back one last time before leaving the room. "Neji would never."
Shikamaru tried to keep a clear mind as he packed the things he would need for his mission. But no matter how much he tried he could not stop the feeling of trepidation at the pit of his stomach. Something awful must have happened to Neji for him to run away, something so bad that even the stubborn Hyūga's pride hadn't stopped him.
Suddenly he slumped down onto his bed and lay back. He didn't even know where to start looking for Neji. It wasn't like he knew the boys habits or places the Jōnin liked to go. Yes, he would consider Neji a friend but just like Tsunade said, Neji never let anyone truly close to him.
Where the hell are you Neji?
A quiet knock on his apartment door broke him from his thoughts. Slowly he climbed off the bed and made his way to the front room and opened the door.
"Oh hi mum,"
"Shika-kun, will you be coming for family dinner this evening." His mom said, turning up her nose at the state of the living room.
"Actually I have another mission; I'll be leaving as soon as I've packed my things.
"Oh, already?"
"Yes, Sorry. I know I only just got back." Shikamaru said, walking back through the living room and recommencing packing his things.
Yoshino was faintly disappointed. Shikaku was also just back from a mission, and she had looked forward to finally sitting down for a family meal together. But she squared her chest; it was a tough time being a shinobi. They were in the middle of a war with the Akastuki and she had never been so proud of her son. As she looked up at Shikamaru who had long since out grown her, she couldn't help but smile at how much he was turning out to be just like his father.
Shikamaru finally finished packing and slung his backpack over one shoulder. "Well I'm off mum. I'm not sure how long this mission will last."
"It's okay Shika-kun" she said as she dragged her son into brief hug. "Just make sure you come back safe okay."
"I'll do my best."
As Shikamaru made his way out of the house he glanced fleetingly one last time at his mother who was heading in the opposite direction. She smiled softly at him and waved goodbye, the mid afternoon sun casted a calming golden glow to the setting. He waved back and turned away. It was the hardest part. Saying goodbye; never knowing if they'd see each other again. But the further he strolled from his apartment the more he brought his mind into focus.
Okay, let's get this done and over with. I suppose I should start by speaking to Hinata. Only she can shed a little light on this situation. There's something not right here, something I'm missing.
Cold.
Why am I so cold, is that not the same sun that has warmed my skin?
Why does breathing scorch my lungs?
Everything hurts, it hurts so much.
It aches father, and I'm so tired of this pain.
Maybe this is the end. Maybe I see you again soon.
He shut his eyes slowly, the light still piercing through his lids.
A small smile touched his lips; the first smile in such a long time.
"Hinata!" Shikamaru yell as he saw the milky eyed girl leave the Chūnin training dojo. He picked up his pace as he neared her.
"Shikamaru-kun?"
"I've been searching for you all day. There's something very important I need to speak to you about."
Hinata's eyes widened slightly she had never sensed such a nervous aura come off the Nara before, and she feared the worst, feared something had happened to her cousin. For what else could it be? "O-of course, Shikamaru-kun what's wrong?"
"I'm afraid we have to go somewhere completely private. I don't have much time, follow me." He leapt onto the roof of the nearest house and jumped onto the next, he sensed Hinata behind him as he soared through the air towards the outskirts of the village. Soon they passed into the trees of the forest and descended deeper into the growth. He didn't stop until he was sure there was no one within earshot, or even close by. Still when Hinata caught up to him he asked her to use her byakugan to make sure there was no one around.
Hinata deactivated her dōjustu and turn to face the Nara "There's no one around… Shikamaru-kun please tell me what is wrong. Why the need for secrecy. Is it… a-about Neji?"
"Yes, let's cut to the chase Hinata. You know Neji is missing right?" Hinata nodded. "I need you to tell me exactly what happened before he left; everything surrounding the incident concerning Neji's attack on Hiashi."
"O-okay well. It was a normal day I guess. Otou-san and Neji were sparing and I was in the next room. Suddenly I heard shouting. 'It is your duty to do what is best for the clan and for the village' Otou-san said. It was the first time I heard Neji shout back, he-he said that Otou-san was sick in the head."
Shikamaru blanched. That definitely was not Neji. What had caused Neji to snap like that?
"I had a similar expression at the time. Neji had never sounded so angry. And then Otou-san said something I will never forget and yet something that made no sense to me.
'It is a betrayal of the village to deny your duty. This is how your father got himself killed. Do you still think it was me that sanctioned the execution of my brother? Don't be so naïve Neji, It was the Hokage himself!'
That was the moment I burst into the room. A-and Neji….I had never seen him like that before, his chakra menacing; it froze me to the spot. And he moved like something I couldn't comprehend, I barely was able to keep up with his movements. It was like he somehow pulled a new dark energy from somewhere. Otou-san was overpowered. Neji nearly killed him. If I hadn't screamed for him to stop at that moment; I fear he would have. And when he turned to me his eyes were different, it was like the real Neji wasn't even there." Hinata felt tears prickling the back of her eyes as she spoke.
Shikamaru could barely keep up with the onslaught of information, facts that again just didn't make sense. Instead of filling in the holes Hinata had only managed to make them gape open further.
"Okay back up. One minute, Hiashi said that the Hokage had ordered the execution of Neji's father?"
"Yes, I know it does not make sense."
"But surely something like that must have been recorded! I have to speak to Tsunade-sama about this."
"You can't! I tried to ask Otou-san what he meant but he merely told me not to involve myself in business that did not concern me. He also told me not to mention it or the fact that Neji seemed to not be himself to Tsunade-sama or anyone. If he finds out I told you he would see that as disobeying a direct order. Please Shikamaru, I am trusting you with this because I know the only reason you would be asking these questions is if you have been ordered to find my cousin. I just want him back safely. But if you tell anyone, not only will I be banished from my clan or worse, I just know something bad will happen to Neji."
Shikamaru looked at the pleading girl with annoyance. He wasn't annoyed with her in particular, but more with her clan and the whole situation. Why did the Hyūga's have to keep so many confusing secrets, how could he work with so many unknowns.
"How troublesome. Okay I won't tell anyone but I need more information. Before this incident had Neji been acting strangely, absolutely anything out of the ordinary?"
"Well sometimes he would disappear for a week I wouldn't hear a word from him and then he would just return like nothing had happened. I asked him once, but just like Otou-san he told me not to concern myself, that he was fine. Apart from that he had become slightly more withdrawn and trained almost every hour of the day."
Shikamaru rubbed his face with the palm of his hand and sighed. "Okay, I just need you to tell me if you can think of any place where Neji would go."
"No, not really. He has never strayed too far from the village before. But I have searched everywhere near. I have no idea where he is."
Shikamaru signed once more. "Okay Hinata, I'll do all my best to find him." He nodded once before turning around and launching himself into the trees.
It wasn't that he didn't trust Hinata but he thought it was best to start out with the nearby villages. She could have missed a clue as to where Neji had gone.
He decided Tanzaku-gai would be the best place to start. There where so many people if Neji wanted to get lost in the crowd he easily could. And someone was bound to have seen him if he passed through.
Arriving at the village he pulled out a picture of the Hyūga, he had no other choice but to go around and check if anyone had seen him. Hours later and still he had no results. Either Neji had passed through so long ago that no one remembered or he didn't pass through at all.
The night had crept up on him and soon the streets where filled with drunkards and gamblers. The Nara decided to rest for the night at the first inn that caught his eye. As he paid for his room at the reception, he decided to give it one more try and ask the old lady at the desk if she had seen Neji. To his utter surprise she confirmed that she had.
"It's hard to forget a face like that, very easy on the eyes if I do say so myself."
Shikamaru would have snorted if he could be bothered. "When did you see him?" he asked seriously.
"Hmm, roughly one week ago? He was in a bit state, looked very troubled."
Shikamaru's heart picked up as he asked his next question. "Please, do you have any idea where he went?
"Hmm, Yes. I believe he asked directions on which was the quickest way to get to Tani in Kawa no Kuni [Land of rivers] to the west."
Shikamaru could have kissed the woman. "Thank you so much, I'm afraid I won't be taking the room. But here's some money for your help." The Nara dashed out of the inn. And headed at high speed towards Kawa no Kuni, he could almost feel all the unanswered questions within his grasp. He couldn't help think that Kawa no Kuni was such an obvious place for Neji to go. It practically stood by itself outside of the war. The rivers that spread throughout the land created a calm and tranquil atmosphere. It had the Hyūga written all over it.
I'm coming for you Neji.
The path toward the village Tani was through tall dense trees, but he could hear the gushing of the water not too far ahead of him. He knew traveling at this hour was dangerous by his self, but he only had one thing on his mind.
Neji.
Shikamaru suddenly stopped dead in his tracks, perching soundlessly on a high branch. Concentrating his mind and blocking out the sounds of the water and trees, he focused on sensing the chakra round him. Yes! There.
Oh no… no no no.
He picked up the pace, pooling chakra into his feet to make him move faster.
It's definitely Neji, but his chakra is fluctuating between low and non-existent. He's on the verge of death.
If possible he moved even faster, the feeling of dread gripping him tight. Within minutes he burst into a clearing and what he saw made him stop dead.
Shit.
Neji lay propped up against a tree, a small stream passing close to him. He was so pale and corpse looking. Rushing over to his comrades' side he pulled out his medical equipment and checked for a pulse.
Alive… Barely.
"Neji, Neji!" he shouted, not knowing whether to shake the Hyūga or not. He couldn't see any external injuries.
He suddenly heard a raspy deep breath being sucked in greedily. He almost jumped for joy when he saw Neji's eyes flutter open, but just like Hinata said… they looked different. Almost unseeing.
"Neji?"
What is that insistent noise?
Who is calling my name, can't they see I'm in a peaceful sleep?
Slowly his surrounding began to come back to him and with it the pain. He at least thanked kami that it seemed to be night, as there was no light burning his eyes.
"Neji?"
Who is that? How did they find me… where am I?
He tried to focus more on the person in front of him.
"Shika-maru?" he rasped.
He heard the Nara breathe a sigh of relief, and then it hit.
"Ahhhhh." He screamed at the top of his broken lungs. "Go, get away from here!" he rasped.
The Nara jumped to his feet, looking around as if for an enemy. "There is no one here Neji, tell me what's wrong." He said falling to his knees again.
"No, get away from me. I don't- want to hurt you. Get away. I can't hold it"
"Neji I want to help you, tell me what's happening. Why do you think you will hurt me?" Shikamaru cried. He couldn't comprehend what was happening. He gripped Neji's shoulders which had begun to shake, "Neji!"
The Hyūga's eyes had begun to roll back.
I can't hold it; I can't control it any longer. This blasted curse. Why did they do this to me? Why me.
As his eyes focused again, he knew it was too late. It was too late to save the Nara. He saw Shikamaru freeze with a mask of fear on his face.
He knew his eyes had turned from their milky shade to a clear crystal colour.
"I'm sorry" he gasped as his chakra spiked enormously. He leapt on the Nara and pinned him down.
"Neji, get of me. What the fuck is wrong with you?" Suddenly Shikamaru froze as his eyes settled on the two sharp canines slightly extruding from between Neji's thin lips. "No fucking way." He whispered.
He didn't have time to defend himself as Neji's teeth sank into the fear pulsing artery in his neck, within two breaths he had passed out.
But Neji didn't stop, too long he had denied himself and this was the consequence. His life force was near drained from his fight with Hiashi, and the need for life was so strong, as soon as his teeth entered the soft flesh it felt like he was becoming alive again. He felt energised and powerful. It was pure ecstasy.
And then he felt Shikamaru twitch slightly beneath him.
Shikamaru…
He leaped away from the Nara, his back smacking into the tree in behind of him. A hand covered his blood-stained mouth as he stared down at Shikamaru body.
No. What have I done?
Quickly he scooped up the body in front of him and commenced the journey he never finished toward Tani.
Please don't die Shikamaru, that' above everything else is a burden I cannot bear.
"Urge" Shikamaru groaned as consciousness slowly resumed him. What on earth- He sprang upright and looked around the fairly plain room. the motion casued a sharp pain through his neck.
He was lying on a small single bed that felt hard beneath him. Slowly his eyes rested on the boy sitting clear across the room.
"Neji." The Nara processed all that of happened before he passed and shook his head in disbelief. "No fucking way." He repeated. "You have to tell me exactly what's going on Neji."
"Tch." The Hyūga turned his head away, infuriating Shikamaru. The Nara pulled himself up from the bed in anger.
"You nearly killed me, you owe me that much! Just an explanation."
"I owe you nothing." Neji sneered. He picked up his bag from the floor and headed towards the door. "Well now that I know you are fine, I'm leaving."
"You're not going anywhere Hyūga. I'm taking you back to the village."
"Trust me, you'll be doing no such thing." Neji said without even turning back.
Shikamaru charged across the room and grabbed Nejis' shoulder. "Please Neji, I just want to help. Tell me what's going on. I've known you nearly my whole goddam life and you are not a Kyūketsuki! [Vampire]"
"You're right. I'm not a Kyūketsuki."
"Then what the hell happened at that clearing, and your chakra. It went crazy."
"Shikamaru I'm doing this for your own good" Neji said turning back towards his friend. "You don't want to get yourself involved with his." He said with a near stoic voice.
"It's a bit too late for that, seeing as you near damn ripped my head off." If he hadn't been watching the Hyūga's face closely he would have missed his eyes widen slightly.
"I am truly sorry for –"
"I don't need you to be sorry. I just need answers!" Shikamaru shouted. A silence settled between them and he could almost hear Neji's mind battling with whether to confine in him or not.
"Two months ago when I turned seventeen, Hiashi and the Hyūga elder summoned me to one of the deepest and most secret chambers in the Hyūga compound." Neji began walking over to the bed. Once Shikamaru settle beside him he continued. "They told me it was finally time to fulfil my duty as member of the branch family and a shinobi of Konoha. Like the naïve fool I was I just bowed my head and said that I would be honoured to be of any service to the clan. It was then that Hiashi attacked me and knocked me out cold. When I woke up I recognised being in the old shrine to the north of the compound. They had me in a ward made the combined chakra of Hiashi and the Elder. I didn't even try to break out; I had no idea what they would do to me. But I knew they wouldn't kill me. What use was I dead?
Three people came into the shrine dressed in white. One of them said it was time to perform the ritual. They started chanting, but after I heard the first sentence the rest was irrelevant, 'We ask for the power beyond life on this world.' They said..."
"But that.. That sounds like."
"-the beings of a chant from a forbidden scroll. I knew I had to get out then, but it was impossible. When it was over I was a weak mess; it was pain I had never felt before. I prayed for death, I wondered how no one could hear my screams and all the while they stood there and watched. When the pain stopped I felt so drained and I still couldn't break out of the ward. Hiashi explained to me that it was for the benefit of the village. He said that they had to continue to test the scroll on the branch family until they found a way to counteract the side effects." Neji's fisted the clothing on his thighs and Shikamaru watched as his knuckles turned white.
"What did the scroll do?"
"It gives me abnormal power but as a side effect it drains my life force. One of the plus sides is that the cursed seal doesn't work on me anymore… but in a way I'm only half alive. In order to sustain life I have to take some of the spiritual essence of another. This can be done by blood or-" The Hyūga stopped dead and Shikamaru almost laughed at the slight blush on his cheeks, but the situation was too important.
"But that's the Jinsei no sukurōru [scroll of life], that's impossible!" The Nara jumped to his feet, pacing the room. "That is a scroll of legend, a forgotten scroll. How did they Hyūga clan come by it. "
"They said the scroll has been in the clan for generations."
"You have to come back…We have to tell the Hokage-"
Neji growled at the mention of the Tsunade. "The Hokage knows! Don't you see? This is why I couldn't stay in that damned village a moment longer. The corruption runs all the way to the top. I tried living a normal life after they put this curse on me but it's impossible. Don't you see what they've turned me into? I'm a monster, I'll never be the same and none of them give a fuck! Much less Tsunade" he shouted. "You're a naïve fool to believe anything Tsunade says, Shikamaru." He hissed.
The Nara eyes became slits.
No way can Tsunade know about this. That's impossible. And how can he call himself a monster.
Shikamaru just stared at the Hyūga; he couldn't help but notice that he looked the same as ever, the same milky skin and charcoal hair. Even his eyes had returned to their usual hue. The only thing different was the tortured pain behind them.
"Neji I cannot believe that Tsunade knows about this, we have to speak to her-"
"I am NOT going back to that village Shikamaru! I'm not scared for myself. I'm scared for them! I don't know what I will do if I'm near again. You cannot possibly imagine the burden that I have bared the last few months. To know that your barely human, to act normal while as the days go by you crave the sustenance of life more and more… the things they made me do-"
Shikamaru frowned at what seemed that fear and pain briefly flashed across Neji's face. "What? What did they make you do?"
Neji was across the room before he could even stop him. "Go back Shikamaru. Tell them whatever you need to tell them. But I will not be going back with you."
The door slammed behind the creamy-eyed man will a harsh bang and Shikamaru felt floored.
What on earth am I going to do?
It had begun to rain and as Neji walked toward the furthest side of the village, he couldn't help but feel shaken by the conversation with Shikamaru. He knew that the Nara wouldn't give there was just no way he was going back.
The streets where near deserted at the late hour of the night, he relished in the quite. The moon cast an ethereal glow and he felt his heart rate decreasing. He didn't like that Shikamaru had made him remember all the dreadful things he had done.
Don't think about it.
If he listened closely he could hear the relaxing sound of river nearby and the gentle hum of the rain… the sounds of footsteps following him.
"My answer hasn't changed Shikamaru."
"I know that, but you're not thinking rationally Neji," came Shikamaru's voice from behind him. "I made it my business to research all the forbidden scrolls even the lost ones. I know you can't survive by yourself Neji, you need help"
"I don't need ANYONE" The Hyūga hissed, turning around. "This is what happened when you put your trust in people!" he said spreading his arms. "You can trust no one but yourself. I will not be used like this again by a village that I have protected my whole life."
Shikamaru's eyes showed sympathy; sympathy he didn't want nor need. "Then don't come back to the village just come back with me. In roughly a week you will need to consume more…" Shikamaru gulped at his next words "... blood … and if you use your powers even sooner than that. come with me if you don't want what happened today will occur again. You have to be in control of yourself! and if you don't get sustenance you won't even truly die; you'll just be stuck in the limbo between life and death.
Come with me Neji. When you need I will let you have some of my blood. I have my own place so I can hide you there until we figure out exactly what to do."
Neji couldn't help but scowl at Shikamaru words; he didn't understand why the Nara would go through all that for him. Sure they were somewhat friends, but they were not particularly close.
"I just want to help Neji. What kind of person would I be to just leave you by yourself? That wasn't the way I was raised. I was raised to help my friend when they need it, and you defiantly need my help."
It wasn't that Neji didn't trust Shikamaru; it was more like he didn't trust anyone. But he had to admit, he couldn't survive on his own. He needed help and Shikamaru was offering it to him.
"Fine, I'll go with you."
They stayed in the room Neji had bought for the night without talking much, they were both lost in their own thoughts. Both troubled.
When Neji was sound asleep, Shikamaru sent a message to Tsunade, that he had found Neji and that they would be returning the following day. He informed her that Neji was going to be staying with him in secret and that he would explain when he returned.
They left in the morning and Neji couldn't help but feel lighter. Shikamaru was the first person outside of the clan to know about him, and the fact that the Nara could still call him a friend meant more to him than he ever realised it would. As they jumped through the trees towards the village he glanced sideways at his traveling companion. The Nara had been unusually quite the whole morning; well he supposed it wasn't too unusual. Shikamaru was probably just deep in thought; he had thrown at him a load of information. More than he probably knew how to deal with.
They slowed down as they drew near to Konoha. The closer they got the faster Neji's heart rate picked up and a cold sweat began to break over him. He stopped completely not too far from the village. His limbs were shaking.
"What's wrong Neji?" Shikamaru said, coming to stand before him.
"I- I don't know if I can do this."
Shikamaru was quite taken aback but the vulnerability in Neji's words and he had the strong urge to comfort the Hyūga, and protect him.
He must have suffered a lot for him to be this scared.
"Don't worry Neji; I'll keep you safe at my place. I won't let your clan touch you. I promise."
Their eyes locked and the sincerity in Shikamaru's eyes was what caused him to nod. "Okay, let's go."
"Here put this on." Shikamaru said, talking off his traveling cloak which conveniently had a hood to cover Neji's face.
They passed through the village gates with no trouble, Shikamaru greeted the guards and they paid no mind to Neji at all. They travelled in the shadows, Shikamaru masking him from wondering eyes. As they drew near to the Nara's flat, Neji sensed someone following them.
He sped up slightly passing Shikamaru.
"Neji what's wrong?" But then Shikamaru also felt the presence following them.
That's impossible; the only one who knows we're here is…
The Hyūga was just about to activate his Byakugan when he felt something hit him in the neck. Stopping to a halt he pulled out a poison dart from his neck. Suddenly they were swarmed by nearly a dozen Shinobi and Neji whose muscles had already began to feel weak from the poison was thrown to the floor.
His hearing began to muffle and he didn't hear Shikamaru screaming his name in panic. Through all the people he couldn't see where Shikamaru had gone, his vision had begun to fade anyway. But just before he passed out his sight cleared suddenly, and he saw Shikamaru's face burst out through the crowd.
"Why?" he managed to say before he fell into darkness.
"Neji!" Shikamaru yelled. But the Hyūga was already being dragged away.
I've got so much to say to you,
The wind blows away my sigh,
Yes; I see signs now all the time.
So this is the beginning of my new fic. My first Naruto fic and I'm a bit nervous, so please let me know what you think. I hope you found it interesting.
Obviously there are a lot of things different from the canon but it's still set in the same world.
inspired by the song Signs, by bloc party.
This hasn't been Beta-ed so if there are mistakes I apologise and if any of you would care to be my Beta please message me :)
Ja ne
