In which Ronove is under pressure…
Xox
There was no other time in his life, rather his existence, which the 27th ranked demon of hell was more pissed off. Every other time he was able to keep his cool, but every time Halloween came around the corner, $#^* like this occurred.
"Ronove-sama, are the cookies done? I'm tired of tea..."
"Yeah! I'm hungry~"
"Take your time Ronove-sama; it's not like they're going to disappear…"
"How about…" Ronove let his composure slip for a moment, then stopped. In the long run, getting back at Satan is pointless (because that's what she wants), Beelzebub was a retarded fat girl in an anorexic body, and Belphegor wanted him to rest so his masterpiece can burn!
"Okay, until they are done just go away!" /There, I said it…/ "If that is what you want…" The three left sadly; their only weakness is rejection.
"Finally!"CRASH!
"What %^k?~"
Ronove ran out of the double doors to see… a hot $$ mess!
"Oi! It Robnof, meh besh pal! In't it Gaaaap?" Beatrice: stone drunk: $0.00
"Dahhh, he luk so cuute tonite! Go bring me another bottle of Iri-h Bailey's… you bitch." Gaap: equally drunk, $0.00.
"Don't call him that!" Battler taking up for Ronove: worthless.
The two witches were paying no attention to chastising voice. Neither were they listening to their own. "Duh hunhur ha! Gaap, I geh it now, it's-it's like da word 'gap' with another 'a'! Woww!"
"It's okay Battler-sama; this happens every year especially before Milady loss her power." Ronove gave a small frown. Gaap and Beatrice were still throwing empty brandy bottles at the ground demanding more.
"Well it's not gonna happen while I'm here!" Battler said adamantly. Alrighty then… "Hey, aren't you too young to drink?"
"Heke?"
"You eighteen. I'm not going to demon counseling again; I'll go over the limit of evil doing…" Ronove pit it simply. Battler scratched his empty head. "There's a limit?" he asked. "Oh God, now that's my limit, I'm going to finish up for tomorrow…"
"Wait!" Battler had a rough grip on Ronove's arm. "Don't leave me, with them. They've been sexually harassing me all night. You don't wanna know what's behind Gaap's dress; things are not as they seem…" Battler seriously looked afraid. Ronove knew for a fact he had a damn reason to be, for they were in fact rapists.
"Yeah, come on inside I guess."
"Thank you!" *snuggle*snuggle*snuggle*snug-
"Stop hugging me, it's weird…"
"Otay… :3"
"Now you sit in the chair at the table and-"
"I help make COOKIES!?!"
"Now as I was sayin' until your $$ jumped in, you sit, I bakey okay? Comprende?"
"Hmmm, I don't know that last word. It was… Jamaican wasn't it?!"
/This poor child is in the second trimester…/. Later on, he will turn into a drunk, retarded baby-like state, if he is unfortunate. *Ding!* A little timer went off near the oven, and the chef neatly pulled the cookie pan out of the rack. They were basically sugar cookies designed like the stereotypical rotted human, a dying angel with its head being ripped off by a demon, and even unicorns!
"Since you are less drunk (and a smaller probability of vomiting on me), you have the first choice Battler." "Yay! I want a unicorn!" He proceeded to gingerly pluck a My Little Pony pink colored one. He began licking the head in detail: and by detail, I mean awkwardly; by awkwardly, I mean obscenely; and by obscenely I mean seductively; and by this time, Ronove was getting hot, and by hot I mean-
"Batt, just eats the goddamn cookie, and let it be! Pinkie Pie {that's her name} did not ask for you to R. Kelly her, Christ!" The teen looked at him with a knowing grin, the valorous way he does when he desires to use his blue truth. "It tastes perfect." /What is he up to? /. "Can I tell you a secret, Ronove?"
"That's unwise; I am a demon."
"You remember when I first met you?"
"Oh yeah, I was so cool…" Ronove began to side track on his awesome appearance.
"Iblushedbecauseilike—you! There! No guy has ever liked me before, so I'm nervous."
{Still not paying attention} "And then I was all transparent, and I had Kinzo's ring in my hand and- What the hell did you say?!" Battler stared at the spotless white floor. "Are you telling me, I have a fan boy? And who said I liked you?!" Ronove did a selfish about face and returned to the stove {like he was busy}. "I knew you'd say that, so I hacked into your computer…"
"You say WHAT!!!"
"Awww, it was nothing, I just say a few fan shots of myself… Don't deny me please!" He hurried over for a cuddle. "I won't tell a soul." The boy said with open arms. /What's come over me? What is this feeling in my heart?!/
And what happened then? Well, on Rokkenjima they say that the demon's small heart grew three sizes that day. And then - the true meaning of Halloween came through, and the demon found the strength of *twenty-five* demons, plus two!
"Oh Battler, it's the truth, but I cannot love you; it is forbidden."
"How comes boyfriend?'
"First off, wait don't call me that, secondly, don't you know the curse of Sexy Fan service?"
"No."
"Well you should! Because every time a force breaks apart a popular 'sexy' fan-based relationship, the one which interrupts them… dies!" *Dramatic Music!* "And your partner by consensus, is BattlerxBeatrice!"
{Not paying attention} "Yeah…So when does the make-out scene start?"
"Gah! You're hopeless!" The only way was to convince the two elder witches tomorrow, but Battler was nearing his third trimester, and would prove useless.
Here goes, you enigmatic cliff hanger questions:
Will the two elder witches approve of these two? Wow, obvious.
What is the hell are Gaap and Beatrice doing in the parlor? You don't wanna know.
Will there be a make-out scene?! Battler: That's what I wanna know!…
Why the hell did Ronove make My Little Pony cookies?Ronove: Hey!
