Note: Be warned, there be disjointed thoughts and run-on sentences ahead. I swear they're intentional. I was bored and wanted to type some craziness, since I'm stuck on a couple of other fics. Now that you know, continue if you please, but I've told you ahead of time.

---------------------------------------------------------

"I wish that you had never stopped me."

The porch swing creaked. Edea smelled of earth and time, heavy and damp. She had always been old. Never elderly or mature or any of the other countless words used to spare the feelings of the wrinkled and worn, Edea was old from the moment she was born. Wet from the womb, head still slathered with blood and tissue, the sorceress tore her way into being and her mother wept. She was old. No woman should be forced to give birth to time and no woman should be forced to be time.

"What?"

"Time compression. I wish that you had never stopped me."

The sun moved, but neither noticed. Quistis slid closer to her and held her hand, felt the pull of age under her skin. Age settled her, made her feel closer to what she was. Quistis was young, but she felt the pull. She had always felt it and she knew that Edea was made of pull. Selphie once said that Matron was scary when she was angry, but Quistis had never been frightened of her (forced on her, shouldn't have been, she is not a mother, she is time and she is not for you, little one) mother. Quistis just felt the pull and knew that Matron simply pulled when she was vexed. There was nothing scary about her. That was how such things (people, not things, not things, people, don't forget) worked.

"But, you weren't part of her when we defeated her. You had been separated by that point..."

"Oh, but she remembers. She remembers, child. She remembers and I remember. We were once we, if you recall..."

Oh yes, she recalled, but they had been told it was possession by a sorceress beyond time, beyond comprehension, beyond fault and blame. (possession, yes, that's funny, ha ha, funny, yes, possession, because all the bad THINGS in the world are bad because of possession, aren't they, pretty one)

"I'm sorry, Matron, but I don't think I understand."

Edea knew that she didn't understand. Of course she didn't understand. Quistis was young and beautiful and (old, dear, she's just as old as you now, and you made her that way, look at her and yes, she's still beautiful, but you are too, and you're both OLD and you have that in common, don't you) she didn't know what it meant to have the sorceress inside her. (oh, but your mother certainly knew what it was like to have a sorceress inside her, didn't she, and when your father entered her and they thought they LOVED each other, your mother knew, she knew, she knew then that she had a rotten sorceress fouling her womb and ruining her and it was all you, all you, all you)

"Matron? Are you alright?" The sun was gone now and the air was chill, though night was still frightened of evening and her peculiar half-reality, so some light yet remained. Quistis wished for darkness. Light stained the coast and she shuddered. Light should never stain anything.

"I wish you had never stopped me."

"I know. You just told me that."

Edea smiled then and Quistis felt the pull, fought against it because it was proper to do so, then fell to her knees because it was right. There was no fighting the pull, just as there had been no point in denying Edea her moment. (yes, our moment, your moment, all time compressed into an instant, that instant stretching forever but you're cowards and you fear me, you fear time, and it could have been your moment too, you selfish bitch,, what moments have you had since then, pretty one)

"You hear her too, don't you, child?"

"Her?" Quistis asked but she knew and she didn't want to know.

"Her, me, you...we're all the same now, aren't we? She was denied her moment, I was never allowed mine, and yours was stolen from you." (yes, I wanted my moment and Hyne raped his creations and made them so powerful, didn't he now, so that the world he created would hate the women who were forced to bear his power, because he wasn't strong enough for it all and it ATE HIM so that he had to share it with his children, like a good father should)

"Matron? You're shaking." (yes, she's shaking and she wants to shake so let her shake and tremble and destroy the world with her fear, because she tried once to stop herself and look what happened, she found herself a nice little husband who loved her so much that he agreed that she should be stopped so he built a school to train her own children to kill her, didn't he now, because he had power now and he wasn't strong enough for it all and it ATE HIM so that he had to share it with his children, like a good father should)

Edea kissed Quistis on the top of her head, like she did when she was a child. "You're shaking as well, dear." (oh, we're all sisters now, and she's shaking like we shake every night, yes one of the heroes and she shakes and wonders because she was always the smart one and she always figured things out much faster than the others, but they'll come around once she explains it to them, because she's the one that wants so badly to share but they won't let her, will they, though they smile and try to get her to dance, they tear her world down and they SMILE at the pieces because they are hers and she just doesn't matter as much, does she, and especially not to the father that sent her against her mother because he knew that he couldn't do it himself, the coward)

"I'm fine."

"And I'm fine too. Come now. It's getting chilly and you've been traveling all day. Let's go inside and make some tea." Edea appreciated the visits from all of her children, though she knew why Quistis came more often. She still felt the pull and the others had pulled away. Even the child that wasn't hers, the dark child with the angel wings; even she had pulled away, though she had tighter chains to the power than either of them sitting on the porch that night. She was bound, but she didn't feel the pull. "And while I'm making the tea, you can tell me about yourself."

"What?"

"You know, what you're doing, if you have a special someone, your favorite movies..."

Quistis smiled. She had none of these things, though neither did Edea. Pull.

"Matron? Could I ask you something?"

"Of course, Quistis."

"What would have happened if we hadn't stopped you? Or her, or whoever? What would have happened?"

Edea felt night move behind evening and slip a dagger into her throat. The light slinked into hidden dens, afraid of violent night and her shadows. "I don't know, but I want my moment and I know that you want yours too. I..."

"It doesn't matter, does it? It will happen one day anyway, won't it?"

Edea took her hand and led her into the stone house, away from night and back to tea, which seemed to be the only definite in their lives. "It might. It will. It won't. Time is a funny thing."

-------------------------------------------------