Crossover between Naruto by Masashi Kishimoto and A Little Undead by Laira Evans. I own nothing. Spoilers for all but the very ending of A Little Undead likely, Naruto spoilers negligible in early chapters of this work. Some parts may end up being AU.
Note: I'm nerfing some of the E-rank jutsus.
Theme: Angela/Julie the half-vampire-ish girl from A Little Undead is reincarnated as Sakura.
Chapter 1:
"Sakura, will you go out with me?" The blond was a bubbling ball of excitement, filled with the exuberance of youth. He was also seriously invading my personal space.
"For the last time Naruto, NO!" My fist made a very satisfying impact on his face. I wasn't proud of punching a 12 year old, but he did have it coming. Besides, if my punches truly bothered him I was sure he could dodge if he wanted to. The kid was as stupid and stubborn as a brick, but he did have some good reflexes when he was focused. Frankly it was a little disturbing that after hitting him in the face so many times he didn't even attempt to dodge. Lately I wondered if I wasn't feeding some masochistic fantasy of his.
"Quiet down!" Iruka blustered into the classroom officiously and proceeded to give a pompous speech about village pride and adulthood and shinobi pride. Personally I took it as an opportunity to nap.
"Hey!" I shouted as a piece of chalk pinged off my forehead. My henge wavered ever so slightly but I managed to hold it firm against the unexpected hit. I'd thought Iruka had given up on changing my sleeping habits years ago but apparently he couldn't let me go without a parting shot.
"On Team 7 is Sakura," I sat up a bit at that, he was getting to the good bit at last, "Sasuke, and Naruto."
"Damnit." I barely resisted the urge to slam my head into the desk as Naruto alternated between cheering that I was on his team and furiously warning away Sasuke from thinking about hitting on 'his' girl. This was proof that no good deed goes unpunished. I'd gotten so annoyed with him constantly proclaiming he was going to become Hokage that I'd told him he couldn't even become a ninja if he didn't pass the graduation exam. He'd been so inconsolable after that that I'd had to give him a hint on how to make a proper clone. Just my luck that now I'd be stuck with him for however long our team stuck together. Sasuke at least wasn't so bad. He was fairly emo and pissed me off at times with his stuck-up attitude but on the plus side he didn't socialize much which fit me just fine.
Fittingly for my luck, our instructor didn't show up in the first hour after the announcement. Or the second. Thirty some years of life between this life and last hadn't made me much better at waiting, and Naruto's blathering was getting on my last nerve. "Naruto just shut up already," I said irritably. Remarkably he actually did, switching to silently building some trap above the door. I'd just barely managed to fall back asleep when our jounin instructor made his appearance.
Chalk powder drifted down around him, somehow avoiding every spike of his silver-gray hair. Despite his hair color he seemed young enough, in his twenties from what little I could see of his face. He stopped just inside the classroom, cloth mask not moving as he spoke. "My first impression... is that I don't like you. I'll be waiting on the roof."
'Great... direct sunlight.' Naruto was bounding up the stairs instantly but Sasuke and I took a slower pace. Wasn't like promptness was a big concern for our jerk of a teacher. Reminiscent of some 1st grade bonding exercise we settled into a circle on the roof, our soon-to-be-teacher sitting on the raised rim of the roof to gain that extra foot of authority. 'Ponce.'
"Introduce yourself," said the man. "Likes, dislikes, dreams."
I didn't like the guy from the start and the following ten minutes didn't improve my first impression of him, but it was informative in a soul-crushing sort of way. Turned out Sasuke was deeply misogynistic, Naruto placed me on par with ramen for things he loved the most, and Kakashi couldn't be bothered to tell us more than his name. Considering supposedly two thirds of the teams would fail, Kakashi's unwillingness to share with us didn't speak highly of his confidence in us passing. All in all, I was starting to think someone deeply sadistic was running Konoha. Somehow I'd managed to get put with two terrible partners and now I found out that the graduation test was just a front for the real one. Considering it had taken me three tries to pass the first test, well, 'I'm screwed, aren't I.'
The night before our true test passed like any other. I went home to my family, did my chores, suffered through an awkward dinner, then retreated up to my room to read. I didn't keep my henge on home. When I was younger I hadn't had the chakra to keep it going all day, and at this point suddenly changing my appearance would cause more problems than it solved. All it would do is remind my parents of all my oddities. Because of this, when my bedroom mirror caught my eye it was the face of an unbearably cute pink-haired six year old staring back at me. Honestly, slowed aging was annoying enough the first time around. I'd be fifty by the time my body was eighteen. At least the drinking age was lower in Konoha than back in my old world. Actually, I was technically a Genin now. Legally I was an adult, though it was doubtful anyone would serve me alcohol unless I was henged.
Just like in my old life I had energy to spare at night. Side affect of being part vampire I supposed. It hadn't gotten any better with my reduction of age. Childhood jitteryness combined with my vampiric energy meant that actually sitting down to read was virtually impossible for me. Luckily when I was younger I'd managed to build an elliptical out of wood, rope, and some scrap metal. It was hardly state of the art, but it kept my muscles moving enough to stay focused. Today it was a physiology textbook I was working on. It was very dry material, detailing each and every muscle in the human body and how they flexed. It was necessary though. Little things like this made my illusions more convincing. Some of the instructors made it look easy, but good illusions weren't easy. Most students called it good with the academy henge that involved forming an illusion of a boulder around themselves, but I required something a little more detailed in order to pass as an older version of myself.
Eventually I slept, though not until long after midnight. It felt like only a moment passed before my extra-loud alarm clock woke me with the sun. Despite Kakashi's warning to not eat I made myself a large breakfast anyways. Given my tendency to grow fangs when sufficiently hungry, skipping meals wasn't really an option. Once I finished my second cup of extra-strength coffee I was ready to go. Trying not to think about how the coffee might stunt my already glacial growth I slipped out the door and started jogging. I really had to make chuunin as quickly as possible. This waking up at dawn business was going to ruin me. I might not be a full burn-in-the-sun vampire, but I just wasn't made for this sort of schedule.
I tripped as I caught sight of the clock tower. Seven o'clock already? I must have dozed off during my breakfast. 'Hopefully I'm not the only one running an hour late.' It was probably too little too late, but I sped up into a full out run. Thankfully the sun wasn't too high in the sky yet or I'd never make it to the training ground at the pace I was setting. I had to weave through the crowds as the streets rapidly filled, but thanks to my height and slimness that was really no issue.
There was a lot of things about my old world that I missed, despite the zombie apocalypse, but there was one advantage to being reborn in Konoha. Back on Earth a lot of people would have thought it odd to see six-year-old running through the street unaccompanied, but here no one cared. The only thing that shocked them (the few that saw it) was the Konoha emblem I was wearing around my waist that signified my status as a genin. 'I might have to start wearing my henge around town now, too.' But not today. To conserve my chakra I waited until I was a few hundred yards from the training ground Kakashi had specified before reapplying me henge to make myself look twelve. "Yay, twelve again," I said sarcastically, checking to make sure I had my voice modulating correctly. Well, at least it was better than six.
Sasuke didn't seem terribly pleased with my late arrival.
End chapter 1: Because a chapter isn't a chapter unless it ends mid-paragraph for no particularly good reason.
I realize this chapter may have been a bit confusing and info-heavy. Hopefully chapter 2 will be smoother.
