It's A Small World
Summary:
Dr. Mindbender has a new invention, and he's testing it on Joes. A bit of an ensemble piece.
A/N:
Another fic from my holiday story giveaway offer. The prompt for this story came from lovelykitta, who supplied the opening and closing lines and requested Bazooka be in it. Thanks to Amykay73 and VR Trakowski for looking this over for me.
Rating:
PG is probably excessive considering where the story is set.
Disclaimer:
I'm sure Hasbro, Marvel, etc. are delighted I have nothing to do with GI Joe considering the situations I put them in.


"Cobra tried WHAT?!"

General Clayton "Hawk" Abernathy sat down behind his desk, scowling at the motley assortment standing at attention opposite him. His gaze drifted to the stack of reports on his desk, and he shook his head incredulously before focusing on the team leader.

"To brainwash children, sir," Lady Jaye answered him.

It was close to April Fools' Day, but he couldn't believe anyone on the team would be stupid enough to pull a prank like this on him – especially not the recently promoted Sergeant Hart-Burnett. Except except, did she actually look almost amused?

"It was one of Dr. Mindbender's plans," she added blithely, despite the fact her entire team was still oozing on his floor.

He liked Lady Jaye, he really did, and not only because she was one of the few people on the team with whom he could enjoy a cup of tea and not be disgusted by slurping. She focused on her work, never complained and her mind was top-notch – normally the type of recruit who would have been recommended for Officer Candidate School.

But, since birth, she'd been in the upper echelons of society. Powerful politicians clamored for her family's support; entertainment superstars longed to be in the same social circle; the leading intelligentsia babysat her while she was growing up on Martha's Vineyard. Knowing all her life that she was at the top of the proverbial pack had left Lady Jaye with a type of self-assurance that had, to put it mildly, baffled her drill instructors.

Not that she was a snob – although the braver team members described her as 'uppity' when she was annoyed – or that she ever tried to shirk her duties. She was perfectly respectful to her superiors, and she always followed orders to the best of her ability. But Lady Jaye also had a natural deportment that tended to make even officers feel like they were the ones on review.

No, her instructors hadn't recommended her for OCS, despite her intelligence and education, deciding she wouldn't fit into the military's supervisory structure. Instead, she'd been steered onto the specialist track before he'd recruited her for the G.I. Joe team.

Looking at the damage reports and angry missives on his desk, he had to wonder if maybe her drill instructors had been right after all.

"Why do I have a feeling this is going to be a long story?" he grumbled, waving her to start.


"Look, Jaye, not that I got anything against ya, but why are you in charge here?" Shipwreck asked humorously as he leaned beside her.

"It's an intelligence mission," she said.

"Something you're lacking!" a voice called out from behind him.

Shipwreck turned around to face Bazooka, Crankcase and Heavy Metal, aping their laughter. "Oh, call a medic. That cut so deeply I'm gonna bleed to death," he muttered. "Bunch of teacher's pets."

"I can put you out there on the S.H.A.R.C. if you don't like it here with my guys," Jaye said, indicating the laughing soldiers. They had been part of the team of recruits she had led in a training exercise that ended with them defeating a platoon of Dr. Mindbender's B.A.T.s. It had been ages since she had worked with them, and their respective skills were perfect for this assignment.

"With Deep Six? Please, I'd rather well, I'd rather do just about anything else. Even put up with a bunch of Army suck-ups," Shipwreck said. "But we're at the Seal Beach Naval Weapons Station. Naval as in not Army. You're as much a fish out of water here as a, a "

"An obstreperous sailor stationed at a secret base in the middle of the Utah desert?"

His grin faltered as he sounded out her sentence. "Er, a whatis? That doesn't sound so good."

"It's accurate," she said, smiling behind her binoculars.

"Yeah, well if you want to trade twenty-five cent words, you've got beret boy for that. Now, if you want a real man to show you a good time, I'm your guy."

Lowering her binoculars, she made a show of looking at her watch. "Flint wins."

"Huh?"

"We had a bet going on how long it would take you to make a pass at me."

"So, what does he win? I can give you some pointers, a little one-on-one practice," he said with a friendly leer.

"No, actually, it's more like what you get," Lady Jaye said. "I think he mentioned Thule."

"Greenland? Far ass north end of Greenland?"

"'Ass' usually implies the south end."

"I'd freeze my barnacles off in Thule! Flint wouldn't do that to me. We're buds," Shipwreck exclaimed. After a beat, he lowered his voice. "You wouldn't let him. Would you?"

She gave him an enigmatic look before picking up the radio. "Cutter, what's going on out there?"

"Nothing suspicious on the water, Lady Jaye. The Coast Guard is checking all the large vessels out here. You shoulda joined me and worked on your tan."

"Maybe next time." Turning to face one of the massive cranes near the waterfront, she looked toward the top and waved her hand. "Alpine? What about you?"

"The only things creepy around here are Shipwreck's pickup lines."

"Har, har, har."

"Lowlight?" Lady Jaye asked, turning to another crane farther down the dock.

"Not a snake in sight."

"Deep Six, what's going on under the surface?"

"Nada."

"So, what were you saying about intelligence?" Shipwreck quipped.

"The FBI had multiple confirmed sightings of Dr. Mindbender, Tele-vipers and Dreadnoks in the area," Lady Jaye said, more to herself than to the others. "They have surveillance photos from the electronics store the Dreadnoks raided last night."

"Seal Beach is the obvious target. More than five thousand acres packed to the gills with high explosives," he replied seriously.

"Except they haven't made a move. If they aren't after the munitions, why are they hanging around here?"

"Marine Corps Air Station Tustin and the Los Alamitos Army Airfield are in the area," Crankcase said.

"But what do they have that would interest Cobra?" Heavy Metal interjected. "If they were after a military base, it would be Seal Beach."

"So, if they're not here, are they after a civilian target?" Shipwreck asked.

"Maybe they're planning on attacking Disneyland," Bazooka said.

Lady Jaye turned to him with a bit of a smile. "Do you want to check it out?"


"Wait, you sent Bazooka to Disneyland?" Hawk interrupted.

"Along with Heavy Metal, sir."

"In the middle of a mission?"

"Yes, sir. Disneyland is a major tourist attraction. It's a prime location for a Cobra attack. At that point, it was clear Cobra didn't intend to move on the munitions supply at Seal Beach. There was no indication that they'd left the area, so we needed to check other possible potential targets."

"Let me get this straight – you ordered two heavily armed soldiers to go into a tourist attraction."

"Oh, no, sir," Lady Jaye said evenly. "I told them to leave their weapons in the Mauler in the parking lot."

"Mauler in Disney's parking lot " Hawk shook his head quickly. "Go on."


"How come they get to go to Disney?" Shipwreck complained as he slouched in the Mirage's sidecar.

"They've never been before," Lady Jaye said as she drove along the base's fence line. "Besides, do you think I'd turn you loose on those unsuspecting kids?"

"Hey, I'm a natural with kids. They love me. Uh, look, seriously. You won't let Flint send me to Greenland, right? I like my barnacles just the way they are."

"Do you really think I have any control over his jealousy?"

"Uh, yeah?" he said hopefully.

"Buck up, Shipwreck. Maybe he'll never hear about it."

"You won't tell?"

"No, I mean if Cobra does attack us here, we'll be blown sky high."

"Oh, that's real reassuring, Jaye. Gotta tell ya, you got that whole keep-the-troops-up thing down pat."

"You're definitely going to Thule if I pass that comment along to Flint," she said with a smirk.

"What? No , well, yeah, hehehehe, but that's not what I meant and you know it!"

"Why don't you try keeping an eye out for Cobra?" she suggested as they pulled off base and onto the highway. Picking up speed, she drove the motorcycle through traffic, looking for any suspicious activity on the approach to the base.

They swept the area three times before heading back on base, parking near the A.W.E. Strikers.

"Alpine, talk to me," Lady Jaye said after picking up the radio.

"Tustin's even more boring than Seal Beach was," his voice crackled back. "But we have a bunch of angry jarheads wanting to know why we get to wander around their base."

"Just don't tell them any of your jokes, and you'll be fine," she said before checking in with Lowlight, who quickly confirmed there was no sign of Cobra at Los Alamitos.

"Heavy Metal, what's going on at your end? Heavy Metal? Bazooka? Guys, answer me."

"Maybe security made them turn off their radios," Crankcase said.

"And maybe Cobra Commander likes dancing around in a tutu," Shipwreck said. "You don't think Cobra would really try to attack Disneyland, do you?"

"Not with a handful of Tele-vipers and the Dreadnoks," Lady Jaye said, thinking out loud. "Why would Mindbender be working with those guys? The Dreadnoks stole an assortment of electronics equipment. Tele-vipers are communications experts."

"Pirate radio?" Crankcase suggested.

"Maybe he's going to put a bunch of subliminal messages in the Disney rides!" Shipwreck laughed.

Crankcase and Lady Jaye looked at one another. Shipwreck stopped laughing when they faced him again.

"Crankcase, how quickly can you get us to Disney?" Jaye asked as she jumped in the A.W.E. Striker.

"Hang on, and I'll show you!"

"Lowlight, Alpine, get to Disneyland ASAP!" she called on the radio as Crankcase floored the accelerator, pausing long enough to grab the back of Shipwreck's collar when he nearly fell off the vehicle.


Hawk let out a long sigh. "You decided to lead an all-out invasion of Frontierland based on a suspicion?"

"No, sir. It was Fantasyland."

"Come again."

"When we got to Disneyland, it didn't take us long to find the Mauler."

"No, I don't suppose too many people take the family tank on vacation," he said sarcastically.

Lady Jaye regarded him calmly before continuing. "As I was saying, sir, it didn't take long to find the Mauler. Their weapons were stowed safely away inside it. We went to the main gate and asked park security if there had been any incidents."


"Look, lady, I don't care if you're with the Army or the Salvation Army, we don't tell strangers nothing that goes on in the park," the guard said harshly. "Now why don't you get outta, outta, outta…"

"Shipwreck," Jaye sighed dramatically. "Didn't anyone ever tell you it's rude to shove the barrel of an M-16 up someone's nose?"

"Is it?" he asked.

"Somewhat," she said, putting her hand on the rifle's barrel and pushing it down. The guard relaxed until he realized just how low she pushed it. Jaye cleared her throat until he stopped staring at his groin in horror. "Look, you're just doing your job. That's all we're trying to do, too. We're not trying to hassle you, but we have reason to believe that terrorists are planning an attack on the park."

"Terrorists? You're worried about terrorists?"

"Yes, and these aren't the Pirates of the Caribbean type of trouble. We're talking real death, destruction and the whole she-bang. Now, you can either let us in, and we'll take full responsibility for anything that happens, or you can keep us out and you be responsible."

"Here's a map. Have a nice day," he gulped out in one breath.

"Not so fast," Lady Jaye said with a pleasant smile. "What's been going on?"

"I don't know nothing about no terrorists. Please move the gun away from my uh, uh," he stammered.

"Barnacles?" she suggested lightly, pressing the barrel away from him.

"Thank you. There was a fight reported about thirty minutes ago. We sent security to the area, but they didn't find anything."

"Where was that?"

"Fantasyland. By the 'It's a Small World' exhibit, but that didn't make no sense. The ride's closed for repairs."

"When did it break down?"

"Uh, I don't know," the guard said. "The morning crew said it wasn't working and the repair crews were already there."

"Did you verify that with park maintenance?"

"Uh, no."

"Okay, let's start there," Lady Jaye said. "Crankcase, you wait in the parking lot until the rest of the guys get here, and then direct them our way. We'll keep in touch by radio."

"Wait? More of you? You can't go into the park with weapons!" the guard complained until Jaye lazily moved the M-16 barrel back in the direction of his barnacles. "People will notice you!"

"We'll tell them we're part of a new show," she said. "Let's go, Shipwreck."


"I knew it was a mistake to pair her with Flint so often," the general mumbled.

"Sir?" Lady Jaye said.

Hawk lifted his face out of his hands, pulling a report from the pile in front of him. "I'm, I'm fine. That does explain the origin of this complaint," he said, vaguely waving in her direction. "Keep going."


"So, what are we gonna do, Jaye? Break into the exhibit?" Shipwreck asked as they approached the closed ride.

"If it's being repaired, there should be workers here. Let's knock."

"Oh, yeah, and if Cobra's involved, they're going to just let us in."

She walked to the side of the exhibit, scanning the walls until she found the worker's entrance. The door was locked, though, and Shipwreck stuck his head around the corner of the building.

"Okay, I think I can force my way in through the front," he said after a moment of studying the closed entrance.

"No need."

"Huh? How did you open that?"

"Covert operations, Ship. I know how to pick locks."

"A gal after my own heart. Seriously, what do you see in Flint when "

"Getting used to the idea of Greenland?"

"I'm shutting up now."

Crouching, she entered the building and quickly moved behind a large block of machinery, her voice quiet. "Good, because you'll be requesting a transfer to Hell to get away from me if you let Cobra know we're here."

"What makes you think they are?" he whispered back.

She pointed to a stack of disassembled animatronic dolls where a handful of Tele-vipers were pulling wiring out of the innards.

"Go outside and radio the others," Lady Jaye said.

Shipwreck was getting ready to object when a loud bang and swearing caused them to duck deeper behind their cover.

"Who left the door open? Do any of you understand the concept of subtlety?" Dr. Mindbender bellowed. "Secrecy is the key to our success."

"Aw, who's gonna believe your Mickey Mouse scheme?" Torch called out. "Get it guys? Mickey Mouse, like simple, you know, 'cause we're at Disney!"

"I'm sure everyone got it, you incompetent moron!" Mindbender growled. "An imbecilic amoeba in a coma probably got it."

"You think so? Cor, that was a good one!" Torch said proudly.

"To think what Cobra Commander could have accomplished if he had capable help," Mindbender moaned.

"So, why is this place called the Magic Kingdom?" Ripper demanded angrily. "There's not a drop of grape soda to be found in the joint, and they ain't got chocolate donuts. Doesn't sound like the happiest place on earth to me."

"Bring the next test subject forward before I test the machine on you," Mindbender growled.

"Aw, you wouldn't go and do something that stupid, now would you, Doc?" Buzzer said in a dangerous tone.

He let out a long breath. "No, no I wouldn't. The test requires subjects with cerebellums."

"Oh, my uncle had that once," Ripper said. "Nasty stuff."

"Yes, I'm sure you feel that way," Mindbender said dryly before going to the Tele-vipers. "Are the adjustments ready? We don't want a repeat of the last test. I'm running out of subjects, and I'd hate to have to use the lot of you."

"We're almost ready. Give us about ten more minutes to finish wiring all the new circuits."

"Last test?" Shipwreck whispered to Jaye. "I don't like the sound of that."

"Neither do I. Let's find Heavy Metal and Bazooka."

They slipped along behind the piles of machinery quietly until they reached a pair of Vipers standing guard in front of a closet door. Shipwreck tossed a wrench over their heads. It landed with a clang, and the two Joes rushed the guards when they looked to see what had made the noise.

Shipwreck quickly took their weapons while Jaye opened the door. They found Heavy Metal sitting with his mouth hanging open, a thin line of drool running down his chin. He looked up when Jaye sat in front of him, and said, "Bibbidi-bobbidi-boo."


"Bibbidi? Bobbidi? Boo?"

"Yes, sir," Lady Jaye answered calmly. "It's from a Disney song."

"Yes, I do know that. You expect me to believe that Cobra brainwashed him into singing 'Bibbidi-bobbidi-boo'?"

"Oh, no, sir. He wasn't singing it. He was just saying it."

Hawk blinked slowly, then rubbed his hands over his face.

"To be honest, sir, I don't think that was their intention," Lady Jaye continued. "For all his complaints about the Dreadnoks, Dr. Mindbender isn't exactly the walking epitome of subtle himself. The lyrics to the songs were modified, but it was pretty crudely done. We made recordings for Breaker and Psyche-Out to analyze."

"And Bazooka was in the same condition?"

"Not exactly, sir."


"Man, I thought the brainwave scanner messed people up," Shipwreck complained as he hefted Heavy Metal over his shoulder. "He's drooling on my best shirt!"

"Shut up and get him out of here. Radio Cutter and have him send a med-evac. And find out where the rest of the guys are. We need to capture that equipment so we can undo whatever they've done to the Bazooka and Heavy Metal."

"What are you going to do?"

"I'm going to see if I can talk Bazooka down. If nothing else, I'll keep the Dreadnoks from putting him through another experiment. Hurry!"

"Right. I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Hey, Bazooka! Bazooka!" Lady Jaye called out as quietly as she could. The missile specialist continued to rock back and forth on the ceiling girder where he sat. He was humming something under his breath, but she wasn't able to make out what it was.

"How the hell did he even get up there?" she mumbled. Not seeing a way to climb up to the girders, she exited the closet and locked the unconscious Vipers into it. Sneaking around the outer wall, she found the stairway that led to the catwalk, and from there she made her way cautiously to Bazooka's side. She moved slowly, not wanting to startle him into falling.

"Bazooka? It's me, Lady Jaye? Do you remember me?"

"Uh, huh."

"Good. Do you know where you are?"

"Disneyland!"

"That's right, but it's time for us to go now. Do you understand me?"

"Don't wanna go."

"We have to leave now."

"Don't wanna go!"

"Shh, it's okay. Don't yell, Bazooka," she said, sitting down near him. Frowning, she considered her options. Whatever they had done to him, it had left him in a child-like state, and she was hardly an expert on dealing with fussy kids. But at his core, he was still a Joe, and there had to be a way she could reach him. What would motivate Bazooka?

"Would you like some cotton candy?" she asked brightly. "Or a candy apple?"

"And ice cream?"

"Sure thing, big guy. But they don't sell it in here. We'll have to go outside to one of the vendors to get it."

She smiled when he followed her, but she cringed when he began skipping along the narrow metal girder. "Bazooka, if you fall and get hurt, you can't have any treats. Be careful."

"Yes, Mommy."


"Mommy?" Hawk said, unable to contain his snicker.

"I'd greatly appreciate it if Flint never heard about this, sir."

"I can't imagine why," he said, privately enjoying the discomforted expression that she finally wore.

"If I may continue."

He held his hands up in front of his chest. "By all means."


"That's it, Bazooka. You're almost down. Guess who's coming to join us? Crankcase and Alpine and Lowlight."

"Don't like Lowlight."

She rolled her eyes, quickly looking around to make sure no more Cobras were in the area. "You don't have to play with him."

"Good."

Taking his hand, she put her finger to her lips. "There're some bad guys around. If they see us or hear us, they're going to try to stop us from getting you your ice cream."

"And cotton candy and candy apple and…"

"That's right, so let's be real quiet, okay?"

"'kay."

Pulling gently, she slowly made her way toward the door, keeping them behind the various gears and cogs in the rear of the exhibit. They'd made it most of the way when Bazooka suddenly stopped and yanked his hand free.

"We can't stop now. We're almost outside," Lady Jaye urged softly. "I'll get you soda, too. A great, big, giant one."

"Make it stop."

"Make what stop, Bazooka? Let's get out of here."

"Make it stop!" he bellowed, rushing over to the pile of disassembled dolls. Grabbing a little Dutch girl by the clogs, he began swinging it at the Tele-vipers that came running over. "Make it stop!"

"We need backup in the 'It's A Small World' exhibit. Now!" she called over her radio before kicking the legs out from under a Viper trying to sneak up behind Bazooka.

Not that she needed to worry too much. He turned the mechanical doll into an effective weapon, swinging it around with enough force that she heard a Tele-viper's ribs crack from the impact.

"More Joes are here! I told you they were on to us," Mindbender screamed. "I'm getting out of here."

"It's just the crazy dude and a chickie," Torch said. "We can handle them, can't we boys?"

"You take the guy, I'll take the girl," Ripper sneered.

"Like bloody hell you will! I saw her first!" Torch said, pushing the other Dreadnok into a pile of costumes.

"Hey, I called dibs on her. I get her!"

Jaye rolled her eyes as she decked another Tele-viper. She was trying to figure out how to get near Bazooka – who was still swinging the animatronic figure – when she smelled Buzzer's approach. Grabbing one of the hammers from the table by her side, she flung it backwards and smiled when she heard him drop to the ground.

The remaining two Dreadnoks were still fighting over her as she crawled on her hands and knees to Bazooka's side. Reaching up, she tackled and straddled him before he could clog her.

"Bazooka!" she yelled, slapping his face.

He stared at her dumbly for a moment. "Thanks, I needed that."

She started to stand up when he started humming again, and this time she recognized it was the song normally played non-stop on the ride. "It's a world of slaughter, a world of tears; it's a world of dopes, it's a world of fear…"

His eyes glazed over as he saw the robotic parts around him, and he started screaming again as he pushed her away.

"Make it stop! Make it stop!"

Ripper and Torch had stopped fighting and were approaching when she pointed at them. "It's their fault. They're doing it."

"Cor! Why'd you turn that maniac loose on us? It was Mindbender that made him listen to his version of that bloody song for ever. Let's get out of here. Cobra don't pay enough for this!"

"I'm with you, mate," Ripper said, cutting a support beam that dropped a section of lights down between them and the Joes.


"And just how did you get out of there with thousands of witnesses?"

"We told everyone it was a new show Disney was working on, but it ran into technical difficulties."

Hawk looked impressed. "Disneyland let you get away with that?"

"Sir, people don't even hear about it when someone dies on a ride at Disneyland. They have ways of clamping down on bad publicity that the KGB envies. They'll gladly cover the repair costs to avoid the public learning that a terrorist attack happened there," Lady Jaye told him earnestly.

"And what about the A.W.E. Strikers? Why did you have to leave them behind?"

"Well, that was about the time the guys showed up to help us. They heard my last radio broadcast, and they raced through the park with the A.W.E. Strikers. I sent Lowlight to take Bazooka to the med-evac location and joined the others on the chase. We caught up with the Dreadnoks while they were near a storage area where they kept the soda concentrate for the various vendor locations."

"And?"

"Between exploding canisters of soda syrup and Torch's flamethrower, well, the vehicles ended up somewhat caramelized."

"As did you," he said dryly, looking at the various degrees of gunk coating the rest of the team.

"Actually, sir, that's more from the avalanche of cotton candy."

"I didn't realize they had replaced Splash Mountain with a new ride."

Lady Jaye regarded him levelly. "The Dreadnoks buried the stalled vehicles under a stockpile of cotton candy to cover their escape. Apparently it dissolves quite readily in warm soda syrup."

"What about Heavy Metal and Bazooka?"

"It's essentially a badly-done post-hypnotic suggestion. They were forced to listen to the songs repeatedly, " Psyche-Out said, putting a tape recorder on the desk and playing the songs.

"That's subliminal?" Hawk asked, wincing at the badly rewritten lyrics.

"I'm guessing there's something in the frequency that was used that induced the hypnotic effect; Breaker's looking into that now," Psyche-Out said as he turned off the recording.

"I'm sure he's enjoying that task," he said under his breath.

"Just listening to them doesn't seem to have any effect. Except you get the song stuck in your head," the team's resident psychologist added with a pained laugh. "I think I'll need to hypnotize myself into forgetting them."

"Will they be all right?"

"Yes, Hawk. A few sessions and some bed rest, and they'll be fine. It might be a good idea not to mention anything Disney related to them for a while until we see if there are any lingering effects."

The general leaned back in his chair, staring at Lady Jaye. After a minute he dismissed the rest of her team. "So, to summarize, Sergeant, you left the Seal Beach Naval Weapons Station, which you were supposed to defend, went on a wild goose chase to Disneyland, 'coerced' a guard into letting you into the facilities, where you proceeded to nearly destroy an exhibit that's practically a national landmark, caused thousands of dollars in damage to a private establishment, and did all of this in the full view of thousands of civilians."

"I think that's accurate, sir," Lady Jaye said with a quick nod of her head.

"As of now, you're assigned to helping clean up all the vehicles that were damaged in that attack. You won't have any other assignments until all of them are in working order again."

She smiled brightly. "Thank you, sir!"

"You can start tomorrow morning. It'll probably take you that long to get the ooze out of your hair and uniform."

"I'll get right on it, General Hawk."

Psyche-Out frowned as she left, and it deepened when Hawk started to chuckle. "I think maybe Lady Jaye needs to come in for an evaluation. She was happy."

"She should be. She's been wanting to learn some repair skills."

"You're rewarding her?"

"Of course! She did what needed to be done, without fear of what the risk would do to her career. She took full responsibility for it, and she pulled it off without the public even finding out. That's the type of attitude I need in my unit leaders."

"I see," Psyche-Out said doubtfully. "If you'll excuse me, sir, I'll go check in on my patients."

"You do that. Tell them I'll be by later to visit."

"I'm sure they'll appreciate the gesture. Good night."

"Good night."

Hawk gathered up the reports from the day's events and tossed them into his in-basket, humming to himself as he did so. "It's a world of slaughter, a world of tears, da, da, da Subliminal messages in Disney rides! Cobra's scraping the bottom of the barrel if that's the best they can come up with … It's a thrall world after all, it's a thrall world, Cobra's all. Well ... at least we know it doesn't work ..."

The End



A/N II: 'obstreperous' is just another word for rambunctious.

A/N III: Thule Air Base is the US Air Force's northernmost base, less than a thousand miles from the North Pole. It was the coldest US military installation I could think of off the top of my head.