Chapter 1

1:25PM Erm, hi. I'm Yuki Sohma… This is my first diary, so I'm not really sure what I'm s'pose to do… Miss Honda just gave you to me. But your pink— PINK! Kyo started cracking up(of course), Stupid Cat. Oh well, I'll live.

2:00PM
Gah! Ayame's here! Dammit! He's coming up the stairs…! Help me!

2:05PM
Oh thank God! Ayame has gone back down stairs to see Kyo and Shigure… I survived! No thanks to you, I might add. Anyway, Miss Honda is making lunch as we speak. Or rather as I speak and you just sit there, letting me write on your face. We're going to have riceballs. I wonder… I just had a brilliant idea! It'll take Ayame down! And maybe even that cat! I SHALL PUT LAXETIVE IN THEIR FOOD! Yes! Maybe even in Shigure's… He might stop going on about things I'd rather not mention.. Yes! The solution! Okay then, I'd better go do it now. I'll tell Miss Honda to only eat the leek riceballs. I'll only eat them too. I'll 'poison' the others. MUAH HA HA!

3:10PM
Well, lunch didn't go exactly how I planned, but it was still good! I'd better fill you in.
I went and told Miss Honda not to eat the other riceballs. She said okay. When we started eating, Aya got a leek riceball(grrr), but Kyo had a plum and Shigure too! They had the laxative. Oh it was funny. They both went sprinting for the bathroom, Kyo had to run upstairs. Ahh, happiness… And victory, too.

4:03PM
The dog and the cat are fine now. Ayame has left as well, but not without embarrassing me! BABY FREAKIN' PHOTOS! How did I survive? I don't know! I'm surprised Kyo even stayed conscious, the way he was laughing. Miss Honda was too, but not in a teasing way. They went shopping just now—Miss Honda and Kyo I mean—. If he makes a move on her I will destroy him! She's mine, dammit!

4:30PM
I think Kyo did something. I have a feeling in my bones…

5:37PM
Kyo DID do something! They just got back and Miss Honda is bright red. Stupid Cat! I
knew this would happen! I've gotta go kick his butt! I will be back!

6:10PM
I just made Kyo smash through the back door. He wasn't meant to go that far… Oops. Miss Honda keeps avoiding Kyo, so I'm expecting the worst. Eek. That damn cat will PAY! Anyway, I'm going to go and watch Ouran Highschool Host Club. Don't give me that look! I know it's a girls' anime, but I like it, so shut up.

6:45PM
Holy crap! That isn't how a series should end! WHY DIDN'T TAMAKI KISS HER!? Stop looking at me like that! Shut up ya damn bo—

7:18PM
Okay. Since you're finally dry, I can write again. So, in case you got confused, I just went and dropped you in the toilet, then tried to flush it. It started overflowing so I grabbed you out and ran up to my room where I started drying you with my hair dryer. Shigure was all like, 'Whoever clogged the toilet is dead!' In that singsong voice he always has. I blamed it on Kyo because he was standing close-ish to the bathroom.

7:56PM
We just had dinner. Miso soup. We're about to sit down to a 'family movie' as Shigure calls it. Not that I want to. I don't think Kyo wants to either, but Miss Honda's really excited, so that's the only reason I'm gonna do it…

8:50PM
Ahh! Save me from the bad anime! Oh the horror! Save me! *Shiver* Eck! I JUST WITNESSED THE WORST ANIME EVER! I can't believe Shigure made me watch that!

10:45PM
I've finally recovered from my traumatizing bad anime experience. Phew. That goddamn cat kept going on about it to get on my nerve. Ah. Well, I best be getting to bed. Goodnight.