I walked on over to the fridge, open it and sighed. No food. Again. Living with just mom is amazing; having such an immature parent can be fun at times. The way she's my best friend and my mom, the closest person to me in the world is always a bonus, but we never seem to have any food. Grocery shopping as she puts it is my responsibility, since I have all the free time. I never know when to go though, I mean I'm the kid I shouldn't have to go out and buy food! How am I supposed to know what to get?
"Mom we're out of food again!" I yell from the kitchen as I take out the last of the eggs and milk, setting them on the counter
"We have bread, make yourself some toast." As I check the bread I roll my eyes.
"Yeah it's out of date like every damn thing in this house," I yell back. I abandon any thoughts of having breakfast here and start to slip on my boots.
"Here, stop being such a smartass and take this and go buy some food," She hands over what looks like fifty dollars.
"But-"
"Renesmee Just go I don't have time to do it today."
"You want me to go without a list again?" I smirk at her.
"I've made a shopping list; do you really think I'm going to trust you to do shopping without a list again?" She looked at me with hard eyes.
"That was the best three weeks of my life!" I protest, patting my belly and smiling at her.
"You ate nothing but crap, because that's all you bought!" She looked down at me, her face turning hard. I wasn't smiling anymore.
"Yeah but it was pretty funny to see Esme and Carlisle's faces when they came over and you served them little Debbie snack cakes , chocolate chip cookies, smores , and a bowl filled with potato chips ," I giggle, slipping on my other shoe.
"You have no idea how much criticism I got for that Ness," She muttered as she grabbed her keys from the small table in the kitchen that had four chairs squeezed around. It was placed in the middle of the room.
"okay I will be back by six, don't stay out too late with Jake. Please!" She sighed as she grabbed her shiny new high heeled shoes. Mom although she could be as immature as me has quite an important job. She bagged herself a job as one of the managers at one of the biggest companies in town. To say at the least she is bringing in a lot of money. Since it's only ever been just me and mom, we have struggled a bit and money has always been tight, but we've managed. She's managed.
She left the kitchen and shortly after I hear the front door softly click as it shuts. I smirk to myself. Abandoning the money on the table I slip out the back door, running for the woods. It's my only freedom, where I go to think, and be by myself. The woods are at the back of my house. It's not strange not really! I've always had a connection to the outdoors, I love it! I used to camp out sometimes, when mom was working the night shift at the local diner, when Carlisle and Esme would babysit. She hates the outdoors, always saying that it's wet and muddy and nasty to be around. She doesn't see the beauty and the adventure of climbing trees to see over the hills and whatever other scenery gets in the way.
Mother has told me that I get the love of outdoors from my father. That no good gutless bastard. I wouldn't know though, not that I would ever want to know because I despise the fact that I'm probably just like him when it comes to the love of outdoors. I don't want to know him, I don't need to know a coward like him.
I didn't think it was even possible to hate someone I've never met before. Let alone hate someone who's a part of me but the second mum told me what he did, I just knew that I never wanted to know him. See him. Or be part of his pathetic life.
I should have brought a Jacket with me! I knew I should have. Because now I'm freezing my ass off. As I trot through the damp, wet and stinky woods behind my house I smile mainly because this was all mine. It was also where I met Jacob. We were nine maybe ten. I was in the woods and I was lost when I came across a meadow, with a river right next to it. It has to be the most beautiful place I've ever been. Especially in summer when Forks is having half decent weather all kinds of different wild flowers grow. The flowers almost shimmer when it rains and small clear raindrops fall on the flowers petals only to get caught in the sun which makes everything shine. I had ended up sitting there looking at all the little flowers, singing to myself. I didn't sing often only when I was by myself because I didn't really like anyone hearing me, you know it's sort of awkward if someone does.
I had no idea he had been watching me, let alone listening, But he had. It was only after about an hour of him secretly watching me that he tripped over a hidden branch in the ground as he went to walk away. He tumbled to the ground from the bush he had been behind, making me jump and turn around. I can remember jumping to my feet.
Back then Jacob was a thin, tall delicate looking thing. When I first saw him he looked so shy and innocent. His beautiful dark brown eyes almost looked apologetic as he looked up at me from the ground. He had that perfect shiny teeth smile. You know the sort you see on TV. Back then I didn't know what love was, so I just smiled and blushed at him because he was, as you could say a very beautiful child. I walk over to him slowly, being cautious of the boy who just fell out of a bush.
"Are you spying on me?" I asked raising an eyebrow in a sassy, who the hell are you way that I'd seen mom do so many times.
"I.. I didn't.. I mean.. You have a beautiful voice" He stuttered which turned into a low whisper. I was determined to hold my ground; I can remember I wasn't going to be thrown off by his flattery.
"Well this is my meadow" He'd muttered. Sticking his muddy hand in the pockets of his jeans.
"Oh really?" I laughed in my mocking way, giving him that half smile of mine. The one that Esme always told me would get the boys begging at my feet.
"Yes it is." He'd raised his voice, which had taken me by surprise. But again I just laughed at him.
"Why are you laughing at me?" He demanded angrily. His little cheeks going red with what I thought was embarrassment.
"Because you can't own a meadow, or nature ,nobody can own it, nature owns itself. " I said as a matter of fact before sitting down again. After a second he'd sighed then sat down next to me. I smiled to myself.
"Yeah I guess," He'd muttered as he took the little backpack he had on his back off.
"Want an apple?" he asked politely, giving me the option of a red or green apple. I took the green one.
"So, what's your name?" I asked through a mouth full of apple.
"Jacob, you?" He asked as he munched on the red apple he had in his hand.
"Renesmee" I said out loud a rather too loudly. Jacob's head turned quickly to face me. He lifted his eyebrows up, his face a picture of amusement.
"What?" he almost laughed out loud. I can remember feeling my whole face fall. Not this again. Yes my names funny, but it has sentimental value.
"Don't you dare laugh, stalker boy." I'd spat out at him. He'd put his hand up in front of him meaning 'no offence intended'
"Sorry." He said, biting his lip a little. I sighed.
"Whatever." I muttered. We sat there for a little longer. Not talking, just watching the amazing landscape that stretched out for miles and miles.
"Do you want to go on a walk and get to know each other?" Jacob had asked a little light heartedly. But it made me smile, it had been exactly what I had wanted to do.
"Sure why not," I grinned as I stood up. Jacob followed my lead into the forest, from which we got lost our parents had to put a search party together to find us. That was the first time me and Jacob got in big trouble but it wouldn't be the last. All the same though, I knew I'd had made a new friend.
That was years ago and now Jacob has saved my life so many times. I've honestly stopped keeping count. Years have gone by and all we've done is grow closer. That meadow, well it's our little hide away. The place we'd go to chat, to tell each other our problems, our secrets. It was our meeting place if anything ever happened. I remember once, I'd had a huge argument with mom . It got to the point where she shouted at me and told me that I was just as selfish and stubborn as my dad. She told me she didn't want to look at me. So I ran. I texted Jake to meet me in the meadow, our meadow and that's where I ran to. He was there of course, waiting, sat on the grass with a green apple just for me. That was the first time I realized how much Jake meant to me, or at least how much I meant to him. I mean what other guy would sneak out at eleven at night in his PJ's just to meet me in the woods?
I sat and ate my apple and told Jake all about it. He sat there contently and listened to me bitch about how unfair my life was. As I jabbered on I just couldn't help thinking that Jake was the only guy I feel comfortable around. I mean we weren't kids anymore. Not ten years old. More like thirteen. It made me realize that Jake was a guy, a guy that I happened to really really like... We had our first kiss that night, well it defiantly shut me up. Of course after he convinced me to go back home. Which I did.
It's so nice being in love with my best friend. You got to love your best friend. Right? I mean they're your best friend for a reason. You trust them because you know they'd never let you down. They're so much like you that you feel like no one could understand you but them. That's why Jake is so perfect. I know him like the back of my hand. I don't need to worry because I already know that I trust him completely.
"Hey beautiful!" Jacob's enthusiasm is noted as his beautiful, white teeth smile forms on his face.
"Hey you," I muse as I sit down on the slightly damp grass. Then take my green apple from his bag.
"So what's up with you?" Jacob says brightly. His eyes were closed and his face was held high towards the now showing sun in the sky. His perfect light brown skin looked flawless in the sunlight. My recent thoughts of my dad spring to my mind. Giving me a bitter feeling of anger.
"Nothing much," I mutter.
"Cut the crap Swan. Tell me what's on your mind?"
"No, you've heard it millions of times before," I sigh. I shift from my sitting position to lying down next to him on the grass. I pop my head on his chest, so that I could hear his heartbeat. He folds one hand around my waist, holding me to him.
"Your dad again?" He asks.
"I just can't help hating him Jake," I mutter. He can use all of his talent to talk me out of my hatred for my dad but it won't work. I can hate him. I can hate whoever I want.
"Babe we've been through this! You don't know your dad. Okay he was a complete jackass for leaving you and your mom but why do you get so worked up about someone you've never even met? He's not important so stop letting him get to you. He probably doesn't even remember you, so don't let it bother you?" I hated it when he right. When he talks like this, it always makes me look stupid.
"I swear if I ever met him-"
"You'd what? Beat the shit out of him? Ness you're 5 foot 2 and a 100 lbs soaking wet" he joked .
"I can use my smartass mouth !" I joke. Jake chuckles a little. I feel his chest rise and fall as he breathes.
"That you could babe." I feel the smile on his face in his voice. Pride in his girlfriend or humour for my stupidity. Who knows? I'm just glad he finds me so amusing.
"Something funny?" I ask as I take another bite of my juicy apple.
"You of course. My hard headed, strong willed girlfriend." I laugh along with him as he shifts onto his elbows, making me sit up. I stare down at him. Looking at his perfect lips.
"Don't fuck with me Jake or I will kick your ass," I mutter as another wide smile spreads across his face.
"And this is coming from the girl that can't even get a straw into her juice box!" I stare at him and narrow my eyes. Just like mom does.
"Don't start," I sigh, smiling a little sheepishly. I bite my lip trying to stop myself from laughing.
I smile down at him and study his features. His skin in so smooth and his features always look so calm and relaxed. Not a pore, wrinkle , or pimple in sight. He's just so perfect and I know I'm not the only girl that sees it. That's right! I know about all those bitches after my man.
"What?" He chuckles. I blink a few times and break off from my day dream. I smile back at him.
"Nothing just admiring you perfect completion." I put on a fake dreamy voice as well as flutter my eye lashes a few times. Jacob throws his head back as he laughs out loud.
"I am beautiful aren't I?" He asks looking me in the face, raising an eyebrow. We both laugh it off. Leading to complete silence.
"You know I think you're gorgeous Ness." he says, almost a whisper. He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. His index finger then trails down to my bottom lip and then to my neck. He softly pulls my face so that his lips meet mine. Jacob always makes every kiss so special, so delicate but also so perfect. I pull away and lean my forehead against his.
"What with my hazel eyes and my too small of a nose or how my ears are too big and that I have no ass as well as unnaturally big feet."
"You're right I'm dating a freak." He whispers smiling. Wow really Jake you're not supposed to agree with me you asshole.
"You know I'm kidding. Ness you're perfect because of your imperfections!" Jacob whispers close to my face. I breathe in his sweet minty smell.
"I was gunna go to Esme's and get something to eat. You know since there's no food at my house, feel like joining me for breakfast?" I trail of as I move my face around to his cheek. Leaving small trails of kisses from his cheek bone down to his neck.
"Ness baby, please," Jacob muses a little. I bring my face back to his but before I can say something cunning, he wraps his arm around my back. He lays me down and goes on his hands and knees so he's hovering over me in one swift motion.
"Don't do that now unless you want to get into trouble," He says tenderly. I put both of my hands on either side of his face then bring his lips down to mine once more.
"Sorry boss." I murmur against his lips.
"Good girl." He responds then quickly moves of me. The moment is gone. Jacob gets up and then holds his hand out to me. Instead of grabbing his hand like any normal girlfriend would do I jump on his back, getting back into the playful mood that always takes over our relationship .
You'd think that Jacob is a saint. Not likely, we've done it, more than a few times and yeah it's amazing and perfect because Jacob always puts lets my needs before his own . He's nothing but considerate to me while we have sex or in anything else we do but he's always been that way with me even in the beginning, it's like he's perfect. My Jacob, the Jacob I love is perfect to me. He's means everything to me. And then there's the other Jacob that goes out with Sam and his crew. Going out every weekend and getting drunk and smoking weed that's right I know all about it ,I don't mind the drinking I do it every now and again but the weed no way . It's a side to him that I don't want to know about. A person I never want to see.
"You okay up there? You're awfully quiet Ness." Jacob breaks the silence. He continues to carry me through the woods, heading towards the house where Esme and Carlisle lived.
"Yeah I'm fine just thinking, About you and all the stupid shit that u do when you're partying with Sam." I mutter. Jake stops in his tracks and sighs.
"Babe I-"
"Jake I've told you I don't want to hear about it. I hear enough about it at school everyone's always talking about the amazing party that happen over the weekend. where everyone gets so fucked up and that you couldn't even remember your own name. Like I've told you before you can do what you want, you're not my property and I don't own you. But I don't want to hear about your stupidity when you're fucked up and, out with Sam." I rant a little. Jacob doesn't bother to reply, he just starts walking again.
I could smell the delicious odour of Esme's breakfast. I jump off Jake's back and rush in the front door and there it was. The most glorious, mouth-watering breakfast known to man. Well at least known to me and Jake.
"I was wondering when you two were going to show up." Esme smiled lightly as she set out two glasses of orange juice. I take my seat at the table and then dig in. Freshly made scrambled eggs, sausages, hash browns, and toast filled my mouth as well as some bacon.
Jake takes the seat next to me and fills his plate with food. An awkward silence spreads over the room for a while, until Esme breaks the tension.
"So you two okay?" Esme's casual chit chat makes me smile. Always hunting for gossip.
"Yes Esme we're both fine." I smile at her as I finish my food.
"Being safe?" She asks like it was nothing with a delicate raised eyebrow. Jacob chokes on the orange juice he was just drinking. I sigh then roll my eyes.
"How many times do I have to tell you Esme? There are some things that we shouldn't talk about because they're private." I take my plate then place it in the sink before coming and sitting down at the table.
"I know I know. I just, I worry dear that's all. I mean you don't want to follow in your mom's footsteps, you know getting pregnant at sixteen. Please promise me you'll wait." Esme gives me a concerned look as she sips her coffee which makes me smirk a little. I was not as foolish as my mother, Well at least I hope not.
There's nothing to worry about you know I'm not going to be having any babies anytime soon. They're smelly, gross and whiny little things." I scrunch my face up. Esme bites her lip a little as she tries to stop herself from laughing.
"Okay so you love the messy, wet, muddy outdoors but you can't stand babies?" Jacob asks as he looks up from his food.
"You should be happy about that." I say smirking up at him. Jacob coughs to cover up a small laugh.
"I don't know. What am I going to do with you Ness?" Esme sighs a little distantly before she clears up the rest of the plates and cups from the table.
As I get up from the table, I go over to Esme and kiss her cheek.
"I don't know why you worry so much." I mutter as I take an apple then head for the door.
"Because I'm you're granny. It's my job to worry," She says all matter of fact like . I just smile at her before taking Jacobs hand and then leading him out of the house.
"Bye Esme." I shout as I close the door.
Me and Jacob walk in silence back to the meadow. Obviously something's eating at him because he's never usually this quiet. It might just be because he always feels a bit awkward around Esmes and feels intimidated by Carlisle.
Esme doesn't like Jacob. As perfect and beautiful as he is, she still doesn't think I should have a boyfriend. I think that's the main reason anyway. Esme and Carlisle aren't my real grandparents. They've just always been in my life so it's sort of hard to consider them anything but my grandparents. Mom got pregnant at sixteen. Her parents kicked her out and said they didn't want anything to do with her. That they didn't want to have a pregnant teenage daughter to their name, or living in their house. So mom asked Esme and Carlisle If she could live with them. They took her in of course and were more than happy to provide for her. I always wondered why? I mean don't get me wrong, I'm so happy they did and so grateful, but why would they take on a pregnant teen? I mean it's not as though they owed anything to mom or that she was their responsibility. To be honest mom owes them for everything they've done for her and me.
"I'll text you later?" Jacob says brightly, like his mood had lifted. We were standing in our meadow and he was getting ready to go home.
"Okay see you later and, don't get too drunk tonight, please?" I plead with him.
"Okay baby,"
Jacob smiles at me then gives me a quick kiss before jogging in the direction of his house. I stand there and watch him disappear into the woods. Turning on my heel I head in the direction of home.
It was an unusually short journey back to the house and I'm home and in the back door within half an hour of leaving the meadow. I go into the living room and then sink onto the couch. My mind travels back to Jake and the party he was going to tonight.
It's not that I didn't trust Jake. It's his friends that I don't trust. They push him into doing stuff, I just know it. They push him into smoking weed and I know they've tried to push him into the fights that they get in with other people, he never does though. He's not that foolish. He does some of this stuff it because he doesn't want to look like pussy in front of them. He thinks it's a good thing being with them, that they'll help him fit in and be liked. His whole attitude changes with them. He's not my Jacob any more. They're rude, mean and cruel and their bad attitudes have rubbed off on him. Sometimes when he's around me I notice his now harsh tongue, how he's cocky. How he laughs at my shocked face when I can't quite believe what had just come out of his mouth. His humor isn't funny anymore. Its hurtful and when he's drunk he treats people like shit. He laughs at the fucked up, mean, shit his friends do to people who can't defend themselves. Then posts pictures on facebook showing what they've done. It's the weed I tell myself. Really it's him falling into their trap .
"Ness you home?" James calls as he shuts the front door.
"Yeah in here," I yell back. James trots into the room and then sits down on the couch beside me .
James was mom's boyfriend. He Is a little bit younger than her, but that didn't mean he wasn't more mature than she was. Seriously when I say this I mean it; this man is a saint! Without him mom wouldn't have the little bit of responsibility she does. She wouldn't know right from wrong. I like James, he brought security to the house. James has been in our lives for the past five years. We clicked instantly. He's tall with tanned skin. His hair is a sort of natural sandy colour which goes so nicely with his green eyes.
"Did you get it?" I ask him as I sit up and eye the small bag he had placed on the table.
"Yeah want to see?" His half grin was infectious and it made me break out into my own little grin. He grabs the bag and then carefully pulls out the small black box that was inside. Cautiously, like he thinks the little box and what's inside were going to break, he opens it. My grin grows wider. James laughs a little and so do I. I look at the little ring again. It's slim and silver with a small single crystal shaped like a heart on it. Mom's engagement ring.
James left soon after showing me the ring. He got a call from work saying they need him to go in and since he's just brought a pretty pricey ring he figure he needs the money. This means I'm left alone. Again. Summer break is my favorite time of the year, what I hate though is having nothing to do, TV shows and the internet can only go so far. As my mood has been lifted from the previous stupidity of my boyfriend, I decide to get up off my ass go shopping for mom.
Peas, a can of creamy mushroom soup, corn, hamburger meat, mashed potatoes and some cheese. Looks like mom is going to attempt to make shepherd's pie. Again. I think the crappy frozen stuff that the stores make is better than moms cooking.
"Guess who," Hands go over my eyes and I stop mid stride while searching for some bread.
"Jessica maybe?" Giggling starts up behind me and the hands are removed from my eyes. I started to walk along the isles again and she catches up, walking by my side.
"So how's it going chick?" Jess says as she reaches up and grabs some bagels from the top shelf and places the packet in my basket.
"Good, bored. Hey are you going to that party tonight?" I ask casually as I go to the end of the isle and grab some milk from the cooler.
"Yeah, I mean you should tag along! It's not as though you're not invited." Her pleading smile showing at this point, but going to a party is not my intention.
"No that's okay, Just keep an eye on Jake for me? Please?"
"Ness you know there's no stopping him when he's drinking" Jess says straining a little as she reaches across the fruit and veggies counter to grab some bananas.
"Can you at least try?" I beg as I grab some other fruit and pop them into a brown paper bag.
"Ness, I doubt he'll even listen to me, you on the other hand.." She trails of. I sigh then stop to pick up some onions.
"You know I really hate it when you use Jake against me, to get me to do what you want!"
"Does this mean you'll come to the party?" she asks stopping in her tracks and pulling me to face her.
"What time does it start?" I ask giving her a little smirk.
"That's my girl." She giggles lightly. Jess takes my hand and drags me around the rest of the store so I could pick up everything that was on the shopping list. I paid quickly and eventually Jess was dragging me back to my place so she could pick out an outfit for me.
"What do you mean you don't own a dress?" Jess utters with complete disgrace.
"I don't wear dresses," I reply simply as I shut the front door and go into the kitchen to put the groceries away.
"Well, it looks like I have a lot of work to do." Jess mused as she leans against the door frame of my kitchen door. I sag a little, I know I'm in for a rough few hours.
Jess drags me up the stairs into the bathroom and starts a full beauty treatment. She waxed my eyebrows, put some sticky, stinky, gooey tanner all over me and straightened the fuck out of my hair.
"I don't see why you don't do this more often Ness, you look amazing!" Jess breathed as she studied her handy work. I on the other hand felt exposed and awkward standing in the center of my room wearing only my bikini.
"To much work Jess," I smirk as she grants me permission to sit on my bed now that the tan has dried.
"Yes well you need to make an effort to impress my friend," Jess rummages through my makeup bag and set out a row of different coloured foundations.
"You're so lucky you tan easy," She says almost to herself. She picks out the colour that she feels will suit my now bronzed skin and starts her project on my face.
"So how are you and lover boy Is the sex still good?" She asks as she starts to apply eye shadow. I manage to glimpse at her face as she tries to keep in giggles. I pull back and look at her whole face. She smirks a little.
"what do you want me to say Jess? Yes the sex is fucking amazing, but I'm not you okay? Just because I'm comfortable doing it with Jake doesn't mean you automatically have to be with Mike. Okay you need to take your time, I shouldn't have to tell you anything! You will do it when you're ready." I breathe some air into my lungs and look at her with stern eyes.
"Thanks mom," She mutters going back to my eye shadow.
"You know I'm right!" I muse as she finishes one eye and then goes onto the other.
"Yeah and I hate it when you are!" Jess sulks. I smirk up at her. I settle down so she can finish the rest of my makeup. I guess being pampered isn't that bad.
"Okay now time to pick some clothes, I mean you must have something good to wear."
"Good luck," I lie back and close my eyes while she searches through my never ending supply of Jeans. I've just never been one for getting dressed up all slutty like. I'm happy with my jeans and a nice t-shirt or top. Not the standards that my dearest friend has.
"Aha!" She laughs rather excitedly. "What's this black, short, pencil skirt doing in here tucked away missy?" with her eyebrows raised and a small black skirt in her hand Jess turns to face me.
"I don't wear skirts." I say defensively sitting up and trying to look innocent in my skimpy bikini.
"You do now," She laughs, throwing it at me. She then proceeds to throw a small lacy, frilly half top at me that barely covers up my belly.
"I'm not wearing this!" I protest throwing the top back.
"Oh yes you are! Wear it or you don't leave this house alive," She says in a playful threatening tone. I sigh, grab the top and some underwear then trail off into the bathroom to change.
Once I come out I find Jess on the floor straightening her own wavy hair. She really was a piece of work that girl, but she honestly is one of the prettiest girls around. That's not me over exaggerating because I'm her best friend because I know I'm not the only one who feels that way. She has this beautiful, warm smile that reaches all the way up to her beautiful blue eyes. Her skin is just a shade of heaven, it glows with flawlessness, much like Jakes skin there isn't an imperfection in sight. She has the longest pair of freaking legs ever. Jealousy just sweeps over every girl that sees her because even on a bad day Jess can make herself the most desired girl in forks. She's just living proof that pure and true beauty does still exist and it's not just air brushed girls posed all over magazines in revealing clothes that is a symbol of beauty today.
"What do you think?" I ask posing like one of those air brushed models on a billboard, looking into the distance as if I'd just seen the most amazing thing ever.
"Aha, look at you! Do you feel good? I bet you do! See getting dressed up and looking nice is good sometimes!" The quick motion of her mouth almost blended her words into a mush of gibberish because she was talking so fast. She was right though, I did feel nice.
"okay, We're all done here! You just put those nice black pumps on and we'll get our little asses over to my house so I can get ready." She packs up my stuff, while leaving me to look at the fucking heel on those shiny shoes. Shoes I hid at the back of my closet for a reason.
"Come on, put them on," Jess pushes as she grabs her coat from my bed then goes to my closet and picks out a jacket for me. I moan bitterly to myself as I slip on the shoes.
I thank the heavens as Jess' dad pulls up outside my house so we don't have to walk. Since I'm seriously unstable in these shoes. "You'll get better!" Jess keeps saying to me as she holds me up so I don't fall on my ass. I allow Jess to walk out of my room and reach the top of the stairs before I call back and say I need the bathroom. Jess, sighs and huffs then whines a little about how she didn't want to be late. I don't care. I just need some flat shoes for a little bit of reassurance. So I scuttled over to the closet and took out a plain pair of black, flat shoes and slip them into my bottomless bag. I hated parties and I hate ridiculous shoes that girls wear to parties. I practically flop on my bed as I tried to avoid tripping over the numerous amount of clothes that lay scattered all over my floor. Who said girls were tidy? Obviously not me. I pull myself together, breath in and then will myself to be confident. I can walk in these shoes and completely own this stupid outfit. Hopefully I can look sexy while doing it. Hopefully.
Twenty minutes. Twenty minutes it took me to get down those stairs in those stupid shoes.
"See I told you you'll-"
"Jess shut up."
Jess pushes her mouth in a hard but delicate line and then helps me down the last stair. I smooth down my clothes hair and then smile. No broken bones. Now I just have to defeat those stairs going down from my front door.
"Ness, I think you should take those shoes off," Jess says. I look at her with a raised eyebrow.
"For the safety of everyone at that party, take those shoes off and burn them!" she mutters before heading back up the stairs.
"Where are you going?" I call with my brow furred. Slowly but surely I sit my ass down on the bottom stair and take of the demons from below.
"Now these are what a clumsy starter needs like you Ness," I look up to see Jess smoothly come down the stairs with a pair of high heeled shoes with a smaller heal on them. They had straps that go around the ankle. At least these won't come of my feet.
"And where did you get those, they certainly aren't mine."
"Your mom's room," I stare at her, almost shocked at the audacity she had.
"Jess if they break I might as well not come home."
"You're moms not wearing them and therefore will not miss them, put them on and hurry up, I actually want to get too this party sometime today."
Her small ass wiggled as she trotted out the door. I look at my feet and wiggle my toes. Much better. I can stand and walk around, maybe even look half decent in these shoes. Grabbing my black blazer off one of the coat hook I proceed to walk out the door. Heal toe, heal toe. See this isn't that bad.
Being extremely thankful for the shoe change I climb into Mr Stanley's car. I felt over exposed and embarrassed to sit next to Jess who was still modestly dressed. I couldn't meet her father's eyes.
"Have you ever been to a party before?" Jess asked breaking the awkward silence with a dumb question.
"Yes." As the designated driver. Sober friend
"Have you ever got drunk?"
"Jess?" I whisper looking at her with desperation too not do this here while her dad was sitting the front seat.
"Well?" She smiled at me easily. Obviously she wasn't getting the awkwardness of this, or maybe she was trying to make me uncomfortable. I roll my eyes at her persistent face then shake my head yes. A smirk took over her face and then she sat back facing straight ahead. No ten minutes have ever been so awkward and tense, the fear that Mr Stanley was going too just stop the car and tell me to get out over the conversation hovered in my mind. So when we pulled up outside Jess' house I was ever so thankful. She got out first and ran too her house, no doubt she already had the perfect outfit planned out in her head already. Ten minutes she said she would be. Ten minutes of awkward silence waiting for her in the car, with her dad.
"Don't let her, or anyone push you into drinking tonight Ness," He said completely out of the blue in a voice that sounded almost muffled.
"I, uh, I won't," I say with a small smile, in which he returned. We both then proceeded to look out of a car window. Raindrops started to appear.
"All ready?" Mr Stanley asked as Jess slipped into the car wearing the shortest, silver, strapless dress I've ever seen. She compliment it with a black blazer of her own and high heels that were twice the size of mine.
"I swear," Her dad muttered. "Anyone would think you were twenty one not sixteen."
We were dropped off at the party. I had no idea whose house it was, but it was big. Easily seven bedrooms if not more. What an elegant house to be ruined by a party with a shit load of drunk teenagers. Myself and Jess walked into the open front door. Instantly I was hit by the loud music and smell of alcohol. Already there looked like there had been a fight since a table lay broken in two with bits of glass and china scattered around it. Jess grabbed a boy by his arm and asked him what had happen.
"Just a drunken fight, one guy threw a cup of beer at another dude, so he grabbed him and smashed him into the table," His eyes trailed from Jess too me and his lips curved into a one sided cocky smile.
"Hey you," Jess clicked her fingers in front of his face. "She's spoken for,"
"Oh, so anyway, do you want to get a drink?" He asked Jess as he leaned against the door frame. That cocky grin coming onto his face again.
"In your dreams loser."
Jess pulled me past him. We managed to slide our way out into the yard where even more people were drinking and making out. I want to go home. Shouting came from our left and both of us turned. There on the diving board that was above the swimming pool was Jake. Standing on wobbly legs, with a drink in his hand edged closer to the end of the board.
"Back flip," Started out as a mere yell and then turned into a chant. Before I could protest or even shout at him, Jake up was doing a back flip into the pool. My heart launched out of my chest. What if he did it wrong or missed the pool. But he didn't. His head surfaced and with an almighty 'WOOO' from Jacob's lips, cheering, laughing and clapping erupted from the crowd .
Relief swept over me and I found myself clapping and laughing too. Jake dragged himself out of the pool. He pulled off his top revealing his six pack. Girls giggled and clapped and then I saw her. Lucy Jones. Slut, tramp and Jacob hunter. She bit her lip and looked at him in that hot Smokey way that gets her laid whenever she wants. She started to strut towards him. I looked at Jess, Jess looked at me. She pushed me towards Jacob. I started to walk fast and confident too Jake so that Lucy wouldn't be able to. Just as she was nearing behind him, I grabbed Jake's face and brought him into a kiss. His arms went to my waist. As always, making butterflies rise in my belly. He broke of the kiss then looked at me and smiled.
"You're all wet," Was the first thing that I could manage too say. I was cold and my feet were already hurting.
"And you look hot,"
"Surprise," I bit my lip and turn around in a small circle. Showing him how little of an outfit I had on.
"Let me just go get dry or something and then I'll come find you." He said giving me a small peck on the cheek before wandering off into the house.
Smiling secretly to myself I looked around for Jess. My brain was screaming at me to be mature about this and not get caught up in this party, but I couldn't help it.
"Well don't you look cheap."
"And how many times have you been pregnant?" The smartass tone in my voice was perfect as I turned slowly around to face Lucy. Her long legs were on full show as she was wearing a small blue dress that barely covered her breasts. She had a nice face. It would probably look nicer if it wasn't so caked in makeup.
"Says the sad little virgin." Her fake laugh matched her fake, pathetic smile.
"Well compared too you everyone's a virgin," I said as I started to stare at a blatant orange spot on her face.
"What are you staring at?" She demanded putting her nasty little hand on her stupid hip.
"The orange spot on your face bitch. You know I bet I could literally scratch the makeup off your face," turning and walking away I had a smile of triumph on my face. I had no idea where I was going so I just wandered into the house, hoping that there was something to drink besides alcohol. I fumbled through two rooms before I came to the kitchen. Before I could go in however someone caught my arm.
"And where are you going?" Jake said with a smile in his voice. He was wearing a new pair of shorts with flip-flops, his chest however stayed bare.
"Looking for you, and a soda." I say as he claimed my waist with his big strong arms. In return I put my hands on his chest.
"So are you drinking tonight?"
"And who gave you that silly idea?" I laughed.
"Come on Ness live a little," I looked at his pleading eyes and knew I had already given in.
"Fine,"
Jake smiles at his little triumph and drags me into the kitchen. Taking two cans from the fridge he opens them both and pushes one into my hand.
Throughout the night various drinks and shots were pushed into my hand in which I started to consume willingly. I hadn't planned on it but I was pretty sure I was drunk. I would not however let Jake go anywhere without me, I couldn't risk a drunk Jacob running into a long-legged Lucy.
"And this must be the legendary Nessie," A mystery guy from behind me said. Before I had even turned fully too face him, he had already pushed a can of beer into my hand.
"And you are?"
"Well I'm sure my boy here has told you all about me?" He slapped Jake's back in a friendly manner.
"oh let me see the one and only Sam ?" I ask with sarcasm. He wasn't what I had imagined, he wasn't big and strong. Just tall with broad shoulders.
"Yeah you enjoying the party?" Obviously he missed the sarcasm all together.
"I was," I muttered.
"What was that supposed to mean?" He almost looked hurt. I was feeling confident I didn't know if it showed it on my drunk face but I didn't care. I stepped forward so that I was in front him and then smiled.
"I don't like you," I say out loud as I tap a finger on his nose.
"Wow you really are an ugly looking fella aren't you?" I was talking but there was no thinking process into the words I was speaking. Still I carried on.
"How many girls have you fucked and then left, never too call them again? Too many I assume. I'm hoping that Jake has more sense than to follow in the path of an idiot like you. Hope someone knocks you on your ass so maybe then you'll know how it feels to be pushed around. To be honest Sam, you're really not a nice person."
Jake pulled me away from Sam's shocked face. I could feel the genuine smile on mine as Jacob turned me too face him.
"Now I see why you don't drink." He muttered.
My head was thumping, after that last shot I was pretty sure I blacked out. I can remember climbing on the kitchen counter, probably screaming something unrecognizable while the crowd chanted for me to drink more.
I sat on a bed in a bedroom on the third floor. It was nice and warm. The room was painted a shade of cream that made me want to throw up.
"I came here too look out for you," I mutter as Jake hands me a cup of water and then goes to the bedroom door and locks it. He sits down next to me, cuddling in close.
"But look at me I'm a light weight."
"No you're just having fun. Even though I've had to drag you around to keep you out of trouble it's been nice seeing you smile and be all care free! You should be like this more." Jake smiles at me and I smile at him back.
"Maybe I'll come too more parties with you, but keep the drinking to a minimum." I laugh lightly. Jake pulls me into a small kiss. His tender lips part from mine and just as they do I rest my forehead against his. His hands go too my waist. The skin on skin contact makes me shiver with delight. I place one hand on his head and let it get tangled in his hair while my other hand still holds the cup of water.
He reaches forward once again pressing his lips too mine. This time I keep his lips, claiming them. Jake takes the water from me and throws the paper cup to the floor. I hear the water splash all over the fluffy carpet, but I don't care. The only thing that seemed too matter was him and I.
His hands waste no time and go to the hem of my top. With one smooth motion he'd taken the top over my head and was pulling me into his lap.
It felt so good to straddle his lap and be dominant. He let my lips trail from his so that I could kiss his sweet neck. Slowly I made my way from the bottom of his neck to his ear and start to nibble on it a bit. His breathing quickened and his hands started to trail along my legs.
"I want you," Those three words coming from my mouth. They were enough to throw him of the edge.
Jacob picked me up, all the while kissing me again. He laid me on the bed and set himself on top of me. No weight however was pushed onto me. Jacob's quick movements had already taken my bra, skirt and now my panties. With shaky hands of excitement I push down his boxers and the shorts that he had borrowed. Leaving him naked.
I scratch his back with utter pleasure as he enters me.
Jake kisses me tenderly, we lay in the big double bed all cuddled up. It was nice until a series of loud banging started coming from the other side of the door.
"Ness? Are you in there? Get your ass out here now." Fuck Mom. Grumbling I get out of bed quickly and retrieve all my clothes then slip them on.
"Shit is that your mom should I like hide in the bathroom or something?" I just look at him and roll my eyes, suddenly I didn't feel so good.
"No Jake she's not stupid she knows you're in here as well." More banging came from the door, it vibrated in my head giving me a migraine.
"Stop your freaking banging, I'm coming now." That of course was not enough for my mother since the door smacked open, hitting the wall with a nasty bang.
"Out, now." She was keeping her temper at bay, as a very startled and naked Jacob looked at her with utter shock and embarrassment. I walked out of the room, trying to keep my head down. Everything was silent. Smirking and laughing started up from all angles of the halls as I walked after my mom .
"Busted, you little bitch." Sam's voiced roared over the crowd and then of course laughter erupted. I scrambled quicker after my mom and out into the cold.
"No phone call, no fucking text ness, what the hell is wrong with you?" She shouted. Still not out of ear shot from the surrounding party who had followed us out.
"You could have called, or maybe asked Jess' dad, I mean he dropped me off mom.
"I couldn't get hold of anyone that knew where you were! I got home and the damn house was empty Ness, do you know how worried I was? or Esme and Carlisle?"
"Sorry, it's not as though I wasn't safe." By now her face was red. She had stormed over to the car, motioned for me to get in with one finger and then got in herself. The buzz must be making me brave.
"It's not the fact that you were at a party. Or even that you were drinking. Okay, it was that I had no idea where you were! You weren't picking up the phone Ness." Suddenly I felt weak and sick. I was suddenly in no mood to argue my case.
"Alright calm down." I mumble.
"You know what. You're grounded. I fucking hate this attitude on you and quite frankly you will learn. I'm sure in the morning you'll be doing nothing but apologizing." That was the end of the conversation. I couldn't argue, I felt sick and I just really wanted my bed.
Taking comfort in the ice cold windows that my head was leaning against I tried to not throw my guts up. It didn't work.
Just before we rounded the corner to our street, I opened the door and threw up. Mom had to stop the car suddenly and cursed at me for giving her no warning and for being stupid.
"You'd prefer me to throw up in your car?" I ask angrily as I stomp up to the front door. James opens it before I can knock. I knew that he was going to give me a lecture and I was in no mood. So I push past him rather rudely and say "don't even fucking bother."
I needed alone time with my bed. So as soon as I get to my room I lock my door. Being drunk and naturally clumsy didn't do wonders for me and so as I tried getting dressed into my PJ's I stumbled across my room knocking things over.
"Ness keep it down." My mom's voice came from the bottom of the stairs With Irritation in her voice.
Hairband. I need a freaking hairband. In search of a hairband to tie back the ridiculous amount of hair in my head, I decide to look in my mom's box in my bathroom. There it was a picture of a young man with a younger mom she looked about my age. They looked happy, young and care free, but his eyes, they look just like mine. It was him. I hated him, why the fuck did she have this? Why the fuck is this in my bathroom? Before I could stop myself I had grabbed the nail scissors that were on the side and proceeded to viciously cut up the picture. The boy's face was now just ribbons on the floor of a photo that used to be.
I went to bed angry that night. Angry at everything. Everyone. Angry at him.
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