The Creature
The walk from Town hall was painfully quiet and just plain painful to walk. The grouchy short horse that was escorting me did not say a single word since we left her place of work. Honestly, I did not really want to hear her talk anymore. Why? Because during the whole time, from when I had to limp quickly with a nurse that had led me to the town hall, to sitting uncomfortably in a waiting room lobby while under the constant watch of both a security horse and/or other pastel ponies that watched me from afar. I honestly think anyone there really liked me just being there. Hours later, I finally got to talk to this secretary, who, in an isolated, one-on-one crash course of the laws and other nonsense, it get "welcomed" to what is called Ponyville. At least there were no papers to fill because she didn't provide me with any.
Mind you, I was hurting all over during this whole time, I honestly believe I was let out way too soon. What few horse/pony/whatevers that was still out about, stopped to watch the strange, bandaged covered, limping creature stagger through town.
When we stopped at this place, the secretary, in the growing darkness of night, again introduced me to my new place or what looks like a shack in between some distant houses.
She didn't even bother to wait for a reply or any questions for she promptly turned around and trotted away into the dark. Leaving me standing before this run down P.O.S. place before me. With hoofsteps fading away, I took a (stinging) deep breath before stepping up to the door.
Fumbling with the only key, I felt it fall from my pocket and clinked on the ground. "Really?" I blinked at the ground before slowly bending down, with pain and soreness shooting across my body mind you, to pick up the blasted key. "Now, the return trip." slowly standing up, I can feel my joints, muscles and recent stitches throb and ache in complaint.
Not waiting to stand fully straight, I jabbed the key into the keyhole to unlock the door.
A wave of heat poured through the door as if the house was holding the heat in all day, oh wait, it was. Shrugging the heat off, I staggered into the house. The place was empty, obviously broken in most places, probably a neglected or abandoned residence from a time long ago. Yet, I got no choice but to call it home.
"Fuckin' horses..." I promptly replied as I clapped the door shut behind me. I tossed the bag of "provisions" onto the table in the living room. The living room itself was bare bones in terms of furniture: Two pony sized chairs set against a table which stood close to the kitchen, next was the pony-sized sofa that must have seen better days, no carpeting, just hardwood flooring that one would think the ground the house stood on was visible through the planks.
The kitchen itself wasn't the best either No fridge but an ice box that needed to be simply tossed into a junk pile, the cupboards were empty upon inspection; I noticed two sinks but the usual faucet was missing, so there was no complete plumbing in the house. When I looked out the back door, I found at least something worthwhile, a large, hand-cranked, water pump that spouted water into a basin, or trough maybe? A ladle hung off one side of the metal half drum, which I put to use right awa- "Gah, the hell is wrong with the water?!" I spat the water out after the first sip, it was obviously warm and it must have stayed sitting out in the opening for probably as long as the house did; for all, I know this batch of water was rainwater collected over the months before I got here.
I stirred the water around a bit before trying again, less warm but drinkable.
Leaving the dipper in the water, I went back inside to rummage through the grab bag that was given to me thanks to the folks in the hospital as well that bitchy Secretary that works for the mayor. I set out the various items on the table:
let's see:
Got one flashlight, at least there won't be any lamp oil to burn me or the house down with, thank god.
Some bandages, well, probably enough gauze to mummify yours truly.
A basic hygienic kit.
A bundle of parchment paper
Inkwell with a quill and some spare tips; huh, guess I gotta teach myself calligraphy now.
Some food
Then a small pouch, empty, yeah empty.
"Better than nothing." I admitted with a shrug before pausing to look over the "gifts" again; that is when i realized that there was something off with the bundle of food that was given to me. My mind at least registered it as odd since all I found in it was green stuff. Not rotten, just, veggies.
"Riight..." I arranged the items out of the bundle to take count.
Most of the veggies currently present here, were all long-term storage items like carrots, potatoes, celery and so on. Didn't expect to see anything leafy, probably because no one knows what a human really eats. Then again, Nor do I half the time since I tend to throw money at Burger King or Papa Johns. With a shrug, I hung a carrot from my mouth as I arrange the newly gotten gains into the kitchen, casually gnawing on it like a cigar.
Normally, back home, stocking veggies of any kind was the last thing on my list when it came to getting food, then again, I never really bought veggies in the first place; reason being that I never really ate'em in any kind of meal or even snacked on any greens. However, taking the fact that I am in a world where omnivores are supposedly non-existent so no surprise that no meats of any kind showed up in the small cache given to me.
Cutting the thought of food short, I turned away from the kitchen and walked down the hall to explore the rest of this run down heap. discarding the leafy nub of the carrot into the unlined trash bin.
There were only three rooms in this way, two bedrooms, and a bathroom. First, the bathroom.
The door creaked open into a room with the basics, a toilet, and shower, both pony sized. My mind shuddered at the grade of a civilization of these peop-ponies-whatever with the thought of how the porcelain throne was used. Shaking the dark brain matter into the back of my skull I peeked into the shower to check it's functionality.
The shower was the size of a small luxury suite shower, probably a little cramped for one of those horse folk; However, for a human, heaven, I'm in- before i could finish reciting, the pipes coughed a familiar russet colored water from the shower head.
"Oh god!" I pulled back before I got coated in rust water. First, it was nothing but that rust water for a minute or so, "at least the plumbing works." I commented aloud as the rust cleared from the shower head. Seeing the water running, all I could think of how inviting the shower was (also, noting how half-assed the plumping in this house is now).
"Maybe later." Turning the water off, I left the bathroom to check out the rooms, which of course there wasn't much to see in either of them. Only the master bedroom still had a basic dresser and a decently furnished bed, though it didn't have sheets but had a pillow and a simple quilt laid on top of what is probably a queen size mattress to accommodate the size of the previous occupant.
charming, at least I got somewhere to sleep.
With shrug, I returned to the kitchen/living room to collect the rest of my feeble grab bag to relocate it to the bedroom. Through the cracks in the door, back door and the living room window, the last of the sunlight was visibly gone. Thinking about it, I dug out the flashlight to see if it worked.
After a flash of bright light, I blinked my eyes back into focus as I turned the flashlight away, "oh! Yeah, It works."
With modern torch in hand, I shined my way around the house to see about locking the place down for the night, at least here I can see whereas before I was tripping over roots jutting out of the ground or running into trees or knocking into rocks and so on; So much for giving up my previous flashlight, that I kept in the car originally, to someone else before that happened.
First, was the front door: no real bolts only holes in the door where a deadbolt used to be; Irony...
Felt unsure about this world for one, Wouldn't even begin to think who or what could barge in here. I'm weaponless, lockless and above all, healthless! Which a decent throb, that rolled across my injured skull, reminded me of that. Taking a moment to hold my head in shame and pain, I staggered over to the back door, again no way to lock the damn thing.
At this point, I wondered if it would be considered murder to ground a sentient horse into glue for giving me such a shitty place to live in. Might as well live in a god damn barn! Anger was, sadly, coming to the surface out of this, which also was agitating my healing injuries.
"FUCK!" A fist thudded against the wall out of the pain in my body which now apparently took me for a ride that I couldn't get off from.
"Stop it, Jeff," I scolded myself, "Getting mad will only make things worse." I groaned as a rain of pinpricks fell out from around the bandages that decorated my body. My head was sore enough from that apparently rushed citizen orientation, now the knocks that caused the gash in my scalp was reverberating from memory.
After putting my mood into a full nelson, I took a deep breath. Take it in, then let it out slow- Pain shot across my abs and ribs that caused me to freeze out of pain. The pain was intense enough that I could hear my voice make noise that was coherent enough to make one "ow." I gently tucked an arm against my stomach as I propped myself against the wall with the other hand.
Those Wooden dogs did a bigger number on me than I thought, "Pills...!" came out of my mouth wincing from just turning around. I had to get to the bag, STAT! I forced my will down my legs and into my feet to take at least a zombie-style-shuffle down the hall and into the bedroom.
So far, this would count as the third time this had happened, today alone at least.
Using the flashlight, I found the bag on the bed, right where I had left it. Lowering myself onto the bed and taking the flashlight with my mouth, I rummaged through the bag, till, "'ills 'ere!" I held the large bottle that rattled with the veterinarian sized, prescription pills. Again, a sign that not of either:
A. Humans have not really advanced this far
or
B. Humans didn't really exist till now
A twang of pain derailed that train of thought as I twisted the cap off. I didn't feel like moving from this bare bed to go get water, so I had to take two of these thumbnail-sized pills dry. Capping the bottle, I flopped back on the mattress, letting the teeth marked flashlight fall from my mouth as the tornado of agony left its trail across my body.
Obviously, there would be no sleeping from this, so all I could do was lay here; Which sucks too, this mattress is rather comfy. Lost track of time while laying here, could feel some of the effects, which, let's face it: An ibuprofen dose meant for horses or ponies would be a-correction-is a blessing for a human, but man it's hell on the liver.
Of course, before sleep could carry me away from my conscious, there was an audible knock from somewhere. With an agitated groan, I pulled myself off the bed to stagger out of the room grabbing my flashlight in the process. The knocking sounded like it was coming from the living room, "Front door..." I concluded as I stood leaning against the corner of the hall peering at the front door.
After another knock, "Hang on, Hang on!" I called out as I wobbled off the wall and towards the door. Can't help but ponder on who it could be, Probably someone-pony-whatever coming by to harass me probably about something; or maybe someone from town hall coming to check on me or something typical like- I opened the door, "What?" I asked with a hint of agitation, groggy from the pill. I'm starting to think that it wasn't ibuprofen they gave me.
Wincing away from the flashlight's beam, a horse, correction pony, stood before the opened door. The pony's coat was purple, her mane was black with a magenta highlight neighboring a dark violet lowlight. She blinked away from the flashlight, she stared at a bandaged me with a combination of curiosity and intimidation. She didn't say anything so- "Can I help you?" I asked breaking the moment of awkward silence.
"Oh-uhm, Sorry," she stammered, "I uh, I wanted to see the new resident of this house," she cleared her throat, "Word around Ponyville is that a strange creature was released from the hospital today, sooo, I had to come by to see for myself."
"Creature? Really?" I cocked a brow at the mare. To be the more correct little lady, it is you guys that are the creatures, not me! "I don't think that would be the best way to describe me," I politely corrected.
"Oh, huh, then what are you?" She asked, a layer of bravery grew over this horse, guess she wasn't really intimidated by my appearance. guess not everyon-pony was scared of a human, which can be equally terrifying because the last thing I want is to be interviewed on every basic question on the face of the freaking earth.
"If you like, why don't you come in and we'll talk some more about me?" I offered, trying to keep anger off the controls, "I mean unless you like standing out here like a door-to-door sales horse."
"Pony," she smiled correcting me without missing the beat.
"Pony, right."
"But, you are right though, May we come in?" I stood to the side, holding the door open for my new guest, "Spike," she called to someone, correction guests- "wait, what?" In the beam of my flashlight, I saw a reptilian looking critter walking alongside the pony as they entered. Recalling from the tabletop games, this little guy looked like a walking dragon about the size of a toddler, it scales was a shade brighter of the pony with a bright green under scales complete with matching color spines that ran from the top of his head down to the spade pointed tail.
"Whos the walking lizard?" I asked not really noticing the bluntness in it.
The little dragon frowned, "Lizard?!" he jabbed a claw/finger at me, "Do I look like a lizard to you, you," he paused, "Pink, hairless, thing!"
I just blinked at the, talking, walking, toddler dragon; thankfully I didn't fall over out of the sheer W.T.F. that was going through my mind at the moment. Collecting my thoughts, "Really, That's the best you got?" The little tyke's face furrowed before he turns towards the mare with arms folded with a well placed, "HMPH!"
"Spike, be nice." The purple horse scolded quickly before looking back at me, "Sorry about him, he seems a little off today." she glanced at the little dragon who drifted away from my comment and started to explore my house. "Say," I looked from the little dragon to her, "No pony didn't really tell me what your name was,"
"Jefferson," I told her casually, "Jefferson Revere, and you?"
She smiled with a polite nod, "Twilight Sparkle." she then furrowed a brow in curiosity, "So Jefferson-"
"Jeff," I corrected, I could hear the little dragon moving about my house,
"eesh, what a dump.." his only comment.
"SPIKE!"
"No, no, It's true, this place wasn't my ideal choice either." I waved the comment with a shrug, "I don't think that secretary didn't really like me when she gave me the key to this place."
"Secretary?" Twilight's ears perked cocking her head inquiringly, "Wait, what did she look like?"
"Well, she was paper white with faded, lemon yellow hair," I remembered that sour horse to the detail, "talked like she was grouchy slow, kinda like a Female Ben Stein." I paused to remember, "She sounded like, You did file your citizen paperwork, right?" I mimicked her voice, well made a poor attempt, "uh not really; oh great, might as well just walk you through it then..."
"Oh Sisters..." The Mare placed a hoof on her face, "That sounds like Sour Words." She groaned lowering her hoof; she turned to the saddlebags that she carried. Something glowed on her head and the flap to one of the bags opened, an object floated out of the bag that found itself onto my table. she then looked over to my dinner table where a chair glowed in the matching magenta aura then proceeded to float towards her.
Once the chair was on the floor and she took her seat she turned back to the object on my coffee table and it flickered to life with a yellowish glow, "wha-who?" I was perplexed by the lantern that came to life, the floating inanimate objects and the jumble of words. "Sour words, one of the secretaries that work for Mayor Mare."
"M-Mayor Mare?" What are these things you call others?!
"You know, the Mayor of Ponyville." She looked at me starting to look confused as she was setting the saddlebags down.
"Right, but what about Sour Words?" I asked stupidly, I was still processing the floating objects while I watch her take some items out of her bags. A book, a quill and a small black jar. Oh great, she is probably going to ask me questions or something.
"Sour Words, that's who unfortunately welcomed you to our town,"
"Sooo, Sour Words is her name?"
"Yeah, You didn't know that?"
"Nnope, I thought you had a dyslexic moment or something."
"What?"
"Just kidding." She opens the book and lays it across her lap,
"So Jeff," the quill she took out was floating beside her head, the glow came from what looked like a sharpened chunk of ivory in her forehead, "If you don't mind, I got some questions and maybe I can give you a proper welcome to our town or even our world."
Fuuuck, she IS going to interview me. Really? When I'm just barely recovering from being run over by the pain panzer?! Might as well get over with it. "Yeeah, I-I guess I can, but first, how are you doing that?" I pointed to the floating quill.
She looked at the quill then her eyes looked upwards at the glow coming from her head, she then looked at me and casually replied with "Levitation magic," followed by a casual shrug. Levitation magic eh? So that must mean...
"So, that must mean that is a horn or something producing that magic." At least my tabletop knowledge didn't fail me here.
"Yep," Twilight nodded with a smile, "It's how unicorns, like myself, can do most of what others can't do."
"You're a unicorn," I gestured to her, still warping my brain around the magic details, "Damn, I must've smashed my head harder than I thought..." I held my head feeling a faint headache coming back, "So, that makes you the first one I met since I came here." Twilight was already busy with writing, the quill scribbling away. I could make out the ink on the pages, but nothing really resembled words as she had taken her seat opposite of me with me planted on the couch.
"You have met Doctor Horse though right?"
"There was mentioning of a Doctor but that was during when I was slipping in an out of sleep (or consciousness) at the hospital," I admitted, indeed the memories of the hospital were mostly fuzzy. "Let me tell you, they had no Idea who or what I was, so they had some sort of security detail there." I added thinking back at the one time I did try to escape, "Nothing like trying to outrun two of your kind with a sprained leg and cracked ribs." I chuckled lightly, my healing ribs tingled from the thought. "When they ran me down, It almost felt like my ribs were going to shred my lungs from the impact alone." Yep, getting police tackled by two two-hundred pound security guard ponies felt like getting run over by a Chevy S10.
"Oh geez," the pony seemed to cringe at the thought too, "I'm sorry, I don't think you had a fair time to recover," she admitted with a sheepish chuckle. "However, I am sure you'll feel better tomorrow."
"Probably, (doubt it though)."
"Pardon?"
"I mean, Probably right, I should be in a better mood tomorrow." I quickly agreed with a nod. If getting in a wreck caused this, then, by all means, take me off the meds and throw a straight jack on me, now! "Of course, something tells me you are not really here for the simple questions are ya?"
"eh-heh, not really." she smiled nervously, her ears dropped slightly, "I just got one interesting question and-"
"What am I?" she froze in mid-sentence, her jaw hung open before recomposing herself in an eye blink.
"Yes, that's right Jeff, What are you?" she apparently didn't want to offend me by borderline-interrogating me for something as personal as that, but ya know what? Lets humor the little pony.
"Well, I am a Human and to save you the trouble of asking, No, I do not know how I got here," I explained with excitement fading away. I can feel the pill starting to throw the sleepy cloud overhead. I think I should wrap it up here, " the only thing I can recall is this, one second I was driving off road in my car, drove through a fog then BAM! I ended up in the forest that almost killed me."
"You mean the Everfree forest?" she asked, the book was floating in front of her face, it lowered slightly for her eyes to peek out over the top.
"Yep, but that is a bit of an Ironic name if you ask me." I pointed out, which was true, irony almost killed me in the form of some wooden-puppet dogs. Could've sworn it was like the forest itself was alive and wanted to murder me faster than shock treatment.
"So, you don't know how you got here?" The dragon (surprisingly) chimed in, he had seated himself beside his companion.
"Again, I wouldn't know. All I can care about right now is that I managed to crawl out of that hell hole with my life clenched in my mouth." I drifted off into absent thoughts as I leaned forward, my head propped on a clenched fist. My memory was and still is a fuzzy blur, as well every time I try to remember anything, my headache slammed on the breaks. "If anything, I ponder if surviving the forest was a mista-"
"Well then," she finished writing something in her book before sticking a tip less quill into the pages as a bookmark. The audible clap of the book being closed brought me back into reality, "How about we start a'new tomorrow?" she asked, I looked up at her quizzically.
"What do you mean?" Part of me wanted to tell her not ever am I leaving this house; however, I've already gone through my paranoid stages in the hospital so, I guess there was really no point in mentioning anything at all. Her visit so far had been a little odd but I guess there has to be a reason behind it all.
"Well, what I mean is that I feel that you and this town have gotten off on the wrong hoof, sooo, maybe when you are able and not, well-"
"-Half dead?" Spike finished looking up at Twilight.
"-Half asleep," she returned his glance with a brief scowl.
"Sounds nice an' all," I butted in, "But, why are you stickin' your neck out for a complete stranger like me and even going as far as willing to show him around this little town of yours?" My thoughts flowed freely, I guess my politeness was switched off due to tiredness, "Don't take me wrong or nothin' but for all we know I could be some inter-dimensional terminator sent here to raze this perfect little world to the ground."
"That would be cool, in a, deathly chaotic sort of way-"
"Jeff," Twilight ignored her companion completely, "I can see right now that you don't seem to be like that, otherwise you would've walked out of the forest unscathed, so the terminator thing, unbelievable; second of all, you wouldn't of made it out of Ponyville if you tried to "raze" any part of our world to the ground." she kept her demeanor casual, but her words were heavy enough to crush me.
"Good point," was all I could manage, knowing unicorns, just them alone would be able to cleanly dismantle me before I could blink as well not knowing what else is out there is also what made me eat my own words.
"Besides," she was packing her things while we were talking, so at this point, it was a matter of slipping the saddlebags back on, "You don't look like the destructive type, to begin with, no offense of course."
"None taken." I shrugged.
"Yeah, you probably would have trouble hurting a parasprite if you tried." Spike's chimes were starting to bug me, little did I realize that I and Twilight had tag-teamed him with frowns; "What?" he shrugged.
"Point being," She looked back at me, "You look like somepony that has a good head on his shoulders and would make sense of things before acting."
"Huh, I guess you can say that about me." I nodded sleepily.
As she got up, she floated the chair back to where it belonged, "besides, I can be a good judge of character at times." Spike snickered at her comment. Couldn't help but question if that is accurate about herself or not. "Anyways, We should get going, it's late and we got a big day tomorrow."
"Of course," I lifted myself off the couch and wobbled lightly towards the door to open it for them.
"Oh, you didn't need to get up-"
"It's only polite, even totally beat up as I am." I smiled lightly, my body felt like someone had set me on fire.
"Well okay." she and spike took went through the door, "Hope you feel better tomorrow, Jeff." she looked back at me, concern was on her face but she kept her cheerful act up pretty well.
"I hope so too." I smiled back before closing the door; when I did, "hope you feel better? might as well of given him a "Get well soon" card while we're at it." I could hear spike's snarky voice as they moved farther away.
"Oh can it little lizard." Twilight teased quickly, Without seeing it, one would tell that would've made the tyke dragon twitch at the lizard comment, coined by yours truly of course.
"Don't you start on that too little lady, I forbid it!" Their banter faded with distance while I willed my feet to turn around and- she forgot the lantern, "she forgot her lantern," I blinked at it before staggering over to it. The device flickered with yellowish light as it had done before and since now I am close to it, I can see what looks like little bugs inside of it.
I didn't want to even begin to ponder on it so I turned the knob one way so that the light faded away to darkness. Brandishing my flashlight, I walked back into my new/old room. Taking a slow seat on the mattress, I couldn't help but feel a little awkward having such strange visitors so soon in my arrival or even my first night here.
I dare not think any more on it because as soon as I fell over onto the bed, the caseless pillow broke the fall.
Sleep apparently came faster than I thought...
