Five
You're five when it happens. You're five when the world as you know it comes tumbling down.
You're in the living room, happily scribbling away on a sheet of paper, brown crayon grasped tightly in hand. You're drawing a dragon: a fire-breathing, magical dragon! It would live in a cave at the top of a mountain, and you are in the middle of drawing said cave when your daddy walks slowly into the room, steps heavy with despondency.
However, you don't immediately notice his broken demeanor, the red-rimmed eyes—the palpable anguish—at all. Instead, you simply jump up, grab your dragon and run over to him, shoving your masterpiece into his hands and exclaiming, "Daddy! Look what I drew, look!"
He gives you a weak smile, and carefully sets your dragon down on the coffee table. He then crouches so that he is now at your eye-level.
This is when you first notice something off. Daddy didn't want to play; instead, he was quiet and serious. In fact, he was crying! This terrifies you more than anything: your daddy never cried (little did you know, this would grow increasingly common in the subsequent months).
"Henry... daddy has something important he needs to tell you," he starts hesitantly, "You remember... do you remember when we were watching Lion King last week, and in the middle, Simba's dad... he went to sleep, and never woke up?"
You nod, unsure of where he's going with this.
"That—the sleeping, it's something called dying and it...it lasts forever. That's because..." he pauses, as if struggling to find the right words, "…because even though Mufasa's body was still here on earth, his soul left, see? It left earth, because it went somewhere way better."
Ever the curious child, you cock your head and ask, "Where?"
"I don't know, buddy... that's what's so magic about it, see? No one knows exactly where it is. But believe me, its peaceful there."
You find yourself nodding again.
"So...Henry," he says, taking your tiny hand in his large one, "even though The Lion King is a cartoon, this can happen in the real world too, little man. Sometimes... sometimes people die, and they can't come back to us—they go away to the better place forever." Your dad looks away at this point, and wipes at his eyes with the back of his free hand. "They don't come back... not because they don't want to, but because they c-can't."
Growing more and more bewildered at this uncharacteristic behaviour, you launch yourself into your father's arms and give him a great big hug. "Don't be sad, daddy."
Your dad says nothing but brings you in closer to himself and hangs on tightly, as one would a lifeline.
"Where's mommy?" you ask, hoping that she would come and take away the sadness—one of the constants you've come to rely on.
"Henry...I..." he pauses and says, "It'll be really hard, but it's just gonna be you and me from now on, okay?" he stares at you with red-rimmed eyes, silently willing you to make the connection between this new statement and the earlier conversation—for fear of having to explicitly voice the horrid truth himself.
Unfortunately, you don't. To your credit though, you manage to stay silent and wait for your dad to continue.
And he does continue, with words that change your life. The next words you hear destroy the world you had up until then. The next words you hear will forever be ingrained into your memory:
"Mommy's not coming home, Henry."
A/N: so here's the first installment; I hope you all like it. To be honest, there's no real plot to this story-it'll simply be chronicling certain moments/turning points in Henry's life as comes to terms with JJ's passing, and how he grows up. The next chapter will be up soon (I have all 6 drafted, just need to hash them out some more). Thanks for reading, and if you have time, please leave a review 'cause I'd love to hear what you all think!