Mr. and Mrs. Specter: The Separation
Chapter 1
They had been separated for only a few months, but it was now Christmas time and the emptiness of not being together hit him in his heart like he had been felled by a bullet. He missed his children. They were growing by the minute, but they were still young enough for him to tuck them in at night with a kiss and a hug. He especially missed the youngest at only a year and a half old. She was just like his wife all redhair, fair complexion, and big green eyes which sparkled when he tickled her which dissolved into infectious baby giggles making everyone in the whole house smile.
Above all, he missed her, his wife. They saw each other at work but she decidedly would not interact with him. Especially now that a case that had embroiled him had crossed the Atlantic sea involving his ex almost girlfriend from so long ago.
He thought of calling her, his wife, but he was afraid she would refuse him access again. It was not as if he meant what happened to happen it just had.
He had not meant to take things that far with his long ago almost girlfriend, but he had been so happy to see her after so long. Yes, she was still raising her niece who was no longer a little girl, but a teenager and accompanied her much beloved aunt to the States. He remembered being lectured that he had not brought flowers for his date a long time ago. The beautiful blonde teenage girl now blushed when the memory was brought to the forefront. Impulsively, knowing that he had to speak with her aunt about the case, he invited them both to dinner. Dinner had been great and he had accompanied them both back to the two rooms in The Carlton where her firm had put them up for the few weeks they would be in the USA before Christmas. After dropping her niece at her door, he walked her to the other door and that's when things became clouded in his mind. She had not seen his wedding ring and the thought had not occurred to her that he may have been married with children. She had only known him briefly before when he was that man with the gorgeous smile and never stayed with one woman for too long not wanting to get caught in a commitment or show real emotion. She kissed him and he found himself kissing her back forgetting his wife and three kids at home. His wife said she had work she could take home while he worked on the case. With a kiss as she left the office, he watched her sashaying to the elevator sad that tonight they would not be with each other on the ride home. The thought of his wife had suddenly left his mind when his dinner companion had kissed him. He was catapulted back in time and found that he had missed the taste of her lips. He was suddenly thrown into the past forgetting who he was now. She had run the keycard through the lock and they stumbled into the spacious room, still fervently kissing, and he found himself dragging her to the bed. It was only when the dim light caught the gold and diamonds of his wedding band that he halted any further progress.
She sat up then because his loving ministrations had ceased. "Oh my God, you're married, Harvey. Why didn't you tell me?"
"I thought you would have seen my ring but I got so caught up in the case and the past and what might have been that the subject of Donna didn't come up."
They had taken seats on the couch across the room far away from the bed when Zoe had started to apologize that she had not put two and two together.
"Donna? Donna Paulsen? She's now COO? Did you know she doesn't use her married name professionally when she signs official papers? That's why I had no idea. I am so sorry, Harvey. You'd better go."
"You didn't come in the office first before we met for dinner. She has her full name on the outside of her office. She did it as a favor to me when Jessica agreed to promote her. Don't think badly of Donna not wanting to use her married name professionally. It's just better for new employees and such. They find out the truth once people start working there."
Zoe then placed her hand on his arm and asked looking into those deep dark eyes, "If she makes you happy and you really do love her than that's all that matters. Who cares what anyone else thinks? Are you happy and in love with your wife, Harvey?"
Harvey smiled wide and it met his eyes. He placed his hand on her cheek. "Yes, Zoe, I am very happy and I have been in love with Donna, I think, since the time I first saw her. It just took me an awfully long time to realize it. I know you probably think that's silly coming from me since you know who I used to be."
Zoe then kissed his cheek and said, "No, I saw how you cared for her at your mock trial those many years ago. I knew there was something there. I assume she's good to you. Do you have children?"
"Yes, I have three," Harvey said holding up his three fingers. Then like any proud father he took out his phone and flipped through the most recent pictures of Amanda, 8, Gordon 7, and MacKenzie 1 -1/2. In the flipping of the photographs there was also the latest family portrait taken last month for Christmas card usage.
"You have a beautiful family. Donna was always a beautiful woman, and I surmised by her loving care of you that she loved you so very much. I'm so happy that you have found happiness. You are really a good man."
"Really, when you kissed me, I totally forgot about my wife and children. About my happiness. You don't know why I was the way I was, afraid of commitment and womanizing, but Donna did and she loved me anyway. Events happened and I came to realize that I really wanted a wife, a home, and eventually children and the only person I wanted those things with was-Donna."
"That's wonderful. I was married and I have a son who's home in England, but like my brother my husband had cancer. He died only six months ago, so I guess this is sort of my fault. I was lonely and I thought, perhaps, I could find something I lost. My niece is not in school at the moment, so she was happy to come to the US with me. My son, Henry, is only five and he is home with my aunt."
Zoe then rose from the table and walked Harvey to the door. She kissed his cheek again and he kissed hers back and gave her a smile. He felt bad for her. He felt bad for himself because he needed to tell Donna what happened. She was not going to be happy; however, Harvey hoped Donna would understand. She knew him best. Harvey felt he had thrown his loyalty and devotion to his wife and children down the drain by that one kiss. Well, it was not so much the kiss itself but what he had wanted to do that tore at him.
He had arrived home very late that night having spent some time in a bar nursing a couple of scotches pondering his dilemma whether to take the cowardly way out or to confront his wife and try to explain it in a way that she would understand that it really had not meant anything to him.
Harvey had arrived home and Donna had fallen asleep at the desk in their bedroom. She had her head down and to the side on top of her crossed hands on top of a manila expanded legal file. He put his arms around her and inhaled her lavendar and vanilla scented hair. He placed a kiss on her head and Donna began to stir.
"Harvey?" Donna had asked shaking the sleep out of her head. "What time is it?"
Quietly he reach down with his lips and kissed hers letting himself linger feeling so glad he was home.
Donna turned around and rose from the desk. She immediately loosened his tie seeing that haggard look on his face. She removed his tie and kissed his lips and then his neck sweetly. He suddenly took her hands away and held them in his.
"What is it? Is the case complicated? How is Zoe? I know it's been a long time..."
"Donna, I need to tell you something now. If I don't it will fester and I don't want us to be angry with each other, ok?" He asked her kissing her hands and looking at her hoping to see sympathy and courage in her gaze. The courage he got but he also saw something else in her face.
"What is it?" Donna asked trying to see the secret in his gaze but right now he looked away and then she knew that he had been feeling guilty about something.
"Donna, tonight, after dinner with Zoe and her niece, I accompanied them back to their hotel rooms. Well, time passed so quickly and suddenly Zoe kissed me."
"What are you telling me, Harvey?" Donna now knew why he was hedging and seemingly obsequious. He was ashamed.
"We kissed at the door and then we kissed inside the room and we landed on the bed and..."
Donna swallowed hard. Harvey, unfaithful and disloyal, how could that happen? This man has had infidelity issues from the first time she met him.
"You slept with her, didn't you, Harvey?"
He could hear Donna's angry words in his head, "You, of all people, to forget you were married until Zoe took things into her own hands waiting for you to make that final move."
She had continued to rant on how she never thought with all his fidelity issues which had finally been worked through and reconciled before his mother died that he would be the one to stray. Well, they have been married for more than seven years. Seven year itch was thought to have been traveled through safely. Donna guessed not now.
"Donna! Stop! No I didn't sleep with her, but I wanted to," Harvey said and immediately regretted it. Maybe being that honest was not good in a marriage. Harvey did not know. He never had a very good example to show him. His mother had him keep her secrets until finally his father beat it out of him in the boxing ring. Harvey always thought that he could never screw up as badly as this.
Donna threw his tie across the room along with the tie clasp that she had also removed.
"What the hell does that mean? You wanted to? Is sex that boring now that you're now thinking of being disloyal? I never thought we would be having this conversation. I thought for sure if anyone was going to cheat it would have been me."
Donna began to cry and she turned away from him when he tried to explain that he would never do that.
"Sex is never boring with you. I am on fire when I touch you. You consume me and always have. You are an amazing woman in bed and I would be a fool to throw you away. I know you get offers to be unfaithful to me. I am proud that other men want you. I know how lucky I am" Harvey said trying to get her to turn to him so he could shower her with affection and make her understand that it was a just a moment of weakness that he never would have gone through with his thoughts.
She then turned to him and passionately threw his pillow at him along with his t-shirt and pajama bottoms.
"You know what, Harvey? You can contemplate how sorry you are and how much you would never complete your actions while you sleep in there on the cot in the baby's room," Donna said harshly pointing to the adjacent room where the baby slept peacefully. "Or better yet," she said smiling sarcastically stomping up to him and taking the pillows, pajamas, and the blanket from the end of their bed and swiftly slammed them on the couch in the living room. "Here," she commanded as she pointed downward to the sofa.
She stomped back into the bedroom and jumped into their bed turning out the light and leaving Harvey standing there dumbfounded.
Harvey still sat outside in his car in front of their big house. The clouds above reflected his lousy mood. It had been three weeks since Donna had decided to take the children and retreat to the West Chester house. Donna had removed the children from their swank private school taking work home with them so they would not fall behind. She had taken her own work home because it was getting too hard to be with him not only in the office but at home as well. Donna had mentioned that as long as Zoe was in town she could not work in the office. She also had reiterated to Harvey that this was one reason why one should not eat where they shit.
Harvey remembered how angry he was with her at that remark when he had done everything in his power to make his wife understand that nothing really happened except a kiss.
"What do you mean by that remark, Donna? I guess I'm the shit in this situation, aren't I? " He had shouted at her.
"Harvey keep your voice down! We're at the office for heaven's sake!" Donna protested.
"Fine. Go back to the West Chester house. I won't follow you, but you just explain to the kids that daddy is not away because he wants to be."
"Leave the kids out of this! I would never damage you in their eyes. They love you so much and I know how much you love them," Donna said and turned away because her tears had started to flow.
She walked out of his office then when all he wanted to do was call her back and love her right there in front of everyone.
Harvey finally got out of the car. He noted that the children's bikes were out on top of the lawn. It was Friday night, so he knew Donna would be home and was allowing the children a couple of their friends over for a video game night. He knocked at the door the best he could holding bags of gifts for his children and a couple of very special ones for Donna. As he was looking across the street at the decorations that his neighbors were installing, a whoosh of air was felt as he turned back and he saw Donna standing in the doorway. She was not exactly glad to see him but her body was half turned in that way that she would not prevent him from walking into his own house.
"Here let me take these," Donna said as she grabbed the gifts and hurriedly placed them under the tree.
"You got a tree," Harvey said surprised when really he should not have been.
"Well, I figured since we weren't coming back into the city until after Christmas that I would just get one here," Donna said crossing her hands in front of her awkward in his presence. She knew how she had left things between them a couple of weeks ago and she was now the one who was ashamed.
Suddenly a little red haired tornado ran past Donna and into her father's arms.
"Kenzie my little pumpkin!"
"Dad-dy!" She bulldozed herself at Harvey and he lifted her up with joy and showered her with kisses and a big hug.
"I missed you baby doll," Harvey said to his littlest daughter and rubbed noses with her as Donna watched on and tried not to smile to see the joy light up his face. She did not stop loving him. She never good. It was just hard knowing he was tempted to stray. As someone most wise told her "you always feel a little insecure around the person that means so much to you." Mike was a wise man beyond his years sometimes Donna thought.
As Kenzie pulled at her daddy's hand to take him into her room, Harvey asked over his shoulder where the other two were.
"You'll find them."
