Hello.
This is my second attempt at writing a McRoll fiction. You can consider it as a sequel of my first one called "Princess". The idea came to me when it's raining so hard outside and suddenly I realized it was July 7th (according to Lunar Calendar) - The Chinese Valentine's Day; and I remember there was a beautiful story behind that day. I read it for so many times when I was a little girl.
I don't know if you guys think McRoll in this fiction are a bit out of character or not (because their lines were written pretty long); but in my opinion, their phone calls were made at midnight - that was the time when people are in the most vulnerable state in a day, so they let it all out loud without holding back anything.
And I want to shout out a special THANK YOU to one of my favorite McRoll fellows: Rosies (Rodanthi Syrigou). Thank you for always being so supportive and for encouraging me all the time. Thank you for your nice words about "Princess". I feel really honored and proud.
And another THANK YOU goes to the beautiful soon-to-be bride (jayeannekylie). Thank you for helping me out by revising my work extremely carefully (Honestly I didn't expect that you would be THAT dedicated haha). And thanks a bunch for complimenting my work :P
Sorry for rambling!
Thanks for reading and hope you will enjoy the story! I'd really appreciate if you guys could take time leaving a comment.
Disclaimer: All rights reserved for CBS and the managing team of Hawaii 5-0.
Happy belated Chinese Valentine's Day!
Hawaii. August 2nd.
It had been around three months since Catherine's birthday. So because of that, it's been a while since she last called. There was not a single day going by that Steve didn't think about Catherine. In fact, sometimes the team accidentally run into Steve checking the flight schedules of the route from Hawaii to Afghanistan. They knew he would never get rid of the idea of coming back to find her and bring her home. He tried his best to restrain himself from revealing any obvious sign that he's affected by her decision, but even Jerry noticed Steve missed her like crazy.
Four months without any phone call really scared him to death. Every now and then, he thought about the worst possibility of her... not making it back to him. But then, he immediately got rid of that thought. It hurt so much to think something bad happened to her. That has been the worst nightmare that he had since he became a SEAL. She was the bravest and strongest girl he had ever met in his life. She could do it, and he wholeheartedly trusted her. A part of him wanted to wait for her forever, but another part of him just wanted to fly over half of the world tonight, to come to give her a hand, to fight with her.
But that definitely was not something Catherine wanted him to do.
Afghanistan's border. August 3rd.
Sitting in her small shelter, Catherine kept staring at her cell phone. Tomorrow was going to be a big day, a very important day, considering she had a solid lead of the whereabouts of Najib. All of her hard work over the last few months would totally depend on tomorrow. There would be two possibilities: She would win big time, or she was going to die. And the second one was not a choice she would accept.
Over the last three months, Catherine didn't call Steve, no matter how much she wanted to hear his voice, or to ever to feel his comfort even when he was so far away from her. Sometimes she sent him texts, just to make sure she's alright. Though there was one thing she knew for sure: There was no way to keep Steve calm while she's alone here. It's way too dangerous and he knew it. It's not like he underestimated her ability. It's more like he really considered the situation in a professional way. Even Catherine knew this mission was like a suicide mission.
Didn't want to waste time thinking too much, Catherine grabbed the phoned and dialed his familiar phone numbers. She thought about that certain telephone number every day, as this series catered her some unbelievable comfort, gave her strength, and reminded her that she needed to be extremely careful all the time to be able to come back to him - in a whole.
It must be pretty late in Hawaii, almost mid-night again, but it didn't take long until Steve picked up his phone. Hearing him, even just a normal simple word "Hello?", made her heart jump. Her lips curved into a light smile as she heard his sleepy voice. She imagined Steve's hilarious face as she almost forgot to respond to his answer.
Steve checked the ID caller on his phone after he didn't hear any sound coming from the other end. It's Catherine. He couldn't sleep anymore (as if he was actually sleeping. Not at all). "Catherine Catherine Catherine", three times of saying her name out loud was the only respond he could manage to do. He just wanted to say her names over and over again, to realize how close she was. She was right there, on the other end of the line. So close, yet so far away.
"Yeah it's me. It's probably 12PM there. Are you sleeping? Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up!" She giggled as she realized she was rambling.
"No, I'm not sleeping. Just thinking over several things. I'm waiting for you to call every day. But it seems like you're too lazy for that."
"Sorry about that", Catherine smiled, wondering if Steve knew how much relieved he sounded. She just wished after tomorrow, she could actually hear his voice again, with much more relief than he was at this very moment. This would be mean her mission would be completely succeeded.
"Catherine, I told you "I love you", but have I ever told you HOW MUCH I love you?"
"Steve, I know. I understand... You don't need to..."
"Don't interrupt me, please, Catherine. Because sometimes I think I haven't expressed myself enough. If you think I'm able to move on without you, then you're very wrong."
"For God's sake, Steve, what the hell are you talking about? I haven't said anything yet. I don't call to break up with you, or anything like that. Steve..."
Steve's absolutely silence within a few seconds really made Catherine worried. Officially worried. She waited patiently, she has no intention this call was going to end soon. There were so many things need to be told.
"I'm sorry. It's just I had a bad day. I'm a mess. I miss you. And when you called, for God's sake Catherine, after three months, three months, I automatically assumed that you wanted me to move on. Tons of people gave me such kind of advice, if you call them "advice", which I totally disagree. I'm sick of it. I just don't want to hear it coming from your mouth... Just so you know, I'm waiting for you, so it'd be better if you can bring your ass back here, you know..."
"I made a promise to be careful, and I'm going to do it. I know it's too much to ask you to not worry, but I'm extremely, incredibly careful on every move I make, so... Steve, can you trust me?"
"I trust you. I've always trusted you."
"Thanks. Actually tomorrow will be a big day. It's now or never... I just want to receive a "Good luck" from you. It's kinda funny because the last time I begged for a "Good luck" from a boy was when I was in high school. And that "boy" was actually my father. Is it too childish that I'm asking that from you, now?"
He ignored her question about if she's too childish or not, just quietly answered "Good luck, Cath.". If he had to use one single adjective to describe her, "stubborn" would always be his choice, instead of "childish". If only she could be childish, so that she could need some protection from some prince charming. Oh, his mind actually came back to the "princess and prince" topic, which was the topic they talked about last time she called. He must be so close to Joan lately, that thought lightened up Steve a bit. "And I should be the childish one here. From what I remember, when I was still a SEAL, every time I was about to enter a dangerous classified mission, I called you, begging for some "Good luck" from you. Actually I just wanted to hear your voice, to remind myself that I had some place to return... And I always consider it extremely lucky if we could catch up to do something at night" - His voice was full of teasing. "And you were always making me to make a promise... And..."
"Steve, I promise, I will be careful. I will be careful". She completed his thought, and even said that phrases twice, to make sure that would be exactly what she's gonna do. Being careful, so that she could return to him, so that he won't have to move on without her. She remembered exactly how she felt when she made him make that promise. The situation was reserved now.
"That's exactly what I need to hear right now. Catherine, I love you. I really do. Just remember that. And this is not goodbye. I will call you tomorrow to see..."
The tiny pump was drumming hard in her chest as if it were trying to jump out. Him saying out loud "I love you" always affected her incredibly - in a good way. Being able to hear those three words from the man you admire and love so much was something that none of the girl would ever refuse.
"Steve, you don't seem like yourself today. You don't seem to be drunk, but... I don't know, it's just weird. Are you okay? Really okay?"
"It's Valentine today, Catherine". His voice echoed to her ears, didn't sound like he was joking.
Her face scrunched a little: "What? What are you talking about? I'm pretty sure we were literally together last Valentine. And I still remember what you did to me on that very night." She blushed a bit at the thought of that night - "Do I miss something, or are you so sleepy that you make it up? I know I don't check calendar regularly, but I'm positive it's already August."
"You have a moment? Or do you have to prepare for tomorrow? Can we talk?"
"Absolutely. There's a reason I called you. I need some kind of reassurance from you. And don't worry, I already ran a blue light and conduct a detailed plan with a fine-tooth comb before I called you. Got nothing to do from now but waiting. So I'm all ears."
"You probably don't know that today is Chinese Valentine's Day. I know, it has nothing to do with us, but I've just heard about it and its original story this afternoon, it's really touching, and I can't stop myself from thinking about us. Considering how much you love corny stories, I suppose you're gonna love this."
"Enlighten me!", she felt amazing when she heard his sarcasm over the last sentence. Yeah. He's obsessed with the fact she had a soft spot for "The Notebook".
"Yesterday we run into a case. The main suspect was a Chinese man. He was claimed to steal a great deal of money from the company he's working at as a treasurer. The case was more complicated than that, but I'm gonna just focus on the main point. He went to the trouble trying to come back to China, and we caught him at the airport. When we interrogated him in the blue room, he told us he just wanted to come back to China for 2 days, because August 02 was Valentine's Day, and he wanted to spend that time with his longtime girlfriend. I didn't believe him at first, I thought he was telling lies, but when I looked into his eyes, there was something really familiar to me. It's love, Cath. His devastated state really sold me. He kept a picture of him and his girlfriend in his wallet. Our team thought I was crazy because I spent this afternoon listening to his story, while other evidences were way too obvious to convict his crime."
She noticed the way Steve considered Five-0 as "our team". She still was a part of the team, which was so heart-warming. "Okay", she silently replied. She didn't understand what Steve tried to say, but she knew it's important, so she listened closely. She wouldn't rush him, because he would eventually share his thoughts with her on his own time. She felt his need to talk to her, and she needed that as much as he did.
"To us, today is August 2nd, but in the lunar calendar of Chinese people, today is the seventh day of the seventh month - and it is Chinese Valentine's Day. 2014 is year of Horse. In Chinese horoscopes, the year of Horse is a romantic year. In addition, the month of Chinese Valentine's Day is Sheep and the August 2nd is a Snake day. When Horse, Sheep and Snake together, they have attraction relationship into Fire. Fire is connected to hot and love. This would be a special day for people who have been in love. It's a meaningful day, Cath. There's also a very beautiful story behind it."
"You know I'm a sucker for love stories. As I said earlier, I'm in no rush and I have time. So I'm eager to hear."
"Let me tell you. This festival originated from the romantic story between the seventh daughter of Emperor of Heaven - who had just escaped from boring heaven to look for fun, and an orphaned cowherd. That was love at first sight, they fell madly in love and got married after a while without the knowledge of the Goddess. Their love was forbidden, because technically a fairy girl was not allowed to marry to mere mortal, thus they were banished to opposite sides of the Silver River or the Milky Way, I don't know. They had to see each other from long distance, which was, I understand, a painful thing; and were allowed to meet only once a year on the day of 7th day of the 7th lunar month. On this very day, the magpies in the world were moved by their true love and took pity on them, so that they flied up into heaven to form a bridge to reunite the lovers for a single night. It was said that if it rains on this day, it would be the tears of the separated couple."
Catherine was barely breathing, and her heart was melting after hearing the story. "Steve, you are such a softie. You should write this story down and read that to Joan some day. She will be thrilled to hear that from her softie uncle. It's a beautiful story. I heard that before, while my father was stationed in Hongkong, but I was a little girl and didn't pay much attention at that time." She whispered as tears flooded her eyes. Maybe she wouldn't be this emotional if she heard this from another source, but this was Steve telling her. That's all that mattered.
That fact touched her the most. His voice touched her the most.
Steve continued. His voice was now a mere whisper: "You know what, it's pretty ridiculous that I buy this story, but everyone has their own belief. I believe in Hawaiian mythical legendary stories as well. We manage to clear his name right after we solve the case, but until then, he is not going back to China. And it nearly passed the Valentine's Day in China... I feel bad about it, because I understand his feelings right now. I mean, not be able to be by his girl's side on a very important day really sucks. The least thing I could do for him was allow him to make a phone call to his girlfriend in China. I gave him fifteen minutes. Fifteen minutes will never be enough, but I tried my best. Trust me, if HPD knows about this, they will not simply let it slide."
"It is very nice of you. But I know you, so I'm not surprised. I prefer this softer side of you."
"Catherine, I feel so lonely tonight". His voice suddenly became so emotional. She could tell his body was tense just by listening to his voice. She could literally see his sad and lonely face, and feel his heartbeat echoing through the phone line.
"Steve, is it a sign to...?"
"No no no no. Absolutely not. Don't think I'm gonna give up on you that easily. I'm just saying. I'm tired of being strong on the outside. I fucking hate the sympathetic gazes people give me every day. It's like they think of me as a son of the bitch who cares only about sex and I'm gonna die if I don't have sex regularly. It's not true, Catherine. We lived this life before, we were separated before. Separation has never been a challenge to me, to us. I can handle it. The hard thing is I don't know if you're safe or not, the hardest thing is I can't protect you or give you my support from here."
"Steve, it's not their fault to worry about you. They are your friends and they care about you. And you thinking about me, about us... already means so much. That's all I need". Catherine knew Steve was feeling guilty. Maybe he was thinking it's always him calling her for favors after those years, she risked her career to help him out, now it's supposed to be his turn, but he was feeling helpless when she was out there, being in over her head, alone. To be honest, she hasn't blamed him for just one second. He already did whatever he could. He almost lost his life trying to protect her. There was no way she could let him come back here and lost everything he fought for in this whole Navy career.
His voice was low and intense, and she could tell he almost flew off the handle. "I do not need their care. I'm sick of it. I know they have good intention, but it's just wrong every time they try to set me up with another girl. You know, the guy in the Chinese story I've just told you, has lived on his own for the rest of his life, doing his job, taking care of their children. His only desire was to meet his wife on July 7th. I think he's still happy - on his own way, which people will never understand. He lives his life on 364 days of the year, but lives happily on that very Valentine's day. He's happy because he has something to lean on, to look forward to. I don't find anything wrong with that. I just wish people would respect my choice." A deep and shaky breath escaped from him, and she could hear a shaky laugh from the other end. His voice was raw, wounded, and she wish she could tell him something or do something to take some of the pain away from him. "And my choice is waiting for you, giving you my total support, even just in a mental way. I feel so lonely, even among all the people I love and respect. It's just not the same without you. People asked if I'm okay every day, but I hate looking into their eyes. It's different when you're here. You don't need to say anything, I don't need to say anything, but we perfectly understand each other."
When people looked at his relationship, they always assumed that it's always Catherine who did all the talking, and Steve would be the one always listening, because he wasn't like the type of guy enjoying talking. But it's kinda the other way around. In this relationship, Steve only felt completely safe when he shared every thoughts with her. She was truly his own shrink, his personal therapist. Talking to her made everything better. He had nothing to hide, especially at night, when he didn't have to keep his guard up. He just hoped Catherine would understand what he was trying to say.
Catherine was about to argue with Steve, because she knew that was not healthy to think the way he was thinking, but she decided to keep silent. What if this was their last phone call... What if she would never to be able to call him again after tomorrow... The last thing she would do was to argue with her man over the phone. She just wanna cherished every moment on this phone call.
Tears were flowing from her eyes when she imagined the worst possibility. She had determination, but this suicide mission was no way near the word "easy". She finally managed to softly ask him: "Steve. What have I done in my life to deserve such a faithful man like you?"
"By being you - Awesome Catherine, my own princess. And because I'm your man, I will be the famous Prince Charming. Wow, I like that", his voice came back to teasing voice. He must have spent so much time with Joan on weekends. Catherine knew he just tried to act in a relaxing way, so that she would not worry about him.
They really read each other really well in all situations.
The tenderness in his voice brought her out of her reverie. She smiled slightly, only heard sincerity from those words. He had not even been the master of words, but somehow he always managed to say words that made her heart jump desperately.
The line was absolutely silent for several seconds, yet it was a comfortable silence.
"I have something really interesting for you."
"Let me hear you sing another Chicago song?", she raised her voice, teasing him. Steve wasn't drunk tonight so of course, he's not gonna do it.
"Very funny. Actually better than that. Listen to this."
Steve turned on his record file and a baby soothing voice came up. "Auntie Cath...eri... Auntie Cath...erine.. Auntie Catherine". That was Joan's voice. Catherine had not been very close to that baby, but hearing such a cute voice really cracked her up.
"It's really cute, Steve. Totally makes my day. How is she?"
"She's good. Such a good baby. I managed to change her diapers by myself, twice, didn't even need help from Chin. Mission completed. I'm confident being a dad now." Steve laughed so relaxingly. He replayed the record and boasted: "See, I told you. I trained her."
"Steve, you do aware she's just a baby, right? And being a dad takes more than just changing diapers, Sailor! Does she even know how to say Mommy, Uncle or Grandma yet? With this kind of training, I bet when she grows up, Catherine will be the word she hates the most."
"No way. That's not gonna happen. Perfect pronunciation, right, right?"
"Very nice. Proud Uncle right there. Very cute, both of you. I like it. Tell her Aunty Catherine want to meet her and hold her. Send her my kiss, okay?"
"What about me?", he laughed, pretending to sulk.
"I'm emailing you my kiss right now."
"You're on. If I check my email and don't find any kissing email, I'm gonna find you and give you the punishment you deserve. You hear me?"
"Aye aye, Commander". It felt so good to have a light moment during the phone call.
"By the way, I flew into mainland last month and visited your parents. They both were holding up pretty well, but I know they've missed you so much, Cath. Then your mom was hell-bent on visiting me last weekend. I felt so grateful. She just wanted to see our house, to see the place you had lived last year. It's pretty quiet and cold without you, and your mother noticed that. I can see how devastated she was... She cooked me dinner. Her Ragu was great, but it tasted different than yours. And she also made me sushi, she told me that was your favorite food. She told me lots of your childhood stories. Stubborn baby Rollins. Very impressive."
"Thank you so much for visiting her, Steve. I gave my dad a buzz over the months, but we didn't talk much. He didn't tell me off, he was just... sad, you know. He told me I was doing the right thing, and he totally understood that. I didn't dare to talk to my mom, because if I did, I would never have the strength to stay here. I felt like I'm suck at being a good daughter. I left people who love me behind to go after the boy I barely know about..."
"It's a great sacrifice. It's all about the honor. I admire and love you for that. So do your parents. Never question yourself or your decision, okay? I trust you, so you also should trust yourself."
"Steve..." Her hesitation immediately raised his concern. The realization of what she was going to say hit him hard. "Steve, I have a favor. If anything happens to me..."
"No, don't say that. It's your job to take care of them. You are your parents' angel, not me. I promise you, I'm gonna look after them like they are my own parents, just until you get back here."
"Thank you. I appreciate it". She giggled, thought about the time he asked her to take care of Doris. Speaking of Doris, it's until now she totally understood Doris's choice. Sometimes people had to sacrifice for the greater good, even if it's not the way they wanted to be. Leaving your family for 20 years had to be so painful, especially for a woman.
"And they will be my parents... One day...". His voice was so soft that she could barely hear. But she heard it anyway. Her heart couldn't stop beating so fast, her heartbeat picked up significantly and her smile was so obvious. It felt like a dream, and she found herself barely breathing.
Steve heard her unsteady breath. He didn't even realize he was holding his own breath while he waited for her to say something in respond. He suddenly found himself sitting upright instead of leaning the headboard. Her pillow was hugged so tightly in his arms. There was an inner voice inside his head yelling: "Say something, Catherine, say something."
"I'll be waiting for that day to come."
They both laughed, in harmony. There were tears somewhere in their faces.
"I wish you still were in the Navy."
"I know, yes, I really miss being your personal assistant."
"Very funny, Rollins. Come back here, I will promote you. Just so you know I'm a very commanding Commander. It's not like everyone can earn that title."
The little teasing going on between them really lightened up the moment. They both wanted to treasure every moment they were having. Suddenly, Steve heard Catherine's astonishing voice. He couldn't register from her soft voice right away... whether it's a good or bad thing.
"Steve, it's raining here. It's the first time I saw the rain since I got here. Unbelievable."
"Oh I'm so sorry to hear. Will the rain affect any part of your plan?", Steve's thought immediately jumped into her tomorrow plan. He sounded so worried.
"I don't think it's gonna last that long. I have more 12 hours. But my point is... it's raining... on the so-called Chinese Valentine's Day. I didn't believe in such legendary stories, but what could I tell now? It's amazing. Maybe it's a good sign..."
"It's raining here as well. Actually, it has been raining for the whole evening. Chinese people believe they are "The tears of separated and reunited couple", you know..."
"The tears of separated and reunited couple", She repeated after him. "I love it."
"So I wish you luck. Good luck, Cath!" A deep sigh managed a way to escape from his lips. He didn't want to end it so quickly, but considering the whole situation, hearing her voice and telling her story about this Chinese Valentine's Day already meant so much. He had nothing to regret.
"So good night, Steve..."
"Good night, Catherine..." This time he had no intention to hang up on her first.
"Okay. Good night then."
"Good night.", Steve actually bursted into laughing to see Catherine repeating herself. Seeing her like that was so enjoyable.
"Steve, I love you."
With that, she finally hang up on him, before receiving reaction from him. He might grin like an idiot now, but she doubted that. Maybe he would stay dumbfounded for seconds, trying to figure out a reasonable way to react. She had to switch off her phone, because she's afraid that she would call him again just to hear his voice, again and again and again, to hear him saying those three words with her one more time. Sometimes, it's just so hard to realize they were half the world apart, let alone for almost half a year.
Looking outside at the rain, she couldn't restrain herself from smiling. All of a sudden, all of her fears when it came to tomorrow magically disappeared.
Seeing the rain after hearing the story gave her faith, strength to continue to do her job, even though she hadn't been a big believer in God or Jesus or some supernatural power like that. But everything just came to her at the right time. The thought of that just boosted her confidence and determination. She would do everything in her power to rescue Najib tomorrow, and then made it back to Steve safely.
That would be the happy ending of their own fairy tale. One day, when they would have kids, she would make sure they would tell their children those stories.
Catherine just hoped that day would eventually come.
Tomorrow was going to be an extremely long day.
Hawaii.
Steve rubbed his eyes. He had bags under his eyes and they were red. And he knew he would not to be able to sleep tonight. He could feel nothing but fear. Exactly like the day Catherine was kidnapped, like when she insisted on going with him to North Korea, or like the moment she told him she needed to go to Afghanistan, or like the second she hit him with her decision that she wouldn't come back unless she found Najib. Steve didn't feel this kind of fear before his mission, even before the most dangerous, classified one. But whenever it came to Catherine, it automatically became a serious matter to him.
Steve was struggling to restrain his fear. The fear that Catherine had not survived the mission and that she would not return to his arm, to his house, to their bed, to him, that he would never be able to hear her amazing laugh, look at her beautiful face, feel her warm embrace, kiss her passionately... really freaked him out. The fear that when he went through nightmares every night, she would not be there to comfort him, to hug him tightly, to shush him, to push his fear away, to use her amazing way to bring him back to sleep... paralyzed him. When she was there, lying next to him, the nightmare rarely paid him a visit. Sleeping with her was one of the best things in their life, just as important as having sex with her. It was like she was some kind of angel, or a gift that God gave him... to make up for all the lost he went through earlier in his life. Whenever she was there, he didn't even need to touch her to sleep, (but he liked to touch her). Just the thought of her lying so close to him really calmed him down in a perfect way that no one could do.
She made him feel safe.
There was no other who could do the same for him.
After coming back from his run during the early morning, Steve still couldn't go back to his normal state. His thought was full of Catherine's voice, Catherine's face, her touches, her kisses. It's only 3AM in the morning, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't sleep. Instead, he sat in the couch where they used to make out every day after work, where sometimes Catherine even dragged him into the fantasy foxhole. He turned on Chicago album, so that music could fill in his entire lonely house. Finally, he pulled out a small book, picked up a pen and continued writing.
To-do list:
He added another thing needed to be done after the day Catherine returns.
"Propose her".
They met each other around 15 years ago, when both of them were very young. He has always thought of her as his best friend, his soul mate, until he realized he had feelings for her. Deep feelings, to be exact. Whichever title, she still has been the most crucial person in his life. She has been there for him longer than anyone else, even more than Mary, witnessed most of the special milestones in his career life and personal life. Proposing her after several months of separation did scare him a lot, but he had a strong feeling... the right time has come.
Thinking about it improved his mood dramatically. For a second, he almost forgot he had to go through today before jumping to "tomorrow". Time flies much slower without her, and much much slower when he was waiting for her to return.
Steve looked through the list he wrote over the months. That was actually Deb's idea. She visited him after he was rescued from the Taliban, the day after the day he set his foot on Hawaii. She asked about Catherine, and he let it all out, all the crying, without hiding anything, even just a bit, just like the day when he visited him in the prison. She hold him so close, and told him to make a to-do list, to create some great things to count on. She herself had a bucket list, which made her living her life much more worthwhile. There it goes. Every time he missed Catherine, he wrote something in this to-do list.
The first thing he wrote was "Tell her I love you every day" to make up for these days of separation. After hearing today's original story, Steve suddenly thought how lucky they were if they could be together every day, instead of watching each other from two opposite sides of the river, so that he underlined the words "every day". Creating a habit of telling his girl those three words in a regular basis didn't seem like his style, but it was worth it.
He wanted to make sure he would make his point crystal clear to her.
That he loved her. In love with her.
The second thing on the list was "Cook for her". He wrote that down after Mrs. Rollins visited him the other day. In his whole life, Steve hasn't ever been considered as a great cook, but somehow Catherine was always seduced by his cooking skills. Every time he cooked for her, they ended up on the floor in the kitchen. And he remembered how embarrassing it was when Doris accidentally stumbled upon them while they were making out on the floor. He was so mad at her because that was the third time she interrupted him and Catherine kissing.
Catherine was a big fan of Sushi, so Sushi was going to be the first dish he intended to learn. Mrs Rollins was more than willing to help. Hence, everything was well-planned inside Steve's head.
He wanted to make sure he would make his point crystal clear to her.
That he missed her. Missed her like crazy.
Another thing being written down in his list was "Buy her beautiful dress". Catherine wasn't the typical kind of girl who was a fashion victim to begin with. She didn't pay much attention to that kind of thing. She was a shopaholic, but her favorite items were books or weapons, like guns or knives, or technical gadgets like phones or laptop. His girl wasn't just a beauty, she was truly a brain. However, he had to admit she did have a great sense of style. Everything she was wearing was perfect, at least they always attracted him in a very sexual way. Even the least sexy outfit of hers still seduced him in an unpredicted way.
This line was written after Catherine's first phone call and he called her Princess. Since then, the thought of buying her beautiful dress always occupied his thoughts. Imagining the beautiful dress being worn in her slender body made him shiver. Steve shook his head and smiled.
His thoughts were suddenly drifting away to another part of the world.
That very moment... he realized how much he needed her... Needed her to be by his side.
Steve almost choked up when he read the line "Let her watch "The Notebook", even watch it with her". He looked up into the watch and sighed. It was just 3:30AM. Still too early and he didn't feel sleepy at all. He decided he should watch "The Notebook". As much as he hated it, he still kept a DVD at his home, because that's the only thing Catherine would do whenever she's bored. And it's always him trying to distract her.
He turned on the TV, but didn't really pay attention to the movie being shown. Actually, it's just a way to seek for the memories in the past. His mind drifted back to the Halloween nights, when she hadn't moved in but she was there. A lot of laugh, sweetness. And he was happy and relaxed when she was there. He didn't know what's on his screen right now, just couldn't stop thinking about her. He teased her that she used that movie to seduce him, but the fact was whenever she watched that stupid movie, she forgot about his presence and that made him not a happy camper. So he interrupted her, trying to seduce her and lost every time. That's why he hated that movie that much. But after all, somehow Catherine paid attention to him at some point, eventually, and he utilized that to not let Catherine watch the second half of the film.
That's their way. Seducing each other.
Her presence made him feel grounded.
This couch suddenly became so special at this moment. They used to sit right here, on this very couch, kissing, flirting, talking, looking at each other, or even just being silent.
He freaking missed that.
He freaking missed her.
And he added another line: "Have a date - eating out, going to the cinema, do what the normal couples do every once in a while". He didn't treat her like the normal boyfriends treated their girls. She's a strong girl, but sometimes she also liked to be wined and dined, like in Christmas day.
The very rare time they went to the cinema together, he was summoned to the crime scenes. She didn't say a word because she absolutely understood his job, but he himself felt bad about it. And work was busy all the time so it's really hard to spend little time going to the cinema again. It's not fair for her. He knew it and he's going to make up for her as much as he could.
Steve smiled to himself. He's changed. And he's actually getting nervous. Would Catherine like his change? Or would she claim he's not her Commander and demand to have her Commander back?
But he liked the thought of it. When she came back. When they fought over the small things. Yes, "fighting". He had to add "Fighting" into the list. It sounded weird, but some wise men said that "Every relationship becomes stronger after good fights".
The list would definitely go on... and on... and on...
They still had a great amount of things needed to be done.
When she came back.
Steve just hoped that day would eventually come.
Tomorrow was going to be an extremely long day.
When Catherine woke up after a short nap, she opened her sate phone and noticed there were four new messages.
"Be safe, Cath."
"Good luck, Cath."
"Come back home soon, Cath."
"I love you, Cath. Happy belated Chinese Valentine's Day!"
...