A/N: Not that heavy on the Dramione interaction since this will be a story told mainly from the point of view of onlookers. You can still leave if that isn't your thing. :))
PS (JUL. 21,2014) Minor grammar and spacing corrections.
Chapter One: The Big Discovery
Pansy Parkinson stepped off from the fireplace and brushed off the non-existent soot from her soot-repellent robes. They cost a fortune but she believed in investments. And ensuring that she looked far superior from any Gryffindor was an investment in her eyes. She surveyed the motley crew that has gathered in Grimmauld Place's living room while she was far too busy being fashionably late.
Ron Weasley was sitting in one of the loveseats with Daphne Greengrass on his lap.
The younger Greengrass, Astoria, was ensconced between her twin lovers, Fred and George Weasely, who were alternating between tickling her and feeding her grapes. With their mouths.
Blaise Zabini was snogging the girl Weasley under the mistletoe. Nevermind that it's in the middle of July and they had to conjure a mistletoe for the lewd purposes.
Vincent Crabbe was holding Luna Lovegood's hand as she told him stories about her close encounters with the Crumple-Horned Snorkack.
And Gregory Goyle was kneeling in front of a very pregnant Lavender Goyle nee Brown as he massaged her swollen ankles.
"Late again, Parkinson?" A soft voice whispered in her ear as an arm wrapped around her waist.
"Stop doing that, Potter," Pansy sniffed, "or I might get the idea that you're missing me too much."
"And why is missing my fiancée too much a bad thing again?"
"Oh, I don't know," she said as she turned to face him. "Care to show me how much you missed me again?"
Harry moved his head closer to hers. "More than you can tell, Parkinson."
Pansy angled her head, lips inching closer to Harry's when a gold throw pillow hit them at the side of their faces.
"Get a room, Potter!" Smirked Blaise. Pansy scoffed but untangled herself from her fiancé's arms anyway.
"You're the one to talk, Zabini. Done playing tonsil Quidditch?"
"Oh yes, and what a talented Chaser Ginny is, I must say."
"Ew, gross." Daphne muttered under her breath. "I do not have to subject myself to the torture of hearing the torrid details of your love lives, thank you very much."
"Why, Daphne, if you keep on acting like that, I'd have to conclude that you're just being jealous. Weasley not much of a lover? I didn't mean you, darling." Blaise added, pecking his girlfriend on the cheek.
Ron's face reddened. "Shut up, Zabini. I'll have you know that Daphne and I spent the whole weekend at our flat and we did nothing but – mmph." He was silenced by the hand the Slytherin girl placed firmly on his mouth.
"There is such a thing as too much information, Ronald. Oh, honestly. Boys." Daphne then turned to her sister who was still busy playing with Fred's hair as George played with hers. "You better have a good explanation calling us out here, Astoria."
Astoria seemed to be knocked back to the real world as she quickly stood up and straightened her robes. "Oh, yes! Well you see, we, that is, Fred, George, and I, have noticed something about Draco and Granger."
Everyone's curiosity was piqued. After the war, prejudices were shattered. A muggle-born holding hands with a pureblood was now widely acceptable even in the most elite pureblood circles. The words blood traitor and mudblood held no more meaning other than obsolete terms. A new peace was achieved, and testament to this was the most unlikely of relationships blooming left and right.
The only exception to this was Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy. They saw each other quite regularly. The Goyle-Brown wedding. The Potter-Parkinson engagement party. The Zabini monthly galas. Sunday morning brunch at the Weasleys. Not to mention they both work together at the Ministry. Both as Aurors. With each other as a partner. With this kind of interaction on an almost daily basis, one could only wonder why the top students of their batch in Hogwarts have yet to find a balance to co-exist peacefully. Merlin knows they get along with other people they hated just as much in school. Draco has even received a Weasely sweater in Slytherin green last Christmas that he wears at the Auror office on extremely chilly days. So why the special hate for each other?
"What did you notice, Astoria?" Lavender asked.
"Well, last Monday, I went to the Auror office to deliver the report on the Department of Mysteries break-in to Harry." Harry was Head Auror and Astoria was an Unspeakable. "But then I heard shouting coming from Draco and Granger's office. The door opened and Hermione suddenly stormed out, Draco, hot on her heels. She threatened to hex him and left after that."
That sounded like a typical Draco Hermione argument. Everyone looked at Astoria, wondering if that's all that they were summoned for.
"I was Draco's intended." The girl continued. "I've been with him for a few years before finding true love," she grinned at her lovers, "so I'm pretty sure I know his emotions. I couldn't be wrong with what I saw with his eyes that day. It was a flash, but watching her stalk away from him, I could swear that Draco's eyes darkened and he looked at Granger with something akin to desire."
Everybody stared at the girl, processing this new bit of information. It was Ginny who spoke first.
"Are you implying what I think you're implying?"
"If you think I'm implying that Draco is head-over-heels for Granger, then yes."
"B-but, that's preposterous!" Ron exclaimed.
"No it isn't." Crabbe said softly. "Goyle and I have always wondered why Draco kept a picture of Granger under his pillow for years."
All eyes were now on Crabbe and Goyle. All aforementioned eyes were threatening to pop out of their sockets.
"Malfoy kept a picture of Hermione under his pillow?" Harry said, shocked.
"For four years." Goyle confirmed. "Well, not really sure about that, but Crabbe and I found the picture in third year."
"Then, the day before graduation, we found it again stashed between Draco's books." Crabbe added.
"We asked him about it. He turned red. First time I saw Draco not ghostly pale. Then he snatched it back and muttered something about voodoo."
"And you accepted that lame excuse?" Blaise intoned monotonously.
"Maybe the wrackspurts are messing with your brain." Luna said dreamily.
Goyle's face scrunched up. "How is that a lame excuse?"
"Well, how about the fact that we're actual magical people who don't need voodoo rubbish to curse anyone?" Lavender sighed grumpily.
"Sorry, Lav." Goyle muttered.
"It's okay, Greg." The witch smiled. They looked at each other adoringly, much to the chagrin of the onlookers.
Blaise cleared his throat. "Ahem, now back to the matter at hand. Draco fancies Granger. So what?"
"Tut, tut, I would have expected better from you, Zabini." George said. "Now that we know Albino Ferret fancies Swotty Bookworm, we can now act on the pretense of being good friends to set them up!"
"Excuse me?" Ron said, "I thought I heard you say we're setting Malfoy and Hermione up."
"My little brother, always keen with ear hygiene he is." Fred said in mock pride. "You heard right, Ronnie."
"Preposterous!" Ron exclaimed.
"You might want to teach your boyfriend new vocabulary, Daphne. He seems to be overusing that word lately."
"Listen, everyone," Harry spoke, in an attempt to be the voice of reason, "it might be that Malfoy likes Hermione, but to set them up because of that is a tad bit unfair. Hermione can't stand him!"
"Au contraire, Mr. Potter." George smirked.
"What do you mean?"
"You see, Harry, the other day, Hermione dropped by the shop to stack up on Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder. Said it was useful for covert operations."
Harry nodded. They did use the powder occasionally in the field.
"So being the good friends that we are, we dropped whatever we were doing to assist her." Said Fred.
"Never mind that we were in the middle of brewing a very important potion and the shop was closed for the day and she didn't even bother looking at the CLOSED sign." Added George.
"And then she said, tell them what Miss Granger said, Georgie."
" 'Did Malfoy drop by?'" George said in an unnaturally high-pitched voice that was a poor imitation of Hermione.
"Despite our quick wits, we were confused," George continued in his normal voice, "we were about to ask why, when suddenly she said, do continue Freddy."
" 'Because it awfully smells like his pungent cologne here.'" Fred said in an impression no better than his twin's.
"But the thing is, Malfoy didn't come into the shop all day at all! Heck, the shop was closed for the day on account of us brewing our very important potion."
"I fail to see where you're going with this." Pansy intoned.
"Well, future-Mrs-Potter, it's because you wouldn't let us finish." George heaved a dramatic sigh. "Are you ready for this? Because this is the best part."
"George and I were brewing Amortentia that day. And Hermione Granger was standing by the fumes." Everyone gasped. Amortentia was the most potent love potion known to wizard-kind. Everyone knows that the scent you smell in the potion is the one you're deeply attracted to.
"Whatever did you guys needed Amortentia for?" Lavender asked.
"Experiments for our new love potion line." George shrugged dismissively. "Anyway, the girl was so much in a hurry, she didn't even notice the mother-of-pearl liquid bubbling right beside her."
"Yet she never failed to complain on the 'pungent'" Fred made air quotations with his fingers as he said the word pungent, "aroma of Draco Malfoy's cologne."
"I don't think that's enough proof of attraction." Harry told them. "I mean, it's not like no other bloke in the world uses that cologne other than Malfoy."
"No, Harry." Pansy said quietly. "Malfoy's cologne is a custom-made original by the most famous wizard perfume-maker in France. It costs a hundred galleons a bottle and he's been using it since sixth year. No other wizard in the world uses that cologne and on the off chance that someone else does use it, it would react in a different way to their body and produce a completely different scent."
"I didn't realize that Draco was that vain." Luna said.
"Oh, you haven't seen him talk to himself in front of a mirror yet." Blaise snorted.
"So you're saying Hermione is attracted to Malfoy?" Ginny asked her twin brothers to which they responded with an enthusiastic nod.
"Preposterous." Ron muttered.
"And there he goes again," Fred said as he rolled his eyes. "Listen, it's easy to see. I mean, once you know that they fancy each other, suddenly the omnipresent tense atmosphere makes a lot more sense."
"Sexual tension?"
"Hit the nail on the head, Potter!" George grinned.
"And you're telling us this, why?" Pansy drawled.
"So we can set them up, of course!"
"Why should we do that again?" Daphne asked as she raised her perfectly shaped brow.
Fred looked at his brother's girlfriend like she'd grown a second head. "Aren't you people tired of them bickering and shooting each other death glares at every social occasion?" A murmur of assent rippled across the room.
"I do want a peaceful wedding with no worries of one of my bridesmaids hexing one of the groomsmen." Pansy said thoughtfully.
"It's settled then! Operation Set-up Swotty Bookworm and Albino Ferret is underway! Any ideas?"
"I think I got one." Harry said with a mischievous smirk, reminiscent of his Hogwarts days.