A/N: Just a little one shot that I had rattling around.
I was five the first time I saw him. He was fifteen and not fully grown yet, but still very impressive, especially to a child as small as I was. I was the youngest of eight children and the only girl. I was brought to my father's throne room and presented as if I were some kind of exotic animal. I of course was too young to realize any of this at the time and my future husband was, in thinking back, not amused by the whole proceeding. Though he was not pleased with my father's fawning and showing me off like a prize horse, he was polite and kind to me.
I was brought to stand before him and the first thing he did was ask for a low stool to sit on so that we might look each other in the eye. He kissed my hand and greeted me as if I were much older. Despite my tender years he spoke to me as if I was a young woman grown. He ask me if I enjoyed riding. I glanced at my feet and told him I wasn't allowed to ride. Glancing up at him through my eyelashes I saw he looked annoyed at my answer, but only briefly. It bothered me, even though I didn't know him, that I seemed to have disappointed him. I knew that I was supposed to make a good impression on this young man. He was the crown prince of Troy. And father wanted the alliance with Troy very badly. If I made a mistake and caused the alliance to fail, I would be severely punished. It didn't matter that I was a mere child. Smiling at me the prince said that would have to change since the symbol of his people was a horse and the future queen of those people must learn to ride as though she had been born in the saddle. I heard my mother start to protest only to be curtly told to hold her tongue by my father. The prince then told me that he had brought a young mare that he trained himself especially for me and with my parents' permission he requested that he be allowed to give me my first riding lesson. My father indicated that he had their blessing to begin my training on horseback. Secretly I think my father always wanted to teach me to ride, but mother was so adamantly against it that he didn't fight her. Standing he took my hand and lead me outside where a beautiful brown mare was waiting at the bottom of the steps. "Her name is Omorfi. May I assist you, my lady?" Nodding my agreement, he reached down and picked me up. My mother, who was already scandalized at the idea of a daughter riding as well as a son, was further scandalized by my future husband putting me on the horse not sidesaddle, but astride and then getting on behind me and pulling me in close to keep me from falling off.
He spent two months with us. Those were a glorious two months. That time is the last that I remember being happy as a child. And then he was gone. I would not see him again until the year I lost my entire family. I was eighteen years old that summer. Our kingdom was sacked by Achilles and his men and before the reinforcements from our allies could reach us, my father and brothers all lay dead. My mother did not long survive them. I was attending her during her final days when he returned.
I was an awkward young girl at that point in my life. I was schooled in what would be expected of me as the wife of the future king of Troy, but had very little opportunity to practice what my tutors drilled into my head. I had been kept away from other young people at social gatherings and was unsure of myself around strangers. When he appeared in the door way of my mother's room I was kneeling at her bedside holding her hand as she struggled to cling to life. I don't know how long he was at the door watching me before I noticed him.
"What has happened?"
I was so stunned at his appearance and grief stricken that I couldn't manage to answer him. Before I knew what was happening he was beside me. I attempted to rise gracefully from my kneeling position to greet him, but my legs were numb from kneeling so long, and I became entangled in my long gown. I practically collapsed in a heap at his feet. He caught me as I crumbled. I could feel my face becoming warm with the embarrassment of having collapsed. I tried to pull away once he steadied me, but he held onto me gently.
"It's alright my little one. I won't hurt you. You do remember me."
Finally finding my voice I stepped back from him, "Of course I remember you. I may have been young when you last graced us with your presence, but I was not lacking in wits then or now. And don't call me little one. I'm the heir to my father's throne now that he and my brothers are all dead."
The only response I received was a raised eyebrow. I spoke more sharply than I intended, but I was annoyed at his question. As if I would be unable to remember the man I was promised to. The man I had dreamed about since I was little. I turned back to my mother and started to kneel again when I felt myself lifted off the ground. "Put me down you brute. You have no right. . . "
"Hush. I have every right. By custom and law though we have not consummated, nor will we for some time, our marriage, you are my wife and I can do as I see fit with you. Especially considering you have no one else to care for you."
My face flamed again. I was thankful that when he lifted me off my feet to carry me out that I was facing away from him. Setting me on the ground in the hallway and turning me to face him, he continued, "Now then my darling, when was the last time you ate anything or slept?"
I stared at him dumbfounded. Rather than respond to his query I retorted, "Why do you insist on not using my name when speaking to me?"
Looking back, I don't know why I was fighting him so hard. All he wanted to do was help me, but I was annoyed and didn't care if he knew it.
"Andromache, when did you last eat or sleep."
When he said my name all the anger, despair, and grief I had held in for so long spilled out and I fell apart. I wept. Confusion and concern crossed his face. I cried because no one dared say my name in weeks. For weeks I held myself together and pretended to be strong. All it took was one simple thing for me to break, hearing my name on his lips. "Andromache, what is it?" I shook my head unable to stem my weeping. Unsure what to do he simply opened his arms to me. With some hesitation I stepped into his embrace. He enveloped me. I lay my head on his broad chest as he stroked my hair and spoke soothingly to me. As my sobs subsided I tried to step back as I dashed my hands against my eyes, but was prevented from doing so by his strong encircling arms.
"I'm sorry. My behavior is less than becoming. It. . . it won't happen again."
"Sweet Andromache, your behavior is above reproach. You have lost almost all of your family in the last few weeks. Sadness is to be expected. I would have been more concerned about your behavior if you showed no feelings at all." Reaching down he lifted me into his arms saying. "Rest love, I'm here now and will take care of you."
Turning he spoke to the others who were gathered in the hallway watching us. "Bring food and drink to my lady's chamber. She will be resting for the rest of the evening."
"My lord, you can't be in the princess's room alone. . . ."
It was my father's chamberlain who spoke. The look that was turned on him would have quelled smarter men, but not Dreyfuss; he was and still is a fool.
"It's not proper. I cannot allow you . . ."
"You cannot allow me. I'm not seeking your permission. My lady needs rest and comfort. I plan to make sure she has both. We are by law married. I will not discuss this further. Now where is her room?"
Carrying me away he followed one of my hand maiden's through the corridors to my rooms. She attempted to remain after leading him in, but was quickly dismissed. "Please ensure that food and drink are brought here as well as my things. I will be staying with my lady." My hand maiden had the good sense not to argue. "Yes m'lord."
He waited until she pulled the doors to my room closed before moving towards my couch. Weakly I smiled as he gently laid me down. Curling up on my side I watched him as he walked slowly around my room touching my things. Many of the gifts he sent over the last decade were prominently displayed. The many pieces of jewelry were laid out on my dressing table. Glancing back at me he smiled. It seemed to please him that I enjoyed the things he sent me. "You received my gifts" It was a statement not a question.
Nodding I smiled as he ran his hand across the small sea shell and pearl necklace. "That one is my favorite." Picking it up he fingered it before bringing it across the room. Sitting on the edge of my couch and reaching around my neck he carefully put the necklace on me and then traced his fingers slowly across the necklace as it lay on my neck. The focal point of the necklace was a rather long piece of mother of pearl that lay just above my breasts. He drew his finger down that piece saying "It was my favorite piece as well. I hoped you would like it. I am pleased that you enjoy wearing it. It certainly suits you." My face felt hot and I glanced away from his dark penetrating eyes. I wasn't sure what he was doing or what exactly I was feeling. I had never been touched by a man in such a way. All of my interactions with men had been limited for the most part to my father and brothers.
"Andromache, look at me please."
I shook my head and refused to turn my face to his. Gently he cupped my face and turned it until I faced him. "It's alright Andromache. Your life has been turned upside down. You're frightened and you don't know me, but I promise you that I will be by your side through everything that is to come. I am sorry that I was unable to reach you sooner. You can trust me and you can trust my men." Knocking at the door caused him to stand and move across the room to the door. "Whose there?"
"Tecton, my prince. I have brought your things as you requested. And there is food and drink here for you and the princess."
Opening the doors to my chamber he motioned for the man outside to enter followed by two kitchen maids carrying trays of food and drink. I moved to sit up to properly greet the new comer. As I began to rise Tecton went to one knee before me and in my confusion I remained sitting. "My lady, my sword and my life are at your command." I glanced up at the prince and he nodded. "I accept both and promise that you will always have a place at my table. I swear that I will not ill use your life or your sword in my service." Looking behind Tecton I saw that I had done well. The smile that greeted me was as brilliant as the sun. I felt myself blushing again.
"My lady and I thank you Tecton for your loyalty and service. I would ask that you arrange a rotation of guards outside my lady's door. No one is to enter unless I give permission."
"As you wish my prince. My lady." Bowing Tecton escorted the maids out and left the room closing the doors behind him. As the doors closed he turned back to me smiling. "That was very well done my love." Moving back to my side he took a seat beside me and brushed his fingers lightly over my cheek. "You should rest Andromache."
"But I'm not tired." As soon as the words were out of my mouth I yawned. Smiling I glanced away. "I believe you might not be quite telling the truth my lady. Please try to rest." Nodding I lay back down as he moved to the things Tecton brought in. He began removing the armour he was wearing. I watched completely mesmerized until he realized I was watching him. Turning my head, I flushed all over. "You are welcome to continue watching me Andromache. You will after all become intimately acquainted with my body at some point in the not so distant future and I see no reason why you shouldn't have the opportunity to view it in advance of our joining together."
"I. . . I. . . I really shouldn't. I'm sorry. It was very unladylike of me to stare at you in such a manner."
I heard him chuckling which caused me to flush even worse. I was torn between embarrassment at having been caught staring at him as he undressed and anger that he was laughing at my discomfort. I hadn't realized he had moved back across the room to my side until he sat down and took ahold of shoulders and turned me to him. I kept my eyes averted as he turned me. "Andromache."
"Please. Don't. Are you planning on staying with me all night?" My voice was harsh even to my ears, but he was undeterred. Putting a finger under my chin he forced me to look up at him. I couldn't help but notice that his tunic had been removed after I turned my head away. My discomfort was apparent. "Yes, Andromache, I plan to remain with you all evening. Now what is it that angers you?"
"You laughed at my embarrassment."
"I apologize if that is how it seemed, but that is not what I intended. Your sweetness and innocence amused me. You never saw your brothers without their tunics before?"
Shaking my head, I tried to pull out of his arms, but he refused to release me. "Please let me go."
"Why?"
"I wish to sleep now."
"I think it has more to do with you being in close contact with a half-naked man. Ah, I see from the red stain that graces your lovely cheeks that I am correct. My darling there is no reason to be embarrassed or frightened." Releasing my shoulders, he reached down and wrapped an arm around my waist pulling me closer. He tipped my head back. I shivered whether in fear or anticipation of what he would do I don't know, but before I could speak he bent his head and kissed me. He kissed me in a way I never expected. My parents kissed in front of us, but it was always a short chaste kiss on the lips or cheek. I was completely unaware that one could be kissed in this manner. It terrified me, but at the same time thrilled me. I felt his arm tighten around my waist and smelled the earthiness of his body as he held me. Moving he pressed me back against my pillows as he continued kissing me. I could feel the heat from his body through my own thin gown. I suddenly felt trapped and scared. Pushing at his chest I tried desperately to push him off me. With his free hand he grasped my flailing hands and pinned them above my head easily. He trailed light kisses across my cheeks and my throat. He murmured my name against my throat as I writhed beneath him trying in vain to regain my freedom. "Andromache, don't fight me. I won't hurt you I swear." He brought his free hand out from behind my back and was lightly stroking my face.
Stuttering I finally spoke, "I. . .I. . .I thought we weren't going to . . ." I couldn't finish my sentence. I was embarrassed and frustrated.
"Sweet Andromache I have no intention of consummating our marriage in such a manner. When the time comes you will be ready and very willing to fulfill your vows to me. Not to mention we must have our marriage formally blessed in the Temple of Apollo in Troy before we could join together in such a way. But, there are ways of enjoying one another's bodies without the ultimate fulfillment of our relationship." In illustration of his point he lightly brushed his hand across my breasts. My response was immediate. My eyes closed in shock and pleasure and I lost the ability to breath for a split second. When I opened my eyes he was smiling down at me.
"Do you trust me Andromache?" Blinking at him I slowly nodded. "Then allow me to show you a taste of the pleasures my body can bring yours." I looked away from him because I was mortified at my own lack of control and because I was wholly unprepared for his attentions. "But I. . . I. . ." I flushed and was unable to speak.
"My darling I don't mean to begin your lessons tonight." Brushing his fingers lightly over my breasts again he said, "Unless, it is your desire that I do so."
Speechless I gazed at him as he watched me. I felt his hand settle and began gently kneading my breast. His thumb rubbed lightly against the nipple, causing me to gasp, but didn't try to move away. My treacherous body arched against his as he continued. Taking one of my hands he placed it on his chest. "It's alright if you touch me as well. We have until your mother recovers or, well, we have our time here, virtually alone, to get to know one another better. We should use our time wisely."
Tentatively I let my fingers trace the muscles of his chest before allowing both of my hands to wonder to his shoulders and eventually worked my way to his hair. It was long, but plaited at the nape. I touched the curls that framed his face, brushing them away as I explored. He smiled at me as I became acquainted with his body. He continued his menstruations as I grew bolder in mine. All the while he watched my face as I took in every aspect of his torso. As I ran my hands across his chest again I felt him pull lightly on the nipple of the breast he had been playing with. I gasped in shock and ceased my movements. "Andromache? Did I hurt you?"
Shaking my head, I took a deep breath and smiled shyly at him. Smiling in return he ceased touching me and leaned down and slowly kissed me again. I clung to him as he kissed my lips and moved down my neck and across the bare skin above my neckline. He murmured against my skin, "Are you enjoying yourself my darling?" My hands were tangled in his hair and my breathing was uneven. I nodded, but I was unable to give him a verbal response.
Speaking again he murmured, "You chastised me earlier for not calling you by your name, but you, Andromache, have yet to say my name." He was looking up at me from between breasts with one eyebrow raised. I just watched him. Sitting up slightly he ran his hands up my arms and pinned them to the couch. I was again completely trapped as his body pinned mine. Leaning in close he whispered in my ear, "Do you wish to continue with your lesson?" He nibbled on my ear as he waited for my response. Moving against him I turned my head enough to bring my lips to meet his. He took my initiating the kiss as my answer and whispered huskily in my ear. "Then, before the night is out I will have you crying my name as I teach you pleasures that you never knew existed before. But, my sweet girl, if at any point you are uncomfortable with what we are doing you must say so. I do not want to harm you in anyway. I want ours to be a happy marriage."
Nodding my agreement, I lay back and waited. Moving back between my breasts he smiled before pulling the cloth of my gown that covered them taut and kissing each one in turn. I gasped. Smiling at my reaction he released my hands allowing me to touch him again. What I remember most about that night was how warm his hands and mouth were on my body. Both caused sensations in me that I never felt before. We continued in such a manner for some time before he said, "I'm going to remove the broaches that hold you gown at the shoulders. Then, my little darling, if you have enjoyed the touch of my hands and the brief kisses I have given your beautiful breasts you are going to truly enjoy my next lesson for you." My languid enjoyment of our interactions disappeared in a flash as he reached for my broaches. I panicked and struggled against him.
"Please don't. Please. I'm begging you." I wasn't ready to be bear before him.
"Andromache, look at me." Shaking I refused to meet his eyes. "If it is your desire that we stop we will. As I said before scaring you or harming you is not what I intend. Do you want to stop? Please look at me." Turning back to face him I could see the concern in his eyes. Reaching out he brushed the tears away saying, "I'm going to finish changing out of my travel stained clothes. You may watch if you wish. After I have changed I will come join you again and if it is your desire we will sleep, nothing more." Nodding I stared at the ceiling as he stood. Reaching out my hand I caught his and sat up.
"Please wait. I'm, I'm sorry. I panicked. Everything has been so confused lately. My whole world has fallen apart and then after nearly fifteen years you reappear out of the blue and quite literally sweep me off my feet. It was just too much all at once. I've never even been left alone in the company of a man much less been touched in such a way by one. My mother never told me about the intimate parts of a relationship between a man and a woman."
Turning back to me he sat down beside me and took my face in his hands. "No Andromache, it is I who should be apologizing to you. I promised to give you comfort and rest and I have not done that very well. I should not have initiated the physical aspect of our relationship tonight. You weren't ready for that and I should have known that. I've dreamed so long of the day I could return and claim you as my wife. You were beautiful even as a child and when I entered your mother's room I was stunned at how much more beautiful you were than I imagined you would be." Brushing the still flowing tears away with his thumbs he continued, "I'm sorry I pushed you. You looked so beautiful and curious watching me I couldn't help myself. I'm not trying to make excuses for my behavior, I just want you to know I did what I did because I find you incredibly desirable. And were it not for the necessity of the blessings in the temple I would be asking you before the week was out to allow me to make you completely and wholly my wife."
Self-conscious again I stood and moved away from him to the balcony overlooking the gardens. Following me he wrapped his arms around my waist pulled me against his chest. I said nothing for a time letting all he said soak in. I could smell the gardenia's below and to this day anytime I catch a whiff of that scent it takes be back to that night. Finally, I turned in his arms and laid my head against his bare chest and wrapping my arms around him said, "I will accept your apology on one condition." Looking down at me he raised an eyebrow in question. "You must promise me that you will continue my lessons." I looked away in embarrassment at how bold I was being.
"Are you sure?" When I nodded he lifted me off the ground and kissed me. "You enjoyed our intimate touches then?"
My voice was so low when I responded I think he almost couldn't hear me. "Very much. I'm just sorry that my inexperience and ignorance of such matters caused me to panic."
"Your innocence and sweetness only heightens my desire. Come let me ready myself for bed and I will join you shortly." Carrying me back inside he set me down next to my couch and moved to change his clothes. "May I assist in any way?" Glancing back at me he smiled.
"Come with me darling." I followed him to my wash basin. I looked up at him quizzically. "The one thing I need help with and that can be rather intimate and sensual is washing one another. Tonight, I ask you if you are willing to bath my upper body for me so that I can rid myself of the dust of my travels. If you would rather not its ok." He brushed my hair back away from my face behind my shoulders as he watched me and waited for my answer.
Reaching out I brushed his chest with my fingertips. "If my prince wishes to be bathed he should find a stool to sit on as I am not as great in stature as he is." Smiling he turned and found my dressing stool and moving it closer to my wash basin, he sat.
Picking up the cloth left for me I dipped it in the cool water before tentatively reaching out and dragging the damp cloth across his body. I repeated the process until I washed his entire upper body. He watched me as I stepped around him washing the dust, dirt and sweat from his body. As I finished I wrung the cloth out one last time and reached up to wash his face. As I did so he struck like a snake grabbing my hands he pulled me hard against his chest. "Do you know how wild your gentle touches are making me?" Looking down at him I reddened, but feeling slightly bolder I said, "Show me. I want to know." Brushing my hair back again he took ahold of my face in his large warm hands he kissed me. Tugging slightly he brought me to sit on his lap. "I think my darling that you have had enough lessons for one night." Kissing me he continued, "You need sleep and rather than risk scaring you again by allowing my desire for you to run rampant I think we should end your lessons for the night. I will leave you for few minutes so that you may prepare for bed in private."
Standing me on my feet he walked to the door and went into the hallway leaving me on my own for the first time since his arrival. I collapsed on the stool he recently occupied. Prepare myself for bed? I slept with nothing on most nights because of the warmth. Standing I walked to the door and pulled it open. "I need one of my hand maiden's please to assist me." His back was to me when I opened the door, but he turned when I spoke.
"No need I can attend you."
I'm certain my face showed shock at his suggestion, but I had no excuse as to why he shouldn't assist me. I caught the knowing look that passed between the men guarding my door and flushed, embarrassed that they assumed they knew what was occurring behind the closed doors of my room. Stuttering I again requested my hand maiden only to be told it was not an inconvenience for him to assist me. I turned and fled back into my room leaving the door open in my haste.
"The princess is a sweet innocent little thing isn't she," a male voice I did not recognize said. His tone made it clear even to an innocent such as myself what he meant.
"While that may be true. You will do well to remember that the princess is your future queen and my wife, do not forget that. I will tolerate no ribald jokes at her expense. Do I make myself clear?" I smiled at the tone of voice the prince used in chastising the other speaker.
"Yes, your highness, perfectly clear. My apologies."
"It is to the princess, who I'm quite certain not only heard you, but saw the looks you gave one another, you owe the apology." I was certain the prince had spoken loud enough that I could hear so that I had time to compose myself before being confronted with the miscreant.
I took a seat at my dressing table and began combing my hair as a way to mask my nerves. I heard a rapping on the door before a voice spoke, "My lady." Turning on my seat I saw the younger of the two guards standing in my door way. Standing as gracefully as I could considering my nerves I replied, "Yes?" When he hesitated I continued, "You may enter."
Going to one knee before me he said, "My lady, my words and actions were thoughtless. I most humbly beg your pardon for my foolishness."
"I accept your apologies. We all make mistakes, but must learn from them don't you agree?"
"I do my lady. I will my lady. Thank you." Standing he backed out of the room as quickly as he could. The guard nearly collided with the prince as he stood watching the scene from the doorway. I turned back to combing my hair to hide my smile at the guard's obvious relief and not being chastised more harshly. I heard the door shut and the bar drop across securing it for the night. I was so tense that I jump and yelped when he lightly touched my shoulders. "I didn't mean to scare you." I was trembling as he held me by the shoulders. I laid my comb aside with shaking hands. "Is there something wrong darling?"
"No I was just lost in thought."
"What was it you needed assistance from your handmaiden for?"
Picking up my comb I attacked my hair with such fervor that he took it from my hands and turned me on my stool to face him. "You are shaking with fear. Please tell me what bothers you?"
"Oh why couldn't you just send for my hand maiden." I stood and moved past him, trying to put as much distance between us as I could. As he started towards me I held my hands up saying, "Please this is hard enough to say with you over there much less with you standing over me. And I swear by all the gods if you laugh at me I will, I will, make you sleep in the hallway with your men."
A smile tugged at his lips as he watched me. With his best serious face, he said, "I will stay where I am, my lady. And I promise not to laugh, too much."
"No laughing at all."
"Oh for all that is holy what is the problem woman!"
Shocked by his tone and what he said I blurted out, "I sleep naked!" To his credit he did not laugh, but I certainly startled him. Covering my mouth with my hand I'm sure my face mirrored the shock on his face. "I've never had need of night clothes before, but I can't very well sleep naked with you in my bed with me."
"What did you think your hand maiden could do for you pray tell?"
"I thought, well I hoped, she might have a better idea than just telling you I sleep naked. Maybe she would have a tunic of some kind I could borrow."
"If that is all you require I can actually help with that." Turning he rooted through the saddle bag that held his things. Finding what he was looking for he turned triumphantly to me and handed me a wade of cloth. Shaking it out I realized it was a very soft sleeveless tunic. "It's a bit wrinkled and probably will look more like a dress on you given the height difference, but will that suffice?"
"Yes I think it will. Thank you. I'll just step behind the screen and change." Picking up one of the candles that lit the room I moved behind the privacy screen and undid the broaches and belt holding my gown on. The material cascaded to the floor and pooled around my feet. I carefully stepped out of the pool of fabric and raised my arms above my head to allow the soft fabric of the tunic slide down over my body. Picking up my discarded dress I tossed it over the screen knowing my hand maiden would take care of it the next day. Coming out from behind the screen I saw him laying on my couch watching the screen.
"I hope you know you make a lovely shadow on the screen Andromache and I do hope you will allow me to see you in such a manner again tomorrow night."
I dropped the broaches and belt I was carrying in shock not only at what he said, but also because of what he was no longer wearing. I whirled around facing away from him. "Is there something wrong Andromache?"
"You should have told me I was casting a shadow."
"Why? Then you would have blown the candle out and ruined my enjoyment of your figure."
"Because it would have been polite." Deciding I would not win this argument I changed the subject, "Why are you wearing no clothes?" I remained motionless facing away from the bed praying he wouldn't do exactly what I knew he would do. I felt his warm moist breath on my ear a moment before he whispered, "You never asked how I prefer to sleep. I too am use to sleeping naked. His arms snaked around my waist drew me back against his body. "You must get used to seeing me in this state my darling, because when we are alone, I don't plan to wear much clothing." Releasing me I heard his footsteps as he retreated to my couch. I couldn't move. "Are you coming or do you plan to sleep standing there in the middle of the floor."
Finally turning back to him I saw that he was again reclining on my couch, but with the furs pulled up to his waist. "Is that better darling?" The teasing tone in his voice and the smug satisfied smile on his face irritated me for some reason. I picked up my broaches and lobbed them at his head, "You are an ass." I screamed. I completely missed and before I could find anything else to throw at him he was off the couch and had me pinned to the wall with my hands above my head. "Let me go! I want you to leave. Release me this instant." Holding me pinned to the wall he covered my mouth with his to quiet my voice. This did nothing but infuriate me further. I struggled in vain against his retraining hands and body. After what seemed like an eternity he stopped kissing me. I was so worn out I felt limp. Turning my head from him I cried.
"Andromache, stop fighting me. If you really want me to leave I will, but is that really what you want?"
"I don't know. I'm just so tired of being treated like a child." Moving back, he released my arms and picked me up. I didn't have the strength to fight him anymore and allowed myself to be carried to my couch. Laying me down he proceed to lay down behind me and pull the furs up over us. He attempted to pull me into his arms, but I moved away and kicked at him saying, "Please don't touch me. Just let me sleep."
"Andromache, talk to me. Tell me what it is that bothers you so."
"You."
"I bother you? What have I done?"
Without turning towards him I spoke, "What haven't you done? For fifteen years you stayed away. Oh I'll grant you that you sent plenty of tokens of your affection. But not once after the visit when I was five have you come back before now. You never even wrote to me. You left me alone for all of those years. Years that I need someone to advocate for me. Years that we should have been getting to know one another. Years that I lived in isolation because of my status as your future wife and queen. My childhood was miserable because of you."
"What do you mean Andromache?" His tone of voice was soft and full of concern. I always assumed that the way I was raised and kept apart from others was his doing and I said as much. "Because of you and the instructions you left, I was kept apart from the court."
"My instructions? What do you mean kept apart?" His voice was even, but I heard the strain in it as if he was keeping back his anger. "I mean exactly what I said. I was kept away from the court. Oh I was trotted out for special occasions for the court to view their prize horse, the future queen of Troy. My father's crowning achievement in his quest for powerful allies was selling me off to you as your bride. But as a prize I was kept locked away lest the prize be sullied and so the four walls of this room were my prison."
"What about your lessons? Were there no noble children included with you in your lessons?"
"No, I was alone in my lessons. I learned my lessons well though. I can speak three languages, read, write, play music and all other gentile things a royal girl is taught. I was taught to dance and sing and be pleasing in every aspect. Though I don't know how pleasing I'll be when I am uncomfortable around strangers and unable to make small talk as I was not allowed to speak to anyone at the court functions I was shown off at. During the parties in the summer I could hear and see the people in the gardens below enjoying themselves. Yet I was not allowed the pleasure of joining in. Since the day you left thirteen years ago, I have been alone."
He was silent for so long that I drifted off to sleep. I woke to the touch of his hand on my hip as he leaned over me speaking, "Andromache, I am sorry. I was unaware of all of this. I certainly did not want you kept from the enjoyments of life at court and of a normal upbringing. I never gave instructions that you should be isolated in such a way. Had I known I would have taken steps to stop it."
I attempted to shake his hand off my hip as I spoke, "Please don't touch me. You ask what bothered me and I'm told you why I said you were what bothered me. Being alone all these years with very little contact outside of my parents, occasionally my brothers, my hand maid, and my tutor has not prepared me for everything that has happened the last several weeks. Then you reappear and order not only the servants around, but me as well and then you kiss and touch me and I. . . I don't know how to behave or react to such things. Please I just want to be left alone. I'm good at being alone."
"Andromache, you aren't alone. I'm here and while I can't change the past and I promise to always be at your side going forward." He disregarded my request to leave me alone and forced me onto my back. Leaning on one elbow he leaned over me brushing the tears away with his fingers. I fought the rising panic in my chest as he shifted until his body was covering mine and he rucked his tunic up that I was wearing. His hand was between my thighs tracing circles on my bare flesh.
"Please, I'm begging you, don't. I just want to be left alone to sleep." My voice was small and distant as I begged him not to touch me.
"Shhh, don't cry Andromache. Please let me do this for you. I have no other way of trying to make things better than by giving you physical pleasure. Do you trust me?" Scared as I was I nodded as he gazed down at me. "You will enjoy this darling." He leaned in and kissed me hard enough to bruise my lips. The last thing I remembered before I eventually drifted off to sleep was crying his name.
"Hector."
