THE WILL TO LIVE

A/N: Set starting from the end of episode 23 and contain some references to Betray Me Not. Written for:

Caesar's Palace Monthly Oneshot Contest - Prompt: "You make me want to live, [Rowan]. Not survive; not exist. Live." - Aelin Ashryver Galathynius in Queen of Shadows.

Caesar's Palace Challenge: Summer Olympics - Table Tennis: "Write a hurt/comfort story."

All disclaimers apply.

Brandon's will to live had gone to the grave along with Dr. Tokioka. No renewal therapy meant an impending doom; he could feel the approaching death as he walked. The night breeze no longer refreshed his body; instead, it now chilled him to the core like the arctic wind. And his left arm... Lee's blade had torn its muscles, while Bear's fist had smashed the bones within. His dying regeneration system might have restored its appearance and some of its mobility, but another strong blow would surely destroy it.

He had to face the loss of his arm soon, because he hadn't settled his score with Harry. That murderer - a tyrant in Millennion, his former friend - still had a bodyguard with him.

Shutting the roll-up door, Brandon heard a child's cry. A pair of tiny arms then snaked around his waist, and he looked down. Mika... That poor girl must've known his incoming demise.

"Grave, please stop fighting," she begged, crying into his stomach. "I don't want to be all alone."

He could only hug her back.

Brandon had first thought of getting his revenge done, liberating Millennion, and avenging Mika's parents by killing Harry. Yet when he met that murderer, memories of their past in the orphanage swept him. He remembered how Harry greeted him with a smile, ran around the field with him to chase a piece of flying cloth, and snapped at the orphanage's crazy boss for beating them up...

Those had prevented his trigger finger from moving. Worse yet, they had forced his body to take a barrage of bullets for Harry. If Mika saw this, what would she say?

As he lay on the ground, bruised, battered, and dying, he realized that he had made the wrong choice. He should've killed Harry instead of protecting him. But then, his mind projected a piece of flying cloth in the sky, reminding him of the moment he ran around the field with little Harry.

"I've chosen my best friend over Millennion," he muttered, tears escaping from his eye, "but I have no regrets."

His words resulted in a crying Harry. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry for everything, Brandon!"

Brandon nodded slightly. "There's nothing left in this world." He pointed his gun at Harry's head. "Let's go home, Harry."

After a brief pause, Harry also pointed his gun at him. "Yes, let's do it, Brandon."

They pulled the triggers and...bang.

But only Harry received a gaping wound on his head. How was this possible? Brandon could swear that he had seen Harry pulling the trigger of his gun! Perhaps Harry's pistol had no bullets? He wasn't sure.

"Brandon! Brandon! Brandon!"

That scream came from afar, but it pierced both his eardrums and heart. Mika... She didn't even call him by his alias now. Damn, what would she say if she found out about what he had done?

It felt as though the universe hated him with burning passion. And his will to live fell deeper into the darkness of the grave.

Initially, Brandon had thought Mika would scorn him for not killing Harry, and her pleading with Biscoe to save him would only serve to torture him. But his assumption had been incorrect; instead of chiding him for his treasonous deed, she had hugged him and said, "You're my family, Brandon, and I'll always love you."

Tears of joy had leaked out of his eye almost in an instant.

This morning, as he lay on his bed with an oxygen mask, he heard a creak from the trailer's door. Rising to a sitting position, he saw Mika stepping in with a folded newspaper in her hand.

"Wow, you're already up?" She smiled, slamming the door shut. "You're feeling better now?"

He replied with a nod and a smile.

After taking off her shoes, Mika rushed to him and handed the newspaper. "Didn't want you to feel bored." She climbed onto his bed. "If you need anything else, just tell me."

Brandon couldn't help but shed a few tears at this. I have to repay her once I recover. Pulling her into his one-armed embrace, he spoke in a muffled voice, "Do you know? You make me want to live, Mika. Not survive; not exist. Live."

"Really?"

Brandon nodded. His will to live had resurfaced from the grave.