A/N: so... this is something new. Inspired by KricketWilliams, who said that I can write both - angst and team interactions - something I always thought I am totally going to suck at. This is the end result. This is pretty, pretty angsty for a while until it gets all better.
Of all the times they could have asked her to go with them, this was probably the worst. Of all the places the team had ever gone to this topped the list as 'most inconvenient'.
When Hotch came to her that morning, telling her they would need her to go with them this time, Penelope was first of all excited about the prospect. She didn't leave her lair often enough and liked field trips with the team. Just seconds later however that joy and excitement was overshadowed by doubt and anger.
"Where are we heading to?" she asked.
"Alaska," came as an answer from Hotch and with that he left.
Penelope had to swallow a few times at the prospects ahead. Alaska. With Derek Morgan. Could it get any worse?
She hadn't really talked to him for a few weeks now. Of course they had their chitchat over the phone whenever he called in regards of information in a case, but it always remained at that. She had cut off all flirting, all lightness and anything else that would give him any feeling of the phone call being anything else but business.
At the beginning she noticed that he had tried to ask about what was going on with her but when he didn't succeed in getting any answers out of her he had become cranky, followed by her receiving less and less phone calls from him, and more and more calls from the rest of the team in regards to getting information during cases.
She had managed to keep him at distance now for a good four weeks, succeeding in avoiding him, but still holding up the professionalism. Until now. When she had to go to Alaska. With him in tow.
Penelope let out a silent groan and let her head fall forwards to hit her desk, letting out a frustrated sigh asshe realized there was nothing to do but get through this the best she could. It wouldn't be easy though.
This is what she got for always asking to travel with the team more.
The plane ride was anything but fun, with her sitting on end of the plane and him on the other. She had watched a few times how he moved, looked like he was coming towards her, probably a last attempt on finding out what her problem had been lately. But he always decided last minute against it. She figured with them being on a plane, where everyone around could hear them he decided there were better places to have this conversation.
She heard the team briefing. About the guy and his victims. Heard theories being thrown into the room and being discussed and dismissed. She was had been with them by now on enough cases to know they were not expecting her input in any of this. Her function was more to give them the support they desperately needed on location. She listened to what they knew about the victims, what had happened to them and possible Unsubs. Hearing the gory details of the crimes they were investigating was always her least favorite part of her job. It was already enough for her to see pictures of the crimes, but having to hear explicit details?
It was almost more than she could bear sometimes.
Arriving at the station, it became clear to Penelope rather soon that Hotch hadn't asked her to come with them due to equipment issues. They had a state of the art equipment and people probably at least as good as her to work with it. Not that she would ever admit that there were people who were at least as good as her.
"Um … sir, not that I'm not … um grateful for the opportunity to come with you, but what exactly are you expecting from me? Since the people here seem to have it under control… and do a pretty good job."
Aaron Hotchner turned around, looking at his technical analyst with a quizzical expression all over his face. He stood there for a moment, not saying anything, just looking at Penelope, which made her slightly nervous.
"Actually, I didn't ask you to come with us because of the technical equipment or support on these, but because we might need your expertise on site," he explained to her finally.
"You need me … in the field?" she asked, swallowing slightly. She never really been in the field before. Never been on a crime scene. She had always been in safety, a phone call away, behind her screens in her lair back at Quantico. Where she didn't need to see real blood, real and alive witnesses and victims or crime scenes and the dead bodies that were at them.
She had always been kept away from the actual field work and Penelope Garcia definitely had no intention of changing that anytime soon.
"You have any problems with that?" Hotchner asked her, and Penelope wasn't sure whether she heard worry in his voice.
She answered quickly. "Sir, it's just that I have never really been … um …on a scene, so to speak," she continued nervously.
"No worry, I'll send Morgan with you."
Those words were probably worse than the thought of being at a crime scene itself.
Although she wouldn't have thought so this morning she had to admit now that there had been a way this whole situation could get worse. And it had just happened.
