AN: Okay, I know I posted a new story not that long ago, and I am working on that one...and Life Saver, I promise. This has just been in my head for a while, and I needed to get it out somewhere. So, here you go! Enjoy!
CMA: I own my story, not the characters or the show they come from whose lives I mess with.
5x01
Lena & Callie
Lena sat on the front porch swing, swaying in the South California breeze. She was having a hard time digesting everything her wife had told her just a few hours ago, that night's escapade sitting like a rock in her stomach. Consequently, sleep evaded her, no matter how much her wife had assured and reassured her that their daughter was indeed alive and well.
Callie had a knack for trouble; this was not news to either woman. In fact, trouble seemed to follow the girl like a lost puppy, but hearing about her latest situation – actually getting into a van with the girl her mother rescued from that life, knowing what she was getting into with nothing but a tracking app and a cell phone – Lena felt lost. She couldn't wrap her mind around how a cop and assistant principal couldn't see how self-destructive their teenage daughter was.
She reached up and wiped away a stray tear as she rocked the swing. They'd gotten lucky – very lucky – and she didn't want to imagine what else could have happened – how Callie very well couldn't be laying in her bed right now; how her wife could have been two seconds too late, and she could be standing behind a window, identifying her daughter's body at the morgue.
But you're not, and she's not.
She wiped away another tear, reminding herself that her seventeen-year-old was, in fact, asleep upstairs – or so she thought. A few seconds later, the front door opened, and the child-in-question stepped out onto the front porch.
Lena looked at the girl, noting the worn look on her face, and smiled slightly as Callie stopped abruptly in her tracks.
"I'm sorry," the teen stammered. "I was just…"
"It's okay," Lena said softly while making room on the swing for the girl. "Come sit."
Callie hesitated.
"Come on," the mother tried coaxing again. "You're okay."
Slowly, Callie made her way over and sat nearly on the edge of the swing, an agonizing silence once again enfolding them. Lena wanted nothing more than to take the girl into her arms and never let go, but she also knew that Callie didn't respond well to that.
Callie stared straight ahead dazed, seemingly separated from reality, and that scared Lena. She'd seen that look before – the day her daughter had gotten on the back of a stranger's motorcycle.
They'd gotten lucky that day, too. Lena knew it may not have been Aaron who picked the girl up, but someone who may have taken off with her, and –
Lena closed her eyes, the sudden reality of how many close calls they've had with this particular child hitting her. She couldn't let her mind work on the "What if's" of her daughter's choices.
God, this silence was horrible. It had to end, but where did she start? She and Callie hadn't connected on the same level as Stef and Callie had, and so, Lena's methods of parenting sometimes came up short.
But she had to say something…
"Did you have a good bath, Love?" she decided to lead with as she reached up and ran her fingers through Callie's still-damp curls.
Callie nodded.
"That's good." Silence. "I love you." She tucked some hair behind Callie's ear. "You know that, don't you?"
Callie nodded and whispered, "I love you, too."
"Callie, I need to ask you something, and I need you to be honest with me."
The teen shifted uncomfortably. "Okay."
Lena braced herself. "Do you want to die?" When no immediate answer came, she internally began panicking, and she felt her breath catch. "You do." Lena closed her eyes again, willing herself not to cry.
"Not consciously," came Callie's admission in barely a whisper. "At least, I don't think."
"What…"
"It's almost like a reflex. I'm just so used to protecting Jude."
"Jude had nothing to do with what you did tonight, Callie."
"No, I know." Callie's voice started breaking. "It's just…"
After a moment, when she didn't continue, Lena coaxed, "Just…"
Taking a deep breath, Callie let out, "She's the same age as Jude. She's a baby…"
"So are you."
"But she hasn't been through what I have…"
"Honey – "
"I had to protect her!" The teen began breathing heavy. "I…"
"You had to come home, Callie. That's it." Lena took a shaky breath, trying to keep her emotions in check. "Honey, if mom had been two minutes later, mom and I would have had a very different conversation tonight!" She reached out and took Callie's hand. "Very different. I wouldn't be holding your hand; I wouldn't be sitting here; you wouldn't be sitting here! You would be lying on a cold slab in the middle of a medical examiner's office while Mom and I would be identifying your body!"
"I know." The words barely escaped the teen's mouth.
"Do you?" Lena challenged.
Callie turned around to face Lena, and the mother could see the girl's eyes swimming. The teen had been scared that night, and a part of Lena was glad about that fact. Maybe now, these behaviors may change.
"Please Baby," Lena pleaded as a tear ran down her own cheek and she reached up to brush a way one of Callie's, "please don't make me bury another child." She swallowed. "I'm not strong enough."
"I won't, Mama," came Callie's soft, tearful reply. "I won't."
"Promise me."
Callie nodded. "I promise."
Lena smiled, pulling the teen into her arms and holding onto her daughter for dear life. Moments with her eldest daughter were few and far between, but she was glad that Callie was seeking more and more moments with her.
The teens shoulders began shaking slightly, and Lena held her tighter, just letting the girl come unglued from the night while sending up a prayer to whatever higher power existed that this would be the last close-call with her daughter.
AN: What'd you think? Bad, right?
The next one may be from earlier in the series. I think I was given a request a while ago to write Callie telling the moms that she wants to come home (Season 1). That may be my next one...I don't know.
