I love you

That's what he wanted to say.

I love you

Of course he did. Will Solace loved Nico Di Angelo.

I love you

He couldn't tell him, though. He would be crazy to. Everything he so carefully built around Nico and himself would crumble. Being Nico's friend was hard enough. He pushed everyone that came too close, away. It had taken Will days and weeks and months to find a place in Nico's life.
He figured out that Nico didn't hide that much at night and had managed to make him open up. Maybe it had to do with the fact that he already had a mask on during the night: the darkness surrounding him. Maybe it had to do with the fact that other people were afraid of the dark. Maybe it had to do with the fact that everything was quiet during the night. Will didn't know. All he knew was that Nico let him in and that was enough. Because Nico was beautiful. On the outside, sure. But even more on the inside. A place few people knew. A place Will got to know through hard work and endurance.
Nico finally let Will see a part of him through friendship and Will wasn't ruining that simply by speaking. Maybe one day he'd have the courage to tell him how he felt. Even if it meant having Nico cut him off for good. But not tonight. He wasn't ready to risk that just yet.

I love you I love you I love you

That's what he wanted to say.
Instead he said: 'Goodnight, Death Boy.'

I love you

Nico wished he could turn that nagging voice inside his head off.

I love you

That voice that screamed at Will every time they were together.

I LOVE YOU

He wished he could turn it off and only because it spoke the truth.
Nico loved that dork so much it hurt. And he cursed himself for thinking that because it was exactly something Will would say.
He pushed his feelings down at first and tried to convince himself that the sparks he felt weren't the same sparks he had felt every time Percy had looked at him. Because that spark only brought him pain. His meeting with Cupid was still engraved in his memory. On the rare occasions that his nightmares weren't about being trapped in Tartarus or about losing all his friends like he lost Bianca, the dreams were about just that. He never understood why Cupid was portrayed like a chubby, cute thing when he was more like the devil.
The truth was that he was scared. He was scared of falling for Will Solace. He was scared of loving again and hurting more than he did before. Because the love he felt for Will was deeper and rawer and truer than what he had felt for Percy.
But he also knew that he couldn't hide it forever. Will was the sun (literally) and Nico was darkness. He could use some light in his life.

I LOVE YOU

The voice screamed harder this time. They were standing in front of the Hades cabin. The moonlight made Will's hair look more silver than blond. At night Nico wasn't that afraid. He felt comforted by the darkness. He felt like he could say anything and it wouldn't be as bad as during the day when he constantly had the feeling of standing in the spotlight.

I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU

Instead he said: 'Don't call me Death Boy, Solace.'

I love you

The voice was more of a whisper this time.
It was like the stars were pushing him by shining brighter than usual. He looked in Will's eyes and they were as blue as ever. With a jolt, he realized that they were what made him feel most at ease. Then I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU His brain would explode if he didn't let it out.
Will turned around to go back to the Apollo cabin and Nico couldn't take it anymore.
He said it. 'I love you.'

He immediately cursed himself for what he did. He saw Will's head shooting up, but he didn't move and just kept staring straight ahead of him. He had ruined everything, hadn't he? Now that he actually thought about it, this was probably the stupidest thing he'd ever done. His heart was beating so loud he wondered if Will heard it. And for a moment he seriously had the urge to disappear into the shadows and go live with Hades in the Underworld. It really wasn't that bad. He had been comfortable enough the first time he'd stayed there. But that was before he grew accustomed to having friends that cared about him. Before he fell in love with the sun and before the sun had chased all the shadows away. He couldn't go back to living in the dark. Not now that he knew how it felt to have some light in his life.

'Will, I – I'm sorry. Forget what I just said.' Will still didn't move. 'Will, please. Just – please. Say I didn't ruin everything.' At this Will did turn around. Nico had never seen him like that. There was something in his usually happy, blue eyes that Nico didn't recognize. It looked a lot like anger. He didn't say anything, but he came closer. 'I'm sorry. Can we forget this ever happened and just move on like not – ' Nico's speech was cut off by Will grabbing his shirt, pulling him closer and crashing their lips together with more violence than Nico had ever seen him use.
Nico was taken by surprise and didn't respond immediately. His mind hadn't processed the fact Will was kissing him. He just kind of stood there without moving for a couple seconds until Will tried to move their lips. That was the signal that did it. Nico realized just what was happening and that this was what he had dreamed about for so long. So he moved his mouth in sync with Will's and lifted his arms to touch his back. Will was clearly happy with his reaction because suddenly Nico was aggressively pressed against his cabin. His back hit the wall rather hard and the other boy kept kissing him. Not that he minded. His whole body was burning and the smoke had apparently gone to his head; His thoughts were a little fuzzy. He couldn't remember his own name, even if he wanted to. All he could think was WillWillWillWillWill and Oh Gods, Will is touching me and kissing me and I'm kissing Will and my back is against a wall with WILL pressing me against it and WillWillWillWIllWillWill.
But all of a sudden the fire went down and it was over. Nico was released and he looked up to see the boy in front of him. They were both breathing heavily and Nico's heart was racing like never before. His eyes met blue ones. Will was looking at Nico hesitantly, probably to check if what he just did wasn't incredibly stupid and to see if the smaller boy was doing okay.

He ran a hand through his golden curls. 'I'm… sorry?'

Nico raised his eyebrows. 'Are you really, William?'

'No, I'm not sorry at all, actually. It just seems like the thing to say. Because that was amazing and I really don't regret it.', he answered with a smile. It may have been dark outside; Will's smile contained the sun and lit up camp Half-Blood entirely. Nico hated how he got so cheesy when Will was involved.

'Well, that certainly wasn't the response I expected, but I guess it was okay.' At least the cheesiness stayed inside his head.

'Okay? Are you kidding me right now, di Angelo? You totally enjoyed that!, Will answered. 'And what exactly did you expect me to say, huh, Death Boy?' He looked Nico in the eye. 'Of course I'm in love with you, too.'
Those words filled him with such joy, Nico thought he might combust in confetti.

'I never said I was in love with you!', he huffed.

Will dramatically rolled his eyes at that and pulled Nico close. Whatever, Sunshine.'

'No!', Nico snapped and pulled away to look at Will.

'What?', Will answered in the same way.

'You are not calling me that. It's even worse than Death Boy!'

'I can't very well call you Darkness, can I?'

'You can call me Nico, though. Or di Angelo if you prefer.'

Will slowly shook his head and answered: 'No', he said. 'As your boyfriend I should – '

'Your boyfriend?', Nico exclaimed, his voice higher than usual, which already wasn't very deep. It had yet to break.

'Are you serious right now? You tell me you love me, but you don't want to be with me?', Will asked. He looked genuinely confused and a little hurt. Nico didn't want to hurt Will. Never.

'I do want to be with you. It's just… boyfriend? That sounds really dumb.'

'You're impossible!', Will said, throwing his hands up. He sighed and looked at Nico, amused. ' But I guess I should've seen that coming, knowing you.'
He moved closer to Nico and lowered his head to kiss him again. The smaller boy hated the fact that Will was so much taller and yanked his head down to crash their lips together. He felt Will smile against his lips and deepened the kiss.

I love you.

He didn't have to keep that little voice hidden inside his head anymore.

'I love you.', he murmured against Will's mouth.


A/N: Thank you so much for reading this. I hope you liked it and I appologize (see what I did there? It's lame, I know) for any mistakes. English is not my native language.
If you liked it, please tell me. And if you didn't, please tell me why so I can work on it. I would really appreciate that!
Oh, and am I the only one that suddenly has these images of Nico's voice breaking. Like, he's trying to be intimidating and suddenly his voice shoots up?

Love,
Vlindervin