A/N: Okay, so, this is my first story ever. I have read numerous LotR works and finally decided to try my hand at some. Reviews are greatly appreciated, I need all the advice I can get. Enjoy!
How do you react when something like this happens? Do you pretend it was a dream? Do you deny it?
I can not. It is all too real. I knew it would happen one day. I knew he would leave me.
I've lost ones close to me before. I have learned to let go, but how does one do the same when you lose your best friend- nay, your brother? How can one let go when a part of you stays behind, lost forever?
The cry of a gull breaks through my thoughts. I will resist no longer the call of the sea, perhaps I will find healing on the other side. I will finally see many of those that have been lost.
But not the one that matters the most. I will see you again, he told me, at the breaking of this world.
Estel. How aptly named. Even in death he still kept hope, still tried to reassure me that everything would be okay. A single tear slides down my face.
"Why?" I whisper.
Someone lays a hand on my shoulder, and I flinch. I had forgotten there was another beside me. I had forgotten that I was not alone in my grief. I turn and look Elrond in the eyes, eyes that are glittering with unshed tears. I lower my gaze and ask again. "Why did he leave? He still had a destiny ahead of him. How could he have died?"
"I know not. The Valar must have their reasons, yet I shall never understand them." After a moment elrond seems to collect his thoughts and continues, "Perhaps if the elves had fought on the Pelennor we could have prevented this. Perhaps I could have saved him had I been there."
I know this is not true. Not even Elrond could not have healed his wound. I saw Halbarad fall, saw the standard of the Evenstar hit the ground, watched as Aragorn felled orc after orc to clear a pathway to his kinsman… screamed as Elessar, the future king of Gondor, was run through with an orc's scimitar. I can vividly recall how I started running to him, my arrows spent, when Halbarad died. I remember my heart nearly stopping as the orc impaled Estel. I was too late.
The presence of someone behind me breaks me out of my memories. Elrond is back, though I did not know he'd ever left. Behind him stand his children. Elladan and Elrohir, the cheerful twins I had known, are now reduced to the empty shells they created for themselves when the Lady Celebrian left. Their Hope is gone. The one who taught them how to love again is dead. Behind them stands Arwen. Words cannot express the absolute despair and grief written on her elegant features. The Evenstar is fading.
Reluctant to break the silence, I turn and set off down the path to the pier. It seems as if the day is too cheerful. As if this great tragedy was all a dream. The cloudless sky is a soft blue, a gentle breeze disturbs the trees, and a flock of seagulls glides overhead. At least my last memory of the land I have called home will be beautiful. Middle-earth is saved, but at a terrible cost.
As I reach the quayside, I notice that Lord Círdan is waiting for us. His face is tinged with sadness, though at our passing or Aragorn's, I do not know. Silently, Elrond steps onto the ship and I start to follow. I hesitate for a moment before my foot touches the deck. Maybe I should not sail, perhaps… no. The call of the sea is too strong now. Besides, I do not really want stay in the land that holds so many painful memories.
The Children of Elrond follow me onto the ship, and I turn to face Círdan. "Farewell, min govannon- ad- haer i gaer," he addresses us.
"Haer i gaer," I echo as our ship slowly drifts away from the harbor. Away from my home. Away from reminders.
The pain of his passing, nay, not just his passing, his death, will linger until the breaking of this world. However, I will await that day with open arms, I will await him with open arms. Despair shall not consume me. I turn to face the opening of the bay, and the sun slowly makes its way down the sky. I will still hold on to Hope.
