A/N: I don't own any of the Criminal Minds characters and I am not making any money from writing this.

Please forgive any minor spelling or grammar mistakes, English is not my native language. Inadventertly

This story takes place post the episode "Magnificent Light". This is basically Barry Flynn/Rena Tracey pairing. She was his manager, portrayed by Kari Wahlgreen. The story assumes that Barry lived close to Seattle.

Rena was running away from the reception into the hallway. They had told her that Barry was on a second floor, hospital room 3R. She felt her heart jump upon finding the room: she instantly pushed the door wide open and rushed inside.

Barry was in that hospital room, alone. He was lying face up on the hospital bed, covered with a sheet up to his waist. It was scary and... also off somehow, seeing him in such state. He looked weak and tired. His face was alarmingly pale. Rena felt so angry at herself for not being more concerned for him at first, because she had thought that he was just doing whatever he wanted to do between the lectures.

She immediately rushed over to him and sat on the chair near by. "What happened?", was all she could say.

"Some guy... he abducted me and all..." He groaned as he adjusted himself on the bed. "I have already told the police everything, I really don't..."

"It's OK", Rena said softly. Somehow, that made Barry feel much better. More relaxed, if anything. He sighed and closed his eyes for a moment, tilting his head at the side. Rena said nothing, she just gently squeezed his hand, intertwining their fingers together. He almost jumped in his bed, but opening his eyes he was glad to see that it was just Rena... holding his hand. They both knew what the gasp, that had escaped his lips as soon as his body had registered the physical contact, meant.

"How long will you... stay here?", Rena eventually asked, more to make an awkward subject about to emerge drop then because she actually wanted to know.

"I should be out in a few days", Barry whispered, giving her hand a weak squeeze. She blushed, but hoped that he didn't notice that. "I only have a cut." He forced a smile. "A pretty nasty one, but nothing more than that."

Rena couldn't help but chuckle, albeit somewhat bitterly. So typical for Barry, to always find something funny and positive, even in the worst situations imaginable. He has build his whole career thanks to that ability, after all. "I'm glad to hear that", she whispered, returning a smile.

At that moment, a nurse walked inside and announced that visiting hours were over. Rena had to go. She slowly pulled her hand away and grabbed her purse, groaning in frustration, but she didn't forget to give Barry a small smile before leaving.

#

Her apartment was small but nice and very well decorated. Special thing about it was that in every room, walls were of a different color. In the hallway, walls were painted white. In the kitchen, walls were painted pink. She had chosen yellow for the living room, green for the bathroom and blue for her bedroom.

She had been making plenty of money and could have purchased a much bigger and more expensive apartment, even a house, if only she wanted-but for some reason, she didn't. She thought back at the time she had chosen her apartment as she started making herself some tea.

Having almost no energy left, she just kept staring at the tea pot, inhaling the tender smell of the warm bevarage inside sharply. All that still felt so... frightening. Unreal. She poured herself a cup of tea and walked in her bedroom, closing the door behind. She sat down on her bed. Image of Barry, lying on the hospital bed, suddenly flashed in front of her eyes. Rena suddenly felt herself chill, so she wrapped a blanket around herself and tightened a grip on her cup of tea.

Barry could have died. She instantly imagined all of his followers grieving for him, talking to the news reporters, saying how much he has meant to them and how much they have missed him already. And she simply couldn't imagine herself among them. Or, even worse, she could imagine herself among them: in the very end of the line, never saying a word. Watching everyone else paying their condolances at him while standing aside. Suffering in silence, alone and in the same time surrounded with hundreds of people. Thinking of the things that could have been.

She shuddered at the sound of her ringtone. She picked up her phone and looked at the screen. It was a text message from Barry.

They have said that I will be out in four days, but I will need to rest. Just wanted you to know that.

She felt a relief rush through her body and messaged him back.

Glad to hear that. You OK?

Soon, he answered her.

Yeah. Doing fine?

She thought about something for a moment before writing another sentence, her hand shaking a little as she did.

I do. You need me to come over?

She pouted her lips and tilted her head at the side, observing the message for a moment before clicking a "Send" button.

She took a sip of tea, her eyes never leaving the phone screen. It didn't take long for him to reply.

No. Go back to sleep.

And soon after:

But thanks for asking. Can you drop by tomorrow, please?

She felt like she couldn't move her fingers fast enough as she typed: Sure :)

And then immediately pressed "Send" button.

Just as she finished drinking her tea, she got her response

:)

That was the last thing she saw before she fell asleep.

#

He looked better the next day. More color to his face, and he generally looked stronger.

"Several news reporters visited me today", he admitted.

"What did you tell them?"

"I said that I had nothing to say, that I am just glad to be alive and well, and that they should contact the police if they want to know something more."

Rena smiled. "Good choice."

#

Third day. Barry sighed, feeling frustrated. He couldn't sleep. First two days, he was scared, but he was at least grateful to be alive and able to sleep. But now, he couldn't stop thinking about things that were sure to follow after the dust would settle. Trial. Influence that it will have on his career. Possibility od developing a PTSD, even. Having a scar, possibly for the rest of his life, a mark, reminding him of Carl Finster, man driven to kill by his psychocis... triggered by his words, and innocent people that had died. Shivers suddenly seeped down his throat and he suddenly felt a pressure in his chest.

He suddenly felt a need to be with Rena... he wanted Rena to be there. But he didn't want to bother her, he didn't even call her, so he spent that night alone. He remembered how tired she looked last time she had visited him, and he wanted her to have some time for herself, to... not feel like him. He didn't sleep. But the thought that she finally got some time for herself, image of her sleeping peacefully, calmed him somehow. He almost felt like he had no one but her to hold on to.

#

Barry was released from the hospital two days later. He and Rena agreed that she would drop him by his house after he exits the hospital through the back door, to make sure that they would escape the press. She stored his suitcase in the trunk and helped him get in the car, despite his protests, then pulled the car into a gear and drove away. Ride to his house was silent and slow. But once Rena pulled into the drive way.

"I'm happy for you", she said, her lips feeling dry as she took her seat belt off. Barry looked at her, slight smile on his face. "You made it."

"Thank you for helping me."

She grinned at him, her hands still pressed tightly against the steering wheel. "Hey, that's what friends are for, right?" She bit her tongue immediately after words left her lips, afraid that she had said more than she needed... or intended to. But Barry just nodded his head, nothing but approval in his eyes. "Right."

#

With Barry deciding to take at least a week or two long break from lectures, he decided to take some idoms from the conference hall back to his home. Rena insisted to help him, but did allow him to carry some smaller idoms.

"If anything, at least this incident provided us with lots of extra publicity."

Her voice was overly cheery, to a point that it was almost cringe worthy (not as much as the statement itself though) but it was also soft and caring. Barry sighed silently as he put the box down on the shelf. Rena continued talking. "Of course, you will probably have to... take a break from all that for a while..."

"Rena", Barry suddenly spoke, surprised upon realizing that his nanager's name had left his lips. Making her stop talking and suddenly stand still.

He turned to face her and began approaching her. She was looking up at him, her eyes sparkling with some sort of... light. It looked magnificent.

"You are responsible for what I have made out of myself", he said, then remained silent for a few moments, allowing the statement to sink in before he continued. "Without you, I would be nothing." He looked down at the floor for a moment, his lower lip starting to quiver as he looked back up. "And I don't think I have ever appreciated you enough", he whispered.

She looked down at the floor, feeling her hands shake. "I am guilty too, for allowing you to have so much freedom. I have barely set any boundaries. I should have known that some of your fans could be dangerous."

"It wasn't your fault."

"You were... are the first client of mine who is really... profitable." She paused, suddenly feeling discouraged. But she continued talking almost immediately. "I was afraid that, if I didn't agree with most of your terms, you would leave, or loose your creativity or something." She looked away and, not really inadvertently, lowered her voice. She was still able to feel Barry's gaze on her face. She felt like his eyes were burning a hole through her skin. "So I obeyed." She choked back tears, avoiding to look at him, but couldn't help but add: "And you almost got killed because of that." Somehow, in about the same time, she turned back to face him.

"I have read all of your books. I have listened to all of your lectures. I have tried my best to... apply your wisdom to myself. To live by your words. I don't know why. I have had a great job, I have been making lots of money, I have had a great place to live. But I guess... I have always felt that something had been missing. And I thought that your words would help me figure out what that was. So I would know what to look for. So I could find it and fill in that gap. But they never did."

She raised her head higher to meet his gaze. "My life has become much better since I have started working with you. You are without a doubt the nicest, the most charming, the most intelligent person I have ever met. But still... something has always been missing, so I kept trying to find a solace in your words", she exclaimed, suddenly feeling something between a fury and passion in her voice. Barry tilted his head at the side, tone of Rena'a voice sending a heat rush through his body, just at the moment when their eyes locked. Rena shivered, but remained still in her somewhat proud position. "Maybe I should have tried finding it in you."

He already has thousands of followers, people who think of him like a God, why would he need some small town girl who isn't even that interested in his legacy?

Her thoughts were interrupted due to him pressing his lips against hers. Her heart rate increased rapidly, her breathing hitched. Barry gently put his hands on her shoulders, his knees suddenly feeling weak. But once he felt her hands pressing against the back of his neck, her tongue gently entering his mouth, everything was alright.

Over the course of his career, Barry has come up with hundreds of proverbs, lines, even jokes about love. But at that moment, when he was thinking about love, experiancing it even, only one word was echoing through his mind. One name.

Rena.