A/N: Well, readers, enjoy the longest Christmas one shot ever! It's EXTREMELY non-cannon for all the series included, but its okay cause it's fun! :P Happy holidays to everybody!
Chapter One
It was almost bedtime. For Tony Tony Chopper, bedtime usually meant taking off his hat and curling up with his pillow for another night of peaceful sleep, listening to the soothing sound of the waves knocking against the Sunny's hull and trying to ignore Luffy's snoring. But tonight would be different. Tonight would be a special bedtime, because it was Christmas Eve. And that meant one very special thing: Santa.
He was restless as the sun began to set. Their Christmas dinner, which Sanji had spent three whole days preparing in secret, was looking to be delicious. But he couldn't focus, not even on the enticing smell of cotton candy wafting from the kitchen. Watching the waves go by all afternoon over the Sunny's prow, he worried. Helping Usopp wrap presents for the crew, he worried. Aiding Luffy in a scam to try and get into the kitchen, he worried. And that night, as the sun began to color the horizon a peachy-purple and Nami and Robin enlisted his help to set the table, Chopper worried.
The whole crew was bouncing with excitement, Nami and Robin especially. The girls took particular pride in making sure the whole ship, especially the dining room, was glittering, decked in gold ribbons and with wreaths of tangerine branches and candles scattered around. It was the only time of year Nami let them take out the good silverware, and Robin enlisted a veritable army of her clones to help her clean every surface of the ship, to make it sparkling and perfect for the party that night.
But to Chopper, even as he helped Zoro fold and decorate nametags for the crew and all the guests they were expecting, none of it seemed magical. Because he was worried.
"What's on your mind, Ototo-chan?" Zoro finally asked.
Chopper looked up, and even through his worry couldn't help laughing. Zoro was covered in gold sparkles, bits of paper, and stickers that looked like Christmas trees and snowmen. "Oni-chan," he said, "does Santa have a Log Pose on his sleigh?"
Zoro shouted, pressing his hand to his eye as glue shot out the nib of the bottle he'd been squeezing and hit him directly in the face. "Well…" he said, struggling to keep his voice from shaking, "I don't know, Chopper. I don't think so. Log Poses are only for ships." The big man wiped the glue from his eye with a hand full of glitter, leaving his face completely coated in gold and blue. "Hey, what's wrong?"
Chopper tilted his head, sticking a big yellow star on Luffy's nametag. "I'm worried, Oni-chan. What if Santa can't find us! Or what if he forgets my presents, or yours, or Luffy's! Or what if his reindeer are scared of water and they can't fly over the ocean and so he can't bring presents to any of the pirates on the Grand Line! It would be terrible! I should write him a note, or we should light a fire so he can find us or something! Oni, what if—"
"Hey, hey, slow down there, Turbo!" Zoro said, securing a pink ornament sticker to Chopper's quivering blue nose. It made him squeak, and he rubbed his nose fiercely. Zoro laughed. "Santa's…uh, well he's magic, he won't forget you!"
Chopper tilted his head, writing Robin's name in big, blockish letters on his nametag. His eyes were huge and full of wonder as he looked up at Zoro. "You mean no matter where I go, he'll always find me?"
Zoro nodded uneasily. "Well, that is, unless you, you know, aren't good enough or something. Then he won't come at all."
Chopper's eyes widened and filled with big tears. "What?!" he dropped Robin's nametag straight into a pile of green sparkles. "You mean I could scare him away?! Oni, we've done so much fighting this year, and I said some bad words, and there was the time I snuck into the kitchen when I wasn't supposed to because I was hungry, what if Santa doesn't come?"
"No, no, no that's not what I meant!" Zoro threw his hands up, spraying sequins and bits of paper all over the deck. "I mean, uh…it'll be fine! No one on our whole crew drinks and fights and swears less than you!"
"That's not exactly saying much," Franky said as he walked by carrying a huge barrel of eggnog over one shoulder.
Chopper's frantic gaze flicked between Franky and Zoro, the latter of whom was dramatically miming the former's strangulation. Catching on, Franky put the barrel of eggnog down and placed a big hand on Chopper's head.
"Don't listen to me, Chopper," he said, smiling falsely. "You've been more than good enough to get presents, don't worry. The rest of us are terrible people, but you'll be fine!"
"YOU'RE NOT GOING TO GET PRESENTS?!" Chopper screamed. "None of you?!"
"Smooth move," Zoro muttered. "Well, I mean, Santa only comes to really good people Chopper, and pirates aren't usually good people."
Chopper stared in horrified silence. Zoro stood after a tense moment, showering glitter and tinsel from his lap as he did. "You know what, Chopper, I'd better help Franky finish carrying food to the kitchen. If you have any more questions go ask—" he scanned frantically around, "Luffy!" he said, making a hasty retreat from the confused and glitter-coated reindeer.
For another hour Chopper sat on deck making nametags for the crew and the guests they were expecting for dinner that night. Zoro's words, and then Franky's, had confused him. Why wouldn't Santa visit my nakama, they're the most kind and noble and wonderful people I know! Pirates aren't really bad, are they?
Chapter Two
"Luffy, so help me god I will give you a haircut or die trying!"
"No!" Luffy shouted, bucking against the thick ropes Nami had used to tie him to a dining room chair.
"Sit still or I'll chop your big, rubbery ears off, too!" she said, brandishing scissors and struggling to get a hold on Luffy's hair.
"You'll never take me alive!" Luffy cried, struggling so hard that he fell forward, his chair landing on top of him. Seeing her opportunity, Nami jumped on him, snipping the ends off his long black hair.
"This is for your own good, Luffy," Robin said quietly, looking up from her job of folding napkins into intricate shapes. "Your hair was getting so long it looked like it would develop a consciousness of its own soon."
Luffy's mouth dropped open. "Do you have any idea how awesome that would be?! Nami, no! I won't let you kill my hair monster!" he scrunched his face up, concentration nearly popping his eyes from their sockets. "Grow, LIVE, DAMN YOU!" he shouted to his hair. It flopped lifeless against his forehead, and Nami trimmed it, strands falling into Luffy's eyes.
"How long do you think we could keep him believing that?" Nami asked sardonically.
Robin shrugged. "We'd better not tell him about the elves that grow on your skin if you don't take baths," she said with a quiet smile.
Luffy jumped up so hard he flipped the chair, sending Nami sprawling to the floor and breaking all the ropes binding him. "Elves? On my skin? Ha, ha, I'm never taking another bath in my life!" His hair halfway cut, he ran jovially towards the deck, shouting for Brook.
"Luffy, you get back here now!" Nami called, standing and brandishing the scissors as she chased her wild captain onto the deck.
"Don't bother Brook, he's working on his composition for tonight!" Robin shouted after her crew.
Sighing, enveloped in the peace of a moment alone, Robin finished the final piece of complex origami she had folded the napkins into, a swan, for Nami's place. The spread of them was incredible, all perfectly gold and pressed to wrinkle-less perfection, now folded into the shapes of animals, flowers, ships, and dolls. Christmas was Robin's favorite time of year, the most wonderful and warm time, when even her crew seemed unable to destroy a certain comfort and mellow warmth in the air around them.
"Umm, Robin?"
Chopper's small, concerned voice startled Robin from her pensive reverie. "Oh, hello doctor-san. From the looks of you, you've had fun making everyone's nametags?"
She only noticed the tears in Chopper's eyes as he ran towards her, burying his antlered head against her knee.
"Chopper," she asked, her instinct to comfort and mother the small, delicate creature overwhelming, "what happened? What's the matter?"
"Robin," he asked as she took him into her lap, "does Santa visit pirates?"
She pulled the little reindeer close. His fur smelled like cookies and soap, glitter and glue making parts of it stick out at odd angles. "Of course Santa visits pirates! Who on earth told you he didn't?"
Chopper pulled away, wiping his eye. "Well Zoro said he doesn't have a log pose on his sleigh so I don't know how he could find us, and then Franky said pirates weren't good people so Santa wouldn't come even if he could find us!"
Robin made a sympathetic face, smiling a little. Across the ship, Franky and Zoro each found themselves punched in the face by arms that appeared out of nowhere. "Doctor-san, when's the last time swordsman-san knew anything about going in the right direction? And shipwright-san? You know the sort of nonsense that comes out of his mouth." Robin tilted the doctor's chin to look up at her. "You are the kindest, gentlest, most inspiring little reindeer I've ever met. Don't you even think for a second that Santa won't visit you tonight! Why he'll probably make a second trip to give you more presents! You know his sleigh is pulled by reindeer, don't you?"
Chopper's eyes widened. "Really? Reindeer that can fly?"
Robin nodded. "They're magic reindeer, from the farthest place in North Blue. And you know what? The leader, named Rudolph, he has a red nose. And when he was young, all the other reindeer would make fun of him because it was a strange color. But Rudolph showed them all they were wrong! His nose has very special powers that allow him to see through fog and darkness, and now he's the leader of Santa's sleigh!"
"So he's just like me?!" Chopper asked, taking Robin's hands in his hooves and bouncing up and down.
"Oh yes! Because you have a magic nose, too, doctor-san! Only yours is blue so it's for healing, not for seeing in the dark."
Chopper pressed his hooves to his nose, struggling to keep back a smile. "Do you think Santa knows there's a reindeer on the Sunny?" he asked.
Robin nodded. "Santa knows everything in the world! He'll come tonight while you're sleeping and I bet he'll bring you even more presents because you're related to his reindeer!"
Robin's heart melted as Chopper's smile added light and warmth to the room around them. He bounced up and down excitedly, jumping from her lap. "Oh, I hope so! I hope he brings presents for everybody! I'm going to go to bed right now, so that he'll come early! Goodnight, Robin!"
"Doctor-san, wait," Robin said with a laugh. "You can't go to bed yet, we have guests coming tonight, and I'm sure they'd be sad if they couldn't see you!"
Chopper spun on one hoof, skipping in a little circle. "Oh, of course! Robin, do you think Santa will come to the party? I should go make him a nametag, just in case he does!" Without a word, Chopper sprinted from the room, nearly tripping over his feet he was so excited.
Robin looked down at the napkins she'd so carefully folded. That would be a Christmas present he'd never forget. She stood, surveying her handiwork again before ascending the stairs to the deck. She disregarded Luffy, who had climbed the mast and was clinging to it for all he was worth while Nami shouted at him from below, shooting blasts from her Clima-Tact to try and dislodge him. Dodging a heat ball and ducking deftly under Franky's arm as he hurried to the kitchen with a heavy barrel, she opened the door to the men's room and called for Usopp. I'll get Santa to this party for you, Doctor-san, don't worry for a moment.
Chapter Three
The Straw Hats stood in a line, each dressed in their best, awaiting examination. Nami paced up and down the line, looking each of her nakama up and down. Usopp had managed to comb his hair and, though he'd protested wildly, had slicked it back like the rest of the men. The shirt Nami and Robin had mended and laundered for him that afternoon fit him well, and Usopp had tucked it in more neatly than expected. Zoro, tall and handsome as ever, gave Nami a wink that made her blush as she passed by him. His black tie and jacket were impeccable, without blemish. Luffy, hair now trimmed, stood as though awaiting execution, his hat perched so exactly on the center of his head it was as though he'd spent hours perfecting it. Though he wore a dress shirt, neither Nami nor the rest of the crew had been able to discourage him from wearing his red vest over it. Nami shook her head, moving on. Robin, neatly dressed as ever, gave her a smile as she passed. Courtesy of Sanji, each of the girls had received a lovely—if a bit short—dress as an early Christmas present before the party that night. Robin's was red and Nami's green, each sleeveless and edged with black lace at the bodice and hem. The chef himself was dressed to the nines, his casual purple suit discarded in place of a tuxedo. Sanji's Christmas feasts were legend, and he wanted all the credit and attention possible for the three days he had slaved on the meal. Franky had polished his odd metal nose and for once agreed to put on pants, though he looked remarkably uncomfortable and Nami was sure his usual speedo lurked under the black fabric. Brook towered over her, his hair combed into some semblance of neatness and his violin already tucked under his arm. He gave Nami a little bow as she passed. Chopper was last in line, his eyes shining, nearly bouncing with excitement as he looked up at Nami. Someone had hung little ornaments in his antlers and tied a string of jingle bells to the brim of his hat. He had clearly been unaided in his quest to knot a bowtie, and it hung limp and awkward around his neck. Nami bent to tie it, straightening the lapels of Chopper's dark blue jacket as she did. Her inspection finished, she nodded.
"You all pass."
Luffy collapsed onto the deck with relief and Usopp let out a breath that he looked to have been holding for five minutes. All of them burst into excited chatter, Zoro running from his place in line to pick Nami up and swing her in a circle.
"You look absolutely gorgeous," he said, putting her down with a kiss on the cheek.
Nami slapped him playfully. "I'd say the same for you, except for that black eye you're sporting. What happened, you and Franky have an accident moving barrels into the kitchen? He's got one to match!"
The two men exchanged glances and then looked at Robin, who smiled at them and raised her eyebrows. She shrugged casually, turning to speak to Brook. "Uh, yeah, something like that," Zoro said.
"NAKAMA!" Sanji shouted, his voice carrying out across the ocean and echoing around the ship. He stood on one of the long tables laid out on deck, holding a ladle in his hand and gesturing along the line of the crew. They all went silent, staring up at him. "Tonight is Christmas Eve and as many of you know, I have spent days preparing tonight's dinner. I have chosen to codename it FOE P, for Feast Of Epic Proportions. Each of you," here he paused, sweeping the ladle across the line of his crew, "has been given an assignment to help with the setup of FOE P to perfection. That may or may not include serving, cleaning up, laying food out, restocking plates, replacing barrels of eggnog, wine, and beer when they are empty, or keeping the guests from drinking too much. But your task will most definitely NOT be the eating of FOE P before dinnertime. Is that clear, Luffy!" Sanji swung around to face the captain, gesturing with such force that the ladle flew from his hand and struck the captain in the forehead, sending him sprawling to the deck.
"Yes, Sanji!" he said fearfully.
"Repeat!" Sanji shouted.
"There will be no eating of FOE P before dinnertime!" Luffy barked, jumping to his feet and offering Sanji a salute. The ladle stuck from his forehead, its handle tipping the brim of his hat off center.
"Exactly! Now, we are expecting some very special guests this evening and I will not under any circumstances allow anyone's over-excitement or stupidity to ruin the eating of FOE P. All fighting is to be done away from midships, all drinking is to be kept under control, and no one may swear in the presence of the dishes, lest they be curdled by your vile pirate tongues!" His eyes landed on Zoro. "And marimo, you are not to let your eyes wander for one second from the kitchen. Dessert is a surprise, and I expect you to guard it with your life."
Zoro nodded in earnest. "I understand."
"You alone have been granted the privilege of seeing the masterpiece, and should anyone else," his eyes landed on Luffy again, nearly searing holes in the captain's shirt with their power, "see it before it is ready, the surprise will be ruined and I will kill you with this ladle!" He brandished an empty hand, looking at it in surprise. Luffy scuttled forward to hand Sanji the ladle he'd extracted from his forehead. Sanji nodded and Zoro smiled. "Now, nakama, to arms! We have exactly twenty-two minutes until our guests arrive! And when they do everything had better be absolutely perfect!"
At Sanji's signal each member of the Straw Hats bolted to their assigned position, the ship buzzing with excitement as they made ready for Christmas Eve dinner. Sanji rushed forward and knelt, grabbing Chopper by the shoulder before he could run off to his duty of setting out silverware, napkins, and nametags.
"Hold on a second," Sanji said kindly, smiling at the reindeer. "You've gotten us out of some pretty sticky situations this year, Chopper, so I want to give you something in return. I know it's not Christmas yet, but it's something special and I want you to have it now."
Sanji fished in his pocket and produced a tiny glass box, no bigger than his thumb. It was perfectly square, and inside was a miniscule shape spun of delicate blue cotton candy. Chopper held it up to the light, watching it refract like crystal as the cotton candy caught illumination from the setting sun. He smiled. It was the Straw Hats' jolly roger, with little antlers and a bright blue nose. "Wow, it's beautiful!" he said, giving Sanji a hug.
"Well, our crew wouldn't even be here without you. I know marimo and I would have killed each other at least three times if your bandages and medicine hadn't been there to save us. Now that," he tapped the glass box, "is very special cotton candy. It's the kind I used to eat when I was a kid, in East Blue. I've had enough special sugar to make one batch ever since I left home, and that's part of it. If you're ever feeling especially sad then eat it and you'll feel better. But it's special, Chopper, so I hope you keep it safe."
Chopper saw the sheen of tears in Sanji's eyes. "You didn't use all your special sugar, did you?" he asked.
Sanji shook his head. "No, but what I did use was more than worth it. Thank you for everything, Chopper." The man smiled, lighting a cigarette. "Now hurry up! I expect nothing short of gorgeousness from those nametags you made this afternoon!"
Chopper jumped and scurried off, calling another thank you as he ran to fetch the nametags. He smiled down at the little jolly roger that stared up at him, tucking it into the pocket of his jacket.
As soon as he was below deck, all action suddenly stopped. Without a word the straw hats gathered around Robin, who gestured for silence. "You all remember the plan, right? We have to make sure Chopper doesn't see Whitebeard, or the whole surprise will be ruined. Swordsman-san, it's your job to tackle him into the living room before he gets on deck, we'll leave the window open for you."
Zoro smiled broadly, flashing Robin a double thumbs up.
Robin nodded. "Good. Now nobody give him any hint at all! With everything Chopper's done for us, he deserves a wonderful surprise. Franky, you've got the tree in those barrels, don't you? It just needs to be put together?"
The man nodded.
"Good. That's everything then!"
The crew froze as Chopper's clopping hooves announced his return to the deck. They tripped over each other in their haste to return to their tasks. Zoro caught Chopper's eye and flashed him a smile before Sanji dragged him to the kitchen to help set food out.
Chopper sighed a little sadly as he set out the napkins. A tear slid unbidden down his cheek as he placed the first of the nametags at the foot of one of the two long tables laid out on the deck for the guests. He looked up at the teal and twilit sky, and he worried.
Chapter Four
The first of the boats to arrive was the small ship from Alabasta. Vivi jumped onto the deck and wrapped Sanji in a huge hug. "Straw Hats!" she shouted. The rest of the crew ran to embrace her, falling to a heap on the deck, laughing.
"Vivi!" Chopper cried, last to reach the pile of his crew. He dove headfirst into the mass of people, wrapping his arms around Vivi's neck for a hug.
"Hey there, Chopper!" she said, falling back onto Sanji's face as the force of Chopper's hug carried her backwards.
Sanji's nosebleed rocketed him from beneath Vivi and sent him tumbling towards the ocean. His cigarette fell from his mouth as he flailed madly. A black blur appeared, moving faster than humanly possible, and saved Sanji from falling into the water. Setting Sanji on the deck with one hand and checking his pocket-watch with the other, Sebastian offered the Straw Hats a casual smile. "Oh, hello," he said, moving to help a grumpy-looking Ciel onto the deck.
"CIEL!" Luffy shouted, running full tilt at the young and smartly dressed boy.
"Touch me and die," Ciel said quietly, removing his black gloves and his top hat.
Luffy froze in midair, his hat miraculously suspended above his head. Without a second glance, Ciel set his gloves and hat on Luffy's head and moved farther onto the deck.
"Ah, Brook dear friend," Sebastian said, brandishing a long, thin violin case. "Are you prepared for our duel?"
Brook brandished his bow, "You may be one hell of a butler, but I am one hell of a musician!" he declared.
The two stepped towards one another, their violins ready.
"UNCLE BROOK!" Six voices called in unison.
Brook froze, his arm raised to strike the first chord. Six blonde children stumbled onto the deck and tackled him, their large brown eyes shining in excitement. They were dressed identically, the boys in little tweed suits and the girls in white dresses.
"Uncle Brook, where have you been?" the oldest, a boy, asked. "Since you went West we haven't seen you!"
"Chopper!" one of the girls squeaked, pulling her sister with her as they ran to jump on the tiny deer. "We've missed you!"
"Uncle Luffy, why are you frozen like that?" one of the boys asked, poking Luffy in the face.
"You don't look very nice," the youngest boy said, tugging on the hem of Ciel's coat. The older boy's eyebrow twitched and he visibly resisted the urge to go for his gun.
"Where's my favorite herd of mischief-makers?" Franky said, emerging from below the deck and kneeling to accept the six little blonde torpedoes of happiness that barreled into this chest.
"Franky!" they shouted, all bursting into conversation at once as Franky stood, the children clinging giddily to his shirt and arms.
Sebastian, who was busy cleaning the blood from Sanji's shirt, turned to greet the children's parents, both of whom looked tired and disheveled.
"Mr. Edward, Miss Winry, what an unexpected pleasure," Sebastian said haughtily. "And Maes Hughes! I see that leg is healing nicely!"
Behind a Maes Hughes who supported himself with a dignified cane, came Ed. His hair was all askew and his shirt rumpled. He took off his coat and hung it on the still-frozen Luffy. "Unexpected indeed, Sebastian. Children, get off of Franky, he's not a jungle gym!"
The children froze, all drooping, and slid to the deck.
"Is everyone on deck?" a remarkably pregnant Winry asked, hoisting herself onto the deck with a tired sigh. "Al? Roy? Maes? Caroline? Victoria? James?" She looked at each of her children, nodding, as Ed helped her to her feet.
Nami gasped, running forward to hug her friend, "Winry! Another baby?"
Winry smiled as all the guests crowed around her, offering congratulations to her and Ed, whose arm was protectively around her shoulders. "Yes," she said happily, meeting her husband's eyes. "And I think this will be the last one."
Franky laughed loudly. "Isn't that what you said after the third one?"
"Uncle Franky," Al, Ed and Winry's eldest son asked. "Where do babies come from?"
The cyborg colored as all the children turned to him with similar questions. The adults laughed and talked jovially as Sanji ushered them forward onto the decorated deck, offering spiced wine, eggnog, and cider from gigantic vats.
"And will Mr. And Mrs. Mustang be joining us this evening?" Sebastian asked.
Hughes nodded. "Of course! But typical Roy, he put on some ridiculous outfit and Reza had to fix it. They'll be here before dinner."
"Typical Mustang," Zoro said, taking a gigantic swig from his mug of wine.
"Oh, Ciel, would you be good enough to watch the children?" Winry asked, putting her hand on the boy's shoulder.
"What? Why am I the babysitter?" Ciel burst out.
"You know, children, Ciel can tell you a good deal about London. You've never been, I believe?" Sebastian asked.
All six children turned to Ciel and immediately began asking questions. "Thank you so much," he said, meeting Sebastian's eyes scornfully.
Leaving Ciel surrounded by the Elfric children, the adults set to drinking and talking. Luffy had removed the various coats and hats from his body, leaving them hanging on chairs around the deck. He and Ed sat comparing scars and adventures, while Winry, Vivi, and the Straw Hat women spoke of navigation techniques, weapons, and the mechanical repair of husbands.
Sanji had retired to the kitchen, with Sebastian following him. The chef's face grew increasingly red, his muscles tight, and his smile forced as the demon offered tips for improving Sanji's most prized dishes.
And then, when it was dark and Sanji was almost ready to reveal the wonders of FOE P, the last boat arrived.
A line of flame, like a comet along the water, preceded its arrival at the Sunny's side. Without stopping his boat, which crashed ungracefully into the Sunny's side, Ace jumped straight up and landed on the deck. "I don't smell my younger brother anywhere around here! Has he already become king and forgotten to told me about it?"
"Ace!" Luffy shouted, running towards his brother.
With a smile, Ace jumped out of Luffy's way, climbing effortlessly up the mast and enticing his brother to chase him. The two laughed and ran about the rigging, followed at some clumsy distance by Al, who had broken away from the overwhelmed Ciel in order to follow his favorite uncles.
Sanji brandished a ladle covered in gravy. "If either of you fall in the food so help me God I will-"
"Kill you with this ladle! We know!" the brothers chorused in unison, continuing their game of tag.
Robin looked around, relieved to see that both Zoro and Whitebeard were nowhere to be seen, though Marco, Thatch, and other members of the Whitebeard Pirates were powering their way onto the deck, filling the ship with jovial chatter. "Ciel," Robin said gently, moving towards him.
Ciel looked up at her hatefully, his eye patch askew, hair disheveled, and coat rumpled and displaced. One of Ed and Winry's children sat on his head. "What?" he said.
Robin could not help laughing. "Would you like a break? Doctor-san was going to fetch Christmas cookies for the children to decorate."
Ciel stood, three of the children hanging from him, and grabbed Robin's shoulders. "Did you say Christmas cookies?" he asked eagerly.
Robin nodded uneasily.
"I love Christmas cookies! Oh, may I decorate some too, please? With frosting, and sprinkles, and candies? Will they be shaped like little men, or trees, or stars? Those are my favorite! Children, did you hear that? We're going to decorate cookies!"
Everyone on the ship had fallen silent, looking in astonishment at the usually serious boy, who had removed his fancy coat and knelt in front of the children, already helping each plan the types and colors of cookies they would decorate. He stopped, meeting the adults' eyes. "I could still have every one of you killed," he said, turning back to the children.
Chopper and Usopp emerged from the kitchen carrying a massive amount of cookies, frosting, candies, and sprinkles. Ciel and the Elfric children could barely wait for the platter to be set before them. They grabbed cookies and decorating materials and set about decorating, Ciel leading and instructing each child to create masterpieces of his own design.
"Alright, let's see what we can get done here," Hughes said, lowering himself down onto the deck.
Ciel handed him a cookie and began detailing the creation of a figure that would look like Nami when it was finished. Hughes laughed and deliberately put the wrong color frosting on the little cookie's face. Ciel's eyes went wide. "Calm down, Ciel. It's Christmas Eve, relax!"
Ciel all but melted into the deck.
Chopper worked with Victoria, the youngest of the Elfric children, to cover a gigantic star-shaped cookie in yellow and green stripes. "Mr. Chopper, do you think Santa will come tonight?" she asked quietly.
Chopper looked up at the dark sky. "Yes, I think so Victoria. Robin says he will, and she knows everything!"
"Fire-Fist Ace, you are under arrest by the order of the Flame Alchemist!" Roy Mustang's voice echoed across the deck as he stepped onto the ship, with his lovely wife in tow.
Ace froze where he was, swinging Al from one hand and Luffy from the other as he hung upside down from one of the sail's support beams. "Well if it isn't Roy Mustang!" he said, swinging his brother and Al into the sail and sending them sliding down to the deck, where they barely missed hitting various covered dishes. Ace himself dropped effortlessly to the deck, somersaulting in the air and landing on his feet, arms crossed.
The two men stood staring at one another. Mustang's face broke into a smile first. "Come here you flaming son-of-a-bitch!" he yelled.
"Language!" Sanji shouted, throwing a spoon so hard that it struck Mustang's forehead and bounced to hit Ace in the stomach.
Shamed, the two men shook hands in silence. "So, I hear you two got hitched last week! I guess my invitation got lost in the mail?!" Ace asked, outraged.
Mustang smiled crookedly, unable to resist the challenge in Ace's voice. "Why would I want you there? I'm sure you would have just gotten drunk and burned everything to the ground!"
"Oh, be nice Roy!" Reza laughed, putting her arms around the two men and giving each a kiss on the cheek. "Ladies, I have a very special surprise for each of you!" she said, pushing Ace and Mustang out of the way as she moved forward, holding up a black bag that jingled with the sound of blades.
"If you're not going to fight this vagabond, then I will!" Sebastian declared, holding a fork to Mustang's throat.
"Not if I have anything to say about it!" Luffy declared, reeling back his fist in a mock attempt to punch Sebastian.
"All of you back off, or I'll kill you!" Ed said, clapping his hands together, his metal arm becoming a punch dagger.
Zoro emerged from below the deck, sensing a fight, and drew three baguettes from the basket by the kitchen in place of his swords. "I bet I could still kick your asses just using these!" he said.
Mustang was the first to move, snapping and shooting a ball of flame at Ace. It was ineffective as Ace crossed his arms in front of his face, deflecting the fire towards Sebastian. The butler jumped high in the air, his flight carrying him all the way across the deck to where Zoro stood waiting. The fork lodged itself in the baguette Zoro drew up to block it, and he tore Sebastian's weapon from his hand.
Ed barreled into Luffy, who was running to defend Ace from Mustang. His fist collided with the captain's and both men swore loudly, shaking their hands. Ace and Mustang's flames were leaving scorch marks on the deck as they parried one another's blows and danced across the s hip. Neither could strike the other, just as Luffy and Ed were unable to catch one another's blows anywhere but on their own raised blocks. Zoro and Sebastian continued their dance, the Straw Hat unafraid to draw his swords against a demon. Sebastian smiled in respect as sandai kitetsu deflected wave after wave of his silverware, and Zoro's eyes were beaming with the challenge of an undefeatable enemy.
"Dunderheads!" a voice shouted.
Each of the fighters found themselves knocked to the deck by a spoonful of dough straight to the face. Sanji stood above them, his eyes dark, ladle in his hand. "Do you know what you could have done to FOE P?!"
"What the hell is foepee?" Ed asked, looking at Luffy.
Sanji struck him hard on the head with the ladle. "Quiet! You, Edward Elfric, are unworthy of knowing the true name of FOE P. But should you choose to fight again in its presence, or to swear, or to move at any speed above a leisurely walk I will serve you in a lovely casserole for New Year's Eve dinner! And the same goes for every one of you! You are to sit down this instant, each one of you, at the seat assigned to you by Chopper! And if any of you so much as moves from that seat, there will be consequences!"
"What sort of consequences?" Luffy asked, swallowing hard.
Sanji's eyes darkened further, and he swept the ladle along the line of fallen warriors. "No dessert."
All their mouths fell open and without another word each marched to his seat and sat there quietly. Even Sebastian was silent, either contemplating complex calculus or understanding the weight of his crimes.
"And now," Sanji said. "I believe it is time for dinner."
Chapter Five
The night continued in a cheery fashion. As the darkness deepened, Ace and Mustang lit all the candles on deck, and as the food disappeared each person on deck became slowly more relaxed. Even Ciel was able to calm down almost for minutes at a time, and engaged in conversation with Ed about alchemy and its scientific principles. Chopper's nametags were a hit, each one unique and sparkling. They, and the individualized cookies that were Ciel and the children's pride and joy, gave the evening an almost magical air.
FOE P, Sanji's masterpiece, was astoundingly delicious. There was turkey and ham and roast beast, potatoes with cheese and onions, and gravy so salty and delicious that even Sebastian could not accurately reproduce it. The butler had prepared his own specialty: curry buns, and the Straw Hats accepted them gratefully, demanding that Sanji add them to his list of recipes. Roasted corn and boiled corn and corn on the cob and creamed corn and corn with butter and salt were placed in front of Chopper, and he ate until he could eat no more. Each type of corn was different and wonderful. At the children's table, of which Ciel was the head, games were played. Ciel presented riddles, whose solutions would yield an extra scoop of potatoes or a dab of gravy for prizes. Chopper and Al headed a game of I spy. Ciel, at an extreme disadvantage, became grumpy and manic each time one of the Elfric children was able to sight something before he did.
The adults joined in the children's games, antagonizing Zoro with navigational riddles and driving Luffy mad with scientific questions. Robin and Sebastian competed in a battle of wits, where Robin held her own until Sebastian began speaking of times long before the study of history had even been invented. Nami and Winry competed stunningly in arm wrestling matches, defeating each man who challenged them and finding themselves so evenly matched that no winner of the match could be declared. After dinner, Sanji allowed Brook and Sebastian to finish their musical duel. The level of their playing was so astounding that their improvised compositions were impossible to distinguish from one another and melded into one golden wave of sound. It left the whole crew with a new sense of energy, and when Zoro pulled Nami up onto the deck to dance, Sanji and Robin were not slow to follow. Ed and Winry joined as best as they could, Winry's large belly making the steps awkward. Hughes skipped in a circle with the children and Chopper, and they took turns making up their own jigs in the center of the circle. But the true stars were Mr. and Mrs. Mustang. Roy swung Reza so effortlessly about, their steps in perfect time with the music, that the others stopped to watch, clapping along with the two violinists. At the piece's conclusion, Roy dipped his bride so low her hair brushed the deck and then pulled her into a passionate kiss. Everyone erupted into applause, the children averting their faces behind Hughes' legs and making disgusted noises.
As the Mustangs pulled apart, Robin met Zoro's eyes, then Sanji's, and nodded. The guests were being handed more cookies by the children, who followed Ciel and Chopper's instructions to the letter. The swordsman and the chef disappeared below the deck, under the guise of going to prepare dessert.
Robin turned as a hand fell gently on her shoulder. "Miss Robin," Sebastian said, "may I be of assistance in any way?"
Robin smiled. "You know, butler-san, I think you may."
Chapter Six
Chopper was having so much fun at the party that he almost forgot about how worried he was. He was almost able to ignore the empty place at the head of the adults' table, where he had placed his nametag for Santa. Whitebeard's place was also empty, and even Ace was unable to say where he'd gone. This worried Chopper, but not enough to take his mind off of the gigantic cookie he and Victoria Elric had made, which Luffy and Ace were fighting over.
"Chopper," Victoria asked, tugging on the end of his sleeve, "why are Uncle Ace and Uncle Luffy fighting?"
He put his arm around her shoulders. "Because, Victoria, our cookie is so delicious that nobody could contain himself!"
Victoria tilted her head. "Do you think Santa would like a cookie like that?"
Chopper scanned the now totally dark sky, his brow furrowing. "You know, Victoria, I don't know if—"
"HO, HO, HO!" a voice bellowed.
Chopper froze, his jaw dropping as he and Victoria turned towards the door to the kitchen, where a gigantic, red-suited figure had appeared on deck. He stood with his hands on his hips, red hat almost as bright as his smile, his gigantic appearance increased by a red cape that billowed out behind him.
"Santa?!" Seven amazed child voices and many more drunk adult ones chorused.
Chopper's eyes filled with giddy tears as he approached the big man. "Is…is it really you?"
Santa adjusted hat and looked down at a notecard he held. "Uh…yes, ho, ho, ho! It's me, Santa, here to bring you all the most wonderful and magical dessert you've ever had!" The man bent to one knee. "You must be Tony Tony Chopper. Someone told me you're a reindeer, is that right?"
Astounded, Chopper nodded. The Elfric children all looked at him, amazed. "Why, yes I am. I'm a blue-nosed reindeer from Drum Island!"
Santa nodded, rocking back on his heels. "A blue nose? Why that's the most impressive thing I've ever heard! Wouldn't you say, Rudolph?"
From the rigging dropped the oddest figure any of them had ever seen. Hughes, Mustang, and Ed, by far the drunkest of the bunch, all did double takes and dropped from their chairs onto the deck. Zoro, not far behind in drunkenness, would have drawn a sword had it not been for the fact that he was taking a nap on top of a half-eaten leg of turkey. Ciel shook his head and smiled ruefully, lifting one of the Elfric children so they could see more easily.
It was tall, standing regally with its hands outstretched as though expecting praise. A smart tuxedo and white gloves would have made for a snappy outfit, had the gigantic head of a deer not been protruding from the suit's neck. The figure pirouetted gracefully and set off prancing down the deck. Even Santa looked amazed at its appearance, especially at the red nose that winked on and of as the figure raised its arms and flapped in the imitation of flight. "Oh Santa, I have come from the far reaches of North Blue to visit the ship of these fair Straw Hat pirates and their lovely guests, for I am Rudolph of the Glowing Nose, most glorious of reindeer!" Rudolph fell into a graceful bow as he stopped before the Elfric children and Chopper.
All eyes on the ship were wide, Chopper's especially. "Rudolph?" he asked. "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?"
The figure got to his knees and pointed to his nose. "Oh yes, Tony Tony Chopper, I, like you, have a unique nose."
"Did you eat a Devil Fruit?" Luffy asked, coming towards Rudolph and poking him in the head. "I thought only Chopper could talk!"
The figure rose to its feet and pointed menacingly at the captain. "Do not question the magical Rudolph, Monkey D. Luffy, or there will be no dessert feasting for you!"
Luffy whipped around, "Sanji, you have Santa's reindeer on your side?! You didn't tell me that!"
"Ho, ho, ho, speaking of dessert, I think it's just about time! If your drunken friends would get off the deck then perhaps I could arrange something!"
"Oi, drunken asshats, get up!" Reza said, splashing the three men with water from Winry's glass.
Responding instinctively to Hawkeye's voice, the three men stood and saluted. "I didn't do it!" Ed said.
"It's not my fault!" Mustang barked.
"I'm not really dead!" Hughes shouted.
All three men turned and saw Santa standing directly above them. "Edward Elfric, Roy Mustang, Maes Hughes, you three have been on the naughty list for quite some time. I think it will take some serious appeasement to get off."
The men exchanged looks. Ed glanced over Santa's shoulder at his children, who stood in an excited huddle around Rudolph and Chopper. "Uh…I had kids, doesn't that count? You know, I never really even thought you were real, and—"
"Silence!" Santa bellowed. "I will have none of your tomfoolery! The three of you are to be my slaves for the evening, and to help with the presentation of the magical dessert feast! That will be sufficient to get you moved into List Purgatory, the dreadful space between Naughty and Nice."
Mustang and Hughes, still drunk enough that they were unable to walk straight, saluted Santa. Ed followed suit, and the big man gestured for them, Rudolph, and Sanji to follow him towards the kitchen. "Ho, ho, ho!" Santa cried for good measure.
When the men were gone, all the Elfric children ran to jump on their mother. "Mama, mama, Santa came! He's here! Do you think he has presents?!"
"I think he's here to bring dessert on this ship, and then he'll leave your presents under the tree Daddy worked so hard to cut down an then struggled to put lights and ornaments on," Winry said with a smile.
The children, confused by the sarcasm and bitterness in their mother's voice, turned to look for Franky.
Chopper ran across the deck and jumped into Robin's arms, planting a kiss on her cheek. "Robin, you were right! Santa came, he came for me! And he brought Rudolph, too! How did he do that, Robin?"
Robin shrugged. "Santa's magic, Chopper. That's all I can say."
Chapter Seven
Santa, as it turns out, was a jolly lot of fun. He and the drunkards presented Sanji's masterpiece, a cake eight feet tall decorated entirely in white icing. It was formed in the shape of the Thousand Sunny heading off towards adventure, a gigantic wave at her back. It was complete with perfectly painted chocolate figurines of each of the crew in their favorite spots on the deck. Luffy was amazed, and examined his own body to make sure he was still there and hadn't been magically transported into Sanji's cake. As an extra surprise, Sanji had spent the afternoon painting figurines of each of the guests, and allowed them to place themselves wherever they wanted on the ship. Ciel was not allowed to place his figurine until last, lest his OCD get the better of him.
And although its appearance was stunning, the cake's taste and flavor were truly exquisite. Unable to decide between a lightly prepared yellow cake with dashes of strawberry filling, a rich chocolate layer cake, and a whipped lemon cake, Sanji had divided the Sunny up into three separate cakes and offered a piece of each to the guests. The children were ecstatic as Franky lifted each of them to see high onto the model ship. They were even more ecstatic, verging on insane, when they had finished eating the delicious cake. Santa challenged all persons under 5 feet in height to a game of tag around the deck. Ed was enraged when Winry joked he should be included in the group, and ran after Santa determined to catch him. But despite his age, the old man was quick to dodge the older Elfric, careful only to let his clan of children and their friend Chopper catch him.
Ace challenged his brother, Zoro, and anyone else brave enough to a drinking contest, to be followed by a similar game of tag. Nami drank them all under the table, and Winry, Robin, and Reza got a good laugh out of seeing their friends drunkenly try and escape Santa. By the end, Ace was so drunk he was unable even to catch Victoria, who clung to his knee as she grew more and more tired.
The sugar rush was beginning to wear off, all the children ready to head home. The Mustangs and Hughes made an early departure, as they had been due back at the Eastern Military Headquarters over an hour before. Hughes gave Santa a big hug before he left, and Santa promised him that his leg would be healed within the year. As a gift, he gave Hughes a gigantic photo album with the name 'Alicia' written in pink rhinestones on the cover. To the Mustangs he gave a gorgeous set of matching weapons. For Roy a steel-grey set of gloves made from old and fine flint from a far island, that would allow his fire more size and speed. And for Reza a pistol carved out of the same material, whose barrel was so straight and light that with her talents it would be virtually impossible to miss.
Ciel, yawning though he tried to act adult, nodded at Rudolph that it was time to go. Making an excuse that he had urgent matters to attend to in South Blue, Rudolph took off vertically and flew away into the dark. Minutes later, Sebastian appeared and bowed to his master. On their way off the deck, Santa gave each of them a gift as well. For Sebastian, a new set of throwing knives. Santa thought throwing silverware was tacky, and the new knives were carved from Sea King ivory, which Santa described as the most badass material ever. For Ciel there was a new eye patch as well as an exquisite map of London that detailed things not only on the street level, but under it. The boy smiled mischievously, already plotting.
Though the Elfric children did their best to stifle their yawns and drooping eyes, Santa said that if they did not agree to go he feared for their mother's well-being. Winry looked exhausted, and relieved as Santa sat on the deck with all the children around him and told them a story, in order to calm them down. It was a tragic love story of a pirate named Roger and his beautiful mistress Rouge. Ace's eyes teared up, and Luffy put his arm around his brother's shoulders. The Straw Hats all found themselves moved by the accuracy and detail with which Santa told the story. Chopper, sitting almost in Santa's lap, looked up at the man and smiled when he described how a great man, Straw Hat Luffy, had received a hat from Red-Hair Shanks and that had changed the world.
His mellow voice had the children exhausted, and when the story was done they went unrelenting to the boat, each accepting a gift from Santa. For the Elfric boys, slingshots and bows with rubber arrows, for the girls miniature wrenches and screwdrivers so they could follow in their mother's footsteps. Winry gave Santa a kiss on the cheek as she left. "Thank you, Whitebeard," she whispered.
He winked, handing her a delicately wrapped box. When she opened it, Winry smiled. "And thank you again," she said. It was a portrait, beautifully painted, of Ed, Al, and Winry when they were children. Each was smiling, each happy and unscarred. It almost brought tears to her eyes as she descended the ladder into the boat where her children waited.
For Ed there was a hunk of meteorite, a material so rare that Santa said if he could make anything of it using alchemy, it would no doubt be worth enough to feed his family for a year. He also offered a set of matching rings, also of meteorite. "I know your anniversary is coming up, don't disappoint your wife," he said with a wink. The reflective band of Winry's ring was nothing to the gorgeous pearl that nestled snugly in its face. Ed smiled, offering Santa a firm handshake.
It was only pirates on the ship, after that. Thatch, Marco, and Ace had passed out from drunkenness before the Elfrics had left, and Santa woke each with a slap to the face. "Boys, it's time to go," Santa said, gesturing to the edge of the deck.
They looked at one another, confused. "But, aren't you coming-"
"Get on your boat, or there'll be no presents for you!"
The three men shrugged and moved towards the deck. "Ace, wait," Santa said. He gestured for Luffy to come and stand beside his brother. "I have something for the both of you. You two have been through so much, not only as pirates but as brothers. True brothers. So here, these are for you." From a pocket in his suit, Santa took two rolled scrolls of paper. Ace and Luffy unrolled them at the same time. Though Luffy took longer to read, he did not hesitate a moment when Ace ran forward to embrace him.
"We're really brothers!" Ace shouted.
Luffy was crying, "weren't we always?" he said.
On the two papers was written an identical passage:
By the power vested in me by my standing as a medical doctor I, Trafalgar Law, authorize Edward Whitebeard Newgate to adopt Monkey D. Luffy and Portgass D. Ace into his family. With their signatures on these papers it shall be made legal throughout the world that they are his lawful sons, brothers by name and by fatherhood. Should they sign below, their names will be legally changed to Portgass D. Ace Newgate and Monkey D. Luffy Newgate. Should they not choose to sign these papers then they're dumbasses and don't deserve Whitebeard's friendship anyway.
Signed on this date of December 21st
Trafalgar Law
Without hesitation Luffy and Ace ran to the table and signed the papers. Pens were unavailable, but Santa laughed and said that he was sure Whitebeard would accept signatures in gravy. Ace embraced his new brother, promising he'd come back to the Thousand Sunny soon, and ran to the waiting boat, jumping off the deck without a thought for the ladder.
Santa promised he'd leave presents for all the Straw Hats that night, but said he had one very special thing to give before he went. "Tony Tony Chopper," he said, beckoning the reindeer forward.
"Go on, Ototo!" Zoro said excitedly, lifting Chopper down from the chair beside him.
Chopper swallowed, walking bravely forward to meet Santa. "Yes sir?" he said.
Santa put a bow on Chopper's hat. The reindeer looked up and around, trying to find it. "Not only are you a gift yourself, Tony Tony Chopper, but you have given so much to this crew."
Chopper tried to choke back the tears of joy that leaked from his eyes.
Santa smiled. "And so for you, Chopper, I have this. Keep it well, and never lose hope that it will guide you."
Chopper opened his eyes on the gift Santa had given him. It was a compass, larger than both of his hooves and beautifully golden. On its face was a picture of the entire crew, all smiling and laughing, and the needle had the shape of a tiny straw hat. "A compass?" he asked.
Santa poked Chopper in the chest. "This is a very special compass. It does not get its power from magnetic fields, like a Log Pose. Instead it gets its strength from you. You and your crew. If you're ever lost from them, or ever need to cheer up, this compass will lead you to what makes you truly happy: your nakama."
"Thank you," Chopper said, running forward to give Santa a hug.
Santa offered the other straw hats a wink. "You all aren't forgetting I'm father Christmas are you? I want a hug from every pirate on this ship!"
Laughing, the Straw Hats ran forward and enveloped Santa in a huge hug. At the center, Chopper smiled, surrounded by his nakama. "Merry Christmas, Ototo!" Zoro said, his lungs nearly crushed by Santa's arms.
"You too, Oni!" Chopper said, turning to offer Zoro a hug.
"Merry Christmas to everyone!" Santa said, leaning back and picking all the straw hats up at once, spinning them in a circle that sent them sprawling on the deck, laughing and confused.
Chapter Eight
Zoro was the last awake. His hangover fading, he'd volunteered to stay and wait for Whitebeard to take his Santa costume off. Chopper slept soundly on his shoulder, his little head lolling against Zoro's, adding a dimension of comfort and companionship to the night. The little bells on Chopper's hat jingled as Zoro stood, leaving the reindeer comfortably tucked under one of the long tables, where the wind and chilly night air would be unable to touch him. Filling a wooden mug with water, Zoro carefully stepped over the plate of cookies Chopper, Ciel, and the Elfric children had left for Santa in the middle of the deck.
The night wind rushed past the swordsman's face, reminding him of home. He reached up and patted the pocket of his jacket that contained a ring box he would present to Nami the following morning, along with a proposal. He smiled, thinking that Luffy could marry them the very next afternoon, with his authority as a ship's captain. He looked over his shoulder at Chopper. "You'll be my best man, Ototo," Zoro said quietly.
"And what do you want for Christmas, young man?" a kindly voice asked from behind him.
Zoro jumped, turning and pressing his hand to his heart as he saw Santa approaching him. Without the billowing red cape Usopp had added to his Santa costume, Whitebeard looked smaller. "Hey, you scared me!" he said.
Santa nodded, coming to lean against the ship's side with the swordsman. "I asked what you wanted for Christmas," he said in earnest.
Zoro looked out to sea, at the lights of a town he could see passing at an unbelievable distance. "I don't know, I don't really ask for much," he said. "Why are you asking, Whitebeard?"
The red-clad man met Zoro's eyes evenly. "I think you want a wedding dress for Nami," he said. "And a bouquet of her favorite lilies from her home to be her bouquet. And for you, I think…a quiet day. To walk on the beach with only the woman you love. None of this swordsman nonsense…And to see Kuina again."
Zoro's eyes narrowed. "How do you…I never told you about Kuina," he said, hand itching towards his sword.
"Here, it's the least I can do," Santa said, handing Zoro a thin, white envelope.
"Hey, Zoro!" Someone called from behind.
Instinctively, Zoro turned. He shook his head as Whitebeard approached him, pulling the last strands of false hair from his moustache.
"What! Wait, what the-" Zoro whipped around. The Santa who had stood beside him at the deck was gone. In his place was a gigantic stack of presents, and a beautiful Christmas tree. At its top, instead of a star, was a glass ornament in the shape of the Straw Hats' jolly roger.
"Who are you talking to?" Whitebeard asked, clapping him on the shoulder.
Zoro turned around in amazement, shaking his head. "You know, Whitebeard, I don't think you'd believe me if I told you."
Epilogue
When he woke up the next morning, Chopper could not stop smiling. Though the sun had barely crested the horizon, he ran to awaken his crew. Sanji and Franky rolled out of bed reluctantly, followed by a dazed-looking Brook and a beaming Zoro. Usopp and Luffy were already on deck, screaming and jumping up and down, tossing presents to each of the men and shouting down to the girls that it was time to wake up.
Chopper stared in amazement at the ship that was so magically transformed. Not only had the tables from the party been cleaned up, but it was actually snowing aboard the Thousand Sunny! The crew scratched their heads in amazement, but Nami and Usopp winked at one another knowingly. They were the first to throw snowballs, and the first to pick Chopper up and toss him as high as they could so he landed laughing in a snowdrift.
After a hearty breakfast, they all set in to opening presents. Nami received a stunning white gown and A bouquet of lilies from her homeland. When she looked around for the gift's donor, Chopper watched and cheered with the rest of his crew as Zoro bent to one knee and pulled a gorgeous diamond ring from his pocket, asking Nami to marry him then and there.
She accepted, of course, and before any of the crew knew what was happening, they all found themselves in attendance at Zoro and Nami's Christmas wedding. Luffy needed much assistance from Robin with some of the bigger words he had to say as officiator, and though the service ended with the captain screaming, "just kiss her already, goddammit!" everyone got the message. Especially Chopper, who stood proudly beside his Oni, with a little tuxedo and a bow tied to his head. The bow itched, and Chopper longed to take it off, but it made Nami smiled and so he settled for spinning in circles to try and move it.
Sanji received a new recipe book, Usopp a new set of tools, and Zoro a sword striped white and gold, almost like a candy cane. There was also an unaddressed letter to him, which read only: it's our secret. Though none of his crew understood it, the letter made Zoro smile.
It continued to snow throughout the morning, but as the clouds cleared the Straw Hats found themselves singing in time to Brook's violin. His favorite song, Bink's Sake, to which, it seemed, there was a strange, bellowing accompaniment. Had he been ble to cry, Brook would have burst into tears when a gigantic whale appeared next to the ship, almost seeming to call out his name. Unable to contain himself, Brook jumped from the ship and landed on the whale's back, laughing and screaming "Laboon! I found you!"
Robin was given a book of codes to help her decipher the stars and many languages the crew had not even encountered, and Franky found himself the proud new owner of a set of metal noses that changed his appearance.
And as for Chopper, he had a new set of rainbow bandages and all the cotton candy he could ever want.