It is a pleasant day and Armin spots Eren.
Armin: hey eren
Eren: Hey Armin!
Armin: how's the titan attacking coming along?
Eren: I'LL KILL THEM ALL!
Eren: How are you Armin?
Armin: well I'm smarter than you that's for sure
Armin: and my hair is a beautiful golden blond
Armin: so yeah I'm doing pretty good
Eren: ...yeah it is...
Armin: where's corporal levi
Eren: I have no idea
Eren: Why?
Armin: I haven't heard from him in a while
Armin: I'm worried
Eren: I think he's alright
Eren: He's our strongest soldier after all
Armin: true but from a mathematical standpoint, the percentage that he is
in danger is high enough for me to worry
Eren: Yeah... but he's always pulled through, he'll make it back
Armin: yes I suppose so
Eren: How's Mikasa?
Armin: he always pulls through, just as the gravitational pull of the
moon causes tidal waves
Armin: she's your sister, shouldn't you know
Armin: probably being a badass as always
Armin: she did rank number one in the trainees, you know
Eren: yeah... I haven't seen her in a while though
Armin: maybe she's with levi
Eren: Well if they're together... then I'm worried
Eren: they cant stand eachother
Armin: if they're together... there's a high probability that only one
will return
Eren: ...I'm worried about them. You really haven't seen her?
Eren: Maybe she's on another mission?
Armin: I haven't seen her no
Armin: do you wanna go look for them?
Eren: Erwin wants us here...
Armin: if we bring back levi and mikasa alive, I'm sure he'll be fine
Armin: you dumb shit
Armin: think eren think
Eren: Why are you being so rude Armin?
Armin: I'm nervous!
Eren: You're the better strategist... tell me what you want to do
and I'll follow
Armin: ok ok
Armin: but just like hydrogen peroxide my attitude is extremely volatile
at this moment
Armin: I think you should get your advanced gear out, advance hit erwin
to knock him out and we gotta advance find levi and mikasa quick
Eren: alright... and armin...
Armin: yes eren?
Eren: you're so hot when to talk smart
Armin: if we make it back alive, we will engage in sexual intercourse
eren
Armin: but first... oh no... my sensors indicate that corporal levi and
mikasa are outside the wall
Eren: You have sensors?
Eren: Alright I'll go knock out Erwin...
Armin: I modified my advanced gear to track levi and mikasa's signals
Armin: alright
Armin: let's go
Eren: *3DMGs up to Erwin and knocks him out*
Eren: That was... easy
Armin: why did you never do that before?
Eren: His eyebrows scare me...
Armin: me too eren
Armin: me too
Armin: let's go find the corporal and your sister
Eren: and then bang like you said right?
Armin: yeah of course
Eren: alright let's find them fast then
Armin: oh wait there they are
Eren: awesome
Armin: I'll go talk to them brb
Armin: k I'm back they said they were on a mission and we were worrying
for nothing
Armin: and they asked why erwin is on the floor with advanced gear up his
ass
Eren: I... didn't stick anything in his ass. What did you do?
Armin: uh...
Armin: let's go bang
Eren: Yes.
Armin: With Erwin knocked out, his quarters appear to be vacant. Let us
go commit sexual actions inside of it.
Eren: Alright, Armin...
Eren: Let's do this come on you sexy aryan coconut
Armin: Hold on, I made some more modifications to my advanced gear
Armin: Let me set its mode to pleasure
Eren: That thing looks fun...
Armin: It is scientifically designed to provide maximum comfort and
pleasure
Eren: Can it suck me off?
Armin: There is a vacuum attachment yes
Armin: It will be extremely painful, but a warrior like you should be
able to withstand it
Eren: Wait... we aren't gonna actually do it Armin?
Armin: Well, it has never gone through human trials
Armin: we must test iOH SHIT I ACCIDENTALLY GOT IT ON ME
Armin: FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUCK MY BALLS OH MY GOD
Eren: NO I WANTED TO DO THAT!
Armin: I think it stoNO IT'S BACK ON
FUCKFUKCUFCKFKFCKCFUCFUCKFUKFCCUKFUCKFUCFXK I'M DYING EREN
Armin: I TASTE GODDAMN COPPER AND MY LEFT ARM IS TINGLING
Eren: WHAT DO I DO ARMIN?
Armin: ... let me die eren
Armin: I have had my time on this earth
Eren: But Armin... I
Eren: I love you...
Armin: if I were to go out, I would want it to be like this, with a loved
on beside me and advanced gear giving me an advanced blow job
Eren: but I wanted to give you an advanced blowjob
Armin: ok go ahead do it
Armin: I have two seconds left
Eren: But that think is on your...
Armin: IGNORE IT
Armin: IF YOU REALLY LOVE ME
Eren: I-I... alright
Armin: thanks
Eren: get ready for the best jaegerbombastic blow job you've ever
recieved...
Armin: jaegerbombs away
Armin: let's do this thing before I kick the bucket
Eren: -starts licking the machine since its on your mini-Armin-
Armin: wow I think the power of true love is going to bring me back to
liNope I'm dead
Armin: DO DODODO DO DO DODODO ROLL CREDITS
Armin: THE END
Eren: ARMIN NOOOOOO
Armin: dadadadadada dadadadooooo
Eren: Whatever I guess I'll go screw Krista, she looks enough like
you
And that's all for Attack on Titan, kids! Make sure to tune in
next week and find out if Eren screws Krista!
Also in the next episode... uh oh, looks like a titan is
attacking... but Erwin is stuck at home with advanced gear up his ass!
What will our heroes do?!
Find out next week, on ATTACK! ON! TITAN!
THE END
