The Art of Seduction by WeasleyForMe

Fred and George try out some pick-up lines on Hermione! George/Hermione


"Oh, Merlin! That's the worst one yet, Fred!" George said with a grimace.

Fred scoffed as he replied, "It was no worse than the ones you came up with!"

The Gryffindor students were hanging around the Common Room one night, completely bored, and Fred and George happened to be comparing pick-up lines.

"Ok, fine. How's this one? 'If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together'," George said as Fred started howling.

"That's so bad! Honestly Georgie, I'm surprised you've managed to snog a girl with lines like that one!"

George rolled his eyes. "Like you can do better?"

"As a matter of fact, I can," Fred told his twin. "This one always works on the ladies: I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest lady in the world tonight," Fred said in a cheesy voice.

George laughed until he was clutching his sides. "I don't want to know what kind of girls you get with that one."

Fred tried not to laugh as he said, "Ok, fine. That one never actually works."

When George's laughter finally died down, he said, "Hey, let's test these out on a girl."

"Who?" Fred asked as he scanned the Common Room. His eyes fell on Hermione at the same time that George's did.

"Let's try them out on your crush," Fred said as he jabbed George in the ribs.

"Shh! Be quiet! Besides, she's not my crush!" George hissed as he blushed.

"I'd say your pink face just about proves my point," Fred said, with an evil grin. "Regardless, if a line would work on Hermione, it would work on any girl."

"I can guarantee that they won't work on a girl with half a brain, Fred," George mumbled as they made their way over to her.

Hermione was sitting at a table, carefully finishing the conclusion to her Potions essay when she leaned back in her chair and stretched. She was startled to see Fred and George heading in her direction. Fred looked quite smug, while George looked slightly apprehensive. "I doubt this will end well," she thought as they sat down on either side of her.

"Well, here I am. What are your other two wishes?" Fred asked her with a completely straight face.

Hermione's eyes narrowed as she asked, "Excuse me?"

Before she received an answer, George asked, "Are you accepting applications for your fan club?"

She turned to George and asked, "What are you two going on about?"

"Help me Hermione, something is wrong with my eyes- I just can't take them off you," Fred told her, drawing the attention back to himself.

She merely glared at him, crossing her arms. "Is this some kind of joke?"

"Your lips look so lonely. Would they like to meet mine?" George asked, once again beginning to blush a bright shade of pink. Hermione started to blush as well.

Fred chuckled as he said, "Something tells me you're sweet. Can I have a sample?" This finally earned a snicker from their target.

"Ok. Hilarious. Haha, I get it," she told them as she shook her head. "I guess you think it's funny to use pick-up lines on the bookworm."

George shook his head. "No, we just wanted to test them out on someone as intelligent as you. We knew they wouldn't actually work."

Fred spoke up. "Speak for yourself, George. I for one was hoping Hermione would give in to my incredible charms."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Sorry, but not likely. Those lines were too cheesy." She smiled as they nodded in agreement. "Next time you're trying to snag a girl, you should try to say something truthful and sincere. It works much better."

Fred looked confused at that as he stood up. "Yeah right, Hermione. That will never work." He wandered off in the direction of a group of girls.

George on the other hand stayed seated next to her. His heart was pounding as he said, "Hermione, I think you are heaven on earth.".

Hermione giggled. "Perhaps you should have stuck with the lines."

He rubbed his chin. "I have a crush on you, and I want to be your boyfriend." The pink tinge never left his cheeks.

"Well, now you just sound desperate," she said through her laughter.

"But Hermione, you told me to be truthful!" George said with a melancholy expression.

Hermione's giggling ceased. "You were being truthful?" she asked quietly.

He swallowed the lump in his throat. "I've been being truthful since I walked over here."

Hermione stared at him, blinking a number of times before she realized that perhaps he was being honest. "Even the part about my lips looking lonely?" she asked, barely above a whisper.

George smiled at her nervous expression. "Especially that part."

Hermione licked her lips. "I suppose they could use some company." That was all it took for George to press his mouth to hers. Their kisses started out soft but soon became more determined. He dragged his tongue along her lips and snogged her senseless. Hermione's brain chanted, "George is kissing you!" a few times before she lost all control of her thoughts. He made sure that her lips had plenty of company, also paying extra attention to his fingers as they wound through her hair. George thought he could have stayed there all day, but he pulled back for some air.

"Wow, that was unexpected," he mumbled as he kissed Hermione's chin and neck, causing her to shudder.

"Quite. But in a good way," she told him. Then they realized that a number of the Common Room occupants were gaping at them, including Fred who was grinning like a loon. "Perhaps we could find somewhere else to go?" Hermione asked as she realized they had just made quite a spectacle.

"Absolutely," he confirmed as he stood, pulling her to her feet. As they headed for the portrait hole, he made a big production of checking out Hermione's rear end. "Are those space pants you're wearing? Because your arse is out of this world!"

Hermione's eyes went wide with embarrassment as she playfully swatted at George. "Oh, just you wait… I'll make you pay for that one."

George had a grin on his face for the rest of the week.


Well, I really hope you aren't sick of reading my stories, because I'm not yet sick of writing them! Just a ridiculous little one-shot that was inspired by the odd conversation topics in Twin Exchange. (Thanks for the help with the pick-up lines!)

Please review! REVIEW! And let me know of any silly lines you've heard, because I get such a kick out of them, lol.

Review... :D