Disclaimer:

Hi! Sorry I have to put this in but I'm excited to be actually writing again! I realised a few months ago that I had no talent and committed fanfictional suicide. BUT I'M BACK! MUAHHAHAHAHA. Now you will have to suffer through MORE of my abysmal works. Actually, I think this is pretty good. Half is by me, the rest by in)sane, who, sadly, hasn't yet come back from the fanfictionally dead. So, yeah, a breif explanation.

See that thing up at the top (ish) of the page? Yeah, where it says my pen name is Shenzi? That's 'cos it is. However, I am writing this in character. And the character I'm writing it as would have a penname more like FoxieChic1 or H0+LuVah4 so I thought I'd tell you that. I'd tell you the real person I'm making fun of, but she's definitely going to read this, and I don't want to get slapped again (ha.) so I will withhold that information. I love not telling people things. It makes them NUTS. Muahahahahaha. The real me will be imputing sarcastic comments et cetera in italics which will always be found in parenthesis. By the way, all spelling/grammar mistakes, MarySues, poorly formed sentences or EVEN tense changes are purely intentional. Now say goodbye to my (somewhat) usual eloquence and laugh your head off at:

THE MOST TYPICAL POORLY WRITTEN DITZY FANFICTION EVER

a.k.a.

Twin Souls

Oh yeah, I don't own Harry Potter (BUT I WISH I DID:wink wink giggle:)

A young girl of about16 years of age leapt over the banister and fell on a young man of about 17 years of age. She was very pretty with red hair and green almond shaped eyes. She was about five feet six inches with waist-length hair the color of red-orange down to her waist. She was wearing hot pink robes over a black skirt that came down to her legs and a black T-shirt that said the weird sisters on it and she had knee high hot pink boots with a black flower pattern on them that were made out of leather (only it wasn't really because real leather boots are really expensive so it was just shiny plastic over cloth that looks like leather but isn't). The boy was about six feet one with dark black hair of normal length and a scar on his forehead. He was was wearing muggle clothes that look like the belonged to some fat ugly kid named Dudly along time ago. His hair was messy his glasses were broken. He looked like his father accept for his eyes which (oddly enough) looked like his mother's. His eyes had cicles under them (I have always wanted to see someone with circles UNDER their eyes. Usually dark circles appear AROUND one's eyes and even then, it's usually only when they've been hit in the face). as I was saying his eyes had cirlces under them like someone who just finished reading War and peace for the seventh time and had to anotate it in Cyrillic. In fact Oregano could see that he had just finished reading War and Peace because he had a copu with notes in Cyrillic sticking out on little pink post-it notes.

Oregano had transferre dto HOgwarts from Salem Acadamy in ameraca (doesn't it seem that most poorly written American fanfics include a character from Salem?) She was so excited about getting to go to hogwards where the famous Harry potte r went to school! (this character doesn't care about leaving her friends…hmm…MAYBE she HAD NO FRIENDS! HA!) Her parents are both magiv which meant htat she was a purebolld. She didn't care about being perfect though because she liked herself just plain how eshe was.

Anyway as soon as she fell on this guy she knw that it was LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT. "Wow" she said "you're kinda hot." "you to." He said "we should date." "okay!" so they did.

The next day oregano was walking with harry through the halls of hogworts. They were holding hands. Suddenly a young man of about 17 years of age walked out they never seem to say where they walked out from. They just walk out from...space and two other young men of about 17 years of age walked with him. One was on his left and one was on his right side. They young man in the center had devilish looks that endeared him to her. He had light blonde hair and cold gray eyes (A/N: or is it grey? does it matter? I forget. Maybe ones the British spelling) and when they peirced Oregano she felt her heart give a queer lurch. He was wearing hogwarts robes but also a shirt underneath that had a picture of a happy face with a gangsta hat (A/N: The wool kind, you know? Like one time my mom was watching one of thsoe stupid old shows about some band and there was this guy in the band who always wore a hat like that only he wasnt a gansta he just always wore that hat and thats the hat i mean and the happy face was frowning so it wasnt a happy face but you know what i mean.) He was also wearing black combat boots with a sticker for Good Charlotte on the right one and the left one had a sticker for Marilyn Manson and the right one also had a sticker for the White Stripes.

He looked at Harry coldly. "Well look boys" he said "Potty's got a gf." he said coldly. "Dont they look cute."

The other boys laughed and nodded. They never describe the ugly people, do they?

Then Draco because for some reason we know his name now turned to oregano. "look me up when you want a real man, babe." sounds really funny when you say it out loud. Manbabe. Then he winked. While he walked away, oregano felt weak at the knees, she knew she sholdnt but she really liked Draco and she really liked Harry. She had a problem.

A/N: ok guys, sorry this chapter's a little short but i've been realy busy with school (im totaly flunking math!) and next week itll be longer i swear. Review, please! With sugar on top:P

Hi, this is the real author. Actually, it's more of a joint thing…I wrote some of it and my friend in)sane wrote the rest...you already know that..Wow, it's hard to stop writing ditzy…ugh…:shudder: yeah, so you can tell our comments apart because I use (parenthesis) and she uses brackets. Yes, I know that was really lame, showing you what brackets and parenthesis are by using them. Dang, brackets aren't going to work...Anyway, that was dumb. HEY, I JUST WROTE PART OF THE ABOVE FANFICTION. By all rights, I should be unconcious. So yeah, for those of you who ignored the disclaimer, all spelling and grammar mistakes are on purpose. I'm saying this because if I had just read that fanfiction, I would have shot the author.

Anyway, tune in for chapter two soon (ish) and have a nice day! Wait, I think I'm supposed to say to review. Isn't that what most people do here? Eh, who cares...