I DO NOT OWN GLEE OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERSIF I DID I'D BE RICH!!!
Can we be a cliche please?
Mercedes' breath was exploding in her lungs as she raced through the corridors of William McKinley High School. Her throat burned and her legs ached but she did not slow down, not even for a second. 'Find Finn! You have to find him!' Kurt had whispered fiercely to her. And Mercedes knew that she could not, would not let him down. Or Rachel down. She continued her frantic search aware that she was close to breaking down into hopeless floods of tears which was so out of character for her.
'Finn! Finn Hudson!' she practically screamed as she desperately searched for the star quarterback captain of the football team. She had stuck her head in every classroom she had passed, had run shrieking through the cafeteria narrowly avoiding being hit with numerous slushies and today's special-macaroni and cheese. For her size Mercedes could duck and weave like a pro-that came from having had plenty of practice avoiding all the stuff the cheerleaders and the jocks threw at her on a daily basis. Okay, no Finn... Right then who else could help her? The answer came to her lightening quick. Puck. Puck would. Now all she had to do was find Puck. Whirling round to retrace her steps she collided with a solid mass and looked up to see Finn Hudson frowning down at her.
'Finn! Thank God!' she felt a lovely kick of relief followed by an even greater one of worry.
'Mercedes? What the hell is going on?' Finn said frowning, not at all pleased to be interrupted from his flirting with a pretty Cheerio. He had just been about to ask Nella or Bella or whatever the hell her name was on a date when he had heard his name being called frantically and had gone to investigate. Finn was on his way back to the top of the popularity pile and if that meant dating vacuous empty headed cheerleaders then so be it and nothing and no one was going to stop him, not even-
'Rachel!' Mercedes managed to get out, grabbing his hand and proceeding to tow him down the corridor at an alarming rate. Finn had not known the girl could move so quickly.
Finn groaned inwardly. Rachel Berry. His own personal version of a natural disaster. The girl who
turned his world upside down with just a look or a smile. The girl who was the definition of unpopular. The girl who when she sang narrowed his whole world to just her. The girl who he had stayed in Glee club for after all the drama of Babygate-he couldn't bear to think of anyone else singing male lead opposite her. The girl who he had practically ignored in the months since she had told him the truth about Quinn and Puck and the baby. It wasn't that he was angry with her; he just couldn't deal with all the emotions that arose from talking to her. Emotions like anger and guilt for the way he had used her and treated her during his time with Quinn and of course the other harder emotions to deal with. Caring, compassion....love. Because what Finn Hudson had come to realise and fight against was that he loved Rachel Berry. He had loved her since joining Glee club. He had loved her whilst he had tried to convince himself it was Quinn he loved. Rachel, with her dreams that were bigger than him, with her gold stars and I'm sorry cookies and short skirts, cute argyle sweaters and the shy smile she always flashed him as they began to sing together. Rachel, who didn't care if she looked like a dork wearing a blue 'TEAM FINN' t-shirt because she was supporting her friend. Rachel, who he knew would completely smash his heart into smithereens when she left him for a life on Broadway. And that was why he could never let his feelings to be known. He had already suffered enough at the hands of Quinn and Puck but that would nothing compared to what he would suffer if he lost Rachel. Finn knew that she had dreams of stardom and getting out of Lima and he had known he couldn't follow her. She was destined for a life better than this. Better that they stay friends-albeit distant ones thanks to the way he had been treating her but at least he would never have to deal with the heartbreak of her leaving him.
He tugged his hand out of Mercedes' death grip and dug his heels in.
'I'm not interested in a Berry drama right now, just tell her I don't want to know.' he told her firmly and turned to go.
'They're going to hurt her!' Mercedes practically screamed at him all her composure lost. He had never seen the girl so completely scared witless.
'What! Who?' Finn cracked the question like a whip. His heart started to thud loudly in his chest reminding him of what he said to Rachel that day in the auditorium 'It's beating real hard,' as she reached out to touch his chest.
'Karofski and the hockey players! They had hold of Kurt but then Rachel came and put herself in front of him! They don't have slushies this time Finn!' Mercedes shook him and he could see the fear written plainly in her eyes 'They have pucks!'
' Let's go!' Finn grabbed her hand and ran with her allowing her to lead him to where she had left Rachel and Kurt underneath the main stairwell surrounded by the hockey team.
'Did Rachel send you to get me?' Finn asked whilst they raced towards their destination.
'GET OUTTA MY WAY!' Mercedes practically howled at an unfortunate cheerio who appeared in their path. Finn felt the stares from his peers and knew that they must make an odd sight-the football captain and the gleek running through the corridors holding hands but he didn't care, He needed to get to Rachel.
'No! Kurt did! He whispered it to me whilst she was mouthing off to them,' she threw over her shoulder.
Finn could hear the commotion up ahead, could see the group of hockey players in a circle presumably surrounding Rachel and Kurt but he couldn't see her.
'Rachel! Rachel!' he shouted skidding to a stop and shouldering his way through the crowd that had built up. There was Rachel in the middle of the hockey players, looking tiny but defiant as she handed Karofski a verbal ass-kicking.
'How dare you! You are nothing but scum. Why don't you pick on someone who will fight back?! Or better yet your own size! You leave him alone! Or so help me I'll beat you bloody!' Her small hands were curled into fists as she shouted at the hockey captain. Rachel could hear Finn shouting her name and she scanned the crowd for him and located him on the outskirts battling his way through desperately trying to reach her. Finn, who she knew blamed her for blowing his world apart. Finn, who could not bear to look at her or utter even two words to her. Finn who hated her or so she thought. Kurt had whispered behind her that he had sent Mercedes to get Finn and she had scoffed inwardly knowing that Finn would never come to defend her and play the white knight to her damsel in distress. But yet here he was and he was shouting at her.
'Rachel, don't say anything! Let me handle this!' Finn called to her urgently. She frowned and continued her verbal assault on Karofski.
'You disgust me! Think you're a man? You're nothing but a kid the way you carry on! Kurt is ten times the man you are. Come any closer and I'll give you what for!'
Finn groaned. She was pissing them off. He pushed and shoved people out of the way.
'Berry, don't make me laugh! Although it might turn me on! You're not bad looking and I'm sure that I can find better uses for your mouth,' Karofski laughed jerking his hips insolently at her.
Finn gritted his teeth and his fists clenched at the comment but kept pushing through the kids that were watching the drama unfolding. He saw Mercedes on the other side frantically trying to reach them.
'Really? I don't think so! As if your pencil dick could fill anything including a mouth!' Rachel said scornfully eyes drifting down to Karofski's crotch area with a look of disgust.
Finn gasped loudly. He had never heard Rachel speak so crudely but inside he was cheering her on.
'Move out the way, Berry.' Karofski growled, drawing his arm back, eyes on Kurt.
'No!' she said firmly, defiantly. Kurt moved behind her and grasped her arms.
'Rachel, move its ok,' he said quietly. Rachel stood firm even as Kurt tried to shove her out of the way.
'No! I'm not moving,' she said her tone laced with an awful finality. 'You're my friend. I don't abandon my friends.'
Panic was licking its way nastily through Finn's veins and try as he might he just could not reach her. He was going to try to deflect Karofski's interest away from her and Kurt.
'Hey Karofski! Why don't you aim that thing at me! Come on are you scared you big homo? Can't handle someone your own size and who's not a girl?' Finn shouted at him taunting him not caring if he took a puck or ten as long as none of them touched her. Karofski ignored him and replied to Rachel.
'Have it your way!' Karofski grinned letting the puck fly straight at her face just as Finn grabbed the collar of his shirt.
Finn watched in helpless horror as the puck connected with Rachel's skull and she crumpled to the ground. He was too late and he saw Kurt and Mercedes kneeling on the floor next to her brushing her hair back from her temples and he saw blood. Karofski seemed frozen, a shocked look of realisation of what he had done.
'I thought she'd move!' he kept repeating to no one in particular.
'Get Mr Schue!' Finn yelled at Brittany who had been standing on the outside of the circle watching in horror. She took off running towards the Spanish room. He shoved Karofski up against the wall and drew his fist back.
'Hudson! Are you crazy?' the other boy managed to gasp before Finn's fist connected with his nose. Finn heard the breaking of bone and relished it. Karofski was going to pay. The last thing Karofski saw before slumping down unconscious was the murder in Finn's eyes.
Finn turned around intent on getting to Rachel when the rest of the hockey team jumped him. Punches and kicks were landing on him everywhere but he didn't care. He had to get to Rachel. Suddenly the hockey players were pulled off him and thrown to the floor. He looked up and saw Puck, Mike and Matt.
'Go,' Puck said 'I've got your back.' A look of understanding passed between the two before Puck turned back to wailing on the hockey team with Mike and Matt. No they weren't friends...but he knew that Puck would always have his back.
Rachel's head was now cradled in Quinn's lap and Quinn's skirt was covered in blood which was running down from a deep cut on her temple and as he knelt down beside her he felt sick.
'I came with Puck. And I saw her. Oh God Finn, so much blood,' Quinn choked out. Finn ignored her, not out of anger or spite but worry for Rachel. Kurt was babbling 'Oh God Rachel this is my entire fault! Please be okay...Please be okay!'
'Rachel? 'He picked up her tiny hand in his large one and ran his thumb over the back of her hand. He looked at Kurt and Mercedes' worried faces and back again at Rachel's now deathly white face.
'Rach? Baby?' he pleaded lifting her up from the floor and Quinn's lap into his arms. He kissed her head gently ironically thinking that this was the first time he had held her in his arms voluntarily and she had to be unconscious. Suddenly the noise and commotion around them stopped and he looked up to see Coach Tanaka and Mr Schuester disbanding the ruckus. Will Schuester came over to Finn and gasped as he saw Rachel unconscious with what appeared to be a nasty gash across her temple and a bruise forming extending into her hairline. He took in the sight of Finn Hudson, one of the most popular kids in school, cradling Rachel Berry, the school's resident freak, in his arms tenderly. Not caring who was watching him kiss her forehead and stroke her hand. Finn met his gaze and he was shocked to see tears glistening in the boy's eyes.
'Finn, what happened? How did she injure herself?' he asked him whilst pulling out his mobile phone to phone for an ambulance.
'The hockey team had a hold of me and were going to puck me out. But Rachel came and put herself in front of me and stood up to them. Karofski threw a puck at her and it hit her. She collapsed after that,' the tearful explanation came from Kurt. Principal Figgins arrived and dragged Karofski and the few members of the hockey team away his face a mask of cold rage.
'I'll phone her parents,' he told Will in a quiet aside before he left.
'Her dads are in New York for their anniversary,' Mercedes told Will worriedly.
'Let's not worry about that now. The main thing is we need to get her to a hospital.'
They waited for fifteen fraught tension-filled minutes and then they heard the sirens. Rachel still had not regained consciousness despite Finn repeatedly calling her name and talking to her. The ambulance crew forced Finn to relinquish his hold although he was extremely reluctant to do so but Will pulled him back. There was room for one more person in the ambulance and Will waged an inner war with himself. There should be an adult in with her. He should go with her. He knew that's what should happen but one look at Finn's face, he knew it would be hard to deny him. Finn would be in no fit state to drive, he reasoned. Better that he get to the hospital safely than risk an accident on the way. And he knew that forbidding Finn or indeed any of the Glee club members to go to the hospital would be to no avail.
'Please, Mr Schue,' Finn begged quietly. Will thought hard and shook his head still undecided.
'Please, I love her,' Finn's voice hitched on the word love. A gentle hand grasped his forearm and he turned to see Emma Pilsbury.
'Let him go with her, Will. We'll be right behind,' she implored him.
'Go on. We'll meet you there,' he nodded to Finn and reached out and squeezed his shoulder. Finn shot a look of gratitude at both of them and hopped in the ambulance. The doors clanged shut and the ambulance sped away.
The waiting room was silent although every member of Glee club was present. Will and Emma had pulled up to the hospital shortly after the ambulance closely followed by Mercedes, Quinn and Puck with Kurt driving.
'What's going on?' Will asked Finn as soon as he saw him in the waiting area.
'I don't know. They wouldn't let me in with her...' Finn's worried brown eyes met his.
'We will wait. She'll be ok, you'll see,' Will tried to reassure him.
Ten minutes later the doors of the waiting area swung open and Brittany, Santana and Matt followed closely by Mike walked in.
'What are you guys doing here?' Quinn asked in surprise. Santana was not one to be very caring of others.
Santana flushed 'We heard. And we wanted to come...'
'What for, to have a good laugh?' Kurt sniped at her.
'No! Because we were worried! Because she's our...friend.' she admitted uncomfortably.
'This is my entire fault.' Kurt said despondently.
'Oh God Kurt, I'm so sorry! I was too late...'Mercedes' voice broke and she covered her face with her hands.
'If it's anyone's fault its mine,' Finn said quietly but firmly. 'All mine. I knew what she was going through. I knew the slushies were raining down on her, I knew the graffiti was pretty graphic, I knew what they were doing to her locker. I just ignored it. Because I was scared. I used popularity as an excuse to hide behind and distance myself from her. It's my fault. If she had been with me this would not have happened.'
'What do you mean?' Quinn asked him and for the first time in months he looked at her, really looked at her and felt nothing. No anger, no resentment, maybe a bit of pity.
'I fucked up. Royally fucked up, Quinn. I used the anger and hurt I felt because of what you and Puck did and I used it to hold her back away from me.' He shook his head in self disgust. 'Finn Hudson, the football and basketball captain...what a coward. From the beginning I knew that what I felt for her was so much more than anything I felt for you. I may not have cheated physically Quinn, but I'm just as guilty as you are. I cheated emotionally. And in a way that is worse. I hurt her time and time again. I played on her feelings for me, I let her down and at the time I told myself I was doing it all for you and the baby. But not really. I was doing it because I couldn't bear to let her go.' He held his head in his hands disconsolately.
'Finn, she'll be ok. And you can tell her then. I tried so hard to destroy what you felt for her. And I lied to you to punish you in a way and because I was scared. And I'm so sorry, more than I can ever say,' Quinn said softly taking his hand in hers.
'You and Puck betrayed me and lied to me. And that hurt. But what is worse than that was that I hurt Rachel. I couldn't stop myself-I wanted her so much and I knew she had feelings for me. And I had you to consider so instead of doing the decent thing and breaking up with you because my heart basically belonged to Rachel, I lied to her, you and myself.' Finn choked back tears that he could feel welling as he thought of what he had done to Rachel.
'The night I told you I loved you I imagined it was Rachel standing in front of me. I was trapped and I was in my own personal hell and I lied to you. I told Rachel that I only wanted her as a friend and nothing could've been further from the truth. And then when I was free of you, I kept pushing her away. '
'But why?' Quinn asked uncomprehendingly 'Why did you push her away? You could've finally got together!'
'Because I knew that her dreams were bigger than me. I knew she was going places and eventually she'd leave me behind. And I didn't think I could handle that. Couldn't survive her leaving me to follow her dreams. I was so, so selfish.' He sighed.
'Yes, you were. But then so was I. And I've learnt from my mistakes. Finn, sometimes the person you fall for is not the one you could ever imagine being with. Just look at me and Puck. Whatever you may think, we genuinely love each other and I tried to deny that by being with you even though I didn't love you. You have to fight for her. Let her decide what her dreams are worth. But be there for her and I swear you won't regret it. Life isn't always easy and sometimes it hurts more than we can stand but it's worth it, she's worth it.' Quinn finished earnestly. Finn was surprised at this new Quinn. Gone were the layers of well bitch and in its place someone who he could see was genuinely sorry for what she had done. Not that he was forgiving her anytime soon but he at least understood her a bit better.
The double doors opened and a doctor stepped through.
'Finn Hudson?' she asked scanning the room.
'Yes, that's me!' Finn leapt up, his palms sweaty almost anticipating bad news. Will and Emma approached the doctor.
'How is she?' Will asked sombrely.
'She's had a very nasty knock and concussion and her memories of the incident are a bit hazy but other than that she's fine.' She told them smiling.
'She's awake?' Finn asked feeling his heart return to its normal beat.
'Yes, and she's asking for you.' The doctor motioned with her head for Finn to follow her. Finn looked at Will questioningly.
Will smiled and nodded 'Go on, she's asking for you. I have to ring her dads back. They're trying to get a flight back to Ohio,'
Finn nodded and turned to follow the doctor.
'Finn,' Will called to him.
'Yes?' he answered turning back.
'Just let her know we're all here ok?' Finn nodded willing his heart to slow its erratic, frantic beating and trying hard to school his features into some semblance of calm.
Finn followed the doctor down a corridor to a room at the end.
'She's in there,' the doctor told him.
'She will be alright won't she? No permanent damage or anything?' he asked her worriedly.
'She'll be fine. Just needs a lot of TLC,' she smiled at him knowingly and he blushed.
'Right, thanks,' he ducked his head and walked into the room.
Rachel laid on the bed, still deathly pale with a bandage over her temple where the gash had been and in a hospital gown which did nothing for the ashen tone of her skin. Her eyes were closed and she looked exhausted but in Finn's opinion never more beautiful.
'Hey Rach,' he whispered taking her hand in his.
Her eyes opened blearily and she focused on him.
'Hey Finn, they said you were here,' she replied with a small chuckle.
'Everybody is...even Santana and Brittany and ...Quinn. Jesus, don't ever do that again!' he told her mock sternly. 'I swear you almost gave me a heart attack never mind the grey hairs I've now got!'
'Your hair looks ok to me,' she said laughing.
'No thanks to you...' he shot back smiling then sobered almost instantly 'Do you realise what could've happened? As it is you got hurt. When are you going to learn not to mess with people, especially ones that are twice your size?' he said grimly.
'Finn, I couldn't just leave Kurt...' she began to defend herself.
'Yes you could. Do you even realise how it felt for me not to be able to get to you in time?'
'I saw you on the outskirts of the crowd. Kurt said he's sent Mercedes to find you but I never thought you'd come...'she trailed off.
'Of course I came! God Rachel! It was you...I'd have walked through fire to get to you!' he told her passionately.
'Finn?' she asked uncertainly then focused on her lap covered by the bed sheet as though it was suddenly very interesting.
'No, Rachel. You need to look at me.' Finn tipped her chin up until her gaze met his and the emotion shining out of his eyes took her breath away. 'I've lied enough.'
'What do you mean muhff-' Finn's hand covered her mouth, silencing her.
'I've lied to Quinn, and myself. But most of all to you. And I'm not proud of it. I made you think that I didn't want you. And I told Quinn I loved her. I told myself that I was doing everything including using you for the baby. And it was all lies. Because the truth was that I always wanted you. I never loved Quinn, and I couldn't bear to let you go. I was so afraid you would find someone else. How couldn't you? You're amazing! And then after you told me about Puck being the father I pushed you away.' He confessed unhappily to her.
'I should never have interfered Finn. It wasn't my place to. I'm so, so sorry,' she whispered painfully her throat tight.
'No! I never blamed you! But I pushed you away because I knew that if you got close you would break my heart. What happened with Quinn would be nothing compared to what I'd feel if we didn't work out.' He assured her stroking her cheek softly.
'What made you even think that I'd break your heart?' she asked him incredulously.
'Rachel, you have these big dreams. Bigger than mine. You're going to go places...and when you do you will break my heart-'he began to explain hesitantly.
'No! You can't use that against me!' Rachel yelled suddenly furious. 'Can't you see? That's all they are! Dreams- just dreams, nothing else! And that's not all I think about! I'm a person, Finn! I have dreams but I also have a life!'
'Rach, you don't understand. I want what's best for you and you're going to be on Broadway one day. You won't need me and I'd only hold you back.' He told her achingly.
'Finn, you have dreams. What are they?' she asked him changing tack completely.
'Nowhere near as grand as yours,' he answered evasively.
'Would being with me ruin them?' she persisted.
'No...Not exactly,' he replied cautiously aware he was on dangerous ground. In fact her being with him would be the culmination of his hopes and dreams.
'What are they!' she pressed reaching out to grasp his hand and he sighed defeated.
'You.' It was one word.
'Me what?' she asked bewildered.
'That's my dream. You. You and me. Always. Wherever we choose to go. You and me and our life together. Your last name being mine and looking at our kids' faces to see a little bit of you and a little bit of me.' He hung his head as he enunciated every word clearly. Rachel was shocked. Finn Hudson, the boy that she loved with all her heart and who she thought would never reciprocate any of her feelings was telling her his big dream was her. She smiled feebly and said 'Okay who are you and what've you done with Finn?'
The joke fell flat and Finn raised his head and the pain that she saw in his gaze was almost too much to bear.
'I pushed you away because I wanted you to live your dream. And I wanted to protect my heart. It was ok to love you and just be friends. I could live with that...but to lose you.' He shook his head unable to go on.
'Finn, Broadway is a dream, that's all. Just one dream out of many that I have. And none of them would be worth losing you over.' He looked at her disbelievingly. 'I would rather not ever get to be a big Broadway star, or achieve fame if it meant that I couldn't have you. I would rather stay here with you in Lima, always, than win any awards.' She grabbed his hand squeezing it tightly.
'You don't mean that...you wouldn't be happy here with me,' he began.
'I certainly wouldn't be happy anywhere without you!' she shot back. She took a deep breath then 'Finn, none of those dreams would have any meaning if you weren't there with me. I love you so much. Why can't you see that? I once told you that my dreams were bigger than you. I lied. My most important dream is you. I don't care if we end up in New York on Broadway or if we end up here. As long as you're with me.'
Finn wrapped his arms around her tiny frame.
'God I love you, Rach. And if you give me a chance, I swear I won't let you down. You'd better know what you're doing because I'm not letting you go. Ever.' He kissed her gently his lips slowly massaging hers.
'Mmmm, good. I'm not planning on going anywhere. Ever.' She replied just before his tongue slipped inside her mouth mating with hers, dominating her marking her as his. Her hand covered his heart and grasped his sweater lightly.
'It's beating real hard,' he told her smiling as he had in the auditorium what seemed like a lifetime ago.
'You can kiss me if you want to,' she echoed her own words now.
'I want to,' he leaned in for another kiss and this time wound his arms around her, determined not to let go. ' I love you, Rachel,'
'That's not how it goes,' she teased, her lips slightly raised up off his.
'Oh I think we should start a new tradition,' he laughed at her.
'Ok well then I love you too.' He captured he lips firmly kissing her as if his life depended on it before pulling back and saying
'Are we now a cliché? I know what it means-I looked it up!' he gave her a crooked smile.
Rachel smiled at him before running her fingers through his hair and said 'Let's see-the two young and don't forget talented leads falling in love? You know what, I do believe we are Finn.'
He smiled at her; his eyes filled with real joy and muttered just before he kissed her again 'I was hoping you'd say that!'
THE END
