I slapped the alarm clock off the desk, making its consitant ringing fall silent. Turning away from it, I looked up at the cieling, putting my arms behind me head. I though about how it would feel to have someone sleeping next to me. Their arms around me, their warm breath hitting my chest as I held them closer, embrasing them, never letting them go. Ive always wanted to hold someone and make them mine.
I quickly broke out of my day dream and blinked, clearing my vision. I slowly got out of bed and stretched my ribs and back, reaching my arms out above me. I glanced at the clock on the ground.
8:35AM
I took a quick shower, brushed my teeth, and slipped on torn black skinney jeans and a Sum 41 shirt. I looked over myself in the mirror as I put my red spiked belt through each loop lazily, and buckled it tightly, I glanced at my shaggy, sandy colored blonde hair, messily tussled everywear. Just the way I liked it. I carelessly slid into my black FALLEN skate shoes, and walked down the hardwood stares. I grabbed a piece of toast and smothered it in soft butter, putting in my mouth as I grabbed my black backpack and slipped it on. I listened to the buttons on my backpack jingle as I walked to the front door. I reached out to the handle and paused, taking a deep breathe.
"Its a new day" I thought. I exhaled and opened the door, stepping out into the depths of the tiny state of New Jersey.
A new day ~
I walked at a fair pace towards the bus stop, thinking over all my inner thoughts, a conversation between my conciounse and myself developing.
What if I never find love..?
No, dont think like that! You will, anyone who doesnt want you must be out of there mind!
How would they be out of their mind, Im nothing extrodinary or anything special.
There you go, talking negativly about yourself again!
Why do you care, your just some voice in my head, I dont even no why your discussing this with me, your input doesnt matter!
Hello, genious. I AM you.
No your not your just an annoying voice, go away!
Im hurt Damion, Im hurt. Fine! Goodbye.
No! Wait! Come back!
Suddenly I was snapped out of my thoughts by a not so familiar voice calling for me.
"Yo! Damion!"
I turned my head towards my addresser, a football player by the looks of it. Taller then average, stocky, and wearing an Anthem Highschool football Jersey.
"Sup?" I replied blankly.
"Hey man, there've been rumors goin' around that..." he paused and looked around suspiciouly before returning his attention back to his statement,
"That you tried to kill yourself." He whispered
As much as I seem like the type that would attempt suicide, I really dont find it helpful at all. All it does is cause more problems, maybe not for you, but for your family, any friends you either acknowledged or disacknowledged during your times of depression before attempting suicide, and it could give other depressed kids ideas about what their next move should be. So in the end, just dont use a permanent solution for a temporary problem.
"Psh, please. I wouldnt kill myself. Thats just a stupid idea. Who started it?" I said shaking my head.
"I dont know man, but its going around fast, good thing your back though!" The jock said, harshly slapping my shoulder.
I cringed.
"Heavy hand you got there."
He held his hands up in front of him.
"My bad!" His smile seemed even whiter, having his mouth be surounded by milk-chocolate colored skin.
An engine rawrd as the vehical came down the street, the breaks squeaking as it haulted to a stop at the end of the road by the Stop sign.
I looked up to see it was the bus. I adjusted my backpack strap around my shoulder and began walking towards it. I noticed the guy I had been talking to earlier was already in line wating to bored the yellow machine.
As I walked, I took out my MP3 player and stuck my headphones in my ears, making sure they wouldnt fall out as I walked. Scrolling through my music, I found my favorite song, Poetic Tragedy by The Used. Turning the volume on full blast to drown out the noise of screaming children on the bus and sticking it back in my pocket, I walked up the steps to the bus and took my seat in the very back, plopping my backpack next to me so noone could sit there, and I stared out the window, thinking.
I looked out into the sky, dark grey cloud forming and gently flowing over to the sun, hiding it away. A gentle breeze could be seen blowing through the trees and greenery the bus passed on its way to Anthem, and I could smell rain coming. I love the rain, I think its the most peaceful expression nature gives to us. The smell of it, Ive always found it calming, and the sound of it dripping from the sky and splattering onto the asphault of the streets is something I can easily fall asleep to. I've always loved rain, since I was little...
My mind drew back to the rumor that was addressed to me.
People have been sayin' that you tried to kill yourself.
I guess peoples imaginations and ideas will stir, its highschool. Especially considering the amount of absences Ive surcome to over the passed month or so, and being how I kind of made myself famous on the first day of year 9 by accidenlty tackling a teacher. Calm down! It was a total accident, I was riding my skateboard and I did a kickflip of the railing to the stairs leading up to the school and the teacher just happened to be there, infront of me, when gravity decide to take charge and make me its bitch...Oh, did I mention it was a female teacher? Yeah, its not really okay when a male student lands ontop of a FEMALE teacher. So from then on, I was pretty well known at school. Apparently, I still am.
Although, that doesnt make me a popular kid...Not at all...
But still, I dont think I act THAT depressed at school, or atleast to the point people would think I'd suicide..Do I..?
The bus was suddenly pulled to a stop and I realized I was at school already. Wow, listening to Bert McCracken sing about empty cup's and thinking about suicide..Didn't neccesarily think that would be the best way to pass time on a 15 minute bus ride to school..
As I stood up, I flipped my hair, making my bangs go slightly out out my face to expose one of my hazel eyes. Slowly but surely walking out of the bus, I hopped down the steps and towards the front doors. I paused. The smell of rain was heavy now. I really hope it doesnt rain while Im inside, were I cant enjoy the sight of it.
I breathed a heavy sigh and continued walking, draggin my feet as I did, hopped up the concrete stairs, and through the doors to Anthem Highschool.
Too many kids filled the hallways, and it was waaay to fucking loud. I regreted taking my head phones out of my ears, so I put them back in, and made my way to first period.
Trying to remember my schedule, I realized what I have for last period.
Math.
The subject I hate, the teacher whom hates ME, and at the school Id prefer not to be at.
Its all in a new day, Damion. ~
